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It started out as a completely normal lunch with Adachi.
“What would you like to get, Adachi?” Kurosawa asked as he and Adachi moved through the line at a small cafe.
Adachi looked up at him. “I think I'll get the same thing I always get.”
Kurosawa nodded as he dug through his jacket pocket and held his wallet. “Alright, two sandwiches then.”
Kurosawa turned to the cashier and ordered for him and Adachi and waited. As he waited, he caught a glimpse of Adachi admiring a piece of chocolate cake in the counter window. Then he was eyeing a slice of strawberry cake, then a different dessert, then another . . .
“Sir, are you ready to pay for your food?”
Kurosawa jumped. “Oh! Yes, thank you.”
As they sat at their table, Kurosawa watched Adachi eating across from him looking completely content.
“Adachi,” Kurosawa began, and Adachi looked up and met his eyes, “are you sure you don’t want anything else to eat?”
Adachi gently shook his head. “Nope, I'm good!” He smiled and took another bite of his food, looking down at his plate. He paused and looked up again. “Is there anything else you want, Kurosawa?”
Kurosawa smiled. “No, I'm okay, too.”
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“Man, it’s getting hot outside . . .” Kurosawa said, taking his jacket off and holding it in his arm as he and Adachi walked down the street. As they walked, they passed by a small bakery. Out of curiosity, Kurosawa looked over at Adachi, and sure enough, he was looking into the window and scoping it out.
Kurosawa took Adachi’s hand and led him to the door. “Let’s go in here and check it out, Adachi!”
Adachi looked at him, surprised. “A- Are you sure? We did just eat—” Adachi said, looking down at his feet, almost like he was ashamed. Seeing Adachi act shy was adorable, but the site was making Kurosawa feel a bit sad.
“Of course, Adachi.” he assured him. Then they stepped inside.
Adachi looked around him in wonder. “Wow, it smells so nice in here, and these desserts look so good!” He walked with Kurosawa, still holding onto his hand, and looked through display cases with many different sweets. Adachi squeezed Kurosawa’s hand gently, and Kurosawa looked over at him. Adachi had a faint blush on his face, the face he always made when he was feeling shy about something, like the next thing he was about to say.
He spoke quietly right next to Kurosawa. “What kind of desserts do you like, Kurosawa?”
Kurosawa thought to himself. “I’ve never been one to eat many sweets, but I do like having cake for my birthday or chocolates for Valentine’s Day. Actually, now that I think about it, I do really like chocolates.”
Adachi smiled and nodded, which was a relief to Kurosawa; he looked much less tense and shy and appeared much happier. “Chocolate is really good. I like desserts with fruits, like strawberry, the most.”
Kurosawa looked over and saw a delicious-looking strawberry roll cake in the case next to him, so he tapped on Adachi’s shoulder and pointed to the cake behind the glass. Adachi looked at the dessert like he was counting every seed on every strawberry.
“That looks really good.” Adachi quietly said. This confirms my theory, Kurosawa thought to himself,
Adachi has a sweet tooth for sure!
Kurosawa was glad that Adachi could no longer read his mind, because thoughts of how absolutely adorable Adachi is were filling his mind. He stood up straight and quickly got his wallet from his pocket again.
“Adachi, let’s buy it!” Kurosawa told him.
“Really?! Isn’t that a lot of cake to just . . . buy? And it’s kind of expensive—” Adachi stuttered. He was looking down and fidgeting with his hands, that shy look returning to his face hidden by his bangs.
“Adachi, I’d love to buy this for you.” Adachi looked up only to be blinded by Kurosawa’s smile.
“Um, o- okay.” Adachi agreed. Even though he was shy, Kurosawa could sense his excitement and happiness.
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“You’re such a great cook, Yuichi.” Adachi complimented as he ate his dinner. Kurosawa began eating as well as they sat together silently. At that moment, he kept thinking about earlier that day when they were in town. He wondered why Adachi seemed so embarrassed about his taste in food. Adachi was healthy, and a little treat every once in a while wouldn’t hurt him. He has nothing to be ashamed about! he thought.
“Hm? What are you thinking about, Yuichi?” Adachi asked.
