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The classroom erupted with noise and chatter. It was 8 am and the home room teacher had still not arrived in the class which meant the so called menaces of the class were having the time of their lives.
Euijoo slumped against his seat, just hoping the teacher would arrive soon because all of his friends were being too loud.
Like who the hell decided that it was a good idea to have a dance battle at fucking 8am.
Apparently the class menaces Taki and Yuma were having a dance battle, and stupid Maki was betting on them as well. Then there was president K, trying to control them but things even seemed out of his hands.
In the meanwhile, Fuma comes to sit beside Euijoo, putting his bag down. "Hey"
Euijoo looks up. "Hi, you're finding them loud too?"
"Kinda" Fuma laughs, before he looks around. "Your best friend isn't here today"
Euijoo blinks. "Nicholas?"
Right. It was almost 8 am. Why wasn't Nicholas here yet?
"Maybe he isn't coming today?" Euijoo answers, unsure. Nicholas didn't tell him about skipping yesterday, but it was almost 8 now and he's never this late.
Perhaps he was skipping.
"I mean that's why I came to sit next to you" Fuma laughs. "Nicholas doesn't let anyone take this seat"
Euijoo laughs, shaking his head. "He's just like that"
"No he's seriously crazy" Fuma says. "That day in the basketball court, when I sat next to you he was glaring at me. Then later he dragged me to the side saying 'the place next to euijoo is my designated space'"
Euijoo's lips curve up in a smile before he snorts. "You know Nicholas acts childish for attention"
"He's such a possessive best friend" Fuma adds. "He hates sharing you with any of us"
"He's been like that since the day we became friends, it's nothing new" Euijoo answers.
"I wonder how he's going to behave once you get a girlfriend or something" Fuma says. "He's going to make her third wheel"
Euijoo just laughs at Fuma's comments. It's true that Nicholas was overly possessive about Euijoo. Always sat right next to him. Paired with him for any assignment, project, team or group work. Since middle school, Nicholas had been clinging to him 24/7.
And it's not like Euijoo hates it. He loves Nicholas. He's his best friend since the past 4 years.
But at times, Euijoo felt the other gave him no space.
"We will see when I get a girlfriend.." Euijoo says, laughing as fuma playfully side eyes him.
"You know what" Fuma says, leaning in. "You getting a boyfriend will be way worse because Nicholas would constantly compare himself to him. But wait, with Nicholas being your best friend I don't think he's going to allow a boyfriend in the first place-"
Euijoo slaps Fuma's arm hard. "Hey what's that supposed to mean-"
"I mean no boyfriend would be able to get past Nicholas's ass" Fuma says trying to shield himself from Euijoo who looked like he would smack him again.
"I actually have no idea what would happen in that case" Euijoo sighs. "He barely lets me hang out with you guys"
"Then I guess just date him" Fuma shrugs.
Euijoo turns red before slapping another arm of Fuma's. "That's ridiculous. We're best friends!"
"Whatever man" Fuma says.
The teacher still hadn't arrived but someone else had in the meantime. Nicholas with his bag slung across his shoulder rushed inside the class almost getting knocked out by Taki's arm who was still in a dance battle.
Nicholas squeezes past them to get over to the desk he and Euijoo shared, but he stops 2 metres away to find Fuma and Euijoo sitting together and laughing constantly.
With furrowed eyebrows, Nicholas walks up to them, tapping Fuma's desk. "Hey get up it's my seat"
Fuma and Euijoo turn their attention to Nicholas. "Oh you're late today, it seems like your seat is taken by me" Fuma says, raising an eyebrow playfully.
Nicholas glares at him, tapping his shoulder. "Whatever, it's my place so get up”
"Hey Nico" Euijoo speaks up. "Fuma already sat here before you, how about you sit with K today?"
Nicholas looks at him with disbelief in his eyes. "You don't want to sit with me?!"
"I didn't mean it like that-"
"You're asking me to move?!" Nicholas continues. "How could you-"
"Okay relax" Fuma stands up laughing. "Of course you can sit, it's your place. No one's sitting next to your best friend"
With that Fuma grabs his stuff, waving a hand to Euijoo before he moves over to his desk. Nicholas stood there watching him leave before turning to look at Euijoo, who sighed loudly. Nicholas sat down, smiling.
"Well hi, you didn't ask why I got late?" Nicholas asks, tapping his best friend's shoulder.
Euijoo turns to him slowly. He didn't want to say it but he was annoyed right now. The way Nicholas forced Fuma to move away from here was extremely rude and childish. And Nicholas didn't even feel like it was wrong to do that.
"What's wrong? Why are you giving me that look?" Nicholas asks.
"Why did you have to do that?" Euijoo asks.
Nicholas blinks in confusion. "What"
"I thought you weren't coming today. And Fuma was already sitting here assuming you wouldn't come. Could you not have sat at a different seat today?"
Nicholas stares at him, his lips parting with a tiny gasp. "You think what I did was wrong? This is my place! I always sit next to you"
"Would you die if you're not sitting next to me in one class?" Euijoo asks, with a frown.
"Oh wow" Nicholas scoffs, forcing a laugh. "You think I am annoying now? I thought I was your best friend"
"Nichol, you are my best friend-"
"It seems one sided though" Nicholas says, crossing his arms. "I always put you first"
"I do as well"
"Then why are you fighting with me right now?" Nicholas asks. "Are you tired of me?"
Euijoo facepalms loudly. Nicholas always jumped to conclusions. Whenever Euijoo pointed out his possessive and clingy behaviour, he would get defensive and petty.
"Just say it, you hate me" Nicholas says. "Say it you don't like me anymore and have found a better best friend. I will move away-"
"Oh god" Euijoo grabs Nicholas's arm, pulling him towards himself. "It's not that!"
