Chapter Text
It all started with sex. The one thing Buck’s actually good at started this entire mess. Well, it didn’t start it, but it’s how he found out about it. Ok, let’s start from the very beginning.
Buck had gone out to a club, like usual, and while he was there, he met this beautiful woman who was so kind–she also kind of reminded Buck of Eddie, but that wasn’t the point. It turned out that the woman’s name was Sarah.
Buck and Sarah hit it off immediately. Buck learned that Sarah wasn’t just a beautiful woman on the outside, but a beautiful woman on the inside as well because she was a veterinarian. And Sarah learned that Buck was more than just a perfect body because she learned that Buck was very intelligent as well as a kind soul.
It was after their first month together that everything started. It was actually their one month anniversary, which probably makes it worse. They’d just had a date night and everything.
Anyways, the couple had gone out to a fancy restaurant for their one month before going home to have some fun. During their alone time, Buck had started to feel…something. He’d felt weak, tired, and light headed, but he’d pushed himself, chalking it up to this being his first time doing it in a few months. Though, this hadn’t happened the last time he’d been on a withdrawal.
After they’d finished with their…extracurricular activities, they’d just laid there, cuddling as they came down from their respective highs. They’d been laying there for a good fifteen minutes before Buck made a move to get up, Sarah wrapping her arms around his waist to stop him, mumbling her disapproval.
“I’m just gonna get a wash cloth and some clothes…and maybe some new sheets,” Buck told her, gently tugging himself free from her grasp before leaning over and kissing the top of her head.
She propped herself up on her elbows, watching as Buck slipped on some loose basketball shorts due to the slight chill in the room. He smiled at her as he picked up a pair of underwear and a t-shirt before throwing it at Sarah, who’d just groaned before laying down, the clothes resting on her stomach.
She closed her eyes as she listened to Buck’s footsteps begin to turn towards the door. Suddenly though, she heard a thud. It sounded like something heavy hit the ground, but Sarah couldn’t think of what that heavy thing could be.
“What was that?” she asked, opening her eyes as she stared at the ceiling. She was met with silence, it was as if Buck had just vanished. The woman quickly pulled on her underwear and t-shirt she’d been given before calling out, “Buck?”
She finally propped herself up on her elbows, looking around to see if the man was in the room. She didn’t see him, so she pushed herself to the end of the bed, looking down at the ground as she prepared herself to stand on weak legs. That’s when she saw him.
“Buck!” she screamed, scrambling her way off of the bed and to Buck’s side.
Buck was passed out. His eyes were closed, his breathing was shallow, and he was pale. Sarah stared at the man for a minute before she realized that she should probably call 911. She quickly scrambled to her feet, making her way to the nightstand where she’d put her phone.
She picked it up and immediately dialed 911, putting the call on speaker, so she wouldn’t have to hold it to her ear, as she made her way to Buck’s side once again. She took his hand in hers, sending out a silent prayer for him to be ok.
Her call was answered a moment later. “911, what’s your emergency?” the dispatcher, a man who sounded like he was in his thirties, said, his voice calm and collected, ready to help someone in distress.
“M-my boyfriend,” Sarah choked out as tears started to run down her cheeks. “H-he collapsed. I-I don’t know what happened! H-he was just going t-to get some things from the other room, b-but then h-he…he collapsed.”
“Alright. Ma’am, can I have your address, so I can send help?” the dispatcher asked, trying to get help to the woman as fast as possible.
“Uh, 3…3982 Canis Heights Drive,” Sarah said, trying to calm herself down by taking deep breaths. That’s when she turned to her boyfriend and gently started shaking him. “Please, please, baby. I need you to wake up.”
“Ok, I have help en route,” the dispatcher said, drawing in the woman’s attention once again. “They’re only a few minutes away. Now, who am I speaking to?”
“I-I’m Sarah, and m-my boyfriend’s name is E-Evan,” the woman choked, rubbing her boyfriend's arm as she prayed for him to open his eyes.
“Ok, Sarah. I’m Josh, and we’re gonna help your boyfriend, ok?” the dispatcher, now identified as Josh, said, a calm and steady tone of voice.
“O-ok,” she said, swallowing as she stared at the face of a man who was so lively only moments earlier.
“Sarah, can you check Evan’s breathing, and his pulse?” Josh asked, and Sarah began to nod before she remembered that he couldn’t see her. God, this would be so much easier if he could see what was going on. “All you need to do is put your hand in front of his mouth and nose, and tell me if you feel any air. Can you do that?”