Kurosawa blinked. “Huh? Oh, I must’ve been lost in thought for a moment.”
Once they were done, Adachi got up and helped clean the dishes and put them back where they belong. While he was busy, Kurosawa cut a piece of cake and put it on a small plate and set it at Adachi’s spot at the table. While Adachi was drying a plate off with a towel, he glanced over to see what Kurosawa was doing and saw the dessert waiting for him. He began cleaning the dishes at record speed and then walked back to the table to sit down.
“Wait, Yuichi, don’t you want a piece too?”
“Sure, I'll try some.” Kurosawa got himself a piece and walked back to see that Adachi hadn’t started eating—he was sitting and waiting for Kurosawa to join him again. Kurosawa approached his seat and looked at Adachi who had the same shy expression again. Once Kurosawa sat back down, Adachi relaxed a bit and took a bite.
His eyes lit up and he adorably smiled. “This is so good!” he exclaimed. He began eating the whole piece, savoring each bite. Kurosawa loved seeing Adachi joyful in little moments like these, but he couldn’t stop thinking about how self-conscious Adachi looked earlier. Adachi often got embarrassed easily, and he knew that it was common for people to be self-conscious about food and eating habits, but Adachi usually didn’t get that way while eating; he enjoyed eating at restaurants and wasn’t ashamed of his food choices when they went out for a meal together.
When he was done, Adachi got up and took his plate into the kitchen. As he walked away, he spoke to Kurosawa from the next room. “I’m going to start a bath. Do you want to get in the bath together?”
“Sure, I'll clear off the rest of the table while you get the bath ready.” Kurosawa walked towards him and gave him a kiss. Adachi smiled, then walked into the bathroom.
Before following him, Kurosawa thought to himself again, there’s only one person I can ask about this.
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“Adachi has the most extreme sweet tooth of any individual I have met in my entire life.”
“WHAT?!” Kurosawa shouted. “How have I not heard this until now?!”
Tsuge quietly laughed and shifted in his seat. “Because Adachi is extremely shy—this, you know for sure.”
“Of course I do, but this just seems like a strange thing to keep secret, and I don’t think I’ve ever seen him act so embarrassed before . . .”
Tsuge sighed. “. . . Well, there is actually a backstory to Adachi’s secret love for sweets.”
Kurosawa scooted forward, intrigued. “Tell me.”
So Tsuge began the story:
“Ever since Adachi was a child, he has loved sweet foods—that is one of many facts about himself that he shared with me long ago. He still loves practically all desserts up to this day. When he was younger, he used to eat candy almost every day. There was usually some in his lunch, or he had some sort of dessert once he returned home from school.
“He was the same way in college. He was never really athletic, but he was blessed with a high metabolism, so he can eat a lot of food without gaining much weight at all. Usually, when we went out for a bite to eat together, he would get some sort of dessert with his meal, or sometimes he would even only order dessert and just eat that.”
Tsuge shifted again in his chair like he was uncomfortable, looking beside him as he remembered more of the story.
“One day, me and Adachi were invited by his brother to go out and get lunch with him and some of his friends. We knew his brother at that point—well, of course Adachi knew him, but anyways—but we didn’t know his friends, even though they went to the same college as us. We all got something to eat, and after our meal, Adachi got dessert.” Tsuge’s expression became tense.
“While we sat there, Adachi’s brother had to take a call, so he stepped outside for a few minutes. I also got up to use the restroom around the corner, and when I came back, I heard the others at the table judging Adachi for his eating habits. They told him that they always saw him eating that kind of food in the cafeteria and that they were surprised he was still so skinny, and they were looking down on him. When I sat back down, Adachi got up and went to the restroom, and when he came back after quite a while, his eyes were slightly red, so he must’ve been crying.”
Kurosawa couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “I had no idea that this happened!”
Tsuge nodded. “Adachi doesn’t ever talk about this specific memory. After that encounter, Adachi stopped eating dessert—he never brought sweet foods to lunch, never ordered dessert at restaurants, and even when he was alone at the store or alone with me, he never even mentioned the mere concept of ordering or buying himself something for dessert. Adachi became afraid of his favorite foods because he now associates them with being shamed or judged. When he was out with you the other day, he was probably scared that you would judge him, and you’re the last person Adachi wants judging him.”
