Work Text:
“Alec, why is there a handbag that is neither mine nor Daisy’s on our couch?”
Hurried steps on the stairs, a flustered Alec with the sleeves of his shirt rolled up. The couch with the unknown item between them. “You’re home early.”
“I’m not. It’s 6 pm.”
“Oh? Well…”
Tess put her hands on her hips, trying her best not to overreact. “I asked you a question. Where does that handbag come from?”
“It’s Tatiana’s,” he sighed.
“Tatiana.”
“I can explain it.”
“You better do.”
“We were called to rescue a…”
More steps. Lighter this time. Daisy appearing in the living room holding a toddler. “Mum, you’re home early!”
Out of the corner of her eye, Tess saw Alec’s eyes grow huge. A bad, bad sign.
She closed her eyes and breathed deeply. “Is that Tatiana?”
“No, that’s Izabella. Tatiana’s daughter. Isn’t she cute, mum? Look at the freckles!”
The toddler wiggled in Daisy’s arms and stretched them out toward Tess.
Tess kept her hands on her hips. “Ok guys. Does anybody care to explain to me who these people are?”
Izabella clapped her hands excitedly, a trail of drool running down her chin.
“Her mum and her fled from a violent guy and were sleeping rough. With this cold, can you imagine it?” Asked Daisy. “Wanna hold her?”
“No. I mean… where is the moth…”
“Here, let’s sit down a moment,” Alec took her by an elbow and nudged her toward the sofa. “I’ll explain.”
Tess sat. “I’m very eager to learn the details.”
“As Daisy was saying, the baby’s mother was found sleeping in the streets by one of our PCs. Despite speaking almost no English, she agreed to follow him to the nick with her daughter. We guess she is an illegal immigrant who fled a violent environment, but to carry out a proper interview an interpreter would have been needed, but our Russian interpreter seems to be on sickness leave.” He sighed.
Tess was taken aback by his flow of words. “And why did you take the baby home?”
“My shift was over, she kept crying, and there was nobody to take care of her. It is just for a couple of hours, Tess. Until the new interpreter arrives and the social services find them a place for tonight. O’Leary will take the mother here, they’ll fetch the baby and go to their shelter.”
Tess groaned. She had had a killer day at work, and all she had wanted was to kick her shoes off, take a warm shower and have a nice, drama-free evening with her family. Was that too much to ask for?
“Mum, don’t be angry. We already changed her and fed her,” said Daisy, who was sitting beside her.
“I’m not angry. Well, a bit with your father maybe,” she gave Alec The Look, “But I understand it was an emergency. How old is she? What has she eaten?”
Izabella, sensing Tess’ eyes on her, stretched again toward her, and this time Tess took the toddler in her lap.
“We don’t know. We gave her milk with cookies and she ate three.”
Tess scanned the girl, who kept on babbling and smiling at her. “I’d say she’s between one and half and two. Ouch! Back off, young lady.”
She had grabbed a fistful of Tess’ hair and started pulling gleefully at it. As she hard Tess’ raised voice, she froze and her lower lip started to quiver. A moment later inconsolable sobs filled the room.
Tess bounced her on her knees, rubbing her back. “Oh dear. Shhh, there now, there is no reason to make such a fuss. We are friends, aren’t we?”
Izabella burped and puked a goo of milk and cookies on her white shirt.
Alec stood, ready to take the girl away from his horrified wife. If there was a thing Tess really hated, it was icky, sticky stuff.
As to confirm his predictions, she creased her brow and looked at the yellowish stains on the front of her pristine shirt, but just asked for a tissue. Alec hurried to fetch her some paper towels from the kitchen and muttered a vague apology.
Izabella kept on crying. Tess rocked her in her arms while staring at him with a raised eyebrow. Alec knew he was going to pay for that.
Daisy picked that moment to decide that, freckles or not, a toddler wasn’t so cute when she started wailing, and sneaked back to her room ‘because of homework’.
After a few minutes, the girl calmed down and rested in Tess’ lap sucking on her own thumb, exhausted. “She needs a bath,” she whispered. “Her hair is dirty and she smells funny.”
“I know. Daisy and I tried to wash her in the bathroom sink, but as soon as she saw the water she started shrieking.”
“She’s scared. Even the way she got upset as soon as I raised my voice a notch… This is a scared child, Alec.”
