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Summary
After two years with Lucifer, Alastor still doubts the love he’s found, due to his inability to be fully intimate. On the final night of a lonely business trip, those insecurities spiral, pushing him toward a reckless attempt to “fix” himself. But the choice he makes leads him into the arms of someone else, and by morning he’s left with nothing but regret, and the unbearable task of confessing everything when he returns home.
Or
Alastor cheats on Lucifer in a drunken moment of self-loathing, but it's not the means to an end he had hoped for. Instead, he hates himself more and is afraid Lucifer will too.