Chapter Text
Murphy has always liked the simple things in life. A decent job. Nice people surrounding him. Good food. And after weeks and weeks of investigating to write this one important article, there was only one thing he wanted. Only one thing he craved for: a burger. A plain burger. Not one of those fancy ones, just a simple cheeseburger. Preferably served by his favourite pub which also happened to be the only one in town.
Right now him, Miller, Bryan and Raven were standing in front of said pub, or they were standing in front of the place where the pub had been, mere weeks ago.
“Are you fucking kidding me?” Murphy asked, staring at the green and orange sign in front of him in disbelief. This had to be some kind of sick joke.
“The Mush-Room” was emblazoned on the narrow house in disgusting bright colours. “Give peas a chance” was written under it, as if it was designed purely to mock him and his existence. Kind of comedic, although it felt more like a tragedy.
“This can't be true,” he continued. “Miller, tell me this is a bad dream. Can you pinch me? Are you seeing what I'm seeing?”
“Sorry, man. I fear this is exactly what it looks like,” Miller said, hanging his head, hands buried deep in the pockets of his jacket.
The old windows were painted light green, the small room was bright and filled with wooden tables and benches, looking like it came straight from some hipster hell. The whole place was ridiculing him. It was a conglomeration of everything he hated. Colours. Vegans. And try hards.
Murphy huffed, crossing his arms in front of his chest. „I'm hungry,“ he whined. Brian and Miller were watching him like someone might watch a wild animal ready to attack. Raven looked more like a cat that ate the canary, barely able to contain her amusement.
“Maybe we could–” Miller suggested cautiously, Bryan giving his arm a reassuring squeeze, while Raven tried to stifle a laugh by faking a cough and staring at the menu intently.
“Glad you still enjoy me suffering, Reyes.”
“Always, my love,” Raven chuckled. “Always.”
“You don't think I'm going to eat any of this crap,” Murphy insisted.
“Come on, man. Give it a try. Maybe you'll like it,” Miller said, putting his arm around Murphy's small frame and steering him towards the door. Bryan and Raven followed. Looked like he didn't have much of a choice there.
“Fine. But this is the first and the last time I'm going to set foot in this...whatever this is.”
The room looked even more horrendous on the inside. Everything was too loud and shrill for his taste. He remembered the old pub with nostalgia, the dimly lit room with dark wood and brown leather, warm and cosy. It had provided the perfect setting for eating burgers and drowning his sorrow in alcohol, preferably scotch.
This place, on the other hand, was atrocious. This was an abomination. He couldn't even repeat too many times how much he disliked the colours. He felt forced to be bright and happy, too. And he hated being forced. And he hated being bright, he liked to tell himself he was more of a dark jeans, dark sweater man. Not in a hipster kind of way, though. More in a brooding artist kind of way. In a “Don't talk to me, I'm a sarcastic asshole, that thinks his personality is reflected best by this non-colour” kind of way. Maybe he was not only allergic to house dust but also to happiness. How pathetic.
His destructive thoughts were interrupted by someone clearing his throat loudly. Apparently, they already sat down at a table, and the sudden noise caught him by surprise. He nearly fell from his chair due to his usual grace and body control, but two strong arms steadied him and prevented him from embarrassing himself in front of a whole room of meat haters. Maybe he didn't imagine the way some of them had sniffed at him as if they saw right through his weak act, as if they could smell his desire for meat oozing out of him at every pore.
Murphy looked up and realised he had missed that the others had already ordered and he was the next one. The waiter, and possible owner of those aforementioned arms, wore an orange T-Shirt, but it was not just the colour that offended Murphy, but also the fact that it actually looked good on him.
Orange on himself made him look like a vampire who didn't get blood for a while. And the arms looked good, too. But who was he to swoon over a vegan waiter's buffness. Was this even a word. He might prefer the word beefy instead, just for the sake of the bad pun.
“What can I get you?” The guy asked kindly, gesturing at the menu in front of him. He was really handsome at second glance, too. Tall, tan, dark curls and eyes, freckles. But that didn't make Murphy hate him less. He didn't discriminate. Especially with vegans - they were all the same, trying to spoil his daily dose of meat for him, lecturing him about their way of living, blah blah blah.
Murphy examined the food on display. Everything looked normal, suspiciously normal.
“I take one of the muffins,” he muttered, shifting in his seat nervously.