Kurosawa looked down, thinking about the story he just heard with sadness. He had no idea that Adachi was so self-conscious about the food he was eating and how much he must’ve worried whenever a waiter or waitress asked them about ordering dessert, or when they went out to eat just the other day and Kurosawa dragged him into a bakery of all places.
“How do you think I can help Adachi?” Kurosawa asked desperately.
Tsuge thought to himself for a moment before answering. “I’m not really sure, he’s been this way since his early twenties. Adachi can be easy to read sometimes but also hard to really figure out.”
As Kurosawa headed for the door, Tsuge stopped him and spoke to him in the doorway.
“One thing I can say for sure is that Adachi has gotten much better at voicing his emotions since meeting you. If there’s one person that can help him, it’s you.” He paused, thinking. “One suggestion I can make is maybe buying desserts for him and sharing them with him often so that he doesn’t have to worry about you judging him or feeling embarrassed.”
Kurosawa nodded. “I’ll try that—thanks, Tsuge.”
Tsuge smiled and waved as Kurosawa left. “Of course. Say hi to Adachi for me, please.”
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At some point while he and Adachi visited Adachi’s family for dinner, Kurosawa was sitting at the table alone with Adachi’s younger brother Kazuya. Does his brother know? Kurosawa wondered.
As he was about to stand up and leave the table, Kurosawa stopped him. “Wait, can I ask you something about Adachi?”
He sat back down with a confused but also curious look. “Aren’t you literally married to Adachi?”
“Adachi is self-conscious about eating certain foods, isn’t he?”
Kazuya looked down uncomfortably. “. . . Yes, he is, but I told him I wouldn’t tell anyone. How did you know? Did his friend tell you?”
“He only helped me confirm the theory. I just found out a few weeks ago.”
Kazuya stood up, promising that he would be back soon. When he came back, he was holding a small, slightly-crumpled paper with childish handwriting. “This is a list of Adachi’s favorite desserts and where to buy them. He made this when he was a kid, but his taste was still the same until college, so the list still holds true.”
Kurosawa looked through the list; cakes, pies, tarts, ice cream, and much more were listed. At the top of the list was strawberry cake, which made Kurosawa smile.
Kazuya scratched the back of his neck. “Um, just, don’t tell Kiyoshi I gave you that.”
Kurosawa smiled. “I won’t, I'll keep it hidden for now.”
Kurosawa heard Adachi call his name from near the front door, asking if he was ready to go home. Kurosawa stood up and headed towards the door, and when he looked back at Kazuya, he saw him looking down and smiling.
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The next day was shopping day, and Kurosawa held the grocery list in his hand. Behind the piece of paper, he was hiding Adachi’s list of desserts. As Adachi reached the last few items from the shelf in front of him, Kurosawa glanced at the second list and then put it back once he had a dessert picked out.
“I think we have everything now,” Adachi said as he placed the items in the cart.
“Actually, there’s something else I want to get today. How about you head over towards the checkouts and I'll meet you there?”
Adachi nodded. He looked curious, but not embarrassed or shy. “Okay!”
When Kurosawa came back, Adachi was looking to the side, distracted by something else, so Kurosawa decided to make his plan a surprise as he began scanning items and placing them in bags where Adachi couldn’t see them.
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“Are you done with your food, Kiyoshi?” Adachi nodded, so Kurosawa took their dishes back to the kitchen and set them in the sink to be washed later. Adachi was still sitting at the table when Kurosawa came back, which was perfect for his plan.
“What do you have there, Yuichi?” Adachi asked, looking up from his phone.
“Well, I bought ourselves a little treat!” He smiled and sat down, passing Adachi a bowl and placing one in front of himself as well. Adachi put his phone down and observed what was set in front of him, and his expression went from neutral to excited.
“Ah! It’s Neapolitan!” he exclaimed.
Kurosawa smiled. “It’s kind of perfect, really—since you like strawberry and I like chocolate.”
“Oh yeah! I never thought of that!” Adachi laughed and began eating. He didn’t look ashamed or embarrassed at all. He was happy, and so was Kurosawa.