"Then what is it?" Nicholas complains. "If you really wish to sit next to Fuma today then fine! I will move-"
Euijoo tightens his grip around Nicholas's arm, sighing in defeat. "Okay I am sorry! Please don't leave like this now"
Nicholas pretends to roll his eyes but the moment Euijoo repeatedly starts tugging on his sleeve, he gives in while trying to hide his smile.
"Alright since you're begging me to sit with you, I will stay" Nicholas says, turning to look at Euijoo who was staring back at him.
"Well, thank you for doing me this favour! The teacher has arrived, pay attention to the class!" He smacks Nicholas's arm, asking him to face the teacher.
Nicholas grins, sneaking one more glance at his best friend.
During lunch breaks as well, Nicholas's designated seat was next to Euijoo. No one from their group even dared to sit there because that would mean war.
One time Maki accidentally sat in that place, and Nicholas literally pushed them both apart to sit right in between.
"No one's allowed to sit next to my best friend" Nicholas had said, after he yeeted Maki to one side.
So it was an unsaid rule. Everyone in the group was annoyed by now, but for Euijoo's sake no one ever said anything.
If Euijoo let it happen then no one else had any right to make a comment on Nicholas's behaviour.
"Hey Euijoo" Maki speaks up, and before Euijoo, Nicholas's head was turned towards him, eyes already narrowing.
"Yes Maki?" Euijoo replies to him.
"I need to buy a gift for my sister. Can you accompany me?"
Before Euijoo could reply, Nicholas cuts in. "Can't you take someone else?"
Maki groans loudly, rolling his eyes. "I didn't ask you"
"Why do you need Euijoo out of everyone-"
"Yeah sure Maki" Euijoo replies smiling. "When do we have to go?"
Nicholas puts his utensils down loudly. "Hey! You never agree for any plan with me this quick!"
"Tomorrow evening" Maki says, ignoring Nicholas.
"Sure we can go right after school" Euijoo says.
Nicholas nudges his shoulder hard, to gain his attention. "Why are you ignoring me?"
"Nichol" Euijoo sighs. "I am not ignoring you, just helping him out"
Nicholas shuts up, moving a bit away from Euijoo physically. He sits in silence, aggressively hitting the metal utensils against the ceramic plate as he ate his lunch.
Their friend group sighs because this was a normal occurring. Whenever Euijoo paid the slightest attention to anyone else, Nicholas would start behaving like this.
"Nichol" Euijoo taps his arm. "Oh god stop it"
"No you go hang out with Maki" Nicholas answers, not meeting his eyes. "You have better friends to hang out with now-"
"You can come along okay!" Euijoo offers.
Nicholas immediately whips his head towards Euijoo in that instance. "Really? Can I?"
"Of course"
Nicholas's face lights up, and he returns back to sitting close to Euijoo. Maki stares at the two in disbelief before scoffing loudly.
"He's so annoying" Maki mutters under his breath, looking over at Nicholas.
"Euijoo let's get matching jewellery" Nicholas says, dragging Euijoo to a shop as Maki follows after them.
They had been going around many shops and Euijoo had been suggesting a lot of gifts for Maki's sister but then Nicholas would interrupt them, fuelling to Maki's annoyance.
"Maki I think get this jewellery set-" Euijoo words are cut off as he's pulled by his wrist towards Nicholas who drags him towards the other corner of the shop.
"I am never coming with them again" Maki groans as he asks seller to show him the jewellery set Euijoo suggested.
Meanwhile on the other side, Nicholas showed Euijoo a set of matching bracelets with a sun and moon charm.
"You should wear the sun and me the moon" Nicholas suggests, holding them in one hand.
"They look cool" Euijoo says.
"Should I buy them for us?" Nicholas asks.
"I can pay for my own-"
"No I will buy it for both of us" Nicholas decides, and before Euijoo could protest any more, he picks up the bracelets taking them to the cash counter.
Maki stood outside the shop waiting for the two to come out, checking his watch every few seconds. Euijoo walks out first as Nicholas pays for the bracelets.
"Thanks Euijoo" Maki says the moment he meets his eyes. "You helped a lot"
Euijoo blinks. "Was that sarcasm?"
"No" Maki laughs. "I just find it..funny or perhaps even weird"
Euijoo tilts his head sideways in confusion. "What"
Maki hesitates for a while before turning to look back in the shop, making sure Nicholas was still there before continuing. "Are you and Nicholas secretly dating?"
Euijoo's eyes widen in seconds, as he furiously shakes his head. "What?! No!"
"Then that's even more weird" Maki concludes, sighing loudly.
"Why would we date? That's a ridiculous assumption Maki. We're best friends since 4 years"
"Is he aware that he's your best friend and not boyfriend?" Maki asks, laughing.
Euijoo releases a breath, furrowing his eyebrows at Maki. He huffs loudly. "Of course he knows. Why wouldn't he"
"He doesn't let you breathe for a second even. Do you not feel suffocated?" Maki asks.
Euijoo sighs, looking over at Nicholas who was now shoving his wallet back in his pocket after paying. "He's just like that, demanding and clingy. I am kind of used to it now"
"But still" Maki continues, now watching Nicholas walk out of the shop smiling widely.
"What were you guys talking about" Nicholas asks.
"Nothing" Euijoo answers. "Let's leave?"
"Wait!" Nicholas grabs his arm, before reaching for his wrist. Then with one hand he pulls out the sun bracelet and puts it on Euijoo's wrist gently. He then waves his own wrist in front of Euijoo, where he was already wearing his own.
