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Grace knows it’s his heart as soon as the swelling starts. He’d suspected as much when he started getting short of breath on his walks with Rocky. But that well could have been his lungs. Now his ankles have started swelling and his chest aches–it’s his heart.
No good! He knows it’s no good. It’s a scary way to go–it could come at any moment.
He had debated telling Rocky. They always knew Grace would be the one to leave first. Dog years, and all that. But Rocky always worries so much.
He tells him.
And it goes about as well as he’d expected.
-
“Rocky, I have to tell you something,” he says, not taking his attention away from the rolling waves.
“What is it, question?” he asks.
Grace braces. “I think my heart has started to go,” he says quietly.
“Go?” Rocky asks.
“Um. Fail. It happens to humans sometimes, when we get older. Cardiovascular disease is actually one of the top killers where I’m from.” It makes sense, really. The period of starvation might’ve enlarged his heart. It might not be pumping right. Probably isn’t. It wasn’t designed for the strain of extra gravity, either. This would be a predictable outcome had he bothered to predict it.
Rocky crouches low. “Grace not old though. Grace is only approximately 65,” he argues.
“That’s kind of old for a human bud. It’s retirement age anyway.”
“Grace said average human life expectancy is 80 years, statement.”
Grace winces. “Average, buddy. Not guaranteed. And besides, I’ve put this poor thing through a lot more than the average human body goes through.”
Rocky seems momentarily at a loss. He shoves one fist into the sand.
It hits Grace like a truck; Rocky was counting on another 15 years with him.
“It might take a long time to kill me,” he says, voice so low it’s barely audible.
“No,” Rocky says, stern. “It not kill Grace. Rocky will fix.”
Grace takes his glasses off and heaves a sigh.
-
Rocky makes noble efforts to fix it. The scientists that monitor Grace come up with an equivalent to baby aspirin that Grace takes daily. It eases the chest pains, he finds. He thanks his lucky stars for that.
They have no means of doing an electrocardiogram or echocardiogram to diagnose the problem more particularly, but it’s good data that the aspirin helps.
Rocky also forces Grace to officially retire–it’s probably for the best, given how much the exertion of getting to his classroom wears him out.
It’s sad though. It’s a lingering ache that he can’t be who he’s always been anymore.
He’s really dying, isn’t he?
-
It’s the beach, the same as it’s ever been, and Grace watches Adrian and Rocky walk the shoreline together. They’re so in love, and Grace will weep if he thinks about it so he doesn’t. He just watches his friends lean into each other as they stroll.
Eventually they make their way back to where Grace sits, stationary in the sand, quilt folded over in his lap.
“How are you doing, question,” Adrian hums.
“Good. I’m happy,” Grace answers, and his chest aches all the same.
-
Grace has fewer and fewer good days. It’s harder to breathe all the time now. Chest pain is his new norm. It makes his animal brain panic, and he spends half his time every day trying to remind himself to remain calm. It’s just death, right?
He’s had a good life, hasn’t he?
He’s taken to making gratitude lists. Everything he loves, no matter how small, makes the cut. The miracle of his enclosure. His quilt. Morning coffee. Rocky. Adrian. Getting to be a teacher while he could (that one hurts–he counts it anyway). A good night’s sleep, when he can get it. There’s so much that he loves, truly.
-
It’s game night, so Grace is tidying up for Rocky and Adrian–it’s the rare occasion where they go into his home proper.
They arrive exactly on schedule–Rocky is perfectly punctual, even if Adrian is more like Grace in that regard.
They play through their usual rotation–adapted versions of Earth games and Eridani games alike, though there was considerable overlap in the first place. They both, for example, have a version of charades.
Grace sits out on the acting himself; he’s just too tired tonight. But still, he enjoys the guessing. And he still kills at Boggle, even with Rocky and Adrian getting additional time to make it fair.
He falls asleep in his seat during the last round of trivia, and wakes to Rocky shaking his shoulder. Rocky doesn’t have to say anything–his fear is clear from his posture.
“Hey buddy,” Grace says, still groggy. “Who won?”
“Friend Grace,” Adrian says, “How do you feel?”
Grace does his best to evaluate. He’s in pain, and so, so tired. “Honestly, I might need to call it quits for the night.”
“Adrian and Rocky stay,” Rocky insists. “We will watch you sleep.”
“Yeah, okay,” Grace agrees.
The last thing Grace sees before falling asleep is his two dearest friends in all the universe, watching over him lovingly.
-
Rocky knows Grace is gone. He feels it deep within him before he can even think to check for a pulse. So he doesn’t. He just puts his suited hand in Grace’s hair.
-
It takes days for Rocky to be functional enough to come up with funeral plans.
Stupid, stupid, he should have done this with Grace, right when he first said something was wrong.
But he didn’t. So now he has to pick up the pieces by himself.
Well, not really by himself. Adrian is here with him, thank everything.
The loss is like salt at the beach–getting over everything, making old hurts sting. There’s no place it does not reach. He doesn’t know what he would do if he was alone.
-
Grace’s funeral is beautiful and sad and overwhelmingly loving.
Rocky leads it, of course, but Adrian speaks too. So does one of Grace’s students from his first-ever class on Erid. Dozens attend it–students, parents, the team of scientists that helped Grace live with them. But also, folks who are complete strangers to Rocky; Eridians who loved Grace for helping to save their planet.
Rocky loses his voice more times than he can count.
He was so loved. And now he’s gone.
-
“Sleep, I’ll watch you,” Adrian coos.
“No,” Rocky says.
“It’s been a long time, you need rest,” they argue, annoyingly reasonably.
“I don’t want to,” he says. He doesn’t want to risk dreaming about Grace, good or bad.
“Please love, you’re exhausted,” Adrian says.
“Fine, fine,” Rocky agrees.
-
In Rocky’s dream, the three of them are on Grace’s beach. Grace sits under his quilt, smiling. Adrian leans into him. He coos. He loves them both so much.
“How are you doing, question?” Adrian asks Grace.
“Good. I’m happy,” Grace answers. Grace smiles up at them. And they’re all happy.
They really are.