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Leo wasn’t good at sharing.
Since he was an only child he never had to even learn. His parents gave him everything he asked for, all their love and affections and Leo never had to learn how to do without the constant giving he received. As a child he was happy this way, always carrying his toys around proudly, knowing nothing can take them away.
When he got into elementary school and his teacher noticed how he doesn’t play well with others, he got analyzed. The grown people who talked to him came to a conclusion – he was a genius. It explained why he was interested in sciences, subjects only a few kids his age took interest in.
As it appeared, his life calling was tangled right where those grownups analyzed him. None of his classmates wanted to talk about the Brainiac things he constantly went on and on about, and he liked that this subject, like his toys, was all his. It became a little less his when he entered the academy, but his parents congratulated him and he was happy to see so much pride in their eyes.
Even amongst kids like him, he was different. They straggled with subjects he understood quite well, and it came as a relief to know he was still special at something.
That is, until one Jemma Simmons came crashing into his life.
He still remembered how the teacher introduced her to the class, how she smiled so impossibly wide at everyone. She was always kind, and positive, and a little different then Leo. When the teacher paired them for a project, Leo honestly had no feelings about it. He didn’t consider Jemma as a better or worse possibility then the rest; she was all the same as them.
Still, when he looked back at this now, Leo could kick himself for not noticing just how different Jemma was to him. They worked together and it took some adjustments for them to fit well against each other, but when they found each other’s bumps and gave it a try, it almost blew Leo’s mind, what a well-oiled machine they became.
That lowly project became history as it marked the beginning of their friendship. They were inseperateable since, always together, working together, finishing each other’s sentences. They could see how it made others slightly uncomfortable in their presence, but honestly, they found their place in the world, sharing smiles and enthusiasm in the warmth of their comfort zone.
It wasn’t quite enough for Leo, though. He wanted to prove himself more, farther then where he could reach within the lad. He wanted action, to be a part of something bigger. That’s how they got on Colson’s team, because of him. Jemma came after him, he was her place after all, and they had to be together.
Leo’s feelings only became stronger when he dragged Jemma closer to danger, when they were a part of a team that felt almost like a family. The bad times didn’t arrive until they got crossed. Leo said important words straight from the heart when they were trapped together on the bottom of the ocean, and he knew deep inside that they couldn’t possibly be enough to say everything he felt since he helped a ginger child build the best project kids their age every saw. He blew up glass and gave himself uncorrectable damage, only so she could survive. So her smile wouldn’t fade.
They made it through that trouble too, even though Leo was being a dick the entire time. Jemma went undercover, came back, got complicated with him again until they just let go of all the bad feelings they had for each other, reaching out just to feel the new bumps that formed along the way.
Leo even asked her out if you could believe it. He really did. Maybe he tripped, but Jemma just smiled back and watched him walk away. She didn’t get to catch him jumping around will glee as he waited for the evening to arrive, just like Leo didn’t get to save her from a portal no one knew about.
He still felt guilty.
For the six months that followed, he looked for ways to get to her. Jemma was always on his mind, when he woke up, when he went to bed, when he breathed and the heartache returned. Jemma was always there. He whispered her name when no one heard, over and over again so it won’t feel foreign on his lips, not even for one second. He put himself in danger, wracked his brain to shreds. He could see how the other SHIELD agents looked at him, how they asked him to stop and accept, how they tried mending him from the pitch black pit he fell into without her.
But they couldn’t, they weren’t Jemma. Only she could save him.
He chased lead after lead, running everything down so he could find his one and only beloved. They found a lead that held, they found the portal, and Leo never thought twice before jumping in there, screaming the name he only dared to whisper before from the top of his lungs.
She screamed back.
He pulled her back and saved her, her mere presence saving him right back.
Getting her used to being on earth again looked like a hard task at the time, she just cried when Leo tried his best, she didn’t tell him things, didn’t share with him the new bumps that formed on her heart, even though she always used to before. Leo held on, fighting to figure out what was wrong, what was holding Jemma back. Like she did for him when his head wasn’t right.
Leo pushed to find answers and when Jemma finally told him what happened to her out there, he wished he didn’t. He wished he stayed in the lab with her. He wished to be her only place in this world, even though he knew he wasn’t anymore.
And he helped her get her new home back.
It took getting his brain wracked again, his heart right along with it as Jemma searched for a man that made her heart beat just like Leo did. She kept saying how they were the same to her, how this doesn’t change her loving Leo back just the way he loved her.
But if they were the same, Leo had to share. And clearly, he didn’t know how to.
When Will finally stepped foot on earth, he pulled Jemma closer and kissed her right in front of Leo’s eyes. His actions seemed so normal, like they were rehearsed many times before. So was Jemma’s reaction. The only thing different were the shattering sounds in Leo’s head.
He ran away, of course. Not far, but just out of reach because the one time he was in the same room with Jemma she looked at him with that look, the one she had when he was broken. Like he still was broken, like she broke him.
The thing was, Leo loved Jemma enough to want to learn how to share. He wanted to; he wanted them to be them again more than anything. He wanted her to look at him with the same warmth she looked at Will.
