Work Text:
“What do you want to order for dinner?” Dan heard Phil shout from the living room.
He was snowed in with emails and had spent the last few hours just trying to get through them. The beauty of being self-employed, nobody’s policing you so you end up working at all different hours. Dan looked at the clock on his PC and only then realised it was already late in the evening and he needed to rush if he wanted to have some time off before sleep.
“Don’t have any preference, just surprise me, you know what I like” he replied and went back to his work.
“Alright, there’s this new place I’ve wanted to try, ORDEEEEEERRR”
By the time the food was delivered Dan managed to finish everything he planned and was able to enjoy the meal together with Phil. They sat at the table, chatting through their plans for the next day, munching on the food. Dan thought his chicken tasted a bit weird, but he pushed the thoughts aside, claiming he has a stomach of steel and whatever happens he’ll be alright. They went ahead with their evening routine as usual, calling it an early night as they had planned a studio visit for the following day to film their next video and to just get a change of scenery for any work that had to be done.
“Alright, so we need to be up before 9 if we want to have enough time to get to the studio, fight with the emails and film the video” Phil said just as he finished rinsing his mouth at the ensuite sink. “God look at us, who would have thought all those years ago we would be getting ready for bed before midnight and planning to get out of said bed before midday - call it character development I guess” he laughed looking at Dan, who was also smiling.
“It’s called growing old babes, not character development”
“Yeah whatever, let’s just get to bed, I’m actually tired” Phil said as he left the bathroom and sat down on his side of the bed, Dan appearing shortly after him. Amazing how after all those years they still loved sharing space and really just enjoyed each other’s company - it was natural that the other one was there even if quietly doing their own thing. They turned the lights off, mumbled goodnights and fell asleep quite quickly.
It was still dark outside when Dan was awoken by a sharp pain in his stomach. Still half asleep he realised how nauseous he was feeling, sweat covering his body and face. After analysing the situation for a second, he decided he’s alright, just bloated and feeling full so he grabbed his glass from the bedside table. After a few sips of water he figured it must be a bit of an indigestion which will hopefully be resolved by morning. He made sure to stay as quiet as possible, not to wake Phill up, even as he felt some air bubbles travelling up his chest. Burping quietly he laid back down and tried to fall back asleep. The joys of being in your 30s, you can’t eat late before going to sleep or you end up in this exact situation. Luckily, after a few minutes his stomach seemed to calm down, he moved closer to Phil, craving comfort, cuddling him slightly before going back to sleep.
The next time Dan opened his eyes it was already bright outside. He was hoping the episode from the night was just a fluke, however he was quickly proven wrong. His stomach was cramping and nausea was hitting him in full force. “Fuck” he mumbled before sitting up and trying to decide what he needed to do. Another cramp made him double in pain and that was when he realised he needed to get to a toilet. Quickly. As Phil was still sound asleep, he grabbed his phone and went to the bathroom down the hall.
They might have been together for many years but Dan still felt embarrassed about being vulnerable or just human in front of his partner - he also didn’t want any noises from the bathroom to wake Phil up, he would rather die of humiliation. Funnily if it was the opposite situation, with Phil struggling, Dan wouldn’t bat an eye or think anything about this. They’re humans, humans get sick, might be a bit gross or uncomfortable. Of course that thinking didn’t apply to him, he was not everyone, and even after 16 years he still needed felt the need to be perfect in front of his boyfriend, or at least that’s what his brain kept telling him.
It must have been at least ten minutes of ongoing torture, pain hitting in waves when Dan actually realised how bad he felt. He could hear the noises coming from his insides, he was sweating. Reminded him of the pontoon, only this time he had immediate access to modern plumbing, with no actual risk of destroying the environment. Getting up from the toilet and cleaning up he felt nausea rise up his throat. “God not now - not after all the damage’s already done” he thought to himself. He decided to ignore the feeling for the time being and started the shower to quickly freshen up - it took him one look in the mirror to deem this a necessity, he was sweating and feeling generally disgusting.
Standing under the water, letting it relax his tense muscles he was mentally analysing his options. He could tell Phil he was unwell and they’d just stay at home, pushing the video shoot to a different day - however for that he would have to actually admit how he’s feeling, not something he’s used to. For the time being, he thought that maybe his predicament would go away, maybe something didn’t fully agree with him and he just needed a second toilet trip to clear out his system and he’ll be good as new.
Dan walked into the bedroom to see Phil already awake but still laying in bed. “Morning, I see you went with a head start this morning, eager to film the video that much?” Phil said sitting up and going for a quick good morning kiss. “Yeah, woke up and didn’t feel like laying in bed so I showered already” Dan said back, deciding not to say the full truth, giving him a kiss back. “Go and shower stinky, I’ll go and make us some coffee”. Dan knew he wanted to raid their medicine cabinet in the kitchen without Phil questioning him, which is why he offered to get breakfast started. Going up the stairs he could still feel his stomach cramping, he needed some tea, maybe a toast and pepto. He knew they had some stashed with how often Phil needed it because of his stomach issues and he just hoped it would work fast enough before they needed to leave their house. After finding the disgusting pink liquid, he took the recommended amount, and started the coffee machine for Phil’s morning drink. He opted for tea, coffee would just make his stomach worse, knowing how rough it can be on his stomach on a normal day, let alone when he was feeling like shit. He prepared some toast for both of them, setting it out on the table before he felt his stomach rumble and he needed to make a run to the toilet once again.