Maki claps a hand to his mouth loudly before giving Euijoo another look of suspicion. He thinks Euijoo was definitely lying to him.
There's no way they aren't dating.
Euijoo immediately frees his hand from Nicholas's hold. "Thanks Nichol"
Nicholas smiles widely before throwing his arm around Euijoo. "Let's go, come on Maki"
Maki follows beside the two, as Nicholas continued to yap random non sense into Euijoo's ears who patiently listened and nodded all the way.
"Guys I think Euijoo and Nicholas are dating" Maki says to the group one day, while the said two were missing from the table to get their food.
"Really?" Fuma asks.
"They bought couple bracelets that day we went to buy my sister’s gift" Maki says.
"Dude they are best friends, that's normal for them" Taki answers. "Perhaps you and I could get one too"
Maki rolls his eyes, no one was getting his point here. "But Taki you don't cling to me like Nico does to Euijoo"
"Because you're annoying?" Taki answers, raising his eyebrows.
"Also you're not like crazy obsessed with me, or do not mind when I sit or hang out with anyone besides you" Maki continues.
Taki pauses for a moment to look up from his food. "Now why would I do that? I am not a toxic boyfriend"
"Exactly"
Taki frowns, putting his chin in his hands. "But like they have always been like that Maki. Why are you questioning it?"
"Because they were pissing me off that day. I felt like I was third wheeling a date"
Taki snorts, which causes him to choke on his food.
"Yeah go ahead laugh more" Maki rolls his eyes. "I hope the food gets stuck there-"
"Hey guys" Euijoo arrives at the table, with Nicholas clinging to his side as usual.
Taki's face had turned red as a result of coughing hard. He glares at Maki, stepping on his foot under the table.
"Ouch, calm down man" Maki says, laughing.
K taps his hand on the table. "Oh Euijoo, I had to convey a message to you"
Euijoo stops eating to look up, and simultaneously Nicholas does too.
K looks down to reach for his bag, rummaging through it. He pulls out a folded piece of paper, handing it over to Euijoo.
"Seokmin from Section B came earlier looking for you but you were out with Nicholas. So he asked me to hand this to you" K says.
Euijoo looks at the folded piece of paper. But before he could open it, Nicholas grabs it from his hand, opening it without having any patience. Euijoo sighs, shaking his head but lets him do it.
The moment Nicholas realises what was written in it, his hands freeze in one place, with the letter. Eyes still wide as he reads the contents in disbelief.
"Pfft" Nicholas slams the paper down, before shoving it towards Euijoo. "He's asking you out, how stupid"
"What?!" Euijoo asks, not believing it. He turns the paper around to read it as well.
"Holy shit" Maki says, nudging Taki. "This is drama now"
Taki looks back and forth between them before back at Maki. "Oh god"
"Everyone has their eyes on my best friend" Nicholas says. "But too sad he's with me"
Maki chokes on his drink. "He's with you? Meaning?"
"Meaning that we're best friends!" Euijoo cuts in, panicking slightly.
"Euijoo wouldn't accept it anyway" Nicholas says confidently. "He doesn't need a date while having me"
"You're confident" K says looking at Nicholas.
"Right Euijoo?" Nicholas says, looking at his best friend.
Euijoo looks up from the paper momentarily before meeting everyone’s eyes, though he still doesn't respond which causes Nicholas to grab his shoulder, demanding an answer.
“Am I right?” He repeats, his gaze softening as he looks at Euijoo.
"So I can never have a date in my entire life?" Euijoo asks, in a serious tone now.
Everyone on the table looks up, forgetting to eat for a moment, too invested in the conversation.
"I-I didn't mean it like that now!" Nicholas says seeing the look on Euijoo's face. "But I genuinely want to know what is it that we both can't do that you need a date?"
"Umm guys do you need privacy to have this conversation" K says, sensing the sudden tension in the air.
"Well sometimes you need a romantic partner too" Euijoo reasons. "Friends can't do everything"
Nicholas lets out a small breath, as he blinks several times. He felt his stomach twist as Euijoo said those words. Him not being enough for Euijoo? And the fact that Euijoo considered having a romantic partner. "I never felt the need for that. I think my friendship with you is enough-"
"What if I don't feel that way? Then what Nicholas?" Euijoo asks.
Everyone on the table shared glances before slowly deciding to get up. All of them could sense that the conversation was going to places none of them wanted to see.
"Do you seriously need a romantic date?" Nicholas asks, raising his voice slightly, hurt being obvious in his tone. "We're like seventeen only! What’s the rush?”
"Right. So at what point will you stop being best friends with me so other people can pursue me?" Euijoo asks.
By now everyone had slowly disappeared from the table, leaving just the two of them there.
"You think being best friends with me will never get you a date?" Nicholas asks, his eyes full of hurt.
"Yes?" Euijoo answers.
"You still got a confession letter while being best friends with me!" Nicholas snaps.
"Am I allowed to accept it?" Euijoo asks. "I don't think you would let me. You can't even stand someone sitting next to me in class from our own friend group-"
"Because you're my best friend!" Nicholas shouts, now gathering attention from other people around them.
Euijoo stares at him, before standing up and grabs Nicholas's wrist to drag him out of the place since he was being too loud.
Euijoo harshly releases Nicholas's wrist once they are alone in the bathroom next to the cafeteria. He makes sure the place is empty before he shuts the door.
"Why the fuck were you shouting in front of everyone?" Euijoo exhales.
Nicholas steps closer to Euijoo, narrowing his eyes at him. "All I said was that I am your best friend! That's why I do what I do!"
"You're overly possessive about me!" Euijoo complains. "I never say it out loud but at times you don't let me breathe!"