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The waitress stood next to their table and asked, “Would you two like anything for dessert this evening?”
Kurosawa glanced at Adachi quickly. He was looking down at his menu, but it looked like he was zoning out. Instead of saying no, like he usually did by default, Kurosawa answered “Yes, I'll have a slice of chocolate cake, please.”
Adachi’s gaze shot up towards Kurosawa instantly.
“Is there anything you’d like, Adachi?” Kurosawa said to him quietly.
“Um,” he began nervously, but quickly relaxed and smiled a bit as he read the menu. “I’ll have . . . the crème brûlée, please?”
The waitress took their menus and walked back towards the front desk and kitchen. Kurosawa looked around once the waitress was gone and then held Adachi’s hand in his. Adachi blushed and smiled, now fully relaxed.
“What’s a crème brûlée? I’m not sure if I’ve ever had one,” Kurosawa asked.
“Oh! It’s a really good French dessert.” Adachi explained happily. “How about you try some of mine?”
Kurosawa smiled. “That sounds great.”
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Buying ice cream was becoming a normal thing in the Kurosawa and Adachi household—at least to Kurosawa, that is.
“Would you like some more, Kiyoshi?” Kurosawa asked as he watched Adachi take the last bite of ice cream from his bowl.
“No thanks, I'm good.” After the table was cleaned up, Adachi went into their bedroom to get pajamas on and get ready for bed, and so shortly after, Kurosawa did the same. After watching some television, they both got in bed and went to sleep.
In the middle of the night, Kurosawa awoke to a noise coming from a different room. He turned over to see Adachi’s spot empty. He must be in the bathroom, Kurosawa thought. He checked his phone for the time and saw the numbers 11:49 before being blinded by the phone’s brightness. He rolled over again, trying to fall back asleep, until he heard an unusual noise coming from . . . the kitchen?
Kurosawa stood up and walked quietly through the hallway. At the end of the hallway, he snaked his head around the corner to observe the kitchen. As soon as he focused his vision, he could clearly see the source of the sound;
Adachi was standing by the fridge with a spoon in his hand. He closed it and put the spoon in the sink and began quietly walking back towards the hallway. Ah! I’ll probably scare him if I stand here like this, Kurosawa thought, so he rushed back into bed and laid back down. Once Adachi came back in, it looked like Kurosawa hadn’t even stirred; but when Adachi got back in bed, Kurosawa turned to face him.
“Oh, sorry I woke you up, Yuichi,” Adachi whispered. Suddenly, he looked up into Kurosawa’s eyes with concern. “Hey, is something wrong? You look a bit upset.” Adachi wrapped his arms around Kurosawa’s waist and held him as they lay there together, and Kurosawa hugged him back, keeping his arms at Adachi’s sides.
“Kiyoshi, there’s something I think we should talk about.”
Adachi, relaxed, looked him in the eyes and listened. “Okay. I'm listening, Yuichi.”
“Kiyoshi . . .” he whispered, “you’re scared of eating desserts in front of people, aren’t you . . .” Suddenly, Adachi became tense. He realized that his biggest secret had been found out, and not only that, but by his husband. His memory from years ago replayed in his head, and feelings of shame and embarrassment took over him.
“H-Huh? Y- Yuichi, I . . .” he stuttered.
Kurosawa felt Adachi press their bodies close together, and he could hear Adachi crying with his hands hiding his face. Oh no! He thought, his mind racing. This was definitely a bad time to bring it up! I should’ve known, and Kiyoshi probably feels so vulnerable right now . . . “Kiyoshi, I’m really sorry—”
“No, you don’t need to be sorry,” Adachi said, beginning to calm down. “It’s just . . . I haven’t talked about it in a really long time. I feel so em- embarrassed . . . you saw me eating in the kitchen like a child!”
“Kiyoshi! It’s okay, you’re not childish! Sometimes I get up in the middle of the night to eat, too!” Kurosawa hugged him again, helping him relax. Kurosawa sighed. “Kiyoshi, I had no idea you loved sweets so much until only about a month ago, and all I’ve wanted to do is spoil you! I know what happened to you a long time ago, and I’m really sorry that happened to you.”