“Y-yeah,” Sarah said, adjusting her position so she could put her hand in front of Buck’s face. He was breathing, but the amount of air she felt being pushed out from his lips felt excessive. She moved her hand to his neck as she looked for his carotid. She found it, and she found that his heart rate was a little faster than what was supposedly normal. “U-uh, his breathing seems kind of l-labored, a-and his heartbeat is k-kinda fast.”
“Ok,” Josh said, the sound of keyboard keys clacking filling her ear. “Sarah, I’m going to add one of the firefighters who’s on their way to help to this call. Is that ok?”
Sarah responded with an affirmative as Josh added the firefighter. “Eddie?” the dispatcher asked, supposedly asking for the firefighter.
“Right here,” the man responded, his voice rougher than Josh’s and a tightness to his voice that seemed to be caused by worry.
“Sarah, Eddie is going to ask you a few questions, so he can get a feel for what they’re walking into when they get there,” Josh informed, trying to sound calm, but Sarah could hear the underlying panic.
“O-ok,” she responded, hoping it would ease the dispatcher a little.
“Sarah, what can you tell me about what happened to…Evan before he collapsed?” Eddie asked, his voice extra tight when he said Evan. Sarah didn’t know why, but she brushed it off for later examination.
“U-uh, we had sex…um, but that was over ten minutes before he got up. Before he got up, we were just cuddling. The last thing he did before he collapsed was pick up some clothes off the ground,” Sarah recounted, trying to sound as calm as possible–she could do this, she could help Buck.
“And was he acting weird while you two were…having sex? Like was he acting differently than normal?” Eddie asked, seemingly having to force the question out of himself.
“Uh…it was actually our first time,” Sarah confessed, an apologetic undertone to her voice.
“Ok,” Eddie said, pausing before talking again. “Was he acting differently than he normally does personality wise or anything?”
“Um, h-he was more tired today, but he h-had a long shift at work yesterday. Uh, h-he also slept in until like noon after f-falling asleep at eight last night,” Sarah explained, taking Buck’s hand in hers and squeezing.
“Got it,” Eddie said, seemingly through gritted teeth. “We’re a few seconds out. We’ll be there to help you guys in a second.”
“Thank you,” Sarah croaked, hearing the sirens as they approached the house.
“Of course, it’s what we do,” Eddie said before going silent, the sound of sirens even louder now.
It was only a moment later that there was a banging on the door, the firefighters trying to get in. Sarah so desperately wanted to stand up and run to the door, so they could get in, but she couldn’t will herself to leave Buck’s side. It only took a few seconds for the firefighters to realize and kick the door in–or at least that’s what she assumed they did, turns out Eddie just used his spare key.
A tall brunette man, who Sarah recognized from pictures Buck had shown her, was the first inside. He moved quickly and efficiently around all of the boxes Buck had still yet to unpack. He was moving like he’d walked this path several times before–and considering that this man is Buck’s best friend, Sarah wouldn’t doubt that he had.
The man was in the bedroom and kneeling right next to Sarah within seconds. He set down his med kit and immediately had his hands on Buck, checking his vitals. “His BP is slightly elevated at 125/80,” Eddie declared before putting his fingers to Buck’s carotid. The man looked like he’d burst from the concern he was holding back. “He’s tachycardic! Pushing 500 mL of saline.”
Eddie worked quickly, taking Buck’s arm and flipping it so he could see the veins in his wrist. He didn’t make Sarah let go, which she was grateful for. She watched as Eddie sterilized Buck’s wrist with a wipe before putting in an IV.
Eddie then surprised Sarah by saying, “Hold this.” He’d handed her the bag of saline. She just swallowed and held it so it was elevated while Eddie continued to check Buck for what could’ve caused him to collapse.
At this point, the other firefighters had made it in the house and to the room, but they stood back, giving Eddie room to work, seemingly knowing that he wouldn’t welcome their assistance.
“How’s he doing?” one of the firefighters who had a captain helmet asked, he looked so worried that you’d think Buck was his brother or something–Sarah would later learn that this man was indeed Buck’s brother-in-law.