Tess might have a point. The circumstances under which the child and her mother had ended up on the streets were still unclear, but for the moment the minor was under his responsibility. Well, sort of. “Do you reckon we should check for signs of abuse?”
Tess exhaled. “My God, Alec.”
“Right… sorry. I just wanted to offer her a quiet environment until the guys had found her mother a place for the night.” He checked his watch, “a matter that should be settled by now. I’ll ring the nick to find out what’s going on.”
To his surprise, Tess smiled at him. “That’s ok, I know you were trying to help. Make that call now, and tell the mother I’ll send her the laundry receipt for my shirt.”
He smiled back. Despite some recent strains in their marriage due to overwork and everyday life hassles, they still were a team. Everything would be alright.
Except he got lousy news from the nick. Izabella’s mother had sneaked away while waiting for the interpreter, and they had lost her tracks.
“Bloody O’Leary says she’ll probably come here. How could they lose her, for Christ’s sake?”
“Shhh! You’re scaring the child.”
“Sorry.”
“What’s in the bag?” Tess beckoned to the battered handbag on the other side of the couch.
“Children's stuff.”
“Any clean clothes?”
Alec unzipped it and checked its contents. “Nappies, something like a blanket, a stuffed toy, and yes, baby clothes.”
Izabella still in her lap, she wiggled beside him. “Let me see. There, these look like a reasonably clean pajamas. And we could use the stuffed bunny.”
As soon as the girl saw the toy, she stretched her arms toward it. “Golick!”
Tess gave her the stained toy and she pushed its tummy. The bunny started to play a lullaby. “Golick is your special friend? You don’t understand a word of what we say, do you, little one?”
Something in Tess’ voice made his stomach flutter. Images of her playing with a much younger Daisy, telling her bedtime stories cuddled in a way too small bed, came back to his mind. Whydid they seem to belong to a lifetime ago?
* * *
Izabella looked at her with big blue eyes and babbled something in baby Russian. Tess wasn’t eager to put her through the stress of a bath now that she seemed to have perked up, but the sad truth was that that adorable toddler simply stinked. She put her down, and Izabella moved a couple wobbly steps and leaned against the coffee table. Where was her mother now? Had she really fled, leaving her child in the hands of strangers? Tess felt anger tugging at the pith of her stomach, but that wasn’t time for anger; there was no way she could get hold of the mother, and all she could do was grant that little girl a warm, comfortable night. Which meant a bath, food, sleep.
“Daisy, I need you downstairs!”
At her sudden words, both Izabella and Alec startled. Damnit, she really needed to control the tone of her voice.
The loud call had the desired effect though, and moments later Daisy came galloping down the stairs. “What?”
“I need you to take care of dinner, ‘cause your father and I need to give Izabella a bath.”
Alec stiffened his back a notch further, and Tess had to stifle a smile. That could turn out to be fun.
“Uh, ok. Pizza night?”
“We have a guest that still wears nappies and that already puked your cookies on my shirt, Dais. I’d say you can microwave some veggies and boil some rice.”
“With curry?”
“Why do I even…”
“Just joking! Geez, you must have been a really boring mother.” Daisy stuck her tongue out at her and set herself to work in the kitchen.
“Keep on behaving like this, and I’m sending you to a boarding school where you’ll have to wear a pinafore!” Tess called after her.
Izabella clutched her bunny.
She had raised her voice again.
The bathtub was ⅓ full, with white foamy bubbles covering the water surface. Tess rolled the sleeves of her shirt to her elbows and told herself that dealing with a young child was like driving a bike: once you have learned it, you can’t unlearn it.
“Ok, you can put her in the water now.”
“Me? No. Here, do it yourself.” Alec tried to gently untangle a fussy Izabella from his arms. “First time I tried she got really upset.”
“Don’t be a wimp, Detective Inspector. Besides, this is your case.”
“I hate you.”
Tess sat on the edge of the bathtub. “Do you?”
Alec started to pace up and down, and tried to negotiate a surrender. “Come on wee one. It’s just a nice warm bath. You’ll feel better afterwards. You’ll go to sleep all clean, and dream of …” He glanced at Tess for help, but she just crossed her arms and shrugged. That one was his battle, not hers.
