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Dan wakes up one chilly morning to find a stocking at the foot of his bed. He realizes with a kind of distant ache that he doesn't want to examine too closely that it must be Christmas.
That would mean he's been here for just over two months, wouldn't it? Huh. Not that long ago, Dan would have expected to feel something other than numb about that.
Dan scoots down to the foot of the bed to inspect his gift. The stocking is exceptionally cute; most of it is the typical bright red of most Christmas stockings, but the opening is guarded by a plush reindeer head with a nose as red as the stocking itself. Dan can feel the oldness of it in the aged texture of the fur. It feels special, loved, so Dan handles it with the utmost amount of care, wanting to preserve the love in the wear and tear from years prior.
The contents of the stocking aren't very exciting; inside he finds a satsuma, some lip balm, and a bunch of individually wrapped chocolates. Dan curls his fingers around a small handful of them, his heart thumping in his chest as they soften under his body heat.
Gingerly, Dan unwraps a chocolate and places it on his tongue, holding it there and letting it melt fully in his mouth before he swallows. He thinks it tastes like love.
As Dan drops the remaining chocolates back into the stocking, the door to his room creaks open and Phil steps inside with two plates of pancakes in his hands. He smiles brightly when he sees Dan's already up. "Merry Christmas!"
"Is it really?" Dan asks curiously. Phil hands one of the plates off to Dan along with a plastic fork — as cautious as he is, he doesn't let Dan have real silverware. "You aren't going to celebrate with your family or anything?" Dan takes a bite of his pancakes, humming happily at the pleasant taste of them.
"Ah," Phil says with a small sigh. "You're too smart for your own good, Howell." He ruffles Dan's hair fondly. "I figured I could celebrate with you early, but I am going to have to go away for a few days soon."
"A few days?" Dan's eyes go wide as he drops his fork onto the plate. "But what about me?" Dan doesn't bother trying to hide the panic in his voice. They both know he doesn't like being left alone, and Phil's never been gone for longer than a few hours before.
"I know," Phil says with a frown. "My family really goes all out for Christmas though. I can't not go."
Dan's mind is spinning, his breath is coming in short bursts as anxiety floods through his body. "Can I come?" The words are out in the air before Dan can think about them. When Phil's frown deepens, Dan already knows what the answer will be.
"Not this year," Phil says, sounding truly sad about it, but he leaves the possibility of the unspoken future on a hook for Dan who clings to it desperately, using it to steady his heart. "I'm sorry, Dan."
Dan looks down at his pancakes, his appetite suddenly gone. "It's okay," Dan lies. "I'll be okay." Probably.
Phil puts hand on Dan's chin and tilts his head up so he can look him in the eyes. "You will." The conviction in Phil's voice relaxes something inside Dan. Phil leans forward to press a tender kiss to Dan's lips. When he pulls back, he says, "Hang on, I have a gift for you."
And then, in a flurry of movement, Phil disappears, leaving Dan feeling cold and bereft, just a taste of what's to come when he leaves him alone for longer. God, what is Dan going to do with himself?
When Phil returns, he's holding a wrapped present in his hands. He holds it out to Dan like a peace offering. Dan sets his plate next to him on the bed and takes the gift. It's lighter than he expected it to be considering the size of it. It's bigger than Dan's head, but it hardly weighs anything. Dan shakes it a little, but nothing rattles inside of it. He raises an eyebrow at Phil.
"Go on then," Phil says with a nod and a wide smile.
Dan unwraps the present slowly, teasing out Phil's eager anticipation just because he thinks it's cute to watch Phil squirm a little. Dan slips a finger under the edge of the wrapping and drags it, peeling the tape off in tiny increments just to see Phil fidget more and more.
"Oh my god, Daniel," Phil says in exasperation when Dan starts repeating the process under another seam of the paper rather than tearing through it. "I'm going to eat you if you don't hurry up."
Dan grins as a thrill runs up his spine at the words. "Promise?"
Phil throws up his hands in despair. "Of course you would like that," he wails, but Dan can tell it's with good humor; he's not actually upset. Instead, he seems quite entertained by the whole thing.
Dan decides to put Phil out of his misery, and he rips the rest of the paper off in one quick tear that seems to echo off the walls of the room. He's left holding a stuffed Tonberry, a creature from Final Fantasy, in his hands. Dan presses the tip of his forefinger to the point of the knife in the Tonberry's hand; if it were real and not just a toy, Dan would be dead now.
The Tonberry is a deceptively cute creature, with its rounded features and its small stature, it seems so innocent. You wouldn't think it was as dangerous as it truly is. In reality, the Tonberry's one-hit kill ability is one of the most insidious and powerful attacks in the Final Fantasy franchise outside of a boss battle, and it's led to more game over screens than Dan is happy to admit.
Dan tears his eyes away from the plushie to look at Phil and his deceptively innocent face. Dan's heart aches. "It's perfect," Dan says, his voice barely a whisper. "I love it."
Phil beams with pride and he scoots closer to Dan, so their arms brush together. "I thought you would. It's so cute," he says as he leans into Dan. "Like you." Phil rests his head on Dan's shoulder with a happy hum in his throat.
Dan squeezes the Tonberry in his hands, feeling the soft give of the fabric and stuffing beneath his fingers. "Thank you," Dan says. He turns, shifting the both of them around so he kiss the corner of Phil's mouth. "I didn't get you anything." It feels strange to say; they both know Dan has no way of getting Phil a gift, not when Phil won't even let him climb the stairs, but Dan feels a strange sense of regret anyway.
"That's okay," Phil says, his voice soft and kind. "I have you." Phil pushes at Dan's chest until Dan is flat on his back with Phil hovering above him, a wicked smile spreading across his face.
"Yeah," Dan breathes out as Phil lays a possessive hand on his hip. "You do."
Game over.