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“CAW, CAWW, HASHIRA MEETING! UBUYASHIKI MANSION!”
“Shit!” Obanai swore under his breath, frantically climbing out of the water hashira’s futon. Alongside him, Giyuu scrambled out of the bathroom, buttoning up his uniform. The two pillars had splitting headaches from Kanzaburo’s squawking, but despite Obanai telling Tomioka to get a new crow to replace the old one, he wouldn't budge, insisting the old bird could still deliver messages just fine.
Clearly he couldn't. If he could, they would be at the hashira meeting by now. The serpent hashira thought to himself.
After a few minutes of rushing around and planning when to arrive, as not to seem like they were together, they both shrugged on their haoris and ran outside.
At the masters mansion
“Hello master! What brings us here today?” Shinobu questioned sweetly. Ubuyashiki smiled at her kindly and replied, “nothing much dear Kocho, we are just here to discuss some matters related to patrolling.” The insect pillar nodded and sat down in her regular spot. Shinauzugawa and Uzui were deep in conversation, talking about how they sharpened their swords, when suddenly Obanai walked in. All the hashira did double takes, Mitsuri covering her mouth trying not to giggle, Tengen's jaw in the lowest ring of Satan's ass crack, and Sanemi flabbergasted beyond comprehension.
Obanai was wearing Giyuu's haori, that much was apparent. Nobody knew why but they saw it. Hell, even Sanemi’s colourblind ass can see it. Iguro on the other hand looked confused on why everyone was staring at him suddenly, had his bandages fallen off? He decided to ignore it and sit down.
“Well shit this just got interesting.” Tengen said, bemused upon the situation, grinning from ear to ear. Shinobu's brows furrowed at his voice, knowing whatever was going to come out of his mouth next would be either freaky, or annoying, or both.
Obanai looked at him with confusion, his eyebrow raised slightly, when Tengen just smirked, he rolled his heterochromic eyes and looked at the master, who was smiling knowingly.
“Seriously what the fuck is with you all today?” He asked them all, looking around at his fellow pillars. Then suddenly the other problem walks in, completing the hashira. Both him and the serpent pillar lock eyes for a moment, and realise their mistake with horror on their faces. They had switched haoris
Silence suffocated the hashira, the only noise being Tengen stifling his laughter. Eventually Tengen decided to speak up, “so, Did you two…?” He asked, his eyebrows raised higher than Rengoku’s soul. Obanai took a frantic glance at Sanemi, only to see his death glare, and betrayed look.
Giyuu spoke up, answering Tengen’s question, “No, we did not have sex.” Iguro looked as if he was ready to join his older brother in heaven. Meanwhile Tengen was wheezing his ass off at Giyuu’s bluntness, while all the other pillars (other than Sanemi) were shocked and amused at this pairing.
“Then why are you wearing each other's haoris?” Mitsuri questioned between giggles, Obanai wanted to crawl into a hole and die. The two gays thought for an excuse for a few moments, until Obanai spoke up. “We just got back from an overnight mission where we had to stay at an inn, it seems we mistakenly put on each other's haoris while we were leaving for the meeting.”
A lie of course, the serpent and water pillar had been sleeping together for months now. I mean literally sleeping together, like sleeping sleeping. They both had regular nightmares, and sleeping in the same room helped them both greatly.
At that moment, master Kagaya decided to step in, “I'm sorry my child, but that is false information. I have not sent either of you on a mission in the last few days.” Tengen and Mitsuri burst out laughing, while Obanai and Giyuu stared at the floor in shame.
“You traitor.” The wind hashira said quietly, betrayal seeping into his voice. “Shinauzugawa it's not what it looks like I swear-” “shush. I don't want to hear it.”
“Let's just forget this happened.” Giyuu spoke, taking off Obanai’s haori. One they had swapped back, they both sat. Next to each other I might add, which didn't help with the glances and smirks the other hashira were giving them.
Later, at the water estate
“GIYUU YOU DUMB FUCK.”