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Penny is unable to sleep as her mind replays the other day like a broken record. She tries to count sheep, even lies down at the opposite end of her bed. Neither of those aid in her overactive mind’s punishment.
She sees Ocean the next morning, looking like she was just on the cusp of her heat, and when Penny talks to Constance, she confirms Ocean had never known she was an omega. Penny had figured that much when she left the closet and spent the night beating herself up over her actions.
Constance hadn’t known about Ocean either, and when Penny told her about what happened over a call that lasted a while, Constance promised to watch after Ocean. Penny knew the only other person she could trust was Ocean’s best friend.
Penny was relieved that someone was in her corner for once, but trying to sleep after seeing how much Ocean was being affected by her heat made it impossible for Penny not to lurk and watch over Ocean.
Penny lets out a frustrated growl, shoving her covers off and sitting up in her bed. She wasn’t going to get any sleep tonight. She gets out of bed and slips on her shoes, tucking her hair into the hood of her hoodie before leaving her room. She isn’t allowed to leave the building, but there was at least a common room she could sit in, away from the confining space of her dorm.
She made her way downstairs, she was certain she was the only person on the top floor. The bottom floor wasn’t somewhere she liked to hang out, too close to the exits, and she felt too tempted to leave whenever she was down here.
In the common room, Penny is surprised to find the light on. Turning the corner, she is met with Misha sitting on a brown leather couch.
She has never talked to him, let alone known he was in the same building. Misha stuck to himself, face always illuminated by his phone. Penny knew he was only in the choir as a punishment, too. She didn’t have any information on why he was put there, just that he had done something to anger the school.
Misha glances up at her as she rounds the corner. They stare at each other before Misha sits up and nervously runs his hand through his hair. He looks like he just came out of an NSYNC poster.
“Yo, Penny! You live here too?” He tilts his head, brown eyes filled with surprise. Penny notices immediately that nothing in his eyes screams ‘disgust’. If anything, it’s curiosity shining within them.
Misha rests back against the couch, smiling up at her. She hesitates to answer, looking around to see if there might be anyone else in the area. All she hears is the guard outside, walking past the window, ignoring the two and instead backtracking to the other side of the building.
“Yes?” She doesn’t know why it comes out as a question. She is confused, yes, but even she can understand why the two were the only ones in this building.
“Dope, top floor?” He glances down at his phone for just a second, sighs, and puts it away to give Penny his attention.
“Yeah, they wanted to prevent me from climbing out of my window…barred it up and everything.” She hates this school with a burning passion, but she wouldn’t try anything after getting put on house arrest for sneaking out to visit Ezra.
“Is messed up, yeah?” Misha scoots over, tapping the seat beside him. An open invitation; Penny never saw Misha so friendly before.
“It is…uh, what are you doing up?” She has never seen him down here before, but it wasn’t unwelcomed. Misha never looked at her like an abomination. It was a nice change of pace.
Misha sighs once more, shaking his head as if he is trying to get rid of a thought.
“Waiting…” He trails off, getting a far away look in his eyes. He tenses up when Penny finally sits beside him.
Curiosity gets the best of her and Penny pulls her knees to her chest, resting her head on them. “Waiting for what?”
Misha nervously pulls out his phone, checking it before giving Penny a long look, searching for something on her face. He shakes his head before taking a deep breath.
“My fiancée. She is in Ukraine…it’s her rut week.” He reveals, staring into Penny’s soul, waiting for her reaction.
“Her rut week…” Penny was certain Misha was an alpha…which meant…oh.
“Is there problem?” He asks, still waiting for Penny to say something. She had seen alphas with other alphas in Elysium. It had never been a taboo for her. Most relationships in Elysium had been loving and fulfilling.
“What? No, no…nothing wrong with that!” Penny holds herself tighter, looking at Misha with a relieved sigh. “So, she’s a female alpha?”
Misha smiles, satisfied with Penny’s answer. She never knew Misha was so progressive. He kept to himself and stayed out of other’s business.
“Yes, very beautiful woman, Talya. I have goal to move back to Ukraine soon. Is slow process.” He lets out a sigh. Pulling out his phone, he shows Penny his lock screen, on it is who she assumes is Talya, hair in braids with a sunflower held close to her chest. She is gorgeous, and Penny feels herself smile.
She was so in her head, and only now did she have a moment to think about something other than the shame that struck her every time she thought of Ocean.
“She is gorgeous… I hope you can get back to Ukraine soon.” Penny wishes others had the same love for alpha women as Misha did. The look in his eyes when he looked at his phone, like he had never thought anything awful about his fiance. Penny wants to be looked at that way, to feel like she wasn’t born someone to be looked down on.
Ocean had looked so scared when they got locked in the closet, chest heaving, eyes frantic. Only when her mind was overtaken by her heat did she soften, becoming pliant and willing to give Penny whatever she could want.
Penny had only wanted to comfort her, to press herself close and keep Ocean safe from any harm. Ocean’s sweet floral scent had intoxicated her. It made her feel so hazy, unable to think about anything but being wrapped up in it.
“You okay?” Misha places his hand on Penny’s shoulder. She flinches away, not used to someone touching her, an unfamiliar feeling for her after being so isolated from everything and one she knew.
Misha immediately pulls his hand away, apologizing profusely for touching her. Penny wants to hide the truth and not tell him if she’s okay. Penny glances at Misha, taking in the way his shoulders tense, a passion in his eyes keeping the fire of his heart burning bright. She wants what he has, the peace of knowing he will be with his fiance someday must be nice.
It was different for her… Ocean was just within reach, Penny could keep a close eye on her. If Misha could handle being thousands of miles away from his love, she could only hope she could handle the feeling of being so close but not being able to reach out.
