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A Nudge in the Right Direction - A Good-End Oneshot TADC Crackfic

Summary:

What if Pomni was able to save Jax from his suicide attempt.
Just a crackfic I slammed out in three and a half hours last night.
The Amazing Digital Circus episode 9 is required watching for this. Seriously.

Notes:

Jax is a tragic character. He's the definition of a cautionary tale. I feel bad for him, despite all his terrible, horrible actions. I don't condone, or excuse any of them. What he did was awful. He drowned himself in bad choices and toxic coping behaviors. And the reason I feel bad for him still is because he could have done better. She could have been happy. Despite everything Jax did, the people around him were still willing to reach out. Ribbit would have supported him. Ragatha tried to help him. Pomni tried to reach out to him. But Jax was so deep in his pit by that point that he decided there was no climbing back out, and so he just kept digging. Kept repeating the loop of self-hatred, self-isolation, and cruelty to others. It pushed people he cared about –people who cared about him, too– to suicide. Eventually it would lead to his own as well. When he approached Pomni in episode nine, I believe that could have been a turning point. If Jax had truly commited to reaching out, or if Pomni had been more persistent, he might have been able to turn things around. It would have taken time, and it wouldn't undo the pain he'd caused, nor should the people he hurt have to forgive him, but he could have changed for the better and redeemed himself.
But that would never come to be.
And we all know what came of it.

 

. . .

 

But what if it hadn't happened that way. What if Jax was given the nudge he needed, right when he needed it most.

(yes, I'm still emotionally processing the finale. please ??? this crack fic I wrote in 3 and a half hours starting from midnight to help me cope)

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

 






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m-  "-Can we talk?"

The words hung in the air. Jax blinked. That wasn't what he'd meant to say. It was, but he wasn't going to say it out loud. Why had he said it out loud? And now she was looking at him. And she was going to say something.

"Uh, y-yeah! Of course. Wwwhat did you wanna talk about?" Pomni replied.

Jax stared down at her, face slack. He didn't want to do this. It was too much. He couldn't.

"N-v- Nm-" His mouth wasn't coorperating. Why wasn't his mouth cooperating. He didn't want to do this anymore! She was staring up at him with a pitying (worried, slightly confused) expression like he was some pathetic lost puppy. He couldn't stand it.

"Just f- something on my mind." His mouth ran on it's own again. Why was this happening, why now of all times!?

"Alright. Do... you wanna come sit with us?" Pomni asked in that awful (kind), demeaning (genuine) tone she always took when she was pitying (concerned for) someone.

"Tch. Look, I'd rather n- talk alone." What the fuck was happening to him. Why was his mouth mutinying against him like this? And why was she looking at him like some kind of freak (like he mattered)!?

"Oh, uh. Yeah, of course," she said.

Despite everything in him wanting to run away, to distance himself, Jax walked with Pomni to a secluded part of the circus. The two of them stood awkwardly together. He could feel her eyes on him. He refused to reciprocate.

"So..." Oh god, she was really doing this right now. "What is it that you wanted to talk about?"

Jax refused to speak. He refused to even breath. If he couldn't keep his damn mouth from blabbing stupid sappy shit he just wouldn't let it run at all. Even if it meant- Oh no. Jax let his breath go, but his eyes popped out anyway, quickly returning to their sockets as he took a gasping breath.

"Woah! Hey!" Pomni exclaimed, jumping back. "I- Are you okay? Did- Did you just want to show me what happens when you hold your breath??"

"I'm fine! Just- shut up, it was an accident. Forget it, this was stupid anyway," Jax growled. Deep down, he was actually scared. It made him want to crawl out of his skin.

He turned to walk away, but his legs refused. He was starting to panic, tugging on his legs in a desperate bid to force them to work.

"Hey, it's... I didn't think it was stupid. No stupider than mine anyway," Pomni said from behind him. He felt sick. He didn't want to hear his. He didn't want to deal with this.

"I won't tell anyone if your not comfortable with it. I promise."

Jax froze. Memories raced through his head. Things he really didn't want to think about anymore. Why'd she have to sound so much like her.

Her voice was so honest, sincere. It had to be a whole bunch of crap. He knew that. But some small part of him...

Jax settled into a nuetral pose, back still facing Pomni.

"Look, if... if there's something else you wanna talk about... You can do it when you're ready. Just come find me."

Jax's teeth were grit so hard it hurt. He was trying –and failing– to hold back his tears. He couldn't bear to say another word. He knew she'd hear the weakness in his voice if he tried. So instead he just walked away, never turning back to look at her.

