Chapter Text
All had been good, all had been swell. That is until Tsukasa sensed something in the trees near where they had set up their moth lamp. When a figure stepped out of the woods everybody panicked, excluding Senku who took one look at the figure and cursed so loudly the others all paused in their panicking and turned to look at him. "Fuck no. Back to the lab and boat. Back to the lab and boat. Move you dumb asses, we are going back to Japan."
Everyone was confused but followed orders all while the figure dressed in some kind of gilly suit calmly walked after them. "Ishigami Senku." They all heard the voice as they climbed into their respect vehicles. Senku pales and looks at Ryuusui with what looks like a panicked face.
"Step on the fucking gas."
Ryuusui does just that. The others are confused and alarmed when Senku turns around and races up the ladder to stick his head, shoulders, and hands out the top of the moving vehicle to flip the figure, growing smaller by the minute, off.
"Uh, what was that about?" Chrome asks, looking at Senku and then towards where they just were.
"A fucking nightmare that has been haunting me since my father made a stupid decision when I was 12." Senku says with a grave look on his face.
"Uh, Senku-chan, that doesn't give us any context." Gen says, wondering if Senku had finally gone completely insane.
"If he's awake the other one must be too. Fuck. Am I ever going to be free of them?" Senku starts talking to himself and everyone feels slightly unnerved. Turning to the others he levels them with a serious look. "That was one of my father's boyfriends." This shocks everyone. "Yes I know, I know. Completely horrible, and the worst decision my father ever made."
"Are you homophobic, Senku-chan?" Gen suddenly blurts, and Senku looks at him like he just asked if the sky was actually there.
"No? Why would you think that? Oh, I don't care that my father was dating two dudes at all. It's just the two dudes in question that I have a problem with." Senku suddenly understands what he said might have sounded like. Several people sigh in relief at that. Senku absolutely does not make eye contact with any of them.
"Were they abusive or anything?" Tsukasa asks, worrying the worst kind of people had woken up by themselves.
"Worse." Senku says with a shiver. "They were nice."
Everyone goes silent at that and share a look with each other. Taiju finally connects the right dots and perks up.
"Was that Mr. Stanley?" He asks excitedly. Senku pales at the name and rushes over to put a hand over Taiju's mouth.
"Shhhhh, he could hear you." Senku says, looking around the mobile lab as if expecting the figure, now dubbed Mr. Stanley, to crawl out from one of the shadows. "None of us ever speak of this again. We turn around, go back to Japan, and grow what we already have. I am not getting any closer to those two. Nuh uh, no way. You can't make me."
"Uh, Senku-chan, what's so wrong with them being nice?" Gen asks, feeling that Senku may have actually lost it this time.
"Everything." Senku says in answer, acting like a man heading for the gallows. Everyone blinks at him, not understanding one bit why that might be a problem.
"But, Senku, you haven't seen your dads in such a long time." Taiju says and Senku hisses like a cat.
"Not my dads." Senku spits, looking like he was going to set the world on fire.
"You're still doing that huh?" Taiju asks, looking bemused. "They practically helped raise you after they started dating Byakuya."
"Wait, are the ones you're talking about the people Byakuya mentioned in the message he left in the recording?" Chrome suddenly asks, looking at Senku. Senku glares at Chrome before putting his hand on Chrome's mouth instead.
" We don't talk about that part of the message." Senku says, looking haunted.
Chrome gasps around Senku's hand. "It totally is!" Senku glares at him. "They are the ones Byakuya told you to find and listen to!" Senku's glare could've melted glass.
"No." Senku says like a petulant child. Taiju snickers at Senku's behavior and wraps an arm around him pulling him towards himself.
"Come on Senku, you could at least say hi to them." Taiju says, grinning when Senku pales and shakes his head. Senku squirms and tries to escape Taiju's grasp, but he fails.
"Unhand me so I may run away again and never see them again. For all I know Xeno has totally become an evil dictator and Stanley is his right hand man." Senku says, biting Taiju's arm in hopes of escaping. It feels like a tickle to Taiju. "I am not joining their idea of a new world. No way, you can't make me."
"There's no way Xeno's become an evil dictator." Taiju says grinning down at Senku. Senku just levels him with an unimpressed stare. "Ok, there's a possibility Xeno has become an evil dictator, but they still helped raise you."
"Nuh uh, I ran- went back to Japan for a reason. I am not dealing with Stanley's mother henning again god damnit. He always pulled me away from my projects. The only tolerable one between the two of them was Xeno, and that was only when he was sleep deprived and focused on his projects." Senku hisses clawing at Taiju's arm.
"I am so lost. What is happening?" Kohaku asks from the speed boat. Everyone besides the two arguing agree with Kohaku.