He squinted at her and went on. “And dream of bears, and castles, and cotton candy mountains. Here, look at the bubbles.” Alec bent to scoop up some foam with his hand, and after a short hesitation Izabella put her little hand over his and started to play with it.
“Bea!” She shouted pointing toward the bathtub.
Alec took that chance to sit on the tub edge himself. “No, that is Tess. But yeah, close enough.”
Tess wrinkled her nose, making Izabella laugh.
A moment later the girl was sitting happily inside, splatting water everywhere. A splash of foam ended up right on Alec’s eye.
“Damnit, it stings. I can’t see…”
“Ouch. Stay still, don’t…” Tess wiped it away with her fingers. “Better?”
“Aye, thanks.”
Her hand lingered on his cheek; he looked tired. He had been working so much since he was promoted to the position of DI, and she was worried about his health. The doctor had told them that his arrhythmia was under control, but she knew he had been skipping meals and wasn’t getting enough sleep. Their work had always been very important to both of them, and Tess was proud of his commitment and honesty, but she was also starting to wonder what was getting lost during that unrelenting race to do more and better.
That train of thoughts was interrupted by Alec’s lips brushing hers. After the initial surprise, Tess smiled and kissed him back, her palm still on his stubbly cheek. Alec closed his eyes and deepened the kiss.
More splashes of water.
Tess snorted and laid her brow against Alec’s. “This isn’t very professional, detective. We’re still working on a case.”
“Bea!”
Alec sighed and redirected his attention to the grinning toddler, his breath still a bit short. “Aye, young lady. It’s time to wash your hair.”
Tess took the sponge out of his hand and started to drip warm water over Izabella’s head. “Put on some dry clothes, I can manage this from here.”
Both Alec and the the little girl frowned. “Sure?”
“‘Course, piece of cake. You go check on Daisy. Remember what happened to the toaster the last time she tried to cook?”
He stood and kissed the top of her head. “Ok, I’ll fetch the fire extinguisher.”
She smiled as she rinsed shampoo out of Izabella’s strawberry blond hair. “Time for some girl chat, uh? You know that when I was a little girl I would have killed for hair like yours?”
The toddler babbled an unintelligible answer and splashed some more water on the bathroom floor.
After dinner, Daisy took Izabella’s hand and gave her a tour of the house while Tess changed into her pajamas. As he was finishing to wash the dishes, Alec got a call from O’Leary: Tatiana, the girl’s mother, had turned up at a shelter a few miles from the police station. They were on their way to talk to her, but a social worker had told O’Leary that the woman had panicked, fearing that they would send her back to Ukraine, and fled to the shelter where she used to seek refuge. Apparently, she kept on asking for her daughter.
That was good news, he guessed.
Upstairs, everything was silent. Daisy’s door was closed, while that of their bedroom was ajar. He glanced inside and saw Tess lying on her side on the bed, head propped up on the palm of her hand. Izabella was asleep next to her, the stuffed bunny clutched in her little hand.
“The mother is at a shelter.”
She raised her eyes to look at him. “Good. Wee Izabella is finally snoozing,” she whispered.
Alec sat on the edge of the bed. The only light in the room came from the lamp on his nightstand, and it cast warm reflections both on the girl’s and Tess’ face.
“I’m calling O’Leary first thing tomorrow morning, but we’ll probably need to take her to her mother.”
Tess nodded. “I want to make sure she’s in good hands though.”
“Of course, me too. Well, I guess I’ll sleep on the couch tonight?” He fiddled with the hem of his t-shirt, feeling rather daft.
“You can stay if you want. There is plenty of room, and at least we’ll be sure she won’t roll out of the bed.”
“You could put some pillows on my side of the bed…”
“Yes, I could,” she shrugged.
“Maybe I’ll stay for a while. Just to make sure that everything is ok, you know.”
Tess smirked and nodded. “That would make me feel much better.”
As soon as he stretched on the bed, the fatigue of the day caught up with him and he started feeling drowsy.
“Look at all these freckles; she could be your daughter. Hey, what do we know about the mother?”
Alec smiled, still looking at the ceiling. “Don’t start.”
“I’ll really need to have a chat with that woman tomorrow.”
“Would you like another one?”
“Another what?”
“Child.”
She didn’t answer, and Alec regretted his question a moment after the words had left his mouth.