Once Jax was alone, he scrubbed the tears out of his eyes with his gloves until they stopped, and let himself sit leaned aginst a giant monochrome toy block. That had been the most awful thing he'd had to experience in this god-forsaken place. Not since-

He was never talking to her again. He decided right then and there. He wasn't going to let her pry into him like it was her business.

. . .

And yet, Jax felt just a little lighter than he had in years.




"What do we do now?" Ragatha asked, barely a whisper.

"What can we do?" Zooble replied. "Of course he'd do this. Of course he'd wait until there's nothing we can do about it. That's just so-!... God-damn it Jax..."

Zooble turned away, walking up to the wall and punching it. Their plastic hand made an innefective clack sound against the plastic wall. They sat down next to Gangle, who had her legs folded up to her chest, her arms wrapped around herself.

Pomni and Ragatha stayed at the balcony, having their own conversation. Eventually they hugged, crying into each other's arms for a bit. They both needed it bad.

Then they went off in their own directions, to do whatever it is they felt they needed to do next.




Pomni crept into the bedrooms hall, revolver in hand. He was there, standing at one particular door.

Jax noticed Pomni, and turned to face her. Without hesitation he charged. And without hesitation Pomni aimed, and fired.

One shot after another, she took out each ligh in the hall one by one until the only light left was the glow of abstracted eyes. Jax stared down at her, blinking. He was confused, but calm now. Pomni didn't hesitate, lunging into him and wrapping her arms around the nexk of his abstracted form. She closed her eyes shut and focused on what she wanted.

It was psychedelic, a kaleidescope of colors and light. It was disorienting, overwhelming, but at the same time peaceful. Pomni reached out-

She was in a dark room, only visible by the soft glow of the outline of the floor and ceiling, and the doors lining the walls. Each one a slightly different color. Each of them depicting and messy sketch of Jax's face. One boarded and chained.

Pomni reached for the closest one and turned the knob. The door creaked as it fell away, revealing Jax standing in the bedroom hall, color now returned.

A scene played out. Jax stood in front of Ragatha's door. Her face crossed out. His hand was gently placed next to it. Pomni stood to his left, looking timid. She offered him help. She offered to talk. But it wasn't her words. It wasn't her mannerisms. And as she continued talking, the words became nothing more than parody of words that weren't hers.

He turned to her, and lept on her, hands wrapped around her throat. Her face wasn't changing colors. It only turned blue.

And then he let go again.

She stumbled back, terrified. And he mocked her. She ran, and he stayed.

Jax turned to look at the viewer, and the door slammed shut in Pomni's face.

Pomni was forced back, and moved on to the next door. Another scene played out, this time is was Zooble who had had asbtracted. Gangle, once again wearing her manic mask, was organizing the funeral. Jax showed up, dressed in the same maid outfit from the suggestion box adventure. The two of them argued. Gangle fell to her knees speechless. Jax made a flirtatious comment.

Pomni closed the door.

She tried the boarded one next, the face scratched away. But it didn't budge, so she tried another.

Another scene played out. Gangle was the one who had abstracted. The hall was warped and distorted. Zooble appeared, made a cartoonish mockery of themself. Jax was the funny one. The door slammed shut in Pomni's face.

She tried the final door. behind it was just another room, the previous three Jaxs sat around a table in the middle playing cards. In the corner, another was playing piano. He looked timid. Behind him was another door. The real door to Jax's room.

"How the hell'd you get in here?" maid dress Jax asked. "We have a strict 'no girls allowed' policy."

"Why are you wearing that? I wouln't be caught dead wearing that," violent Jax said.

"I'm wearing it ironically. That way it shows just how little I care," replied maid dress Jax.

Piano Jax chimed in. "Don't forget about me! I can play the piano!"

"You know, if you have to say you can play the piano, it makes it seem like you can't actually play," maid dress Jax replied.

"Yeah! Just shut up and play!" violent Jax shouted hurling a bottle at piano Jax's head. It smashed against the wall behind him, and he went back to playing, now fearfully.

"Is that what you really think of us, back there?" Pomni asked from the doorway.

"Oh that? Whooo knows! Everything's way more fun when you play it out in extremes!" cartoon Jax replied, lauging.

"That's not... reality, though," Pomni said.

All three of the Jaxs at the table replied at once, overlapping each other with responses ranging from lackadaisical to scornful.

"Yeah! I mean, killing off the comic relief character? What a freakin' drag! This whole episode's been nothing but wah wah wah! Where's the levity?" cartoon Jax added.

The boarded door thumped, so softly it was nearly inaudible.