Just after a couple of minutes he could hear Phil walk around the kitchen. Well, his hopes of his stomach behaving were quickly dying, along with his dignity. “Why did we decide to build the fucking loo just next to the kitchen?” he thought, while silently praying that over the sound of the fan nothing too revealing could be heard in the kitchen. Took him a few minutes to finish up, wash his hands and go back to join Phil for breakfast.
“Thanks for the coffee and toast bub, you alright?” Phil looked at him with genuine concern in his eyes and Dan almost melted at the spot. One look still had the same effect on him, as it did back when they were in their early relationship days. “Yeah, got stuck scrolling through reels, you know how it goes” he answered with a laugh.
“yeah that’s cursed territory in your case, I don’t even want to know. Let’s eat and get going - you not having a coffee this morning?”
“Not really feeling like it, will probably have some later”
They ate while chatting, Dan struggling with every bite of the plain butter toast he was having. He knew it was going to be a long day, his stomach still regularly churning. Shortly after finishing their food, they packed their backpacks and waited for an Uber to take them to the studio. Dan started to question his plan for the day, as he felt nausea rolling around in his stomach, the toast sitting heavily. The pepto he took was not doing its job so far and he silently prayed that it was just a matter of a few more minutes before it hit. He was considering speaking up, letting Phil know he was not feeling well when his phone rang informing them their driver was outside.
The drive to the studio felt like ages, Dan growing more nauseous with every second. He was not the one to get motion sick, but that day was not in his favour. Looking out the window he tried to focus on the horizon and he couldn’t be happier to see the outside of their building. At this point he knew he was going to vomit, it was just a matter of time. They left the car, and Dan felt he was losing the war with his stomach as they were walking inside.
“You go ahead and get the studio ready, I’ll just pop to the loo and join you in a second” Dan muttered as they were walking past the restrooms in the corridor. He didn’t wait to hear any confirmation from Phil, smoothly opened the door and ran into the cubicle. He opened the toilet seat and dropped to his knees in front of it, whincing when he felt pain from sudden movements. He was also disturbed about kneeling on the floor in a public bathroom, shared with others but he knew he had no other choice. He gagged and suddenly the toast made a reappearance. If he was puking he knew that was not a matter of some food not sitting right, but rather a full-on food poisoning. He remembered the chicken from last night, which triggered yet another round of vomiting. “Great, just great, fucking chicken”.
He was aware Phil would be waiting for him, so once he felt stable enough to get up, he flushed the toilet, rinsed his mouth with water from the sink, and left the bathroom after making himself look put together. He joined Phil who was already setting up all the lights and getting the background ready for filming in the studio. Dan was certain he looked like death, he felt sweaty and his hands were shaking, not to mention his stomach which still just didn’t want to settle. He grabbed his water bottle he was once again considering telling Phil how awful he was feeling. After taking a few sips of water to rehydrate he noticed the blister of antacids on the table next to him and he quickly grabbed two before Phil could even question it. Dan was actually surprised Phil had not noticed anything yet. He was usually quite good at reading him and how he was feeling, but at the same time Phil also knew that on some days Dan just didn’t want to talk and he respected his wishes.
After doing some work on their laptops they started filming and were almost halfway through when Dan felt his stomach cramp once again emitting a loud gurgle. That made him slightly wince in pain, and his discomfort could be easily noticed. It was now obvious Phil clocked him. “Everything alright? You hungry already? We can have a quick break and maybe think about some lunch” Phil looked at him, and for the first time that day he noticed, how pale Dan actually looked, but he decided not to mention anything. He knew how hesitant Dan could be to admit he’s not feeling well and that he would just get annoyed if he was bombarded with questions.
Dan took a deep breath, coming to realise that his stomach has not settled and he was running out of time before he needed to act on it. “I need the toilet, give me a few minutes" He quickly said, while avoiding Phil’s gaze, grabbed his phone and ran to the communal bathroom in the hall yet again. If Dan had to list his most humiliating moments in life, this would be following the pontoon closely. Fighting with his stomach in a public bathroom, where other people could hear him, and were very much aware what was happening, was his personal idea of hell. He could hear some guys from different offices come into the bathroom and leave while he was stuck in the same situation, his face burning with humiliation. After around ten minutes he looked at his phone and saw a message from Phil
You’re not feeling well, are you? do you need anything?
He knew at this point there was no need to fight and pretend he was fine, he just wanted to go home, lay in their bed, his own private bathroom on demand and deal with his stomach without additional embarrassment.
