Work Text:
“When will you learn not to play with people’s lives ?! Majority over minority doesn’t count if it’s our own employees you send to get themselves killed !”
“Whoever decides to work here knows the risks. Don’t act as if you aren’t prepared to die yourself. Or I will have to start doubting your will to make our country a better place.”
“For fucks sake Kinjo, nobody will be left to prepare themselves for the consequences if everyone’s dead ! Use your brain !”
“Guys, maybe we should stop yelling-”
Another day, another conflict between the Kisaragi Foundation’s leaders. It was a common occurrence, most employees preferred to look away until things settled. But it wasn’t to say those times didn’t come without its fair share of anxiety. Especially for one individual in particular.
“Please, calm down…” Teruya begged, shifting around in his spot. A handful of employees had perished during a mission for the second time this month. Rei and Tsurugi had started arguing over it half an hour ago and were still going. It didn’t seem to have a finish line at this point. The nerves in his body were raw and tense, as if expecting something to blow.
Like a deer trying to cross a road in pitch black.
They had been screaming and screaming constantly, he could feel how much their conflict had drained his energy.
“You always do this ! You act on your own and leave us to deal with the mess !”
He wished they could just shut up already. His ears were hurting from the noise, he hated hearing them fight like this. All their anger went directly to him, as if his brain fed off their emotions. He wished he could just run away somewhere he wouldn’t have to deal with them.
“You complain a lot about my methods, but you haven’t done much to replace them with something else.”
He wanted to crawl up into a ball and cry. To shoot away all those feelings his friends kept throwing at him.
“As if I’d ever be able to do that ! I don’t have the time to think that you’ve already messed something new up !”
The noises were getting louder. Louder. Louder.
His eyes kept shifting from one person to the other, hand vigorously rubbing his arm, so much it started to go numb.
Teruya couldn’t keep up, his mind was fogged, in constant surplus of informations. Soon, his body would give up entirely.
Tac. Tac. Tac.
What was that ? Footsteps ? The clock ? Was he hallucinating the sounds ?
He couldn’t think anymore.
What to do ? How to react ?
He had to stop. Them. Had to stop their fighting. Somehow. In any way possible.
“Stop it…”
They didn’t listen.
“STOP IT !” Teruya’s voice thundered through the office.
Overwhelming seconds of silence. His colleagues fixed him, eyes wide.
“Fighting won’t get us nowhere.” Tears were building up in the corner of his eyes, with no ways to stop them from falling.
“I can’t… I can’t take this anymore. I don’t want to deal with ya two it-it’s...” he stammered, breathless. “It’s drivin’ me insane !”
Teruya wiped the water running down his cheek. His voice kept breaking.
“Settle this now or I’ll… or I’ll...” What was the word ? Damn, what was it ? Think, think ! You have to find something to say and quickly !
“I don’t know… j-just stop it.”
Quit. That was the word he was looking for. They had to stop fighting all day, or he would quit. Or he would lose it entirely.
He walked out of the room in a rush, his breathing having met its highest point. He ran to his office, choking out cries, helpless.
Midori listened to the sound of her footstep as she walked down one of the long corridors of the Foundation. She heard from rumours that their leaders had had another argument. They seemed to get more and more frequent and some of her colleagues were starting to doubt them because of it. She preferred to trust the Foundation and listen to what she was told to do. It was easier that way. And it didn’t take a genius to see that they were all very capable people, even if they fought often. Because everything worked out in the end. Mostly.
“I hope my appointment won’t take too long, Ryutaro said he’d meet me at eight...”
Red went up her cheeks. She couldn’t wait !
Midori clenched her stack of paper closer to her chest and sighed. She could get as excited as she’d want, there was work she had to do.
“Ootori, Ootori, Ootori...” She looked at the doors she passed by, searching for the right name. One of the plate read “Ootori Teruya/Financial Department”. That was it.
The young woman knocked on the door, waiting for a response. She received none.
Maybe he’s not there, she thought, or he could be too busy.
After waiting for a bit, she decided to open the door. It wasn’t locked. Outside of some bright decorations here and there, Teruya’s office wasn’t out of the ordinary. Unexpected for someone who walked around rainbow coloured. Director’s orders, she guessed.
Midori looked around, searching for a tall man. He was sitting at his desk, head resting in his arms, laptop closed. Maybe he was tired ?
“Mister Ootori ?”
Teruya gave no answer.
She walked further into the office, hoping she’d make herself heard.
“Sir, I have the documents you asked me to deliver.”
Her superior finally budged, sitting back up in his chair.
“Oh Midori, it’s you. Sorry, I didn’t hear you enter. The documents, you said ?” Teruya asked as rubbed his face.
She handed him the papers.
“Right, those.” he gave her a weak smile and he grabbed them. “Thank you.” When he looked at her, Midori noticed how tired he looked. His eyes were puffy, his cheeks red… something about him was definitely off. The lack of emotions on his face made him seem completely apathetic.
“Ootori… are you alright ?” She knew she was getting into dangerous territory by asking him that; too much curiosity never ended well. But Teruya was one of the friendliest person at the Foundation and she was worried about him.
“Mh ? Of course I am. Look, as good as ever !” He shot her a thumbs up, but his voice lacked the strength to make it believable. He let his hand fall back on his desk, defeated by his own hypocrisy.
“Ahh… sorry, I’m a bit tired, as you can see.”