Every Jax at the table immediately turned and screamed in unison. "Shut up!"

Just as quickly, they went right back to their game of cards.

"Where's the real Jax?" Pomni asked.

"You're not gonna get anywhere asking questions like that. Now scram, you're-" cartoon Jax was cut off by a second thump. The room fell silent again. All three Jaxs stared at the door. They returned to their game without a word this time.

Pomni didn't answer, simply walking up to the door at the back of the room. The handle wouldn't turn.

"Do any of you have a key to this door?" she asked the trio at the table.

"Nope! And even if I did, I wouldn't give it to you. You women need to learn to quiet prying all the ti-" maid dress Jax replied scornfully, but he was cut off as a bottle thrown by Pomni made him disipate into smoke.

"Wow! I hope that doesn't also happen to me!-" cartoon Jax disapated as well. He was quickly followed by violent Jax, who didn't speak a word.

Only piano Jax was left, no longer playing. It was only then that Pomni noticed the shackles chaining him to his piano. Silently, he held out the key to Pomni and nodded. As soon as she took it, he too disapeared.

Pomni unlocked the door, and let it swing open onto darkness. And then she was in Jax's memories.

Running away.

Sleeping in an abandoned building.

\̴̮̺̩̀̂A̸͇̘̤͑a̷̞̯̒̇{̸͓̥̬̏̅1̷̯͗?̷̦͔͊̐̿/̴̳̠̓̑͌b̴͓̌́͗C̵̭͙̱̅̓̍!̷́̇ͅ!̶̫̽͆}̸̝͕͑͑͜Ä̵̞͚͍́á̷̜͜!̸̢̓̀̓0̶̲͆{̸͕̓̐?̷̥͛/̵͈̠̒̑\̸̨͒́b̴̞̥̅B̷̙̋͐}̵͕̻̟̽[̵̮̲̓͝!̵̞͑͗ͅ2̴͚̈́a̶̯̹̓̃ͅ2̸̯͎̺͆̓2̵̛̀ͅ1̷͚̅́}̵̺̗̓[̴̾͐̓ͅ

Arriving in the circus.

\̴̮̺̩̀̂A̸͇̘̤͑a̷̞̯̒̇{̸͓̥̬̏̅1̷̯͗?̷̦͔͊̐̿/̴̳̠̓̑͌b̴͓̌́͗C̵̭͙̱̅̓̍!̷́̇ͅ!̶̫̽͆}̸̝͕͑͑͜Ä̵̞͚͍́á̷̜͜!̸̢̓̀̓0̶̲͆{̸͕̓̐?̷̥͛/̵͈̠̒̑\̸̨͒́b̴̞̥̅B̷̙̋͐}̵͕̻̟̽[̵̮̲̓͝!̵̞͑͗ͅ2̴͚̈́a̶̯̹̓̃ͅ2̸̯͎̺͆̓2̵̛̀ͅ1̷͚̅́}̵̺̗̓[̴̾͐̓ͅ

The other people there try to comfort him. He pushes them away.

\̴̮̺̩̀̂A̸͇̘̤͑a̷̞̯̒̇{̸͓̥̬̏̅1̷̯͗?̷̦͔͊̐̿/̴̳̠̓̑͌b̴͓̌́͗C̵̭͙̱̅̓̍!̷́̇ͅ!̶̫̽͆}̸̝͕͑͑͜Ä̵̞͚͍́á̷̜͜!̸̢̓̀̓0̶̲͆{̸͕̓̐?̷̥͛/̵͈̠̒̑\̸̨͒́b̴̞̥̅B̷̙̋͐}̵͕̻̟̽[̵̮̲̓͝!̵̞͑͗ͅ2̴͚̈́a̶̯̹̓̃ͅ2̸̯͎̺͆̓2̵̛̀ͅ1̷͚̅́}̵̺̗̓[̴̾͐̓ͅ

Slowly he gets used to the circus. He makes friends. Things are good.

\̴̮̺̩̀̂A̸͇̘̤͑a̷̞̯̒̇{̸͓̥̬̏̅1̷̯͗?̷̦͔͊̐̿/̴̳̠̓̑͌b̴͓̌́͗C̵̭͙̱̅̓̍!̷́̇ͅ!̶̫̽͆}̸̝͕͑͑͜Ä̵̞͚͍́á̷̜͜!̸̢̓̀̓0̶̲͆{̸͕̓̐?̷̥͛/̵͈̠̒̑\̸̨͒́b̴̞̥̅B̷̙̋͐}̵͕̻̟̽[̵̮̲̓͝!̵̞͑͗ͅ2̴͚̈́a̶̯̹̓̃ͅ2̸̯͎̺͆̓2̵̛̀ͅ1̷͚̅́}̵̺̗̓[̴̾͐̓ͅ

Ribbit's room. The air is calm. The conversation becomes personal. Ribbit opens up. She convinces Jax to do the same. Jax ends up in tears.

