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Tim was always dragging me out of the house during the summer, and today was no exception. Late this afternoon, he had knocked on my door and beckoned me to come with him to this field in town that we likely weren’t supposed to be in, and he wouldn’t even tell me why he wanted to go so badly. I couldn’t possibly say no, not when he was looking at me like he was, so I decided to tag along with him.
Now, we’re almost finished walking to the field, and Tim still won’t answer me when I ask why he’s taking me here. We reach the end of the trail where it opens up into a large field, and I look at Tim, who had apparently already been staring at me when I wasn’t looking.
“So, now will you tell me why we’re here?” I ask, walking farther into the wide open space.
Tim doesn’t say anything; he just loosely follows me while looking down at his feet.
“Dude, just answer m—“ Before I can finish speaking, Tim lunges at me, tackling me to the grass and throwing lazy, playful punches at my torso. Great, he brought me here just to fight him. Even though I’m a bit disheartened, I still fight back, trying my hardest to flip him over to no avail. Tim could probably beat my ass if he wasn’t just playfighting with me, and even now he’s sort of beating my ass anyway.
I finally manage to roll him over, putting as much weight on him as I can and attempting to block his punches as best as I can. As soon as I have him pinned down, though, he finds a way to get back on top of me and (I’m assuming) accidentally hits me pretty hard in the chest, knocking the wind out of me.
The only words I can choke out in my newly winded state are “Ow— Tim, stop.”
Luckily, those words seem to do the trick because Tim immediately stops his constant jabs at me and opts to sit next to me instead of on top of me.
“Nick, are you okay? I’m really sorry, I didn’t mean to actually hurt you,” Tim panics, and I can’t even say anything back because I used the last of my breath to tell him to stop. The only thing I can do is let out a few wheezing laughs, resting both hands on my chest, watching his expression turn into relief rather than concern.
Tim starts to laugh nervously, laying down beside me and sighing, “Oh man, I really thought I killed you or something.”
My breathing starts to return to normal and the second I can speak, I wheeze out, “You really kicked my ass there, Tim,” and lazily sock him in the arm.
“I guess I did,” he replies, giggling even more. Tim has this big, goofy smile on his face that he always seems to have. I never understood how his mood can change so fast.
“I think I owe you something after that,” Tim laughs, slowly sitting up. “You stay right here; I’ll be back.”
And just like that, Tim is gone. I’m hoping he’ll bring me something nice, like a Pepsi or something. I could really go for a Pepsi right now.
It’s been what I think is two hours since Tim’s left me here, and the sun has gone farther down quite a bit since then.
I’ve been passing my time by lying down and watching the clouds and pulling out individual blades of grass from the ground, just waiting for him to come back. Just as I’m thinking about all this, though, I start to hear footsteps behind me. Veering my head around, I see Tim walking toward me holding a clump of assorted flowers that he’d picked. Not exactly what I thought he’d bring me, but I’m not complaining.
He quickly places the flowers on my lap and sits down next to me, pulling his knees to his chest and staring at me.
“Aw, cool, thanks man,” I chime, examining the flowers that were placed on me.
Tim’s smile fades into a frown, face turning red as he looks down at the ground. Did I do something wrong? Why is he so sad?
“Hey, c’mon Tim, don’t be so mopey; I like them, I promise, I really do.”
He doesn’t respond. Even though he’s hiding his face by now, I can still see his eyes getting all watery.
I awkwardly rub my hand on his back, scooting a bit closer to him. “Please don’t cry, I don’t wanna see you cry.”
“I’m sorry; I’m just being dramatic. You didn’t do anything bad,” Tim lifts his head up from his knees to look at me, sniffling and clearly holding back tears.
He calms down a bit as I continue to run my hand along his back, stopping his sniffles. We just sit there in silence for a while; nothing really needs to be said between us. Tim looks really nervous. He hasn’t stopped fidgeting with his fingers since he gave me those flowers, and I can tell that there’s something serious going on in his mind. Despite Tim being a complete dumbass most of the time, he can be a very complicated dude when he wants to. The silence isn’t making me feel any better either, because he's looking more and more nervous by the minute, and I don’t have any idea what to say. That would be different if I knew what was wrong, but Tim hates telling me things like that. He wouldn’t tell me what’s bothering him if he had a gun to his head.
“Nick, have you ever kissed anyone?” Tim asks, completely out of the blue.
“I mean, yeah. Why?”
He looks down at his feet again, now scratching the back of his neck, which is one of his nervous habits. After a few seconds of this, Tim lunges toward me again, but this time he isn’t tackling me, he’s kissing me. He presses his lips to mine, our teeth awkwardly bumping into each other, and he immediately pushes his tongue into my mouth. This should feel wrong, but it doesn’t. The only thing that's even slightly bothering me is the fact that I can tell that he’s never kissed anyone. I drop the flowers in my hand to rest it on the back of his neck, pulling him in closer, slowly beginning to kiss back. Tim’s mouth amateurishly eats at mine, leaving his saliva around my lips, and if I’m being honest, I’m not that good of a kisser either. He doesn’t even seem to mind anyway, we’re both just leaving a mess on each other’s faces. Tim pushes his face into mine one more time before pulling away, making a soft, high pitched moaning noise while doing so. Another dumb smile spreads across Tim’s face as he looks at me with half lidded eyes, looking very proud of himself.
“That was my first,” He says out of breath, moving his hand to mine.
It’s my turn not to respond now, because I’m still processing what just happened. I just kissed my male bandmate. I just kissed my best friend. I don’t like guys at all, or at least I never have before this, but this was different. Strangely, that kiss felt more pleasing than any kiss I’ve had with a girl, even if it was horribly awkward.
I slightly look away and wipe Tim’s spit off my mouth before asking, “Can we do that again sometime?”
Tim’s face immediately lights up when I say that, responding happily, “We can, only if you want to.”
A sigh of relief leaves my mouth as I lay down on the grass, looking up at the late evening sky. The stars are just starting to show, and some fireflies are already out, which means that the bats are going to be here soon. Everything is so calm that it’s making me drowsy, and Tim’s warmth beside me is lulling me to pass out even faster, slowly shutting my eyes and succumbing to the urge to sleep. I’m definitely not going to be home by curfew tonight.