After a long pause of silence she exhaled. “No, I don’t think I would. Daisy is almost thirteen, and our schedule is already crazy enough. Would you?”
“I don’t know. Maybe not, but… I miss the time when Daisy was younger.”
“And you think that another child would bring those times back?” She was running her fingers through Izabella’s hair now.
“The fact that you asked this question is a sign that you don’t, I guess.”
Tess’ eyebrows drew together. “I don’t think that bringing another life into this world would solve our problems.”
“So we have problems.”
“Don’t be a wimp Alec, you know that we have problems. Every couple has. What I was trying to say is that… I’d be happy with what we already have. Today was good. Spending time with you and Daisy to take care of this little girl was fun, and… I wish there were more days like today.”
“We spend a lot of time together.”
“But it’s always work, work, work! We keep on running and running, we keep on asking ourselves and our daughter to do more and better, but what for?”
Alec draw his hands across his face. She had a point. Since he had been made DI he had been working six days a week, and when he came back home he was often too tired or nervous to have quality time with his family. But what else could he do? The workload was heavier than both of them had expected, and yet he couldn’t go back, could he? In a way, he felt trapped.
Tess’ hand touched his arm. “Hey. I know you’re doing your best, and I know that I’m a bloody workaholic as well, just… Just let’s try to spend more time together as a family, shall we? In a couple of years Daisy won’t probably even be willing to show herself in public with us, so I don’t want to waste these last fragments of her childhood. What do you think?”
He kissed her hand. “I think that for once you are right.”
“For once?”
“That’s a big compliment coming from DI Cupcake.”
Tess tried to feign surprise, but her mouth curled in a smile. “Cupcake?”
“Come on, I know the guys call me so. It’s not so bad after all.”
“Oh, they don’t trust me with their gossip. You know, I shag the boss.” She gave his arm a little tug and curled under the covers with Izabella. “Time to go to sleep, Cupcake.”
“Yeah.”
Tess switched the lamp off. The only source of light now was the rectangular frame of the window, from which seeped a pearly cold gleam. It had to be a full moon night, but of course he hadn’t noticed. “Tess?”
“Uh.”
“I think I’ll sleep here after all.”
Her voice was muffled by the pillow. “Just to make sure that everything is ok?”
He smiled. “Yeah.”
“Peachy.”
A few moment later a light snoring filled the room.
The little girl started fussying long before dawn. Tess tried to ignore her soft whining, her sweaty little hands and the foot planted against her stomach for as long as she could, but had to give up when the bunny started to sound its lullaby.
That, finally, woke Alec as well.
He fished for his glasses, although he wore them barely anymore during the day. “What is it? Everything’s alright?”
“Golick,” explained Izabella matter-of-factly, waving the stuffed toy in front of him.
“Oh. What time is it?”
“A quarter to six. Go back to sleep, Alec. I think she only needs to get changed.”
“You sure? I’m just lying here for a little while anyway, not falling asleep.” He yawned.
“Yeah. If I need anything I’ll yell.”
“I don’t doubt you will, love.”
Tess silenced the bunny and gave it back to a worried Izabella. “Now come here young lady, it’s time for a new nappy. Wash away the old and make way for the new; that’s my favourite way to start a new day.”
The girl took her hand and followed her to the bedroom door, always clutching her toy. Huddled under the covers, Alec was dozing.
The house was bathed in a gray-azure light. Outside, the sky over the row of houses facing theirs was full of clouds. Another cold winter day; one of those smelling like coffee and wet concrete. She wondered where Izabella would be in 24 hours. In a shelter room with her mother, probably. That wasn’t bad, but, as she had told Alec the night before, she wasn’t going to let her go before making sure she was in good hands and in a safe environment.
She changed her diaper, then fixed breakfast for both of them. Coffee and cookies for her, milk and Frosties for Izabella.
They sat at the kitchen table as the girl eyed the chocolate cookies.
“No way you can have them. Remember what happened yesterday? I have the feeling my shirt will never be the same.”
“Vame,” she commented with her mouth all sticky with milk and cereal crumbs.
Tess nodded as she put her mug in the sink and emptied the content of the suitcase holding the toddler’s stuff into the washing machine. “Let’s see if at least your clothes can be saved. I don’t think I’ll have the time to iron them, but at least they will be clean and dry. What do you think?”