Kurosawa paused and pulled away from Adachi’s body slightly. Adachi was pretty-much back to normal, but his eyes were still wet and he was blushing quite a bit. "It's true; I have a really extreme sweet tooth. Because of that event, though, I feel really embarrassed when I eat really unhealthy foods in front of people. And once I realized that they, and maybe others too, had been judging me for a long time before . . . I lost any confidence I had in the way I ate."
Kurosawa continued speaking, quietly and calmly. “I would never make fun of you, Kiyoshi. I think you’re adorable, and the way you act isn’t ever embarrassing to me.” Kurosawa began brushing Adachi’s hair with his fingers, and Adachi let his head bury into the pillow as he melted at Kurosawa’s touch, listening to his soothing voice. It was so comforting to Adachi.
“Is this why you’ve been buying so many desserts this past month?”
Kurosawa smiled, feeling no shame at all. He looked proud of himself, really. “Yes.”
Blush returned to Adachi’s face, but he wasn’t upset at all—he was happy. It was the same happiness Adachi secretly felt when he was eating dessert with Kurosawa sitting across from him, enjoying it too.
“Please, never feel embarrassed about the foods you like when you’re with or without me. We can keep enjoying desserts together, but don’t feel ashamed of the things you want.” Kurosawa moved his hands to Adachi’s hips. “Your body is healthy and very beautiful, and you’re very handsome . . .” Kurosawa paused.
Adachi raised an eyebrow. “. . . what were you about to say?”
Kurosawa looked at him like the answer was obvious. “That you’re also veeeeery sexy.”
“. . . Yuichi,” Adachi began, and Kurosawa expected him to hide his flushed face in his hands, but instead, he kissed Kurosawa’s lips. Kurosawa kissed him back, and when Adachi pulled away, he whispered to Kurosawa “I love you.”
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Kurosawa walked under a large, shady tree and waved to Adachi. “Adachi!” he shouted, “This seems like a good spot!”
Adachi nodded and walked over with the picnic basket in his hands. Kurosawa spread the blanket on the ground in a nice, cool, shady spot and kneeled down. Adachi sat beside him and they began setting out food and their plates. Kurosawa had woken up bright and early to prepare for this picnic, cooking all sorts of foods both he and Adachi loved.
Adachi admired the spread of food. “. . . I still can’t believe you can cook all of this food in one morning.”
“Actually, I made a few things yesterday so that I could get most of it done today!”
Adachi laughed as he began filling his plate with food, and Kurosawa did the same.
Once they were done, Kurosawa opened the basket again and lifted a round tin out.
“I was wondering what that was,” Adachi said curiously.
“I also did some baking—for dessert!” Kurosawa said excitedly, because now when he looked up at Adachi, he was smiling, not an ounce of negativity in his expression. “Do you like apple pie?”
“I love apple pie!” While Kurosawa cut them each a piece, Adachi thought to himself silently. “How do you always know my favorite desserts?” Then he seemed to realize. “Wait—you have my list, don’t you?”
Kurosawa froze. Oh, I haven’t told him! I wonder if he'll become embarrassed or upset again!
Before Kurosawa could speak, Adachi began to laugh. “I almost forgot about that old thing! I remember sitting at the kitchen table and making that when I was little!” For a moment, Kurosawa could’ve sworn he saw tears forming in Adachi’s eyes. They could’ve been from laughing, or maybe he was thinking about his childhood, or the many memories, good and bad, related to the foods on that list.
Adachi reached out his hands and took the plate Kurosawa handed him, taking a bite as soon as his fork was in his hand. “This is great, Yuichi!”
Kurosawa ate his piece. “I’m glad you like it!”
Once Adachi was done with his piece and Kurosawa was still finishing his, Adachi leaned into Kurosawa’s side and wrapped his arm around his waist as they sat next to each other.
“Is this okay? I don’t see any people around, so—”
“This is more than okay. I love this.”
Adachi laughed and leaned his head against Kurosawa’s shoulder.
Once Kurosawa was done, and he was about to wrap his arm around Adachi, Adachi sat up.
“Actually . . . can I have another slice of pie, please?” He held out his plate, and Kurosawa smiled, taking it from his hands and cutting another piece.
“Of course.”