"Ah, Senku is just throwing another hissy fit at having to see Byakuya's boyfriends again. For some reason he never liked them. They pretty decent guys though, maybe a bit strict at times." Taiju explains finally letting Senku go, who immediately rushed over to the chemicals he has stored in the mobile lab laughing manically.
"Should we stop him?" Chrome asks, a little worried that Senku might actually be planning something like murder. Taiju just shakes his head smiling.
"Nah, let him tire himself out. Ryuusui, keep a lookout. Mr. Stanley's probably going to be hunting us down now that he knows his son is with us." Taiju says. That causes the others to look at him questioningly. 'Not his son' comes Senku's voice from the work bench where he was mixing various chemicals.
"Hunting?" Tsukasa asks, looking around suddenly for a threat he couldn't see. Taiju nods his head sagely.
"Yes, hunting. You think Senku is crazy? Wait till you meet the guys who helped raise him. One of them, Xeno, was a known scientist. The other, Stanley, was a military man. Nice guys as I said earlier, but there's a reason Senku is a bit unhinged. No matter how much he denies it, they definitely rubbed off on him." Taiju's speech is interrupted by the sharp crack of a gun.
"That bitch is shooting at my baby." Senku says suddenly, standing up and running towards the roof access again. Taiju sighs and stops the others from trying to stop Senku. The others panic at the sound of the gun.
"Don't worry, if Stanley wanted us dead we already would be. He's most likely playing with Senku." Taiju explains grinning. The others wonder if Taiju's gone insane as well.
"Your aim is ass!" Senku screams into the forests around them, flipping off the general direction he thinks Stanley is in. "Maybe you should have picked a better career with that aim."
"Your father never complained about it in bed!" A voice yells out from the forest and Senku gags. He flips the disembodied voice off again before retreating back into the lab. Several people freeze at what they just heard. Then Ryuusui starts cackling.
"I thought you said they were nice?" Ryuusui wheezes, talking to Senku. Senku looks mortified and ready to murder someone. Then he pauses and blinks at Ryuusui.
"Hm? What would make you think otherwise?" Senku asks tilting his head like an intrigued bird. Ryuusui wheezes at that and the lab starts to zig zag through the water as he laughs. "Steady you idiot, we have to escape before he gets bored. Or, god forbid, Xeno tells him to grab me."
"I think we all have different versions of what nice means, Senku-chan." Gen says carefully, ignoring what had said after answering Ryuusui's question. Taiju blinks then starts laughing too.
" Oh my God. I forgot you guys aren't used to Stanley yet. That is him being nice. Wait- have any of you heard the speedboat behind us at all in the past five minutes?" Taiju asks, peeking out one of the lab's windows. Senku suddenly realizes the boat is gone and turns red.
"That bastard! He knows Xeno didn't get to hostage situations in my take over the world lessons yet! How dare he use this against me." The others freeze at Senku's words, including Taiju.
"Your what lessons?" Chrome asks, looking a little pale. Senku puts his finger over Chrome's lips to shush him.
"Shush loyal apprentice, we will get there in due time. I am not as naive as Xeno as to start you on that path while you are still so young." Senku says. Chrome fears for his life. Taiju blinks at Senku connecting several dots in his head.
"You are so much like Xeno it scares me sometimes." Taiju says and Senku looks highly offended at the very thought of being like Xeno.
"I am nothing like that pompous ass hole. The only reasons I humored his lessons was to extract information from him. His knowledge was simply to elegant to pass up." Senku says, turning his back on Taiju. "Ryuusui, turn around. If we don't go back soon enough Stanley might start telling his mom stories again." Both Senku and Taiju shiver at that.
"Mom stories?" Gen asks, and Senku shivers again. Senku shakes his head and places a hand on Gen's shoulder.
"Never, ever, ask Stanley about his stories. He turns each and every single one of them into a three hour lecture about life and street smarts. Once he starts, you cannot leave. He won't let you." Senku says with a haunted look in his eyes. "Byakuya loved them for some reason. Always asked Stanley to tell them."
Taiju nods in agreement with a single tear falling from his eye. Gaining a new fear for their friends, Ryuusui quickly turns the lab around in hopes of saving them from such torture.
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The scene they come upon is thankfully not one of Stanley starting one of his famous mom stories, instead it is much worse. It's Stanley showing drawings of Senku's preteen photos of when he first met him on small pieces of paper he somehow has with him. Senku was going to kill him.
From inside the mobile lab of course. "Stanley. Put those things away." Senku hisses from the roof access of the mobile lab. Stanley pauses in his showing of the pictures to turn and look at him.
"Ah, the little brat returns at last." Stanley says grinning up at Senku. "Have you finished having your tantrum yet?" Senku scowls at the man. Taiju pops up beside Senku in the square hole, and waves at Stanley. "Hey kid." Stanley says in reply to the wave.