Ribbit places her bowtie on his ear.

Jax smiles. She's truly happy.

The doorbell rings. Jax throws the bow to the ground. He's scared again.

\̴̮̺̩̀̂A̸͇̘̤͑a̷̞̯̒̇{̸͓̥̬̏̅1̷̯͗?̷̦͔͊̐̿/̴̳̠̓̑͌b̴͓̌́͗C̵̭͙̱̅̓̍!̷́̇ͅ!̶̫̽͆}̸̝͕͑͑͜Ä̵̞͚͍́á̷̜͜!̸̢̓̀̓0̶̲͆{̸͕̓̐?̷̥͛/̵͈̠̒̑\̸̨͒́b̴̞̥̅B̷̙̋͐}̵͕̻̟̽[̵̮̲̓͝!̵̞͑͗ͅ2̴͚̈́a̶̯̹̓̃ͅ2̸̯͎̺͆̓2̵̛̀ͅ1̷͚̅́}̵̺̗̓[̴̾͐̓ͅ

Jax pushed Ribbit away. He does the worst thing anyone can do to someone in the circus.

He makes her feel unwanted. Unloved.

\̴̮̺̩̀̂A̸͇̘̤͑a̷̞̯̒̇{̸͓̥̬̏̅1̷̯͗?̷̦͔͊̐̿/̴̳̠̓̑͌b̴͓̌́͗C̵̭͙̱̅̓̍!̷́̇ͅ!̶̫̽͆}̸̝͕͑͑͜Ä̵̞͚͍́á̷̜͜!̸̢̓̀̓0̶̲͆{̸͕̓̐?̷̥͛/̵͈̠̒̑\̸̨͒́b̴̞̥̅B̷̙̋͐}̵͕̻̟̽[̵̮̲̓͝!̵̞͑͗ͅ2̴͚̈́a̶̯̹̓̃ͅ2̸̯͎̺͆̓2̵̛̀ͅ1̷͚̅́}̵̺̗̓[̴̾͐̓ͅ

It comes to a breaking point on the mountain adventure. Ribbit finally gives up.

\̴̮̺̩̀̂A̸͇̘̤͑a̷̞̯̒̇{̸͓̥̬̏̅1̷̯͗?̷̦͔͊̐̿/̴̳̠̓̑͌b̴͓̌́͗C̵̭͙̱̅̓̍!̷́̇ͅ!̶̫̽͆}̸̝͕͑͑͜Ä̵̞͚͍́á̷̜͜!̸̢̓̀̓0̶̲͆{̸͕̓̐?̷̥͛/̵͈̠̒̑\̸̨͒́b̴̞̥̅B̷̙̋͐}̵͕̻̟̽[̵̮̲̓͝!̵̞͑͗ͅ2̴͚̈́a̶̯̹̓̃ͅ2̸̯͎̺͆̓2̵̛̀ͅ1̷͚̅́}̵̺̗̓[̴̾͐̓ͅ

He keeps pushing her away. He's isolating her from everyone.

\̴̮̺̩̀̂A̸͇̘̤͑a̷̞̯̒̇{̸͓̥̬̏̅1̷̯͗?̷̦͔͊̐̿/̴̳̠̓̑͌b̴͓̌́͗C̵̭͙̱̅̓̍!̷́̇ͅ!̶̫̽͆}̸̝͕͑͑͜Ä̵̞͚͍́á̷̜͜!̸̢̓̀̓0̶̲͆{̸͕̓̐?̷̥͛/̵͈̠̒̑\̸̨͒́b̴̞̥̅B̷̙̋͐}̵͕̻̟̽[̵̮̲̓͝!̵̞͑͗ͅ2̴͚̈́a̶̯̹̓̃ͅ2̸̯͎̺͆̓2̵̛̀ͅ1̷͚̅́}̵̺̗̓[̴̾͐̓ͅ

Jax can't bring himself to knock on her door.

