Chapter Text
In a hospital room, mere days into the new year, a comatose man's fingers begin twitching.
Clear across the city there stands a man his age, with dark hair dyed green, on the very edge of the tallest building in town.
And there isn’t much Derek can do in a coma.
He can only watch through Avery’s eyes as he looks down at the asphalt below, hearing his new friend’s thoughts play in his own ears, with nothing he can do to stop them.
There are sirens blaring as police try to talk him down from the ledge. It almost doesn’t reach Avery’s ears at all.
It’s my fault, Avery is thinking. Derek tries to disagree, but Avery can’t hear him.
If I had been a little faster, The man screws his eyes shut. Just a little faster, and maybe I could have saved you.
It wouldn’t have mattered, Derek thinks. It still would have ended this way.
Avery’s eyes open and his footing gets unsteady. There are tears forming now.
“I’m sorry, Derek.” He whispers out loud, to no one but himself. “I just can’t do it. I’m not… I’m not you. I’m not smart like you are.”
He starts to lean forward.
“I’m nothing.” He breathes, an eerie image of that wretched book flashing in his mind.
Derek tries to cry out.
For Avery, time seems to slow. Derek feels every impossibly long moment as Avery slowly loses his balance, slowly leans towards the asphalt that waits beneath, slowly accepts his own death.
It’s right when he’s straddling the point of no return when another image flashes through Avery’s mind.
The signs Derek left for him, in that world with the cathedral.
Words Derek stands by. Words he’d say in person if he had the chance, and if his body would only cooperate.
You are real.
You are special.
Remember who you are.
Avery all but throws himself back, his shoulder hitting the concrete of the rooftop hard. He’s breathing fast and heavy, even as he rolls onto his back to stare up at the sky.
He told me to keep moving forward.
Yes!
I can’t give up. Not after everything he did for me.
Derek wishes in that moment that Avery knew he was alive. He wishes he could tell him somehow– speak to him.
But no, this form of knowledge only works in one direction.
Still, he clings to Avery’s mind, to his thoughts, if only because it’s the only comfort he has through all the pain.
Avery is barely paying attention as the police and his mother climb through the building to reach him, as his mother wraps her arms around him and holds him close. Avery’s mind is far from all that. It had been ever since New Year’s Eve.
Avery hasn’t opened that wretched laptop ever since that day, and in fact, it had been flung out the window in a fit of rage and grief and sorrow. He was hardly eating, barely sleeping, not even looking at his phone. He couldn’t bring himself to check his messages, much less the news.
It broke Derek’s heart.
In the hospital room, his muscles jerk, and his mother runs to get a doctor.
Avery’s mother brings him to her car, her son never saying a word. Not until the doors are shut and locked and they’re driving away.
“‘m sorry.” Avery mutters. For a long time, his mom doesn’t respond.
Her hands are shaking as she grips the wheel, knuckles white with the force.
“…Why?” is all she says in response. Avery’s eyes close.
“I… don’t think you’ll believe me if I tell you.”
He’s not entirely wrong, of course. She’d never believe the whole story. But a toned-down version might be enough.
“Try me.” She challenges, tears in her eyes.
Avery sits and thinks for a long moment, trying to figure out how to phrase it.
“The whole thing still… scares me.” He says. “But the short version is… I was playing Minecraft with a new friend. He started saying some things in the chat that really scared me. He told me his name. And said he was gonna die. And then he stopped replying and went AFK.”
There’s a long moment of silence.
“And… he told me enough details that I know what happened. And it feels like it’s my fault. He was– he was really kind. To me. When he really didn’t need to be. And I… maybe if I was just a little faster…”
“It wasn’t your fault, kiddo. Whatever happened, it wasn’t your fault.” His mom tells him.
Avery curls away, staring out the window. He doesn’t believe her. Derek wishes it could be that easy.
They don’t talk at all for the rest of the drive to Avery’s apartment.
It’s hours later, and Derek’s sister is booting up Derek’s computer, which he didn’t have password locked, given that he lived alone.
OBS was left open, as was the word document holding his message to Avery.
She brings a hand to their mouth and she tears up as she reads it.
She lets out a sob.
Derek feels guilty for only a moment, but if he never wakes up, he’d be happy for his last mark on the world to be those words.
Avery takes out his phone, finally checking his discord messages, and Derek’s heart starts beating faster, sending nurses into a frenzy.
Ladyluck: sorry I haven’t been online. my brother went into a coma on new years day and we’ve all been freaking out. I’m probably not gonna be willing to play for a while.
She had sent that message to their online friend, Thatmostmayo, two days ago, not knowing that Avery knew their brother.
Ladyluck: my brother left this on his computer. I had to tell someone– sorry for disappearing.
She sent him an image taken on their phone of Derek’s goodbye message.
Avery let out a dry sob at the image.
Thatmostmayo: is
Thatmostmayo: is your brother named derek by any chance
Ladyluck is typing…
Thatmostmayo: username d3rlord3?
Thatmostmayo: i ask because
Thatmostmayo: well
Thatmostmayo: we played minecraft together. on new years.
Thatmostmayo: my name is Avery.
Ladyluck is typing…
Ladyluck: holy shit
Thatmostmayo: so hes
Thatmostmayo: i mean
Thatmostmayo: hes alive?
Ladyluck is typing…
Thatmostmayo: i just ask because he disappeared really suddenly and
Ladyluck: we live in the same city right?