"Stop that Taiju." Senku scolds, trying to push Taiju back into the mobile lab. He fails and gives up, turning back to Stanley. "Unhand my friends cretin. Or you shall rue the day you went against me."
"You never told us you knew how to shoot a gun Senku!" Ginro calls out from where he's looking at a drawn picture of a grinning Senku with a gun in his hand. Stanley glances down at it and smiles. Senku shudders at the sight.
Taking out a spyglass he looks at the picture and pouts. "That is not what I looked like." He says firmly. "I looked absolutely nothing like that when we were doing the 'family bonding' Byakuya forced me to do. Your memory seems to have left you as well."
Stanley doesn't dignify that with a response. "Alright Senku, time to go see Xeno."
"No." Senku says, glaring at Stanley. Stanley sighs and takes out a cigarette and lights it. Senku lip twitches in disgust at the smell. "It seems your addiction stuck around at least. Byakuya would be sad."
Stanley let's out yet another sigh, this one sounding a hundred times more tired. "Senku, get out of the lab."
Senku freezes, then pokes his head out a little more. "You're not my dad." He says like he's won some battle. Taiju sighs and settles into his seat, the others in the lab follow his example.
"This'll be entertaining. Francois, do we have any popcorn? Wait, never mind we just got corn. Ugh, this would have been more enjoyable with it." Taiju looks a little sad before he quiets so he can hear the conversation the two are having.
"Get out of the fucking lab, I am your dad." Stanley says, tapping his foot on the bank where he stands.
"You're not my dad!" Senku says before ducking back into the lab.
"I am your dad, get out of the fucking lab." Stanley shouts at the lab, and Senku pokes his head back out like a weasel.
"I'm in a lab and you're not." Senku taunts, grinning madly like a toddler with a stolen prize.
"Hey, I will call Xeno. Get out of the fucking lab." Stanley threatens already reaching for his communicator. Senku scoffs at the threat. The others on the bank with Stanley watch the conversation like a tennis match. Looking back and forth between the two.
"I'm literally in a lab and you're not." Senku says without a hint of fear in his voice. Stanley looks like he's getting more and more irritated with this situation as it goes on.
"Get out of the lab." Stanley repeats.
"You're not my dad." Senku says before sinking back into the lab.
"Literally get out of the lab, it looks like you haven't slept in days." Stanley tries again and Senku's head pops out again at the challenge he perceived in Stanley's voice.
"Tell Xeno on me, I don't give a fuck!" Senku gleefully tells Stanley. "And I haven't slept in a solid four days for your information." He says it like it's a good thing, but everyone around him pales at the information. The last time Senku didn't sleep for an extended period of time he almost convinced all the village children that he was a god and that they should start a revolution against everyone else so they could put Senku in complete control.
Gen had stopped him before to much damage was done, but he did see the children on occasion giving Senku offerings. "Get out of the fucking lab!" Stanley shouts at Senku.
"No." Is all Senku says this time. That seems to be the final straw as Stanley suddenly leaps across the water and onto the mobile lab right next to Senku. Senku of course looks like a startled cat at the sudden movement. Stanley grabs Senku by the back of his tunic and pulls him up like a scuffed kitten.
"Put me down you overgrown muppet." Senku hisses, looking even more like a cat. Stanley only stares down at him unimpressed.
"No. Misbehaving children get air jail." Stanley says, hopping back onto the shore with Senku in his grip. Senku wiggles with all his might, but it does nothing to dislodge Stanley's grip. Stanley only raises a single eyebrow. The others, besides Taiju, wonder if they should intervene.
Stanley turns and starts walking away, swinging Senku over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. Senku takes to flailing in Stanley's grip like a rabid animal. Stanley only adjusts his grip and continues walking. "Follow. Don't follow. Don't care, just don't fall behind if you do follow."
"I am not a child, you lazy misbegotten son of a fucking dick sucking octopus." Senku curse as he flails in Stanley's hold. Glaring at everything and everyone as he is held easily despite his flailing.
"Then stop acting like one." Is all Stanley says as he continues walking.
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In the end they separated into two groups. One went back to the ship with a patched speedboat and the mobile lab. The others followed after Stanley and a cursing Senku. At some point Senku gets tired of flailing and starts verbally writing poems about how much Stanley sucks.
Stanley doesn't say anything, just laughing on occasion at a particularly clever poem Senku says. Ryuusui breaks the rhythm by asking Senku a question.
"So is Stanley single or...?" Instant disgust appears on Senku's face. Stanley stumbles a little when he hears the question.
"What the fuck are you talking about? Why would you- No. No way. Ryuusui, what is wrong with you?" Senku asks, glaring from where he is laid on Stanley's shoulder. "First, Stanley has Xeno. Second, that's weird, he's too old for you."