"You don't like it?!" Nicholas says, with a gasp. "I knew it..you started finding me annoying now"
"Nichol, please don't get this the wrong way now! You know how you act!"
"I only have one damn best friend, which is you Euijoo! How can I not be possessive about you when literally everyone wants to get close to you?!"
"I wouldn't let anyone get that close okay!" Euijoo says. "You're my best friend as well"
"Then tell me, why the fuck do you feel the need for a romantic partner or date?! Why did you even consider that confession back there?"
"Because we're just friends and we can't do everything Nichol!" Euijoo expresses, loudly.
There is silence in the closed bathroom for a while. The air between them felt thick as the only sound which filled the room was their heavy breathing, as their argument went back and forth.
"So.." Nicholas starts, slowly looking up to meet Euijoo's eyes. "If we can do that stuff as well, would you stop wanting a date?"
Euijoo's eyes widen, as his heart starts beating loudly. What the fuck did he just hear?
"What?! We're best friends Nichol-"
"Okay? I know very well" Nicholas cuts him off, panic flashing in his eyes seeing the way Euijoo reacted. “But I don’t know Euijoo. I don’t like the sound of you having another person”
“Nicholas” Euijoo sighs. “I promise even if I do get a date, you will still be my number one priority. Can you stop being insecure?”
Nicholas’s chest was hurting badly. He struggles to inhale a sharp breath in, when the realisation was hitting him hard.
That he couldn’t see Euijoo getting romantically involved with anyone.
He slowly looks up to meet Euijoo’s eyes, his heart practically bursting out of his chest. Why did Euijoo even need a date? Could he not consider Nicholas for that too?
Just the thought of seeing another person get close to his Euijoo, made his chest tighten and stomach hurt.
Nicholas finally takes a deep breath in.. “Why do you even mention it in front of me? I don’t want to hear it. Stop talking about your future date” he crosses his arms. “I don’t want anyone else to get close to you”
“Alright fine!” Euijoo says. “It all started because of that damn confession letter right” he pulls out the piece of paper from his pocket and tears it up into shreds in front of Nicholas. “Fuck this”
Relief washes over Nicholas, seeing Euijoo shred the letter into pieces. His eyes light up momentarily, before he pulls Euijoo towards him in a small hug, his chin landing on his best friend’s shoulder.
But deep inside his chest, the uneasy feeling was still lingering there. If Euijoo was considering him as his number one priority, that was just as his best friend, and nothing more.
One day, Euijoo would get tired of their ‘friendship’ and look for a deeper romantic bond with someone else. Someone that could never be Nicholas, because he was just Euijoo’s best friend.
And this was the hardest pill for Nicholas to swallow.
Since that day, Euijoo felt something shift in his bond with Nicholas.
He still remembers the way Nicholas said ‘if we can do that stuff too, would you stop wanting a date?’
What did Nicholas even mean by ‘that stuff’
Couple stuff? Didn’t they already behave like a couple? Almost everyone was convinced that they both were dating.
The only thing which was stopping their platonic relationship from turning into a romantic one was perhaps, physical intimacy.
If they start getting touchy too, then the lines between their relationship would start blurring.
And Euijoo wasn’t sure if he wants something like that to ruin their friendship. He cherishes the bond he has with Nicholas. It’s one of a kind. Perhaps the bond between him and Nicholas would change if they accidentally crossed boundaries.
Although Nicholas is extremely clingy, jealous and possessive, Euijoo still loves him a lot. Even if at times he gets irritated by such behaviour of Nicholas.
He just wasn’t sure what he wanted either, but clearly after having that talk with Nicholas the other day, he already felt like things were a bit different.
And he had always been scared of this. Scared of them getting awkward with each other. Although he has no idea what exactly went wrong.
It was Saturday night, both of them had planned a study session at Euijoo’s place. It was a weekly ritual for them, but this week Euijoo was nervous about it.
Since that day in the bathroom, Nicholas had been acting kind of weird with him all week.
Like he wasn’t cracking jokes like normal, or bothering Euijoo in every class. He just silently sat beside Euijoo in his usual seat, occasionally talking whenever he felt like.
Euijoo thinks his best friend was acting out of character. Because the Nicholas he knows can’t go a minute without yapping.
He didn’t want to overthink it. Perhaps Nicholas was stressed about the upcoming exams. He often had a changed attitude during exam season.
But something about him wasn’t sitting right with Euijoo. He knows his best friend, and he knows the way Nicholas was acting recently was different than usual.
Just when he’s waiting for Nicholas to arrive, he receives a text.
The moment Euijoo opens it, he frowns.
Nicholas:
Hey sorry I can’t come today
Fuma needs me for something important
Will see you at school then
Euijoo puts his phone down with a sigh. Nicholas was definitely acting weird. Because as much as Euijoo knows the guy, he would never miss an opportunity to hang out.
And not even once has Nicholas put any plan above Euijoo.
This is weird. Euijoo thinks.
But without wasting any more time, Euijoo starts studying for the up coming exams, although his thoughts were still a mess because of Nicholas.
Monday arrived in the blink of an eye, and they had their first mid term exam. The entire weekend, all Euijoo thought about was Nicholas, and how strange his behaviour was.
Recently he had even stopped sending Euijoo silly best friend reels. On a regular basis, Euijoo’s instagram DM would be spammed, but recently Nicholas hadn’t even messaged him on that app, or sent anything.
He doesn’t recall that he did anything wrong the last time they had a long conversation, which was in the bathroom that day.
The conversation surrounded that stupid confession letter by Seokmin, and Nicholas expressing he doesn’t like the idea of Euijoo’s potential future date.
That’s all that happened. Euijoo even made sure to tell Nicholas that he would always be his first priority no matter what relationship he gets into.