Ladyluck sent a location
Ladyluck: do you want to come visit him?
Thatmostmayo: yes
And with only a few words to his mom, Avery is in his car driving as quickly as he can without breaking any traffic laws (though he ran a few stop signs) to get to Derek.
It’s, thankfully, an easy process getting into his room, thanks to Derek’s sister calling ahead to let them know to let Avery through. The receptionist had been very sweet, telling him exactly where the room is.
Every step Avery takes towards the room is hours long. It terrifies him, on some level– to be so close to the man that saved his life.
The moment the door openes and Avery sees Derek for the first time, something in him shatters.
His sister hasn’t arrived yet. She doesn’t see Avery break down.
He stumbles to Derek’s bedside, tears welling up in his eyes. Derek wishes he was awake so he could comfort him.
Avery clutches Derek’s hand, collapsed on the floor, laying his head against the bed. He sobs, clinging to him like a lifeline– like if he let go, Derek would disappear.
He wants so badly to see him with his own eyes.
He knows what Avery looks like, of course, he knows it well. But knowing is a different kind of thing than seeing. He knew Avery would follow him. It still managed to surprise him when it did.
He knew Avery’s hand would be warm. It didn’t prepare him for feeling it.
Avery’s voice– even in tears, muttering nonsense apologies and desperate pleas– is beautiful. He feels his muscles relax at the sound of it, at the mere fact that he’s there.
He had clung desperately to his knowledge of Avery that day, the same way he still does now, as a balm to soothe the pain. He kept what was left of his mind on the man that had tried so hard to save him while the rest of it tore itself to shreds, all to destroy the King. His mind feels intact, but he knows it isn’t. He knows there are things he’d forgotten, things he’d never remember, things he still knows regardless. He knows his mind will never be able to operate at the speed it once had, thanks to the constant onslaught of sheer information.
He knows something now, though, that he hadn’t known then.
He has a future.
It had been that laser-focus on Avery, beautiful, perfect, human Avery that had kept some part of his mind in tact. It’s thanks to him, though he doesn’t know it, that Derek has a future at all.
He had looked out at the fireworks, lamenting over how he’d never see them again.
Now he will.
And he hopes he’ll get to see them with Avery beside him.
Avery sobs out Derek’s name, and he starts pushing his way forward in the void of nothingness he called a brain, desperate to finally wake up.
His hand twitches first, tightening around Avery’s, who looks up hesitantly.
Then his eyes flutter open.
Seeing is so different from knowing.
He knows Avery– know shim better than Avery knows himself. He knew Avery was beautiful.
It still blows his mind when he sees him.
Avery’s face lights up in a smile, tears still staining his cheeks. He looks like the very sun– so bright and beautiful and burning and Derek has no idea how he could possibly have ever lived without him.
His hand tightens a little more.
“Hi, Avery.” Derek whispers, voice hoarse from lack of use, chapped, cracking lips spreading into a smile.
“You’re alive…!” Avery sobs, bringing a hand to his mouth. “You’re alive!”
“Yeah.” Derek chuckles. “I’m alive.”
Avery very nearly collapses on top of him, but hesitates, not knowing if he can—
“Can I hug you?” Derek interrupts his worrying. He usually wasn’t a hugging sort of person, but–
Avery gently, gingerly, wraps his arm around Derek, trying not to hurt him, and the warmth alone might have been enough to make him cry if he was awake enough for it. Derek can’t move one of his arms– or, well, he could, but it would fuck up the IV– and he doesn’t want to let go of Avery’s hand. He settles for rubbing a thumb across his knuckles instead.
“I’m… really happy to see you.” Derek says as Avery pulls away, failing to encapsulate the whole of what he felt. Happy doesn’t truly even begin to cover it. He’s not sure he could put it into words, but if he has to try, he’ll choose elated.
“…Yeah.” Avery agrees, having a similar conundrum. “I– uh, I should probably go tell someone you’re awake, actually–”
“Just press that button. It calls a nurse. I’m…” He takes a deep breath. “I’m not ready for you to leave yet.”
Avery all but melts, and he shifts to press the button.
“Um…” he bites at his lip and reaches to grab a chair, which he had pushed out of the way when he came in. “Are you– I mean, is he…?”
“No. The King’s gone. It’s just me now. Or, well. What’s left of me.” His eyes slip shut, basking in the warmth of Avery’s mere presence. “Still hurts like hell, though.”
Avery opens his mouth to speak, to apologize, but he’s interrupted by the nurse coming in.
She;s surprised to see Derek awake. They weren’t expecting him to wake up at all.
He offers a wave.
She turns around to go get a doctor, forgetting to say anything at all.
“Oh! I-I should, uh, tell your sister you’re awake. Um– she gave me the address–”
“I know, Avery.” Derek smiles.
“Right. Yeah. You still…”
He nods.
Avery doesn’t know what else to say, so he focuses his attention onto messaging Derek’s sister– who he’s realizing he doesn’t know the name of. He’d just been calling her ‘Lucky’, and she called him ‘Mayo’, even when they met up at a local con.
Whatever.
Thatmostmayo: hes awake
The doctor is about to come in, and he’s going to kick Avery out. Derek doesn’t want him to, but there’s nothing he was going to be able to do.
“Come back tomorrow?” He asks, letting some of his emotion seep through into his words.
Avery tears up again and nods. “I promise.”