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“Knock knock, anybody home?” Daniel called out, poking his head into Sam’s lab. The lights were off and he squinted around, eventually spotting Carter at the desk, staring past the blank screen of her computer. “Uh, why are you sitting in the dark? When was the last time you ate? Come and have some jello. Or, you know, real food.”
Startled from her thoughts, it took Sam a second to gather herself and respond. “Oh, no thanks Daniel, I’m really not that hungry. I’ve got a lot to do here.” She reached over and flicked on a lamp.
Daniel paused, eyes narrowing as his gaze shifted to the darkened screen, the lack of work in front of her. A small furrow appeared between his eyes. “Are you okay?”
She summoned a smile but it somehow didn’t quite reach her eyes. “Fine.”
“Liar.”
“No, I’m not,” she argued halfheartedly.
Daniel raised an eyebrow in a delicate show of disbelief. “Not a liar, or not fine?”
Caught by her own words, Sam slumped down in her seat and dropped her chin into her hand like her head was suddenly too heavy to stay up on its own. She didn’t answer.
Daniel tentatively took a seat opposite her. He was quiet for a while, considering his words. In the end he let out a deep breath and said carefully, “Sam, I’ve been wondering since Antarctica. What did Teal’c and I really interrupt that day at Jack’s place?”
Taken aback, she lifted her head with a start and stared at him. “Nothing … Just … I was going to …” she trailed off and sighed heavily, eyes falling away.
Daniel waited a long time, but she didn’t continue. “I’m sorry if our timing was bad,” he eventually said, looking genuinely contrite.
Sam shrugged and shook her head dismissively but said nothing.
He decided to try a different angle. “Are you—” he paused here, then plunged ahead. “—still seeing Pete?”
Sam glanced sharply at him then shifted her gaze to a point on the table in front of her. “Yeah.” Her voice was deliberately neutral.
“Huh.” Daniel mused on this, nodding thoughtfully.
Sam caught something in his tone. “What? It’s not serious.”
“Does Pete know that?” Daniel waited until she met his eye and then held her gaze, eyebrows raised.
Sam hesitated, just long enough to be noticeable. “Of course he does, we’re completely on the same page.”
“Oh, right,” Daniel replied knowingly. “So he’s also pretending he’s not in love with someone else at the same time he’s dating you. Got it.” He leaned back in his chair, head dipping in a series of long nods.
“Daniel!” Sam’s tone was razor sharp now.
“What? We both know that’s what’s going on here!” He cast his hands out wide, daring her to argue with him.
“That is absolutely not what is going on here!” Sam insisted, her eyes flashing dangerously.
“Liar,” he retorted, yet again.
Sam glared at him but didn’t contradict him any further.
He took a deep breath and blew it out slowly. “Sam, I’ll just never understand. You both care about each other, what’s the issue?”
“That’s a pretty big assumption you’re making.” Sam muttered, her eyes dropping away.
“Oh come on, anybody who knows you two can see how you feel about one another.”
Sam groaned. “That’s not the reassuring statement you seem to think it is, Daniel. Besides, it’s just not that simple. You know that and you know why.”
He shook his head firmly, his mouth set in a line. “I don’t buy it. Not anymore.”
Sam glared at him again, this time in disbelief. “Why not?”
Daniel shrugged. “You and Jack are … you and Jack.” He waved his hand vaguely in the air. “You could ask for anything at this point and they’d probably let you have it.”
She looked helplessly back at him, unsure how he didn’t see. “No, that’s not true. Especially right now. And anyway it feels like, I don’t know, the moment’s gone. We missed it somewhere.” She dropped her gaze to the desk where her fingers were twisting around each other. “It’s too late.”
Daniel frowned. “You’re only saying that because Jack’s in stasis. We’ll figure it out, we always do.” His voice was quiet but certain.
She pulled her eyes back up, their blue depths stormy as they met his. “Even if we do … It still won’t be simple. It never is.”
“So make it simple.”
“Make it simple?”
“Sure.”
“Just like that?” She flung her hands into the air. “Make it simple? Daniel, if it were that easy wouldn’t we have done it already?”
“Maybe not.” He shrugged, then pinned her with a direct look. “But I think you’re wrong. You haven’t missed the moment, you just haven’t gotten to it yet.”
She stared back at him, unblinking. “How can you know that?” Her voice was barely above a whisper.
He didn’t answer right away, just studied her face with the expression he wore during difficult translations. Finally he said, “Well, I guess I don’t.” His gaze sharpened. “But that also means you don’t either,” he pointed out.
She appreciated that he hadn’t given her the flippant, obvious answer. “Maybe you’re the one who’s wrong.” Her jaw lifted stubbornly.
The side of his mouth quirked up with a ghost of a smile. “I suppose that could happen.” He sighed. “Just don’t give up, okay?”
Sam’s eyelids flickered closed and her head dropped. “I think I have to. Sometimes it just hurts too much.”
He watched her, brow furrowed in worry. “And it’s that easy?”
Her eyes snapped open. “I didn’t say it would be easy. Just…necessary.”
“We’ll get him back, Sam. This isn’t the end.” Daniel leaned forward to reach across the desk and placed his hand over both of hers where they were still fidgeting in front of her.
She stilled. “I know. But nothing will change, it’ll still be impossible. It’ll still be—” she broke off with something that almost sounded like a sob, then took a deep, grounding breath. “—painful.”
He nodded. “You’re allowed to feel that way. It feels hopeless right now, I get it. All I’m saying is wait and see what happens.” He paused and dropped his eyes to their hands, weighing whether to continue. “It’s not fair of me to say this,” he began. “but I’d give everything I have for another day with Sha’re. You and Jack are both still alive. You shouldn’t waste it.”
He brought his gaze back up to meet Sam’s. Her eyes were bright with unshed tears and she turned one of her hands around to squeeze his briefly before pulling away.
She sniffed delicately, blinking back the tears. “I know you’re right, Daniel, I just don’t know if I can keep going like this.”
He nodded sadly. “I know. Why don’t we just take it one step at a time. First we need to get Jack thawed out and de-Ancient-ed. Everything else comes after that.”
Sam considered this for a long moment, staring back at him. Eventually she nodded. The brimming tears were gone and she looked steadier. “Okay. I can do that.” She stood up and flicked off the lamp, plunging the lab back into semi-darkness. “Let’s go. Didn’t you promise me jello?”