Nicholas seemed fine that day and even hugged him after hearing that.
Then what exactly went wrong that was making Nicholas act like an avoidant person all of a sudden?
After the exam ended, Euijoo walks over to his best friend gently tapping his shoulder, which causes the other to flinch. Euijoo immediately retreats his hand.
This is concerning. He thinks.
“How did it go?” Euijoo asks.
“It went well” Nicholas answers, before looking down at his phone.
Euijoo frowns, folding his arms before he lets out a loud sigh. “Hey, you didn’t tell me what you were doing with Fuma on the weekend. It’s the first time you ditched studying with me”
Nicholas slowly looks up from his phone, with a blank expression. “He needed help in some concept”
“So you ditched our study session to study with him” Euijoo asks, raising an eyebrow.
“Sorry bout that” Nicholas apologies, and ends the conversation, immediately walking away from him without even telling where he is off to.
His behaviour was concerning to Euijoo now. This was so unlike Nicholas.
Usually Nicholas would cling to him, yap his ears off about the exam and then plan a coffee hang out perhaps. But the way Nicholas was kind of ignoring Euijoo was breaking his heart.
“Fuma” Nicholas calls out his name, as he’s sitting on the floor of his room. “I don’t know for how long I can ignore Euijoo”
Fuma sighs from the other corner of the room, spinning around in his chair.
A few days ago, Nicholas had showed up to his house, looking extremely stressed. Fuma never expected the other to show up to his door like that. Hell Nicholas and him barely talk because he’s always around Euijoo.
So when Nicholas requested to show up to his house to ‘talk’ about something, Fuma immediately let him in.
“I think I might like Euijoo”
Fuma just let out a long sigh, no hint of surprise crossing his face as he stared back at Nicholas.
“So did you finally figure it out?”
Nicholas widened his eyes. “What do you mean?!”
“I could always tell you like him. Your possessiveness for him wasn’t normal, do you know that” Fuma said.
Nicholas looked down, fidgeting with his hands. “I don’t know Fuma, but the thought of him having someone other than me is killing me from inside, and it hasn’t even happened yet”
“Why don’t you just tell him?”
“I tried but I don’t think Euijoo liked it. He made a weird face”
“What did you even say?”
“I asked him if we could do stuff that friends don’t do..”
Fuma facepalmed hard at his response. “That’s not how you confess dumbass”
“I don’t think he sees me as more than a best friend. Hell I think I am even annoying as a best friend to him”
“You need to properly put your feelings out there”
And now Nicholas was back in Fuma’s room, sprawled across on his floor.
“You know the last time you came here, I asked you to be vocal about your feelings to him, not ignore his ass”
“My heart starts beating so loud around him. I think he will see it through me that I am in love with him if I talk to him”
Fuma sighs loudly, looking down at him. “Have you considered how hurt he must be by you ignoring him”
Nicholas tries to think for a while. Euijoo wouldn’t get upset since he’s always irritated by him. He wouldn’t even care.
“I don’t even think he would notice”
“He’s your best friend” Fuma says. “Of course he would notice you’re being distant all of a sudden. And when he asks, what reason will you give him?”
There is silence in the room as Nicholas struggles to find an answer. He really didn’t have any excuse to give if Euijoo did end up asking. Neither can he expose himself or let his feelings out.
He grabs his head in frustration. “I don’t know Fuma. I don’t wanna ruin my friendship with him because he clearly doesn’t feel that way. But I also cannot keep it inside me”
“Take the risk” Fuma says. “If it’s killing you this bad, then being friends will hurt you more”
“Losing him as a friend will hurt more than anything if he starts hating me” Nicholas expresses, feeling his chest tighten at the possibility of his best friend hating him after finding out about his feelings.
“He’s your best friend, he wouldn’t hate you. Trust me” Fuma reassures.
Nicholas felt his stomach twist and chest tighten at the thought of possibly confessing to Euijoo. He can’t imagine the look on his best friend’s face.
His heart leaps out of his chest, when his phone buzzes with a text.
It was Euijoo. Fuck.
Euijoo:
Hey
Nico
I think I put my AirPods in your bag accidentally
Can I come over to your place to get them
??
“Oh fuck” Nicholas sits up straight. “He texted”
Fuma turns to him. “Reply?”
“He’s asking if he can come over to my place. But how do I tell him I am not home”
Fuma shakes his head in disappointment. “Go to his place instead then?”
Nicholas stares at the text message again. Should he go to Euijoo’s place instead? Because he clearly didn’t want to tell Euijoo he was at Fuma’s place right now. He would have to give a lot of explanations to him for that.
Nicholas:
I am out
I will come to your place instead
In like 30 mins
He gets a reply from Euijoo almost instantly.
Euijoo:
Oh
Okay
I ll be waiting nichol
“Fuck my life” Nicholas mutters, before forcing himself to stand up from the floor. “Thanks for letting me stay here Fuma. I know I am a mean asshole to you at times but you’re still nice to me”
Fuma puts a smile, letting out a sigh. “As long as you get those emotions out of your emotionally constipated ass and tell your best friend how you feel, I won’t beat up your ass!”
Nicholas gives him an apologetic look, while laughing as he leaves the room.
30 minutes later Nicholas was standing at Euijoo’s doorstep, hesitating to ring the bell. He’s been at his house several times, but it was the first time he was here after being aware of his feelings.
He doesn’t even know how he ended up admitting it to himself. Nicholas has had a thing for him for quite long, but he couldn’t put his feelings into words. He would get upset whenever Euijoo would laugh with someone else. His insides would burn when any of their class fellows would even put their hand on Euijoo’s shoulder.