He just wasn’t good at sharing.
A hand brushed his shoulder and Leo jumped, eyes darting behind him to catch the eyes of the person he wanted to see least. Will gave him the most unsure look he could, dropping his hand down as he saw the reaction to his presence wasn’t good. “Hey.”
“Hey? The first word you exchange with me is Hey?” Leo took a step back, all his defences rising tall above his fragile heart. “Like we’re acquaintances?”
“Okay, maybe hey was wrong,” Will raised one hand in surrender in front of him, the other wiping at his eyes. “Can I try again?”
Leo frowned his eyebrows, and waited. Just waited.
“It’s been three months since I came back, and whenever you saw me coming you ran away,” Will explained, pausing to clear his throat. “I’m just nervous to finally corner you.”
“Cornering me implies I’m a helpless being. Like a mouse,” Leo informed him, crossing his arms on his chest as he tried staring the other guy down.
“No, that’s not what I meant,” Will sighed and shook his head. When his eyes returned to meet with Leo’s again, they made it very clear Leo wasn’t even able to stare this guy down. “I wanted to thank you. I heard you helped Jemma in getting me back, and I know how hard that must have been for you.”
Leo couldn’t stand looking at this man anymore, deciding it was best to turn his back on his intruder. He watched data flying across the screen, the program he built working hard at finding other inhumens they could help. Somehow, Leo wished someone could help him too.
“Look, I know about you and Jemma.” Leo heard a step being taken towards him, his entire body stiffening as they kept growing nearer to him. “I don’t want to get in the way of that.”
“You don’t want to get in the way of that by kissing her?” Leo spat out, turning around in the worst moment as Will took his last step, physically caging Leo against the table behind him.
“I know you’re like Jemma,” Will started, leaning forward to add his arms as another barrier to his cage, leaving Leo no place to run. “So I’ll say this as some kind of a math problem. You could solve it, right, Fitz?” Leo only swallowed, eyes darting around, looking anywhere but at the other man. “Jemma loves you. Jemma also loves me. You love Jemma, and I do too. That’s two strong ribs of a triangle, right?”
Leo could feel the pain in his chest again, and he tried pushing against Will, hoping to get him far enough to just breathe.
“Jemma is unhappy without you by her side,” Will informed him and in the split second Leo dared to meet his eyes, he saw sincerity in them. He knew Will wanted to do good here, and it didn’t settle with him well, especially when he threw a problem he’s been tearing himself down with for the last three months.
“What do you want.” Leo’s tone was even, pushing his feelings deep inside in front of a complete stranger.
“To make a triangle,” Will whispered and Leo stood paralyzed as he watched the other man lean towards him, getting closer and closer until he felt the warmth of another set of lips on top of his own. It lasted a little over a moment, in which Will’s quick hand already found comfort laying on Leo’s hip. The moment ended and Will pulled back just a little, looking deep into Leo’s eyes from such a short distance Leo felt like he was losing the ability to breath.
They waited for a moment, both unsure and afraid of making a bad move. Will’s hand, the one not on Leo’s hip, rose to hold Leo’s face, his thumb running across cheekbone. He sounded a soft chuckle before he leaned in again, this time holding Leo in place to leave a bigger impact, the second kiss holding no place for error about his intentions.
When Will pulled back a second time, Leo had to take a deep breath and hold the table behind him as support.
“If you want to, we could be a triangle,” Will said again, the look in his eyes more warm and inviting then what you would expect of a man who’s been though what he’s been though.
It downed to Leo was he looked into that look, this man has been through so much worse than Jemma, and Leo saw how bad it was on her. This human being in front of him had to resort down to being an animal for fourteen years. This man probably needed a sun after all the darkness he’s been though, and Jemma was perfect for him.
Just like she was for him.
Will moved towards the exit, away from Leo who finally felt like he could breathe again. A noise startled him and Leo’s eyes shot to the door, catching Jemma’s slightly alarmed face. She smiled at him when he looked at her, of course, and Leo read her face like a map he knew by heart. She was afraid, and somehow still hopeful, as she took the hard Will offered her and let him pass her into the hallway. Will stopped and waited, Jemma looked at Leo and waited, and Leo still couldn’t find words to form.
“Fitz,” he heard her voice for up close for the first time since Will’s lips met the ones who formed it. “We want this. I want this, I want you,” she paused, giving him that smile she always had on when she knew all she had to say would probably be better off unsaid at this point of time. Leo could see her free hand flinching, maybe with the need to hold his own. “If you want this too, please come find us. You could come to us, and stay, Leo. There’s plenty of room for you.”
With that said, Jemma turned and pulled Will by the hand she held out of there, leaving him in his own silence for a while. The detector behind him beeped in signal of the presence it found, and Leo felt like his heart might be beeping too.
After all, Leo wasn’t good at sharing. He never needed to learn. A smile spread on his lips as he lifted fingertips to gently brush against his parted lips.
Maybe with Jemma and Will’s help, he could grow to be quite good at it.