"It's not like that! I was just wondering because it seemed, from what you told us, they were dating your father and not each other." Ryuusui says, panicking slightly. Senku's disgust doesn't go away at all, but he sighs and pulls at Stanley's hair. The man grunts in question.
"You explain it." Senku demands, kicking his legs to try and piss Stanley off. Stanley sighs.
"Xeno would do a better job at it. If anything, it was his plan. We're almost there anyway, so he can explain when we get there." Senku doesn't protest the answer, but he doesn't look happy about it either.
Turning around a bend in the trees the others get a look at a giant castle sitting before a body of water. Seeing the others reactions Senku's smiles at the ammunition he has just been given. "You built him his castle didn't you?" Senku asks, a grin noticable in his voice. Stanley stiffens a bit beneath him before relaxing.
"For your information it was a group project. How did you even know?" Senku gasps in excitement. Stanley just realizes his mistake.
"Wait, I was just guessing. You actually built it for him? Did he even have to ask or did you just build it one day? Guys, how emo does it look? You have to tell me, please. I can't see it right now. It must be so emo. Ohhhhh, Xeno and you are never living this down." Senku cackles in manic glee at the amount of bullying material he was just given. His friends all give him a concerned look.
Senku then starts loudly proclaiming a tale about a knight that's a slug and a prince that a worm and how they fall in love and live in a castle so emo it turns anyone who looks at it emo too. Stanley visibly ages 10 years as Senku continues his tale. The others try not to laugh as Senku talks about how weak and pathetic the slug is.
"Oh, you actually found him. Is he still causing trouble?" A new voice speaks out, and Stanley visibly brightens. Senku immediately wilts, renewing his escape attempts with a second wind of strength. It doesn't work.
"Xeno! Thank God. It's your week to entertain the brat." Stanley says jogging over to the figure that stands on the road that leads to the castle. Stanley takes Senku off his shoulder and sets him facing towards the newly dubbed Xeno. When Senku finally sees the castle he freezes.
"Oh. My. God. It is so emo. And I'm supposed to be the one going through my emo phase. Xeno, are you sure you ever left yours? Guys, you did not tell me how emo this castle looks." Senku says, completely ignoring Xeno who just sighs at Senku's antics.
"It is not emo, Senku. It is a structural beauty-" Xeno starts saying before Senku interrupts him.
"You're emo, you're castle is emo, and you're pathetic if you think otherwise." Senku then fully looks at Xeno and starts laughing hysterically. "Oh my God, that's what your petrification mark looks like? Or did you tattoo that design on and call it one?" Senku wheezes between laughs.
Xeno flushes in anger at Senku laughing at him. Stanley sighs morosely before taking out another cigarette and lighting it. "I- no. It was like this when I woke up! Stop laughing Senku! Senku- stop laughing! I will have you know Stanley likes it!" Senku stops laughing at the last part and looks between the two adults.
Senku gags, "I did not need to know about one of Stanley's kinks old man." He spits at Xeno, and Xeno looks confused before he pales considerably. Stanley freezes then pointedly looks away. Xeno gapes at the both of them, then locks onto Stanley.
"Stanley Snyder, you have not-" Xeno cuts himself off and takes a deep breath. "No. We will talk about this later. Senku, how much damage have you done?" The others not in the know look confused but Senku stills and then pouts.
"You are not my dad. I do not have to tell you about what activities I have or have not done in the past couple of years." Senku says, stomping his foot like a child.
"Ishigami Senku you will answer my question right this second." Xeno says, tapping his foot looking expectantly at Senku. Senku just sticks his tongue out, then he freezes. He seems to spot something behind Xeno, and an evil excited look appears in his eyes. "Senku?"
"You left your door unlocked." Is all Senku says before he starts sprinting towards the castle that is just down the road. Xeno and Stanley both pale and curse.
Stanley starts running after Senku but Chrome sticks out his leg as Stanley is passing him while whistling. Stanley doesn't react fast enough and falls face first onto the road. "Do you have any idea what you have just done?" Stanley asks from the ground.
Chrome just shrugs. "He told me that if a blonde man was ever chasing after him I was to try and trip him immediately." Xeno looks at him and sighs.
"He took on an apprentice. I don't know wether to be proud, or disappointed that he didn't finish his lessons first." Xeno says to himself.
Suika pops up beside Xeno out of nowhere and Xeno flinches, before he grasps at his heart. "Two apprentices." She says proudly and Xeno blinks down at her. Then sighs and turns towards the castle just in time to see Senku skip happily into it.
"At least the front door doesn't have a lock yet." Xeno says, but Stanley freezes.
"Xeno, we installed those last week." Stanley says from the ground where he's still lying down. Xeno looks at him horrified before he takes off running towards the castle.