“Stable, for now. He had a slightly elevated BP, and he’s tachycardic, so I pushed 500 mL of saline,” Eddie explained as he moved so he was sitting on his knees, so he could lean over Buck properly. He quickly checked Buck’s pupils. “His pupils are dilated, but they’re still reacting to light. I’m going to check to see if he responds to pain.”
Eddie put his hand on Buck’s breastbone, using his knuckle to rub against the area. Buck began to stir, groaning at the uncomfortable feeling. Eddie smirked a little. “Patient responds to pain,” Eddie said, turning his head to look at his coworkers, who smiled at him. “Hey, come on, Buck. Wake up for me,” Eddie said, rubbing Buck’s breastbone one more time before the man began to blink his eyes open.
Buck was bleary eyed as he began to look around the room, his eyes adjusting to the light. He’d barely spared Sarah a glance when his eyes suddenly turned to Eddie, focusing a little more. “E-Eds?” Buck asked, question slurred, but there was something akin to hope shining behind Buck’s eyes.
“I’m right here, Bud,” Eddie responded, rubbing up and down Buck’s forearm. “Chim, Hen. Get me a C-collar and backboard.”
“Already here,” the woman, who Sarah assumed to be Hen, said as she and the man, Chim, stepped out of the way, letting a few other firefighters move forward. One gave Eddie a neck brace that Sarah recognized as a C-collar–she did watch some first responder shows.
Eddie made quick work of the brace, securing it around Buck’s neck. Then, Eddie and a few others helped to get Buck onto a backboard. “E-Eds?” Buck asked again, this time seeming like he had a question to ask his best friend.
“Someone get the gurney,” Eddie said before turning his head, so he was looking at Buck. “What’s up, Bud?”
“C-can you hold my h-hand?” Buck asked, and he looked scared as he stared at Eddie. “L-like you did wh-when I got my leg cr-crushed?”
“Your girlfriend’s already got that covered, Bud,” Eddie said as he continued to stroke Buck’s forearm.
Buck shifted slightly, his hand moving a little awkwardly. “I-I can’t feel it,” Buck said, his breathing picking up and tears springing to his eyes. Eddie froze, glancing from Buck’s hand back to his face.
“Can you feel anything? Tingling, pins and needles? Or is it just like completely numb?” Eddie asked, gently moving Sarah’s hand from Buck’s hand to his thigh as he checked Buck’s hands.
“N-numb,” Buck responded, closing his eyes as fear took hold of his body.
Eddie gently bent one of Buck’s fingers back. “Do you feel this?” Eddie asked, getting a shake of the head in response. Eddie then scratched Buck’s hand with his nails. “How about this?” Another shake.
Chim and Hen came back with the gurney right as Eddie took Buck’s hand in his own and squeezed. “It’ll be ok, I promise,” Eddie said, gently rocking Buck’s arm to show him that he was holding on. He turned to his friends then. “He can’t feel his hands.”
“O-or my feet,” Buck added, bringing Eddie’s attention back to him. “Th-that’s one of the reasons I f-fell. M-my feet were tingly, and I got d-dizzy.”
“Ok, well. Let’s get him to the hospital as fast as possible,” Chim said as he and Hen made their way to help Eddie lift the backboard. Sarah was still holding the bag of saline, so she stood as they lifted Buck onto the gurney. She stayed sort of dazed for a while. She barely registered the ride to the hospital.
She was so worried about Buck.
God.
Ali was right. Dating a firefighter was hard, but dating Buck was harder.
{--)<`>(--}
Buck had fallen asleep sometime during the ride to the hospital, that was one thing he was sure of because the next time he woke up, he was laying in a hospital bed staring at the sterile white walls and bright fluorescent lights.
Buck groaned as the soreness of his muscles began to sink in. He closed his eyes again as he threw his head back. The pain wasn’t anything he wasn’t used to, but the tingling in his extremities was definitely new along with the vertigo he was feeling.
“Hey, Bud,” Buck heard Eddie’s familiar voice call from his side, causing Buck to turn his head and open his eyes as he looked at his best friend.
“Hey,” he responded, voice coming out a little hoarse from dehydration, causing Buck to begin coughing, which didn’t help with his dizziness, only causing him a headache.
Eddie was at his side within seconds, handing him a cup of water like the saint he is. Buck shook his head, hoping Eddie would understand that he wasn’t refusing the water but trying to tell him that he couldn’t take the water. Somehow, someway, Eddie understood, nodding before lifting the cup to Buck’s lips.