He didn’t want to accept that he liked Euijoo in that way. Because it’s obvious things wouldn’t end up well.
Since the day Nicholas found out about that confession letter, he’s been losing it completely. It’s obvious that Euijoo would want a romantic partner some time in life. He wouldn’t always want Nicholas’s company.
And the thought that someone else would have all of Euijoo’s attention was unacceptable for Nicholas. He wants to be his number one priority, and apparently it wasn’t possible by just being his best friend.
Because Euijoo clearly said ‘friends can’t do everything’.
Nicholas wishes they were more. He wishes he could be everything Euijoo wants. He wants to be his best friend and lover at the same time. He wants Euijoo to consider him for everything. He wants to be the only person in Euijoo’s life.
Which does sound extremely selfish, but he can’t help it.
He wants Euijoo just for himself. He possibly cannot imagine anyone being that close to Euijoo.
Just the thought of any other person being physically close to Euijoo, or being the reason for his smile was enough for Nicholas to feel sick to his stomach.
After much contemplation, he finally rings the bell. His heart was practically bursting out of his ribcage, and the moment Euijoo swings open the door with a bright smile, Nicholas’s heart stops for a moment.
He gulps, before smiling back immediately. “Hi”
“Come in” Euijoo says, pulling his arm inside.
Nicholas flinches at the contact at first, which doesn’t fail to go unnoticed by Euijoo. Then he’s dragged upstairs by Euijoo who was gently pulling on his sleeve all the way up. The entire way, Nicholas could feel his heart palpitating against his chest.
The moment they are inside Euijoo’s room, he releases Nicholas’s sleeve harshly, closing the door shut.
Nicholas looks up to meet Euijoo’s eyes, which were searching for answers. Probably about his recent behaviour.
How the hell is he escaping this now.
“So now that I finally have you here” Euijoo says, leaning against the door with folded arms. “Would you mind telling me why you’re ignoring me?”
Nicholas blinks, seeing the confused yet hurt expression on his best friend’s face. Fuma was right. Euijoo did seem upset.
“I just..” Nicholas starts. He had no reason to avoid him other than his feelings which he was trying to hide. How the hell is he supposed to tell that now. “I just decided to give you space, you know. You said that day I don’t let you breathe because of my possessive behaviour”
Euijoo forces a laugh. “Are you serious?”
“What?”
“I didn’t mean that you should ignore me like this now. We’re best friends. You haven’t sent me any reel in days. Or spam texted me. Or yapped next to me in class” Euijoo sighs loudly. “For how much longer are you gonna give me this ‘space’?”
Nicholas avoids meeting his eyes. He’s totally going to end up telling everything to Euijoo. His best friend was great at cornering him and making him admit things he didn’t want to.
“Look, I did this more for myself rather than for you,” Nicholas says.
Euijoo stares at him, exhaling a breath as his eyes scan Nicholas’s expressions. He had never seen Nicholas look this nervous in front of him in the 4 years that he had known him.
“Nichol, can you look at me when you talk?”
“I can’t”
Euijoo takes a step forward, which makes Nicholas panic immediately, causing him to take 2 steps back.
“What is wrong with you!” Euijoo lets out in frustration.
“I don’t know, okay!”
Nicholas could feel his chest heaving, as he struggled to inhale a sharp breath in. He hated this. He didn’t want to admit his feelings. Everything was ruining his friendship with Euijoo right now.
He’s so scared that his heart might stop any moment.
Euijoo just stares at him, more confused than ever.
“The realisation hit me hard” Nicholas chokes out. “Like so hard”
Euijoo blinks, his eyebrows furrowing. “Nichol?”
“I thought I was just a possessive best friend” Nicholas continues, while nervously tugging at his shirt sleeve. “But then I realised that people can be romantically attracted to you..and that you would also be romantically attracted to someone someday..I-I couldn’t accept it”
“Nicholas” Euijoo takes a deep breath in, taking steps towards him while Nicholas keeps stepping back until his back hits the wall of Euijoo’s room.
Euijoo maintained a safe distance when Nicholas’s back hit the wall.
“What I am about to say..will ruin our friendship” Nicholas says, looking down. “I am so scared of telling you this because you will hate me”
“Nicholas” Euijoo reaches to grab his hand, which was shaking. “It’s not possible for me to hate you”
“You might”
“I won’t!” Euijoo argues.
“I don’t think I will ever be okay if you find someone else” Nicholas says.
Euijoo sighs, gently rubbing his thumb over Nicholas’s hand.
“I won’t find anyone else. You’re my only best friend for life” Euijoo assures him, smiling.
“That’s the thing. I am only your best friend!” Nicholas says, his voice feeling heavier. “I don’t want to be just your best friend”
Euijoo’s body freezes, his hand dropping out of Nicholas’s. “What”
It’s the same look, which Euijoo gave him that day. The look of pure confusion and perhaps dislike too.
“I think I might like you more than a best friend and this realisation has been keeping me up at night for days!” Nicholas confesses. “I like you way more than you could ever imagine. In you I found both a best friend and the love of my life”
Euijoo stands there shocked to his core, blinking furiously as he takes Nicholas’s confession in. No way.
Nicholas actually has feelings for him?
Suddenly Euijoo felt his heart beat loudly against his chest, as he stared at his best friend who finally managed to make direct eye contact with him.
“Look you don’t have to like me back” Nicholas immediately says. “It’s fine. I will get over it maybe. Or maybe not. But just..don’t hate me”
“Nichol” Euijoo calls softly, before pulling Nicholas towards himself, gently embracing him in a hug. “Please stop okay, I could never hate you”
Nicholas could feel his entire body turn stiff and burn hot, the moment Euijoo pulled him in. It was the last thing he expected. He blinks away the tears which were forming in his eyes.
