Work Text:
“Hello everybody my name is markiplier.” Said the famous YouTuber ever, markiplier. Suddenly, the smartest person ever to have lived, Sheldon Lee cooper(you dawg!!) jumps in Markiplier’s room.
“Markiplier! We need to save the world from the evil asuka from evangalion cause she’s wreaking havoc in Gotham city! We need to stop her!” Sheldon put on his gloves and dragged Markiplier outside of his room to see Eva unit 02 crashing buildings and eating them like it was ramen noodles(like in the uhn-i-meh)
“I’m a little confused, young Sheldon. Why do we have to stop Asuka? She’s just eating.” Markiplier stupidly asked. Of course, young Sheldon, his trusty sidekick, rolled his eyes and answered.
“We have to stop Asuka because she’s being controlled by the spectre(from forsaken) to eat buildings. Get with the times mark and get into your superhero costumes.” Young Sheldon opened his briefcase and handed Markiplier the costume. Markiplier groaned and did a 360 tornado kick and turned into magical girl sailor pliers(sailor moon+ that fgteev song that goes like “now why on earth in the toilet are there pliers”)
“Alright….let’s do this!” Magical girl sailor pliers squeaked and used their powers to turn into a larger version of themselves. Then they started beating up the Eva but the Eva fought back. “Oh no! The Eva’s too strong, I can’t defeat it on my own!…I need to call in the big 5(that one Tik tok video that everybody hated)” Magical girl sailor pliers charmed and grabbed out his Nintendo 3ds mid fight. A punch from the Eva was about to pass but Magical girl sailor pliers shushed them as the big 5 was on the other side of the phone. When the call finally ended, the Eva immediately threw an uppercut to Magical girl sailor plier’s face, making them fly up into the sky and never to be seen again. Sheldon, the whole time, was hiding behind a trashcan, waiting for the big 5’s arrival. Suddenly, Sheldon’s iPhone 16 started ringing.
“SHELLY, YOU GET YOUR BUTT DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW. WHO SAID YOU COULD GO OUTSIDE EVEN THOUGH YOU WERE GROUNDED? I’LL TAKE AWAY YOUR PROFESSOR PROTON.” His mom, Mary cooper, yelled. Suddenly, the Eva spotted Sheldon(No surprise) and before they could grab Sheldon and throw him into outer space, the big 5 showed up and beat up the Eva with it’s larping powers, saving Sheldon and traumatizing asuka with the pain of a spear going through her eye. The end.