But Izabella was busy grabbing Frosties from the bag and sticking them in her mouth. Tess’ first impulse was to put a handful of cereals in a bowl and put the box away, but she decided to let the kid have some fun. When had she become so uptight? There had been a time when she had enjoyed eating cereals straight from the carton herself, but that seemed to belong to a distant past.
She sat back at the kitchen table and switched on her iPad to check her email. As always, she deleted the spam messages promoting special offers bound to change her life, and skimmed over the work related stuff. Several forwarded messages containing reports or service alerts, and a short message from DS David Thompson, where he thanked her for having been ‘such a good team-mate’ during the case on which they had recently worked together.
Slightly unprofessional, but nice. Tess liked the new DS ok. He was good natured and fun, despite being a bit green. Well, at least he wasn’t a walking concentrate of cynicism like Alec… She pressed the heels of her hands against her eyes. Where were these thoughts coming from? She knew she loved her husband, and she knew he was a great officer and a good man. Yet, sometimes she had the impression that he lived his life seeing other people as mere side characters in his own play, herself included. He would never waste his precious time to send a thank you message to someone.
Izabella had stopped munching and was now staring at her iPad.
“I wasn’t making comparisons,” Tess felt compelled to point out. “I mean, Alec is Alec, but don’t tell him I told you this. You know I met him when I was twelve?” The toddler was now looking straight at her, and Tess smiled thinking that - not understanding a word of what she was saying - that little girl was bound to be the safest confidante she’d ever had.
“He fixed my bicycle, and I could see in his eyes that he was deadly worried about my scratched knee. As you have witnessed yourself, he likes to take care of people.”
Izabella tried to tap her fingers on the tablet, leaving sticky smears. Tess took her in her arms and sat with her on the couch, iPad on her knees. The rest of the house was still silent, except for the soft gurgling of the washing machine. “Here, let’s watch some stuff, shall we? What’s the hit of the moment in Toddlerland? Peppa Pig? Yeah, I think the pig should do.” She opened YouTube and loaded a random Peppa Pig video. The girl was mesmerized by the pastel colours, laughing every time one of the characters oinked. That first video was followed by many more, and their dumb repetitiveness lulled Tess back to her musings.
She had been surprised when Alec had voiced his feelings about the possibility of a second child. Surprised and a bit upset, to be honest. He usually was the king of rationality, and at that point in their lives there would be nothing rational about having another baby. Daisy was growing up fast, already dipping her toes into the stormy sea of adolescence, and Tess had reason to guess that the perspective of a baby sibling wouldn’t have thrilled her. But most of all, she already felt that, because of her job, she wasn’t giving her daughter all the attention she deserved, and she didn’t want to have to cut her quality time with her even further. Not to mention that, clear and simple, she wasn’t crazy about babies. Maybe that made her unwomanly and selfish, but at least she wasn’t a hypocrite. She remembered Daisy’s first months as a period of lights and shadows; of course she had loved that little squirmy bundle from the moment they had put her into her arms, but that kind of bond, made of dependence and quasi-animal love, sometimes had felt stifling. She had felt relieved when Daisy had started to turn into her own person, and her role as mummy bear and milk dispenser had faded in favor of a more fulfilling relationship.
Yet, she knew that Alec had cherished every single moment of her pregnancy and of their daughter’s first year. He had been protective and sweetly worried. That would have annoyed the heck out of her if it hadn’t been for his sheer happiness. Yes, he liked to take care of people, and it made sense that he thought that a new baby would make things better between them. Was she willing to go through nine months of discomfort again, and at least an equally long period of sleepless nights and career hiatus to quench that feeling of loneliness that she could no longer ignore? Maybe that wouldn’t be such a bad idea…
At that point the image of her own mother popped up unwelcomed in her mind. Her mother, who was so desperate to keep her second husband that she started trying to get pregnant again without telling him right after their first born had died of leukemia. Her half sister, a little girl called Emily, had arrived eleven months after Cullen’s death, and two years later her mother and Phil had divorced.
“That’s how afraid us girls are of rejection and solitude, Iz,” she said to Izabella, who was now leaning against her side, and chewing on poor Golick’s left ear with gusto.