“I am sorry I said weird things that day too. About wanting to do things couples do. I thought perhaps if I do that you would stop wanting other people but am just your ‘friend’ and we can’t do everything-“
“Shhh” Euijoo pulls him tighter. “You’re yapping too much again. Relax”
“I am sorry, I ruined everything-“
“You didn’t ruin anything, Nichol” Euijoo assures him, pulling away from the hug to look at his best friend’s sulky face.
“I made you uncomfortable-“
“Oh my god!” Euijoo groans, before he grabs Nicholas’s chin in his hands and kisses his left cheek suddenly, causing him to widen his eyes and shudder.
Nicholas stares back at him, eyes still wide in disbelief. “Did-did you just?! Oh my god”
“How else should I have proved to you that I am not uncomfortable? You’re yapping too much”
Heat rushes to Nicholas’s face, before he covers his face with his hands, smiling. “Oh god”
“Look, I want you to listen to me very carefully right now” Euijoo says, gently pulling Nicholas’s hands away from his face and holding them.
Nicholas looks up at him, his heart beating louder than ever, but now his insides felt warm and that constant feeling of wanting to throw up vanished too.
“We have been best friends for 4 years, I love and cherish our friendship a lot. Although you have been very annoying almost every single day, I wouldn’t want anyone else to be my best friend, because I love you for who you are” Euijoo says, his voice softer than ever.
Nicholas lets out a chuckle, smiling at him. “I knew it you find me annoying”
Euijoo shakes his head, laughing before he reaches forward to kiss his cheek again, making Nicholas turn into a blushing mess.
“I had always been scared of this you know.. us taking our friendship a step further because I didn’t know how it would work” Euijoo lets out, his tone gentler than ever. “I cherish our bond so much that I was scared if things changed we wouldn’t be the same.. so I never wanted to risk it”
Nicholas slowly nods, taking his words in.
“But really.. Nichol I don’t mind if we take our relationship a step further..” Euijoo continues. “It will surely be different and a lot of things will change but I don’t think there could be a better person for me to stay for life other than my best friend. So please don’t think you made a mistake telling me this. Because I wouldn’t have the guts to ever tell you this first myself”
“Oh my god” Nicholas releases a deep breath. “I was holding my breath the entire time. I was so ready for rejection”
“I can’t let you sulk now can I?” Euijoo teases, shaking his head while smiling.
“Huh” Nicholas raises an eyebrow. “You love me too, okay!”
“But you’re annoying too,” Euijoo complains.
Nicholas huffs before he grabs Euijoo’s chin and kisses his cheek catching him off guard.
“Yeah you’re definitely annoying” Euijoo says, his face burning hot as Nicholas peppers his cheek with kisses. Nicholas giggles, burying his head in Euijoo’s shoulder, smiling wide.
“By the way, where are my AirPods?!”
“Oh they’re back at my house. I don’t have my bag with me” Nicholas answers.
“What? Where were you even?” Euijoo asks.
“I’ll tell you later. I am too happy right now” Nicholas pulls him in a hug, before dragging them towards the bed, throwing himself on Euijoo.
“You’re kinda heavy” Euijoo complains, but doesn’t push him off. Nicholas sighs before rolling off and pulls Euijoo over him instead, gently wrapping his arms around his waist.
“Princess is happy now?” Nicholas says, tilting his head sideways.
“Annoying ass” Euijoo says, blushing as Nicholas pulls him closer, their faces inches apart.
Nicholas stares at Euijoo’s lips before meeting his eyes. Was it too early for this? Should he ask Euijoo if they can kiss?
Euijoo leans down to kiss his cheek again before pulling away, his entire face tinted red, as he breathes onto Nicholas. There was barely any distance between them, and it was extremely hard for Nicholas to resist at this moment.
He took huge risks tonight, why not this one?
“Hey” Nicholas says, his voice lower than usual. “Can..can we?”
Euijoo’s gaze flickers over to his lips before he stares back into Nicholas’s eyes.
“Can we kiss? If you’re okay with it? I mean no pressure-“
Euijoo laughs. “You’re such a loser”
Nicholas pouts. “I am trying to take your consent into consideration okay!”
“Okay Nico” Euijoo blushes. He was still completely pressed on top of Nicholas, as they lay on his bed. “We can”
Nicholas widens his eyes, totally not expecting the reply. He moves his face closer to Euijoo, until their noses were touching.
The room suddenly felt smaller, and Nicholas could feel his hands sweating. It was too hot in here, and having Euijoo this close to him was making him feel suffocated.
"Look, it's the first time I am doing it," Nicholas says, as he gently places a hand on Euijoo's cheek. "Don't judge me if it's bad"
A small smile forms across Euijoo's lips when he sees the visible nervousness on Nicholas's face. "It's mine too, don't worry"
Then without another word, Nicholas slowly leans in, hesitating to actually close the gap between them. For a few seconds, he stayed inches apart from Euijoo, just breathing against his lips while trying to gather courage to go for it.
"Why are you hesitating now?" Euijoo says, in a shaky breath against his lips.
Nicholas gulps, before he moves his hand to the back of Euijoo's neck and finally moves forward to connect their lips.
The moment Nicholas finally kisses him, Euijoo feels his stomach twist. The feeling was so foreign that it was giving him butterflies.
Nicholas meanwhile, kisses him like he was waiting for this day since the past 4 years. He starts slowly, placing soft kisses on his lips before he opens his mouth to envelop Euijoo's bottom lip in between his lips.
Euijoo breaks apart for a second, and Nicholas takes that as his chance to grab his shoulders and flip their positions around, getting on top but makes sure to not put his entire weight on him, since Euijoo found him heavy.
