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"..you need to know the truth."
Joyce blinked, a little confused. But Will was the apple of her eye- and right now he was.. distressed. Over what Vecna had showed him. Nightmarish things, she knew, and her sensitive boy was taking it to heart, getting teary and terrified at the thought of whatever it was, becoming true.
"Will... honey, what he showed you isn't real-"
"No, no, mom-" Will interrupted- "what happened in his mind didn't come from him. It came from me. And I- I don't want it to come true, I don't- so I.. I want to tell you the truth."
"Okay." Joyce nodded softly, shifting a little closer to his seat. "I'm here, baby. I'm listening. Tell me."
Will swallowed, breathing shaky, trying to gather his thoughts. "..mom I-"
"Is everything okay-?"
Will gasped, so did Joyce. They both looked up at the sudden interruption-
Mike. He was just standing there awkwardly, realising he'd walked in on a personal conversation.
"Yeah we'll be out in a minute." Joyce replied.
"Okay." Mike nodded and turned to leave-
"Mike." Will stood up quickly.
"Y- Yeah?" Mike turned his head.
"Can.. you send Jonathan in? Please."
"Yeah, of course."
"And- Robin too. No one else." Will swallowed, fiddling with his sleeve like he was worried he demanded too much.
"Sure- sure, I'll let 'em know." Mike gave an automated smile, leaving the room.
-
"Wanted to talk? About what?" Jonathan asked as their footsteps echoed in the hallway.
"Don't know, he didn't say anything more." Mike shrugged, looking at Robin like she'd know something but even she didn't know. But for some reason.. Robin felt like she had an inkling of what Will wanted to say. She glanced at Mike before the older ones stepped into the radio hall.
"You called?" Jonathan asked. "Everything okay?"
"Yeah- I just.. I wanted to talk." Will said softly, his face still flushed from tears beading in his eyes.
"Yeah champ, what's up?" Robin sat down along with Jonathan, Mike still standing in the doorway, waiting to be invited in. Which was odd.. there was a time where Mike would be there for Will without Will having to ask for it. And Will never minded it.
Will took a deep breath and opened his mouth to speak- and was suddenly reminded of Mike's presence in the room. He looked up at Mike, the silence jarring and heavy. So much that the others looked up too.
"Could you- shut the door on your way out?" Will spoke finally.
Mike stared at Will like he just asked for his kidneys.
But he was quick to compose himself, Pretend like he was okay. Like everything was fine after Will didn't allow him to be there. Maybe it really was that personal. So much that he didn't want his best friend to know.
Will didn't miss the way Mike's jaw clenched. The way he looked down at his feet before nodding, like he had to mentally articulate instructions to his feet to step out of there.
"I'll be outside." He said, walking away a little too fast for normal and almost- almost shut the door behind him.
Mike walked out and a little away from there- but then his feet refused to even drag ahead and leave. His heart felt stuck- even though he knew Will didn't want him there. Mike grabbed the water bottle and chugged down some few sips, as if it were some numbing alcohol. Why did it leave a pang in his chest? He wanted to be there. Be there for Will and sit with him through whatever was eating away at him. But.. Will asked him to leave. So he'd leave. He wouldn't go against Will's wishes.
He was too lost in his own thoughts, just standing there ahead and away of the doorway when-
"I don't want you to see me differently... but I want you to know the truth. And the truth is that I.. I am different."
Mike suddenly snapped out of it, having overheard that.
"I am different."
/"what.. don't I understand?"
"That.. I am different. I do not belong."/
Mike's breath hitched in his throat. Will felt.. different? In what sense? The way El felt different? Why didn't Will ever tell him? Maybe Mike could've helped- or maybe.. maybe not. Maybe they weren't that close anymore.
Maybe Mike wasn't that important to Will anymore.
But now Mike couldn't move. He wanted to understand this. He wanted to understand Will. So he just stayed there, near the door, back pressed against the wall.
"I..don't want anyone to see me differently because I am like everyone else- all my friends, you know, D&D nights, arcade nights, and sleepovers, car drives and- everything else." Will spoke, his voice a little wobbly.
"But I.. I realised at some point that I.. I was different. And it- it felt wrong, at first. Felt like I was a.. a mistake."
/"and when you're.. different..sometimes you feel like a mistake."/
"But- but there was a person who made me feel like I wasn't a mistake at all- infact that I was better for being different and- I.. I felt.. I felt so right with this person."
/"but- you don't make her feel like a mistake at all. You make her feel like she's better for being different."/
"Like- like I was just Will. Not broken, or a zombie boy or a freak or anything. I.. realised I had a- a crush on this.. someone.. and I just couldn't see myself with anyone but him."
Him?
"Him-?.." Joyce blurted out before she could even think it over.
"Mom." Will sniffled. "I.. can't see myself with a girl. Any girl."
Mike froze. He stood up a little straighter, processing that. Will liked a boy? Who? Was this someone from lenora when the Byers moved away?
"I thought of him when I had to kill the demogorgons. He gave me strength and I.. I felt.. when I accepted that I had feelings for him..I felt so free and everything made sense. I.. accepted myself. But I can't move on even though I know- he- he isn't like me.."
Because otherwise the only boys Will had been around were the party.. and mostly-
"-and I'm scared I'll ruin what we have if I tell him. I don't want him to be my Tammy. He's just- "
"-Mike?" Jonathan was quick to put it together. And the silence followed by Will's quiet whimper told them all enough.
Even Mike himself.
Will liked a boy... and it was Mike.
Mike caught the gasp in his throat before it left him. He knew he'd hurt Will. But in Will's kind eyes, Mike only ever saw love. The need to be understood. And he'd always looked away because if he looked away, he could just pretend like he didn't see it.
The same way he'd pretended to not see Will crying in the van after he gave Mike the drawing, just to save himself unease. Save himself from looking into his own heart, that was begging to be understood.
He knew they'd grown distant and despite it all-
Mike was the heart. He was Will's heart.
The heart whose walls and vessels were covered with the colours of Will's love.
And the heart also pumped out love for Will.
"But he's not like me. And that's okay... because this- this is about me. I know I am different and... I'm okay this way. I just.. don't want you all to worry about me. This is who I am. I am okay."
Mike could imagine Will's smile. The relief of finally letting it out. He could feel Will's eyes softening, the tears finally giving way and streaming down his rosy cheeks.
"You're still my boy." Mike heard Joyce say with so much love. "You are perfect the way you are... and I love you."
That made Mike tear up, for some reason.
Like that was something even he needed to hear.
That he was still loved even after feeling so lost and misguided. That it was okay to be figuring himself out.
Will always called Mike, 'Mike the Brave.' But the real brave one was Will.. to be so open and brave to tell the truth, accept himself was the bravest thing Mike had seen anyone do.
Because Mike was the best at not being brave for himself. Not listening to himself, not accepting his truth.
But Will's words, they made him feel okay. Like there was still hope he could hold onto, be the brave Knight Will always saw him as.
"You'll always be my little brother." Jonathan sniffled with and hugged him, kissing Will's head as Will sobbed softly in his shoulder. Oh what privilege it was, to feel so relieved that he was crying in his brother's arms.
"I'm proud of you, Will." Robin smiled too, rubbing his back with a teary chuckle. She'd been there once too, scared and unsure. To know she could help Will accept himself was the warmest feeling in the world, to know she could be a safe person for someone so sweet and precious.
And outside, Mike wiped the tears off his own face. Like he always did. Alone but.. he wasn't confused this time. Because he knew how much he wanted to hear it too.
That someone was proud of him.
That he was not anyone's Tammy. He was just Mike.
His Mike.