Buck parted his lips and Eddie tilted the cup. The action felt domestic in a sense, like Buck was Eddie’s hurt spouse or something, and Eddie was taking care of him. Speaking of spouses: where was Sarah? Not that she’s his spouse or anything! They’ve only been together for a month, but she’s still his partner, so thinking of spouses made him think of his partner!
“Where's Sarah?” Buck asked after he swallowed the water. Eddie’s expression fell, his warm smile replaced by a sour look, as if he’d unexpectedly eaten a lemon–which Buck still couldn’t understand: how do you accidentally eat a lemon?
Eddie set down the cup of water on the little table next to Buck's bed. Buck just watched as he did so, admiring the way his jaw flexed–he wasn't thinking of the connotations behind his reaction to the question, only paying attention to the reaction and how hot Eddie looked.
“She–uh,” Eddie said, starting before cutting himself off. Eddie sighed, burying his head in his hands and groaning before speaking again. “She left, Buck.”
Buck blinked at his best friend, his brain short-circuiting. He’d only been half-paying attention to what Eddie was saying, most of his attention focused on his face and the way he looked.
“W-what?” he stuttered out, confusion taking over his features. What was Eddie talking about? What did he mean when he said she left? Buck’s stomach dropped more and more as the silence droned on. “Eddie,” Buck all but pleaded.
Eddie sighed before reaching out and taking Buck’s hand in his, causing his stomach to completely leave his body. She’s abandoning me like everyone else does, he thought to himself. They always leave, everyone does.
His parents left him a long time ago. Maddie left him for fucking Boston–even though she came back, she only came back because she needed him. Chim had left at one point, physically and emotionally, when he’d run to find Maddie–Buck didn’t blame him, but still, it hurt. Hen had left, not him specifically, but she’d still left. Christopher left, Eddie following suit–”Don’t make me choose between you and my son.” –again, he didn’t blame either of them, but they’d left him. Bobby left, unwillingly, but he’d left.
But they all came back, well his parents tried, but he didn’t let them. They’d all left him at some point and come back, but it wasn’t Buck they came back to with open arms, it was those they were closest to. Even Eddie didn’t go to Buck immediately, he’d gone to Hen and Karen when he got that job back in El Paso, after Bobby’s funeral. He knew that the intentions he had were good, but that didn't do anything to stop the voice in his head.
“She said that it was too much to bear,” Eddie said, regret clear in the way he spoke. His eyes were full of emotion, one Buck recognized well. “I’m sorry, Buck.”
He swallowed before asking his question. “Did she say she wanted to end things?” he asked, portraying no emotions.
“Not yet,” Eddie admitted, keeping eye contact with Buck. “But she said she would end it once you were out of the hospital.”
Buck sighed as he leaned his head back against the scratchy hospital pillow that was anything but comfortable. Everyone leaves.
He laughed. “At least she was willing to wait until I was out of the hospital, yeah?” he said, turning his head to the side slowly with a smirk on his face as he met Eddie's gaze. His eyes looked like those of a kicked puppy, and Buck felt bad for making his best friend worry about him so much.
“That's a pretty low standard, Buck,” Eddie said, shaking his head in disbelief at Buck’s standards.
“Yeah, I know,” he responded, closing his eyes as the vertigo started to set in again. His extremities were still tingly, but it wasn't as bad as before–it seemed to be fading.
“You okay?” Eddie asked, moving so his hand was resting on Buck's forearm, causing him to blink his eyes open and give him a reassuring smile.
“Just some vertigo,” he said honestly.
Eddie rubbed his hand up and down his forearm. “How's the numbness?” he asked, medic mode activated.
Buck liked Eddie's clinical side–it was really hot–but it wasn't his favorite thing to have directed at him because he can't lie to Eddie. “It's reduced to tingling. I can feel them now,” Buck assured as he moved his hand and placed it on Eddie's knee.
He was sure this was just a fluke, something small. He'd be fine. Everything would be fine. Sure, he'd lost his girlfriend due to…whatever was wrong with him, but she wouldn't have stayed even if this hadn't happened, that he's sure of.
He just needed to find someone who liked his quirks as well as his character in general. He hadn't found that person yet, but he was sure that if he kept looking, he'd find them.
Maybe he'd start searching after a nap. Yeah, that's it. He'll take a nap and then get back on the prowl.
He really hoped Eddie wouldn't be mad that he fell asleep in the middle of their conversation.