Nicholas kisses him again as he leans down and gasps against his mouth while trying to nibble and suck his lips. One of Euijoo's hands moves up to grab Nicholas's shoulder, gripping his shirt tightly.
Euijoo shifts underneath Nicholas, who gently slips his hand inside Euijoo’s shirt, holding his bare waist in his hands. The touch was sending shivers down Euijoo’s body, since it was the first time he was being this physically intimate with someone. And that someone being none other than his best friend.
Nicholas smiles into the kiss, as his hands roam around Euijoo’s body, completely forgetting himself in the moment. This was the best thing he had ever done. Kissing his best friend was perhaps the most memorable thing in his 17 years of existing. He trails his lips lower onto Euijoo’s neck, placing gentle kisses all the way till he reaches his Adam’s apple.
“Nichol” Euijoo moans, gripping Nicholas’s arm tighter. Nicholas places one final kiss on his neck before moving back to capture his lips eagerly.
They kiss for so long that they aren’t able to keep track of time. Nicholas refused to let go of Euijoo, until he could feel his best friend running out of breath. That’s when Nicholas pulls away, kissing the corner of his lips before lifting himself up, placing his hands on either side of Euijoo. They both were panting hard, completely out of breath after devouring each other.
Nicholas stares at Euijoo, who was flushed red as he took deep breaths while looking back at him.
"So.." Nicholas asks, still gasping for air. "Did you like it?"
"I-" Euijoo pants. This was the craziest shit he had done in his life since middle school. Back then the craziest thing was him bunking school to go eat ramen with Nicholas.
But losing his first kiss to his best friend on a random Thursday was not something he ever saw coming his way.
It was completely insane. "Nichol"
"Would you like it if we do this often?" Nicholas asks. “You think I can be more than just a best friend to you?”
“You’re still stuck up on that” Euijoo laughs, reaching to grab Nicholas’s cheek with one hand. “I would love it. You are more than just a best friend. Stop saying stuff like that now”
For the first time in days, Nicholas felt at ease. He could finally breathe in peace, knowing his best friend was always going to be his person.
He pulls Euijoo completely against himself, deciding to just not go home tonight.
Perhaps he made the best decision, to take the chance.
“Well congrats I guess” Maki says, when he spots the two best friends turned into boyfriends in the campus cafeteria the next day.
Nicholas was holding one of Euijoo’s hands under the table, while grinning like an idiot the entire time.
“Nicholas you should thank me” Fuma speaks up. “I was there for you in your hard time”
“You really were,” Nicholas says, looking at him. “I am sorry for that time I acted bitchy with you because you were sitting with Euijoo. You know I had a reason-“
“Bla bla bla” Maki slams his hands on the table. “The reason being that you’re gay for your best friend”
Nicholas sticks his tongue out at Maki, almost throwing something at him but Euijoo immediately grabs his arm pulling him back. And of course, Nicholas would immediately melt in Euijoo’s hold within seconds.
“I hate couples,” Taki says from the other side of the table. “I mean Nicholas was insufferable before too, but now Euijoo seems equally annoying”
“Don’t you dare call my boyfriend annoying, I will get your ass-“
“Okay!” Euijoo pulls Nicholas back to stop him from starting yet another fight.
“By the way Euijoo” K speaks up. “What did you do about Seokmin’s confession? Did you reply to him?”
Nicholas rolls his eyes at the mention, immediately looking away. Euijoo sighs, grabbing Nicholas’s hand in his own, as if that would calm him down. It was obvious he didn’t like Seokmin being mentioned, especially now that Euijoo was dating him.
“I tore the letter into pieces,” Euijoo says, which earns a loud ‘huh’ from both Maki and Taki.
“You’re insane,” Taki gasps.
“If I was Seokmin I would have cried myself to sleep” Maki adds in, looking over at Euijoo.
“There was no need to give him any hope, since someone else had my heart all along” Euijoo says, shyly turning his head to look at Nicholas who was still sulking, not meeting his eyes.
Euijoo sighs, seeing the way Nicholas was behaving. He was mistaken to think that Nicholas would be less sulky, possessive and jealous after the confession. But unfortunately he was the same.
“Okay stop sulking now” Euijoo says before grabbing his chin with one hand and places a kiss against his lips, making everyone at the table go wide eyed at the sudden action. He slowly pulls away, hand still on Nicholas’s cheek while smiling.
Nicholas gasps loudly at the unexpected kiss, staring at Euijoo in disbelief who was blushing after pulling that. Nicholas could feel his entire face, neck and ears burn hot.
“Oh my” Nicholas says, breathlessly.
“Please never do that in front of us” Maki says, covering his eyes. “Have some respect for the single community”
“I agree” Taki agrees. “Get a fucking room”
Euijoo ignores everyone’s comments, holding Nicholas’s hand once again under the table, rubbing his thumb over his palm. Nicholas couldn’t help himself from grinning like an absolute lovesick idiot.
“I love you” Euijoo leans in to whisper in his ear.
“Oh god they’re so annoying” K groans this time, looking away from the annoying couple putting up a cringe romance show for everyone to watch.
Nicholas giggles slightly, turning to look at Euijoo before leaning in as well to whisper in his ear. “I love you more”
And just like that, they became the most insufferable couple of the friend group, and perhaps the entire class’s too. But Nicholas was glad they put an end to being just friends. Although it was one of the scariest things he had ever done, he's glad he decided to take the risk, for the better.
Because what they have now, was something Nicholas always wanted. Byun Euijoo was his 2 in 1. Boyfriend + Best friend. And he was lucky to find both in one person.