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Going on a rollerskating date was mentioned by both Ryan and Naim multiple times since they got together. It had always seemed like a silly idea they’d come back to every now and then, especially since Naim had never skated before, and always assumed he wouldn’t be capable of it.
They never thought they’d be able to do it, to show themselves like that in public. They knew that, most likely, nothing bad would happen if they showed themselves as a couple, but they still felt some sort of pressure to hide.
"We’re not any different from the other couples, why should different rules apply to us?" Ryan would say all the time, and Naim knew he was right. They weren’t different, even if some people stared or whispered or laughed when they saw them. When people reacted, they’d just hold onto each other’s hands tighter than normally, and kiss their anger away later.
Naim still found himself going back to the memory of the first time Ryan did that. A group of people their age shouted at them when they were walking down the street holding hands. Ryan held onto Naim’s hand so tightly Naim felt him cut off the blood flow to his fingers. When they locked themselves in Naim’s room later, Ryan started kissing him with such softness they ended up making out for hours on his bed.
Since that day Naim didn’t really mind being laughed at, and neither did Ryan.
The rink was surprisingly empty, the only people there not paying attention to anything but themselves. They both felt some sense of relief seeing the amount of space, having wholeheartedly expected a big crowd and prepared themselves for the worst.
“You know where we should go first? The photobooth,” Ryan didn’t even wait for Naim to reply, just immediately started heading in the direction of the photobooth. Naim imagined them in it quite often, actually. Every couple that comes to the rink uses it, sometimes to take photos, sometimes to kiss, sometimes both.
The booth was tiny, they barely fit inside it, but that was the best thing about it. The first photo was pretty normal, they looked like the best of friends, sitting close together, smiling wide.
On the second, it was clear they weren’t just friends, hands wandering, Naim looking at Ryan’s lips, Ryan looking at Naim’s.
On the third, there was really no room for any doubt on who they are to each other. It was nearly impossible to tell where Naim ended and Ryan started, which hands belong to who. They stopped caring about how the photos would turn out or about the possibility of someone seeing them. All that mattered is that they were together, touching, kissing, smiling.
They didn’t even realize when the photos had finished being taken, they were too absorbed by each other, focusing only on feeling each other with all of their senses. Tasting lips, smelling clothes, hearing quiet laughs and breaths, touching skin, seeing either nothing at all or just each other.
“Well, I guess that’s off the bucket list, then?” Naim laughed, arms still wrapped around Ryan’s neck. They quickly grabbed their photos - one piece of film went straight to Ryan’s pocket, one to Naim’s, and went to put on their skates, faces still flushed pink from the kisses.
Their first moves in the skates were difficult, so incredibly difficult. Naim still had one of his arms wrapped around Ryan’s neck, and Ryan held onto Naim’s waist as tightly as he could, most likely leaving finger shaped marks on the skin. Naim steadied himself with the hand that wasn’t touching Ryan, bracing himself against the wall as they attempted to start skating.
Unfortunately, moving forward even the smallest distance was nearly impossible when they were focused not on skating, but on holding each other. They had to minimize their physical contact to just holding hands, but that was still better than nothing.
Naim was struggling, really struggling. His legs seemed to develop a mind of their own whenever he tried to move them, and he ended up just getting dragged around by Ryan, who didn’t let go of him even for a moment.
“Let go of the wall,” Ryan turned around so he was fully facing Naim, holding both of his hands now, his voice gentle and soft. “Bend your knees, and try gliding, alright? Here we go.”
Naim tried to move his legs just like Ryan showed him to. It was still incredibly difficult, but he enjoyed every second of it, feeling Ryan caress his hands with his thumbs as they did lap after lap around the rink, holding onto each other even when they didn’t need it anymore.
“See? You got the hang of it, I knew you would,” As soon as Ryan said that and lightly loosened his hold on Naim’s hands, Naim stumbled forward. He tried to rescue himself with no result, knocking both of them to the ground - Ryan landing on his back, Naim on his stomach, right next to Ryan. “... Not bad for a first time.”
Naim heard someone laugh near them and a wave of hot flashes ran over him, making him sweat. He couldn’t gather the courage to look up, see if someone was laughing at them or if he was just being paranoid. It doesn’t bother him all that much when people laugh, that’s a fact. Despite that, it always creates a pit in his stomach that he can’t quite seem to get rid of.
“Naim, Naim, come on, you almost had it, let’s go,” Ryan instantly helped Naim get up, noticing the worry on his face. He leaned in and whispered directly into Naim’s ear. “Focus on me, ignore those assholes. Don’t let them ruin your mood.”