“I’ll be okay…” She thinks about how Ocean must be feeling right now. Penny can only imagine how afraid Ocean is. She once again tears herself up thinking about the way Ocean had looked so afraid when Noel found them.
Penny doesn’t think it’s smart to tell anyone else what happened with Ocean—Constance only knew because Penny couldn’t lie about how she found out Ocean is an omega. Noel caught them… Penny hopes he keeps his mouth shut, but she doesn’t know him well enough to fully trust him.
She watches the others in the choir, sees how they interact and speak to each other. The softness Constance gives Ocean on her hard days, even when Constance herself is struggling; a trained eye could see just how hard she was on herself too.
Constance treats everyone with respect. She and Ricky sign back and forth, conversations only Penny could also understand. Noel clearly knows some ASL, but not as much as Constance. It was strange to watch all of them interact, and only Constance really paid attention to Ricky, chiming in when he had something to say and telling the others so he wouldn’t need to type it all out.
Penny saw just how much the beta appreciated Constance’s friendship, inviting her over for sleepovers and movie nights. Sometimes, he invites Noel over, too. Noel has yet to accept the offers, blushing and declining—he makes the excuse of work, even though they all knew he works weekends and had plenty of time to hang out beforehand.
Misha was like her, sat in the back, his face was illuminated by his phone. Penny has caught him smiling a few times, only for him to wipe it off his face when he noticed someone was watching.
Noel and Ocean have a complicated relationship. Their academic rivalry often caused problems for the choir. She always wonders why they couldn’t get along, so similar, both having big personalities that hid the real person underneath.
Even with all the people watching, Penny is incapable of joining in on the conversation. The fear of being turned away, ridiculed, and made to feel inferior causing her to remain quieter than she wanted.
“Yo, Penny… Is okay to be sad.” Misha leans back, getting a good look at her. He must be able to smell the sadness on her. His eyes bright and cheery as he smiles at her. She can’t help but let out a humorless laugh.
“I know that. It’s just been a really long day.” She has more than just a long day to worry about. Ocean is in heat, and knowing the overachiever, she would not be taking days off school to isolate and handle her heat alone.
Penny sighs, pushing herself up off the couch.
“What would you do if you couldn’t help someone physically, but still wanted to do something to calm them?” She nervously plays with the stings on her hoodie, not making eye contact with Misha.
“Give something that will help…omegas like things that smell nice, no?” Misha says after a beat. Penny’s face warms. She was hoping he wouldn’t pick up on why she was asking.
“Right…yeah, thanks.” She pulls at the strings again. Her eyes widen with an idea. “Really, thank you! Have a good night, Misha. I have something I need to do.”
Misha raises his brows, but his attention turns to his phone as it began to ring. “No problem! Talya calls, Goodnight, Penny.” As he gives his farewell, he readies to answer the phone.
Penny hurries out of the common room, hearing the beginning of his conversation before she’s fully out of earshot.
“Привіт, мій соняшник–”
Penny runs up to her dorm, swinging the door open and quickly opening her nightstand. She pulls a bottle out of it and sighs. It’s a low dose of scent enhancers. Contraband in her hands, but the perfect thing for the idea she has.
If she couldn’t help Ocean by physically comforting her, she would just have to ensure she had something to cling to when she wasn’t there. It was a longshot that Ocean would even accept the offer, but Penny needs to do something before she went insane and has to lock herself away.
Spraying herself, she lies down in bed and lets her own scent fill her room. Penny would make sure her hoodie was completely saturated. Somehow she would get the hoodie into Ocean’s hands, and she knew just who to ask.
Selfishly, Penny’s alpha instincts told her Ocean needs to be covered in her scent. She wouldn’t let another alpha's scent calm Ocean, not when it was clear Ocean is comforted by Penny’s scent.
She pulls out her phone and stares at the name of the last person she texted. Constance was surprised by Penny’s text, and gasps filled the call that followed, with Ricky even chiming in at one point.
Penny groans. She knows it was a bad idea, stupid to assume Constance would help. She knows Constance has some unresolved feelings about her. The difference is that Constance never looks at her with disgust like their other peers.
“Alpha up, Penny. It’s just a small gesture of good faith… a really dumb gesture.” She whispers to herself, clicking Constance’s name and sending one more late-night text.
“Hey, Constance… I have a favor to ask.”
To her surprise, Constance answers immediately
“Why are you up? >:( but, what can I do for you?”
Penny chuckles, not expecting Constance to worry about the hour she is up at, especially when Constance is also still up. She shakes her head and tries to ignore the way her heart softens. Constance may not be her friend, but it was appreciated that she still showed her kindness.
“Help me with Ocean. I have a gift, and we both know she won’t take it if I try to approach. And you’re one to talk, what are you doing up?”
While she waits for Constance to answer, Penny sits up and begins to bite at her nails, trying not to gnaw on her arm. She was so afraid of what could happen to her, or to Ocean, if things didn’t turn out okay. Penny has never felt so feral before. Even when she was tearing into Johnny Moon’s face, she had not been so primal.
She wants to chase after Ocean, pull her into her embrace and not let her go until she knew Ocean was able to think clearly and safely walk through the halls without alphas taking double looks.
Penny nearly attacked someone today after an alpha whistled at Ocean. He was lucky Ocean had turned to him and glared daggers into him.
Brrrrrt
“I can help, yes… also, I’m babysitting my little brother. He won’t go to bed, so I’m up making sure he doesn’t get into anything…you?”
The conversation continues for a while until Penny passes out. A plan set up for the next day, she can only dream that it ends well.