Midori watched him sigh as he took a look at the stack of paper she gave him. She had a feeling there was something to be done. She wanted to help him, just like he had done all those times before. Boss or not, he deserved kindness.
“Um… Sir, do you want to go on break with me ?”
“A break ?" Teruya glanced at his closed laptop before nodding. “Sure, I could use one.”
It was cold outside, and Midori shivered when Teruya opened the door to the balcony. She shouldn’t have proposed to come here, all she wanted was to lay on the breakroom’s sofa engulfed in a big blanket.
She made sure to close all the buttons on her coat before following the man outside.
Teruya leaned his back against the guardrail, hands clenching on his coffee cup for warmth.
“Are you sure it’s okay for you to be outside like that ?” the man asked her, raising his scarf closer to his face.
“Yes, I promise ! Please do not worry about me !” She felt like she was freezing in place. This idea of hers was a one way travel to catching a cold. But it was the only one she had thought of for them to get a calm moment alone. With a newly found determination, she decided to get to the heart of the matter at hand.
“Um… I heard… Miss Mekaru and Director Kinjo have been fighting again ?”
She fiddled with her hair anxiously.
“I-is it as explosive as people say ?”
Teruya let out a chuckle.
“I’m surprised you have the guts to ask that. Yeah, they have.” He lifted his head to look at the grey sky. “I probably shouldn’t say this but these two cannot talk without getting into arguments. So I try to help them find a middle ground whenever that happens.”
“...Every time ? But they fight so often-” Midori stopped herself with a low gasp. She definitely shouldn’t say that about her superiors, she could get in trouble !
But to her surprise, Teruya laughed and she saw a genuine smile on his face for the first time that day.
“Haha, I can’t disagree with you on that ! At first I kept count you know, to tease them.”
Somehow, the young woman wasn’t surprised Teruya let himself talk like this about his colleagues. His open demeanour was one of the many things she admired about him. There was something about him that always managed to put her at ease.
“I stopped after a year or so, though. It had lost its fun.” His face fell with those last words.
“It must be hard.”
“Not really, I’m just here to make sure they don’t get at eachother’s throat.”
“But wouldn’t that make you the one to take decisions, then ? I can’t imagine someone managing the Foundation while fighting constantly...”
“Come on, I wouldn’t go that far !” he sputtered, shaking his hand around. “All I do is find something they both agree on. Or disagree with. Mostly disagree.”
The woman listened to the words of her superior closely. He seemed oblivious to his importance in the Foundation. It had never occurred to her before that most of his time was spent managing his friends.
They both fell silent. Over them, the sky was heavy with clouds. Teruya threw his coffee cup in the nearby garbage bin, almost missing his shot. It got a tired laugh out of him.
Midori felt her heart drop. This was wrong. All so wrong.
Her whole life, she had been relegated to the sideline, condemned to watch others have fun and make choices while she was told to wait for people to write her path in her place. Always so frail, always so powerless. Too kind to get mad, too weak to fight.
She wasn’t sure if she could ever break free from those chains, but she had decided she would try, even if it was only to help someone smile.
“Mister Ootori,” she started, straightening her posture. “Why are you convinced what you do isn’t enough ?”
“You always try so hard to help us all. You are kind and friendly and-”
She rubbed her hands together, eyes shut tight. Gosh, that was so corny. And useless. She had no idea what to do with herself, her words simply refused to cooperate.
Hopefully, Teruya kept quiet, waiting for her to continue despite the clear discomfort —or was it bashfulness ?— settling in his eyes.
The young woman inhaled slowly and went on, her train of thoughts clearer.
“I don’t think many people would be able to handle Miss Mekaru and our Director. I know I wouldn’t.”
“I mean, someone’s got to do it, or else the Foundation would fall apart,” the man answered nonchalantly. “Um, don’t tell people I said that.”
“N-no that’s exactly what I meant ! They are both very competent people and I am grateful for all they do for us but… without you, they would just keep on arguing, I think.”
From the corner of her eye, Midori noticed how Teruya was slowly crawling in on himself.
“I doubt I do much more…”
“You do ! I know how… hard it can be see your own worth.” She knew too well. “But without you, the Foundation would be in a really bad shape ! We all know it. And… I’m sure they do too.”
Finally, she raised her head towards him.
“So please, don’t be so harsh on yourself.”
Teruya hid his face in his hands, trying and failing to keep his composure. It seemed it had been a long time since someone had allowed him to be sensible. Being the one to hear him talk about his problems felt a little bitter sweet. Him who was always so happy go lucky.
She heard him sniffle before wiping a tear away.
“Well shoot, ya got me all emotional.” Far away, over them, the grey clouds had turned puffy white, their content gently falling down onto the city.
“Oh look !” A snow flake landed on his nose, melting under his body heat. He smiled.
“I didn’t think we’d have snow this early !” he said as he extended his hand to catch some more.
“Maybe that means it’s time for us to get back to work, eh?”
Teruya checked the time on his phone. “Man, already six thirty… time passes too quickly.”
“Wait, my doctor appointment’s at seven ! I’m going to be late !” gasped the small woman, panicking.
“Want me to give you a ride ?”
“With all due respect, Ootori, I’d rather not.”
“Yeah, that’s fair,” he joked, thinking back to his horrible driving.
“Come on, let’s go.”
Midori watched Teruya walk back into the building with a smile, before doing the same. No matter what happened, she knew he would be okay. And if he could be, then so would the world.