More Peppa Pig episodes followed. Upstairs, someone flushed the toilet. A few moments later, she heard Alec talking with Daisy first, and either to himself or with someone on the phone then. Tess put her arm around a slumbering Izabella’s shoulders and kissed her temple.
She heard Alec approaching.
“The social services gave the thumb up for the mother to be reunited with the child. They’ll stay at the shelter and share a room with another woman from Belarus. We are scheduled to be there with Izabella by nine.” His hair stuck out in every direction and the hem of his pajamas bottoms was a bit frayed.
“So they aren’t from Russia.”
Alec knitted his brow. “No.”
“Do they speak Russian in Belarus? I think they speak an entirely different language.”
“Have no idea. I need a cup of tea; want some?”
“Yeah, why not.” Izabella’s body was warm and soft against hers, and she could feel her quiet breathing. It was almost 8 AM.
Upstairs, Daisy stomped back and forth from her room to the bathroom. She seemed to take an endless time to get ready these days, to the point that more than once she had been late for school.
Alec handed her a mug of tea and sat on the edge of the couch. Tess knew that she should ask more technical things: was Tatiana, the mother, an illegal immigrant? Had she really been abused? Did mother and child have valid documents? But she wasn’t feeling ready for all that yet. It seemed that DS Henchard was still sleeping.
“She likes Peppa Pig,” she explained instead, dumbly.
Alec stared at her wide-eyed. “And you haven’t slept enough tonight.”
She snorted and kicked his shin with her bare foot. “While you look quite lively, Mr I’m just lying here for a little while, absolutely not sleeping. That was two hours ago, by the way.”
He ran his hand through his rebellious hair while muttering something about her snoring, and Tess couldn’t help smiling at his scrubby appearance.
“Your hair seem to be still missing the pillow, though.”
To her surprise he smiled back, and after his smile had faded he was still gazing at her.
Tess cleared her throat. “I think Izabella’s clothes should be dry, and… we should get moving if we want to be at the shelter in an hour. Which shelter are we talking about, by the way? I hope it’s not the Christian Mission, because there is no way I’m leaving her there.”
His stare was still on her. “It’s a Women’s Community House. The one in Bradford street. And…”
“What?”
“You were so good to her. Thank you.”
She had to avert her eyes. “She’s a sweet girl.” Why the hell was her voice catching now? Alec was right, sleep deprivation turned her into a sop. Tess slid away from between Alec and Izabella, and carefully laid her on the couch. The girl fussed a bit but didn’t wake.
“Stay a moment with her while I unload the washing machine and get dressed, ok?”
“Uh… What if she wakes up?”
She beckoned toward her tablet. “Show her age-appropriate videos on YouTube. I’ll be quick, granted that your daughter will let me in the bathroom before noon.”
Forty minutes later, Daisy had left for school right after having planted a big smooch on Izabella’s cheek, and the three of them were about to head to the shelter. Izabella got a bit nervous during the short trip, and as soon as they left the car she refused to walk and raised her arms toward Tess. She picked her up, and let her play with a lock of her hair.
Women’s Community House was a modern building of glass and concrete facing a busy road. PC Bill O’Leary and a chubby middle-aged woman she didn’t know, but who screamed ‘Social Worker’ out of every pore, were waiting for them in front of the lobby. Tess and Alec exchanged a glance and crossed the road. She clutched Izabella a bit tighter.
The CID was as noisy and chaotic as ever. One of his DCs had managed to lose the transcript of an interrogation, and the possible accomplice of a robbery had been called in to testify again. The guy had arrived late, and had taken the occasion to change his account of the events. By 2 PM, Alec still had an empty stomach and a vivid desire to punch both the sneaky scumbag and his idiot DC.
Before heading to the office kitchenette, he went to check on Tess. He was hoping to share a few moments with her over coffee, but when he saw her frowning at the computer screen among a heap of paperwork, he knew that wasn’t going to happen. She agreed to go home with him by 5, though.
He kept thinking about Izabella. Her mother had seemed ok; startlingly young and scared, but ok. As soon as the kid had seen her, she had started calling “Mati” and had tried to sneak off Tess’ arms to get to her. That had been bittersweet to watch, even if Alec was relieved to see what seemed to be genuine care and affection from the mother. Tatiana had hugged and kissed her daughter, whispering her things in their native language that made her giggle. She had taken Tess’s hand and had thanked her in broken English, and Tess had smiled one of her smiles that never reached her eyes.