No, i think the chicken from last night doesn’t like me :( i’m almost done, give me a sec
His stomach hurt like crazy, but after a few more minutes he decided it was safe to go back. He appreciated Phil not coming in to check on him, sticking to texting instead. He waited until he was sure no one was in the bathroom before leaving the cubicle to wash his hands and secretly go back to their studio. Not only was he feeling sick, but also just straight up ashamed, he hated bringing more attention to himself than necessary. Just as he walked through the door Phil stopped whatever he was doing, got up and embraced him in a loving hug.
“You idiot, I knew you were suspicious this morning but you should have told me you were unwell, we wouldn’t have came here and you’d be resting at home now. You think it was the food from last night? How are you feeling?” Phil started to bombard him with questions.
Dan fully accepted defeat at this point and melted into Phil’s arms for maximum comfort. “I was embarrassed - I woke up during the night feeling sick, but nothing happened, thought nothing of it until I was almost shitting myself next time I opened my eyes, it’s been a rough morning” He was almost crying at this point, he just wanted to feel better and to have someone take care of him “thought it was only going to be a one off but then I puked when we got here, I think it’s food poisoning. My stomach’s not settled and I don’t think I’m finished being sick”
Phil let out a deep breath as he listened to his partner rambling “oh Dan, we talked about this, you need to be honest with me if you’re not feeling well. I know you don’t like this but you’re still human and humans get upset stomachs from time to time, even the perfect ones - can’t believe I have to explain this to a person who wrote a mental health book” Dan let out a small laugh as he heard Phill talk. “Let’s pack up here, we’re going home, you need to rehydrate and rest, you feel up to going now or you need the bathroom before?”
Dan felt semi stable for the moment and confirmed that they should just go home right now before his body decides to rebel against him one way or another. He ordered an Uber as Phil worked around the studio to turn off all the lights and pack their bags. He was determined to make it home before anything happened against his will. They were both thankful that the driver arrived quickly and the traffic wasn’t too bad. Phil watched his partner closely as they were both sitting in the back of the car, he was also hoping Dan would make the journey with no issues, as he would be absolutely mortified if anything happened. He gently intertwined their hands, giving Dan a small supportive squeeze, feeling extremely thankful they could finally display some physical attention towards each other in public.
The car stopped just outside their house and Dan almost sprinted out of the car, fumbling with his keys already by the door. For the last five minutes of the ride he was breathing deeply, trying not to throw up in the car. He almost thought that was a lost battle, but when the car stopped he just decided to make a run for it, leaving Phil confused in the car. Getting the door opened he barely made it to the bathroom next to his room. At least here he wasn’t scared of sitting on the floor, he cleaned it himself a couple of days ago and no one’s been here but them. He started heaving and was actually in shock how there was anything else left in his stomach. After a few minutes he heard Phil lightly knock on the door, before he walked in not waiting for an invitation and started to gently rub his back. He also brought a water bottle and gave it to Dan, who took it from him when he caught a break from vomiting. They spent a few minutes there just sitting in comfortable silence before Dan moved away from the toilet and spoke up “Alright, I think I’m done for now - thank you for staying with me”. He looked at Phil and tried to muster up a smile “God I must be so gross right now, I smell absolutely rank, how are you still attracted to me?”
Phil actually let out a laugh “oh shut up you twat, in sickness and in health or whatever they say” he kept on lightly rubbing Dan’s back “we both know you would do the same way for me, so you feeling ready to go to bed? I’ll get you some peppermint tea, it might help”
“We’re not married, you rejected my proposal, did you forget already?” Dan responded, pulling a serious face “I need to brush my teeth and lay down, help me up please?”
Phil did not waste a second before offering his hand to support Dan in getting to the bathroom sink. Giving his partner some privacy, he went to the kitchen, made tea for them both and grabbed his laptop on his way back. Walking into their shared bedroom he could see Dan had already undressed himself and was trying to get himself comfortable in bed. Phil put the mug within an arm’s reach on the small table next to Dan’s side and settled alongside him, already opening his laptop to play something in the background.
“Please don’t feel embarrassed telling me when you’re unwell, we’ve talked about this Danny” Phil said while curling Dan’s hair on his fingers “I want to take care of you like you take care of me, no matter if it’s just a regular migraine or a humiliating ass bleed. We’ve been together for way too long - you’re not fooling me Howell, I know you’re a human” Phil said chuckling. He felt Dan let out a sign while settling on his shoulder “have a nap, maybe you’ll feel better afterwards”
“Thank you bub”
The house was comfortably quiet, a youtube video playing on low volume. It only took a couple of minutes before they were both asleep - something about sharing a bed and feeling the warmth of their bodies has always put them easily to sleep. Nowadays they rarely slept cuddled up, mostly on days like this where they were under the weather and craving additional love. It was amazing really how even after all those years they still felt like teenagers, freshly in love excited to be next to each other.