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Ena heard a knock at her door. That should have been her first clue that something was wrong. But she didn’t question it.
Ugh, What does he want now?
“Sorry guys, one sec,” She said to the rest of Nightcord, and muted herself.
“Come in,” She said, and Akito poked his head in,
“What do you want, asshole?” She asked, irritated
She turned toward the door, and saw–
Oh fuck. He looked like shit.
Akito flinched at her words, and pursed his lips together. “Nevermind, sorry,” He said, quietly, and started to back away.
“No, wait,” She said, feeling a wave of concern, “What's wrong?”
Akito inhaled slowly before responding, “It’s nothing. I don’t want to bother you when you're clearly busy…”
Ena blinked at him. She had never seen him look this… scared before. “Well that's bullshit. You never care about bothering me, and you never even knock. So clearly something's wrong.
“Seriously, its-”
“Enanan? You good?” Mizuki’s voice interrupted from her computer.
Ena sighed and unmuted herself for a moment, “Yeah just talking with Akito about something, I’ll be back in a little while-”
“Oh Lil’ Bro’s there?” Mizuki asked.
“Don’t call me that,” Akito snapped immediately, much harsher than normal.
“Booooo you’re no fun!”
“Be back in a bit,” Ena interrupted, muting herself–and Mizuki– again.
She turned back to Akito, who was still standing in the doorway.
“So, you gonna tell me what’s up? And don’t just stand in the fucking doorway.”
“Sorry,” he mumbled, shutting the door behind him.
Ena moved to sit down on her bed, motioning him to join her, which he did hesitantly.
“What’s wrong?” She asked again, softer this time.
“Its just–” He bit his lip, “Fuck, I don’t even know. I’ve just been feeling like… Kind of weird lately?”
“How so?”
He hesitated again, and she could tell there was some type of bandaid he was trying to rip off.
“I don’t…” He stopped, unsure.
Ena just waited.
“I don’t think I’m a boy,” Akito blurted out.
Ena blinked. She didn’t know what she was expecting, but it wasn’t that.
“Okay,” She said slowly, unsure of how to respond.
“But like…” They put their head in their hands and groaned, “I have no fucking clue what I am.”
“You don’t have to know everything immediately,” Ena said, softly.
“It’s just… I know I’m not a boy, and I don’t want to be a girl either, but I don’t really think I’m like… nonbinary or anything… I just don’t feel like anything, y’know? Nothing fits.”
“You could be like… agender, or genderqueer, or something. Or you could just say fuck labels!”
“I know genderqueer is just the general term, but what does agender mean again?” They asked.
“I’m pretty sure it’s just like… not having a gender.”
“Not having a gender..” Akito repeated slowly, “I think that’s kinda how I feel…”
“Oh, also, what pronouns do you want me to use?”
Akito thought for a moment.
“I think… They/them would be good. But like don’t use that when talking to others, especially not Toya because i have no fucking clue how to tell him, or anyone really-”
“It’ll be fine, Akito. And I won’t tell, promise. But… You know Toya will be fine with it, right? Like I know he won’t give a shit.”
“I know… I just like…” They sighed, “I don’t fucking know. I’m just scared I guess.”
“Yeah, understandable. You can take your time with it, kay?”
Akito gave her a small smile.
“Oh also… Do you think you could like… ask Akiyama to stop calling me Lil’ bro? I’ve tried to but she won’t listen to me… I know she’d probably stop if I actually told her why, but…”
“I can try, although I’m not sure I’ll have much more luck.”
“I mean… You can tell her, if you want. It… might be easier for me… And I don’t really care if your little circle knows, since I only know Akiyama and she’s hardly ever at school anyway, so…”
Ena tilted her head. “You sure?”
They nodded.
“Okay,” She smiled, and then continued hesitantly, “And you know I’m like… here if you need anything… And I’m never saying this again so you better listen now but… I know I haven’t always been the best sister to you, but I still care about you… Even if you are a little shit sometimes,” she punched their arm jokingly.
“Shut the fuck up, If anyone’s a little shit, its you,” Akito said, rolling their eyes and grinning, “Seriously though… Thanks. I didn’t… really know who to talk to about this…”
“Like I said, anytime.”
~⭒☆☽♢☾☆⭑~
After Akito left her room, Ena logged back onto Nightcord and unmuted herself.
“I’m back,” She said.
Kanade mumbled a soft hello, and Mafuyu just hummed in acknowledgment.
“Enanan!” Mizuki exclaimed, “What did Lil’ Bro want?”
“Um, so about that, could you stop with that nickname?” Ena tried.
“Nope! Why, was he complaining about it again? He’s so boring, I swear!”
“Um, kind of? Not just that in particular though…”
“Whatcha mean?”
“Well, that nickname was bothering them a lot, but not really for the reason you think?” Ena hesitated. Should she really be saying this? Akito had asked her to but… it still felt like she was outing them.
“Not for the reason I–” Mizuku went silent for a second.
“Ohhhhhh. Is this, like… a gender thing?”
“Yeah. Akito said it was fine for me to tell you guys– or rather, they wanted me to tell you, but you can’t tell anyone else.”
“Of course not, my lips are sealed,” Mizuki said, “Now I gotta find a new nickname for them, though…” She sighed.
“Also, wait, were you the first person they told? That's so sweet! I knew you two secretly loved each other!”
“Shut the fuck up, asshole.”
“It’s nice that you could help them feel better…” Kanade said, softly.
“Yes, it is..” Mafuyu replied.
Ena smiled to herself. She was glad she’d been able to help Akito.
She certainly regretted being so shitty in the past, and even if they were really annoying sometimes, she was happy she could make up for it, at least a little bit.