They had a brief tour of the premises, and then met with the interpreter who had explained to them that Tatiana had fled from the police station because she was scared to be sent back to Belarus, where all that was waiting for her and Izabella was an abusive man. She had said she was very sorry for her behaviour, and started asking for her daughter from the moment she had set foot in the shelter.
Alec had made sure that someone would help them to get valid documents and some kind of employment for Tatiana. The social worker told them she had been a housekeeper in Minsk, and they were already moving to find her a similar job. Tess had remained silent the whole time.
That afternoon, the more he told himself he had to focus on the robbery case, the more shit kept happening. It turned out that his suspect had previously been implied in another unsolved violent theft, and they were about to have to release him again. He managed to keep Scumbag in custody for another few hours though, during which he went to talk to the victim of the first robbery in the vain hope to get something to frame him.
Alec got back to the CID at half past six. He had to sign Scumbag’s release papers and sat at his desk with his hands pressed to his throbbing temples. He was feeling a bit dizzy, but refused to think it was because of his heart. He just needed some decent food. While he had been at the victim’s house, a pissed Tess had texted to tell him that Daisy needed to be picked up from her friend, and DS Thompson was giving her a ride home. Meanwhile, someone had thrown a report on his desk that needed to be checked before tomorrow morning.
As he was finally driving back home, an icy cold sleet started tapping at the windows. Before he switched the engine off, the dashboard clock read 9:45 PM. Shit. Daisy’s window was still alight and a flickering beam came from the living room’s. He opened the door trying his best to not make any noise. Tess was asleep on the couch and stirred, but didn’t wake. The TV was on at a very low volume. On the coffee table there were some papers and Izabella’s stuffed toy.
Alec sat on the floor, his head just a few inches away from Tess’. The room around him started to spin. He closed his eyes and listened to the falling rain, but after a while his arm got numb and he had to move, waking her.
“Alec?”
“Yeah.”
“What are you… What time is it?”
“Almost ten. I’m sorry, I got stuck with that robbery case.”
She sighed. In the dim light, her eyes seemed even bigger. “Have you eaten anything?”
“A toast.”
Tess groaned and sat up. “I made potato salad. Or, as Daisy put it, snot salad with potatoes.”
“That’s gross.”
“That’s your daughter.”
They both smiled.
He put his hand over hers. “I’ll have some snot salad, but you go to bed. I’ll bring you some on a Kleenex if you want.”
She followed him to the kitchen table and put a scoop of salad on a plate. It actually looked like snot with yellow and green lumps in it, but the taste wasn’t as bad as he had braced himself for. He ate it watching Tess watching him.
“I called the shelter because we forgot to enquire about visiting hours this morning,” she said after a loud thunder seemed to shake her out of her thoughts. “She forgot her toy, and I want to give it back to her.”
“Did you also ask how was she doing?”
“It seems she’s doing fine.”
“Good. Look, I’m sorry I left you stranded this evening. I had to hurry to question a witness before my suspect was released.”
“That’s ok. Thompson gave me a ride here and I went to pick up Daisy at Ellen’s, then made this incredible potato salad.”
“I missed dinner too.”
She nodded as a sad smile curled her lips. “Good for you I made a cold dish then.”
Alec washed his plate and put it back in the cupboard. He felt as if he had just lost something important, but didn’t know what or where. Or maybe he didn’t want to know. “I’m going to bed. Are you…?”
“Yeah.”
In bed, they laid side by side without touching.
He cleared his voice before speaking. “What time are you going to the shelter tomorrow?”
“Before my shift.”
“Can I come with you?”
“Sure, but I’ll take my car this time.”
He could tell that she wasn’t really angry from her mocking tone. He touched her hand and she intertwined her fingers with his.
“Are you feeling better?” She asked when he was already drifting to sleep.
“What?”
“You were pale as a ghost earlier when you arrived. And you keep skipping meals. You know what the cardiologist said about food, sleep and stress.”
He sighed. “I’m fine, it was just a bad day.”
Tess freed her hand and propped herself up on her elbow. She outstared him, then shook her head and curled against him.
Alec opened his mouth to say something. The words didn’t come, but that night he held her for the first time in a long time.