“Ah, the carrot, apple and zucchini muffins, good choice,” the guy beamed at him. If he didn't know better, he would think he was on drugs. No one was that happy all the time. But who knew with those tree huggers.
“The carrot, apple and zucchini muffins?” Murphy squeaked, trying to hide his disgust. They had looked like regular muffins to him.
“Um, I think I just want something to drink then. Not that hungry. Just give me a coke.”
“I'm really sorry, Coca-Cola may be vegan, but their products are not exactly compatible with our philosophy...”
Murphy gave a loud groan. This really was the worst day of his life.
“But, may I offer you something else?” the guy rambled on. “We have a variation of home-made lemonades or I can make you a milkshake if you like? With soy milk or almond milk?”
“Why don't you just give me a handful of leaves to chew instead?” Murphy snarled while the guy seemed to get smaller and smaller, the friendly smile nearly disappearing from his face completely.
“I...” he started to speak hesitantly.
“Listen, I just wanted to have my usual burger here, so my friends persuaded me to have a try before I realised that you hijacked this place to turn it into some weird hell hole for you and your lot. Which was clear to me the moment I set my eyes on this room by the way. The only reason I entered in the first place is that I'm fucking hungry and may have had the illusion to get at least some decent food in here. Which was an illusion after all-”
“Yes, he is always such an asshole,” Raven interrupted his rant and shrugged at the waiter apologetically. Murphy darted her an angry look, which she tried to soften by patting his thigh, only earning her another scowl, though.
“All right, all right, I'll give you this,” the guy said suddenly. “I get it, you are annoyed and all, and you pictured this evening differently. I know where you're coming from.”
Murphy snorted in return, a frown on his face.
“But let's make a deal. I am going to make you a burger now. If you don't like it all your food is on me, you leave the restaurant and never come back again. And if you like it, I am hoping to see you here again soon,” he finished, eyes sparkling. “And you have to be honest.”
Murphy had to admit that he was really good-looking. Even at a third glance.
“And I'm Bellamy, by the way.”
“John, but everyone calls me Murphy.”
Bellamy looked at him, weighing him up, then asked challengingly: “So you're in, John?”
The use of his first name had brought a sour look on his face again, but Bellamy didn't seem to mind.
“Or are you afraid you might like it?” he taunted.
“Oh, don't blame me for your financial ruin later. And thanks for the free food!” Murphy said, confident of victory. There was no vegan burger in the world able to convince him of anything.
The other three were grinning at him once Bellamy left. “What,” he said. He didn't understand what was their deal now. They were always pestering him when he talked to a good-looking guy. And he hadn't even been flirting this time. Nothing to see here.
***
Ten minutes later Bellamy emerged from the kitchen with a plate, setting it in front of him with a “bon appétit” and a small curtsy. It was kind of charming actually.
All of them looked at him expectantly as he took a first hesitant bite. He chewed slowly, keeping a straight face the entire time. The tension increased the more and more time passed, but nobody tried to ask for his opinion, too afraid of his possible reaction. He grinned slyly at the thought of this.
“So, how is it?” Bellamy asked him finally. Murphy put down the burger in front of him without hurry. He had to admit that he enjoyed keeping them in suspense, adding an unnecessary dramatic sigh or a little twitch.
“It's...” he mumbled, his mouth full of food, choosing his words wisely to not give away too much. “It's OK. It's tolerable,” he said after another long pause. He was enjoying this.
It was delicious, but that was something he would never concede. The bun managed to be crispy and fluffy at the same time. The patty consisted of some undefined vegetable, but it was spiced in just the right way. The sauce was a little bit spicy too, adding an interesting twist.
“So I won?” Bellamy beamed at him again. This guy seemed to be radiating. “Let's call it a pity win. And just for the records, I would have preferred a big meaty burger instead.”
“Eww, gross,” Bellamy said, a disgusted look on his face.
“If God wanted us all to be vegetarian, why did he make animals taste so delicious?” Murphy called after his quickly disappearing figure.
“Never heard that one!”
“It's not that I don't like animals, I just prefer them crispy!” Murphy added to cement his image. He felt a little bit proud of himself.
Maybe he deserved Raven kicking his shin under the table after a little bit. Not that he cared what this vegan thought of him. Nope. Definitely not. Not in the slightest. And he most definitely didn't check him out when he walked away either.