Ryan wrapped his arm around Naim’s waist and helped him get up. Naim would have been able to get up on his own, but the look in Ryan’s eyes told him that he just wants to show him off, to prove that he doesn’t care about the judgemental looks people give them. He slowly moved his hand up and down Naim’s waist, occasionally slightly pulling his shirt up to feel the warm skin under it.
Ryan had, Naim learned quite early in their relationship, a thing for showing off what’s his. Even before they first went out in public together, Ryan could never keep his hands to himself if there was a good chance they’d be caught. This may have been their first date in front of a crowd, but that doesn’t mean Ryan had never kissed or hugged or touched Naim publicly. He had. Many, many times, and Naim loved every second of it.
“You’re overthinking it.”
“I’m not,” Naim was overthinking it.
“You are, it’s all over your face,” Ryan lightly patted Naim’s cheek saying this. “When you’re overthinking something, you look like you’re gonna throw up. You’re letting them get to you.”
“I don’t want people to stare at us like that.”
“People aren’t staring, you just think they are,” Ryan took Naim’s hand and gracefully spun him around, hoping to distract him from his train of thought. Even if it didn’t fully work, it made Naim giggle and blush, his entire face and ears turning bright pink. “You’re so cute when you’re blushing.”
They were in the middle of the rink now, both of them being able to comfortably skate without having to constantly hold on to something. Ryan way more confident than Naim in his movements, but Naim had made huge progress from the moment he stepped onto the rink.
“Look at you, you got it so quickly. See, I told you that you’d be good at it, and you didn’t believe me. You should believe in yourself more, Naim.”
Naim put his hands on Ryan’s waist, pulling him even closer than he already was. Ryan saw the intention in Naim’s dilated pupils, pink cheeks, wide smile and felt it in the way his hands held him in place, making sure nobody could ever take him away. Ryan put one of his hands on Naim’s shoulder, lifting the other one up to his cheek, gently stroking it with his thumb.
“I love you,” Whenever Ryan said it, it sounded like the most obvious thing in the entire world, as if there was no room for any other possible scenario where he doesn’t. The first few times either of them had said it, their voices were filled with uncertainty, it was rushed, quiet, full of worry that someone would interrupt their moment. Naim didn’t hear even a hint of that in Ryan’s voice. It was soft, but he still managed to sound so, so sure of his words that Naim felt himself melt against the hand gently touching his face.
“I love you too,” Right as Naim said it, he pulled Ryan in for a quick, but still sweet kiss. He could feel the eyes of so many people on them, but his desire to be with Ryan in that moment turned up stronger than any anxiety he was feeling at the very same time. People would stare anyway, he would feel the judgement in their looks every day, but he wouldn’t be able to kiss Ryan in the middle of the rink despite those looks every day, so why not do it?
After that short moment they proceeded to race around the rink, gently pushing each other around, not paying attention to who ends up faster, because that wasn’t the important thing in this. The small touches were important. The laughter, the time they spent together, the smiles on their faces that said We’re definitely going to do this again soon.
When they took their skates off, neither of them could walk properly. They held onto each other tightly, giggling, whispering sweet things that the people walking past them could definitely hear. They sat on their bikes and rode in the direction of the sun in silence, smiling wide.
They stopped at the intersection where they knew they would have to part ways. For some time, they just stood there, simply looking at each other, filled with nothing but love and pride.
“That was fun,” Ryan was the one to speak, breaking not only the silence but also the distance between him and Naim. His curls looked nearly golden in the setting sun, Naim had felt them under his fingertips so many times that he knew exactly how soft they’d feel. Now he understood why Ryan always felt the need to touch him as much as possible when they were out somewhere together. He was fighting that urge now as well.
“Yeah… I’d love to do that again, actually. It was better than I expected,” Naim wrapped his arms around Ryan. He wanted to spend more time with him more than anything else in the world, but he couldn’t. He had to go back home, to his mother, who he wasn’t quite sure would react well to their relationship. He clung onto their last moments together that night, his body memorizing what Ryan felt like against him when he slid his hands through his hair, holding him, his lips curling into a smile, brushing against Naim’s forehead as he said the three holy words again. Naim knew he’d never get tired of the sound of them coming out of their mouths, no matter how many times they’d say them to each other.
“I’ll see you tomorrow. Be safe, alright?” Letting go was the hardest thing Naim would have to do in his life, the cold of the wind hitting him fully now. They both got on their bikes and drove off in their respective directions, waving for as long as they could see each other.
Looking into the sun, Ryan felt his heart grow and glow, thoughts consumed by Naim, constantly circling the warmth of his skin, the faint smell of cigarette smoke on his clothes, the way his entire face seemed to get softer whenever he looked in Ryan’s direction.
In that moment, Ryan knew he wanted to spend all of his life with Naim, and he was sure Naim felt the very same way.