Chapter Text
Subaru stared at the woman.
The woman stared back.
She was an enchanting woman. Her hair seemed to belong to the sky itself, so blue and ethereal that it made Subaru pause when he first saw her. Her eyes were golden like molten sunlight, bright enough to make him forget how to breathe for a second. Her body was slender yet curvy, wrapped in flowing white robes reminiscent of a Greek toga, lined with silver and gold.
She was literally the most beautiful woman Subaru had ever laid eyes on.
But there was a slight problem.
She was in his room.
His locked room.
On the second floor.
And he sure as hell did not let her in.
She stood there, arms crossed, her bare foot tapping lightly on the floor as she continued to stare at him, as if she was waiting for his response.
Normally, this would have been the part where he freaked out, screamed loud enough to alert everyone in the manor, and put as much distance as he could between himself and what was likely a threat.
He did none of those things.
It was strange. Every instinct in his body, every thought in his head, told him that this woman was safe despite the absurdity of the situation.
It was abnormal. And Subaru was not stupid enough to ignore that.
He hugged Beatrice closer to his chest as he cautiously questioned her, an escape route quickly forming in his head.
“Who are you? And why are you in my room?”
Her foot stopped tapping.
Her gaze narrowed slightly before she began walking toward him as he remained seated in bed, his back straightening as she approached.
Once she reached him, she spoke.
“Natsuki Subaru. You have seduced countless of my children. I am here to ensure that no future harm shall befall them through their association with you.”
What.
The.
Fuck.
“Um, lady, I don’t know who you are, but I definitely did not do any of those things. I can assure you I am very unpopular with women.”
“I am not speaking solely about women, Natsuki Subaru.”
“...What are you saying?!”
“Do not feign ignorance before me. I know of your effect and influence on my children, even more so on my favorite one.”
Subaru did not like the implications of that sentence.
“While I am grateful for the aid you have given them, I am also aware of how dangerous you are. Therefore, from this moment onward, you shall remain by my side, so I may ensure no future troubles follow in your wake.”
Subaru blinked blankly at her.
And did so again.
“...Who are you?”
For a brief moment, the room fell completely silent except the faint sound of the wind crashing into the window.
The woman closed her eyes, as though in both thought and acknowledgement.
“Of course, you would not know. Then, let me introduce myself.”
Her golden eyes opened once more.
“I am the one my children call Od Lagna. The essence of this world.”
Subaru felt his stomach drop.
And then she smiled.
“And now, I shall watch over the foreigner who entered my body without permission.”
…Fuck.
-
-
-
“U-um, would you like some tea, your G-Grace?”
“None of that ‘grace’ nonsense, my child. I have been given a proud name by you all, and I will be referred to by nothing else.”
“Th-then… Od Lagna-dono?”
“Hm. In that case, I would appreciate another cup of tea, dear.”
“O-of course, Supreme one!”
“...”
Petra quickly hurried out of the room to prepare more tea, her footsteps the only sound echoing through the suffocating silence.
The Emilia camp sat around the dining table, each of them casting nervous, panicked glances toward the pair that took the head of the table, where normally either Emilia or Roswaal were seated.
Emilia herself looked confused and slightly intimidated.
The oni maids, deranged as ever, kept a vigilant eye on the situation, as though ready to fight back against the essence of the world itself if it attempted to harm one of them.
Garfiel kept lowering his gaze before sneaking another glance at Subaru and Od Lagna, a faint blush of embarrassment and mortification coloring his cheeks.
Otto stared at Subaru with bloodshot eyes, both accusatory and pitying.
So, basically…things were going as well as they possibly could have.
“E-excuse me, Od Lagna-sama,” Emilia asked carefully, her gaze repeatedly flickering toward the hand Od Lagna held tightly in her own, Subaru’s hand. “May we ask why you are here? And in my knight’s room?”
Od Lagna smiled gently at her, her eyes not missing Emilia’s flickering gaze.
“An adequate question, my child.”
She pointed to Subaru, who sat by her side, his expression grumpy.
“You see, this one is a troublesome individual. Many troubles follow him wherever he goes, and he has done many things to me that no one ever has.”
Subaru’s eye twitched violently.
“I am aware of his influence on you all, and while I am grateful for the happiness he has brought my children, I am also wary of the negative effects he may yet have upon them. I could not simply leave him unaccounted for and unrestrained.”
Subaru spoke in disbelief from her side, frustration filling his expression as he weakly tried to pull his hand away from Od Lagna’s. Weakly, because he already knew from experience that she would not budge.
Her skin was so smooth it was unfair, dammit!
“Unrestrained?! I keep telling you, Od-san, I’m the one getting dragged into trouble!”
“And I keep telling you, foreigner, that I understand. Yet, how much my children are enamored with you remains equally true.”
Otto leaned forward, forcing himself to ask the question everyone wanted to know the answer to.
“Y-you know each other, Od Lagna-sama?”
Od Lagna answered Otto calmly, her gaze leaving Subaru.
“This person has defiled me countless times.”
Silence enveloped the room.
The one who broke it was Emilia. Even if she did not entirely understand what Od Lagna meant by ‘defile’, she understood enough to dislike the implications surrounding her knight.
“T-that’s not true, Subaru is a good boy!”
“Indeed he is,” Od Lagna agreed with a small nod, “Despite repeatedly violating me and forcing me to do things I would never have done normally, I cannot say I disliked it. Or rather, I disliked it at first, but he left me very much satisfied. He had reached and done things to me that no one had ever done before, and for what he left me with, I am thankful.”
Emilia appeared even more confused.
Rem and Ram looked like one breath away from committing a murder.
Otto was foaming at the mouth.
Garfiel looked at him…awestruck? Subaru might need to talk to him later.
Beatrice, forgotten by everyone as she sat on Subaru’s lap, patted his knee in silent comfort after realizing the kind of clusterfuck this was about to become.
And Subaru himself finally snapped.
“Could you PLEASE stop talking like that?!”
Od Lagna blinked at him innocently.
“I am merely speaking the truth.”
“That somehow makes it worse!”
“Hm,” She tilted her head slightly, “Would you prefer if I described how deeply you penetrated me?”
The room exploded into chaos.