\̴̮̺̩̀̂A̸͇̘̤͑a̷̞̯̒̇{̸͓̥̬̏̅1̷̯͗?̷̦͔͊̐̿/̴̳̠̓̑͌b̴͓̌́͗C̵̭͙̱̅̓̍!̷́̇ͅ!̶̫̽͆}̸̝͕͑͑͜Ä̵̞͚͍́á̷̜͜!̸̢̓̀̓0̶̲͆{̸͕̓̐?̷̥͛/̵͈̠̒̑\̸̨͒́b̴̞̥̅B̷̙̋͐}̵͕̻̟̽[̵̮̲̓͝!̵̞͑͗ͅ2̴͚̈́a̶̯̹̓̃ͅ2̸̯͎̺͆̓2̵̛̀ͅ1̷͚̅́}̵̺̗̓[̴̾͐̓ͅ

Jax can't bring himself to knock on her door.

\̴̮̺̩̀̂A̸͇̘̤͑a̷̞̯̒̇{̸͓̥̬̏̅1̷̯͗?̷̦͔͊̐̿/̴̳̠̓̑͌b̴͓̌́͗C̵̭͙̱̅̓̍!̷́̇ͅ!̶̫̽͆}̸̝͕͑͑͜Ä̵̞͚͍́á̷̜͜!̸̢̓̀̓0̶̲͆{̸͕̓̐?̷̥͛/̵͈̠̒̑\̸̨͒́b̴̞̥̅B̷̙̋͐}̵͕̻̟̽[̵̮̲̓͝!̵̞͑͗ͅ2̴͚̈́a̶̯̹̓̃ͅ2̸̯͎̺͆̓2̵̛̀ͅ1̷͚̅́}̵̺̗̓[̴̾͐̓ͅ

Ribbit gave up.

\̴̮̺̩̀̂A̸͇̘̤͑a̷̞̯̒̇{̸͓̥̬̏̅1̷̯͗?̷̦͔͊̐̿/̴̳̠̓̑͌b̴͓̌́͗C̵̭͙̱̅̓̍!̷́̇ͅ!̶̫̽͆}̸̝͕͑͑͜Ä̵̞͚͍́á̷̜͜!̸̢̓̀̓0̶̲͆{̸͕̓̐?̷̥͛/̵͈̠̒̑\̸̨͒́b̴̞̥̅B̷̙̋͐}̵͕̻̟̽[̵̮̲̓͝!̵̞͑͗ͅ2̴͚̈́a̶̯̹̓̃ͅ2̸̯͎̺͆̓2̵̛̀ͅ1̷͚̅́}̵̺̗̓[̴̾͐̓ͅ

Knocking won't do anything now.

\̴̮̺̩̀̂A̸͇̘̤͑a̷̞̯̒̇{̸͓̥̬̏̅1̷̯͗?̷̦͔͊̐̿/̴̳̠̓̑͌b̴͓̌́͗C̵̭͙̱̅̓̍!̷́̇ͅ!̶̫̽͆}̸̝͕͑͑͜Ä̵̞͚͍́á̷̜͜!̸̢̓̀̓0̶̲͆{̸͕̓̐?̷̥͛/̵͈̠̒̑\̸̨͒́b̴̞̥̅B̷̙̋͐}̵͕̻̟̽[̵̮̲̓͝!̵̞͑͗ͅ2̴͚̈́a̶̯̹̓̃ͅ2̸̯͎̺͆̓2̵̛̀ͅ1̷͚̅́}̵̺̗̓[̴̾͐̓ͅ

The others still reach out to him, try to help him. Even though he doesn't deserve it.

He shoves them all away.

\̴̮̺̩̀̂A̸͇̘̤͑a̷̞̯̒̇{̸͓̥̬̏̅1̷̯͗?̷̦͔͊̐̿/̴̳̠̓̑͌b̴͓̌́͗C̵̭͙̱̅̓̍!̷́̇ͅ!̶̫̽͆}̸̝͕͑͑͜Ä̵̞͚͍́á̷̜͜!̸̢̓̀̓0̶̲͆{̸͕̓̐?̷̥͛/̵͈̠̒̑\̸̨͒́b̴̞̥̅B̷̙̋͐}̵͕̻̟̽[̵̮̲̓͝!̵̞͑͗ͅ2̴͚̈́a̶̯̹̓̃ͅ2̸̯͎̺͆̓2̵̛̀ͅ1̷͚̅́}̵̺̗̓[̴̾͐̓ͅ

A new person arrives in the circus. Jax's behavior only worsens.

\̴̮̺̩̀̂A̸͇̘̤͑a̷̞̯̒̇{̸͓̥̬̏̅1̷̯͗?̷̦͔͊̐̿/̴̳̠̓̑͌b̴͓̌́͗C̵̭͙̱̅̓̍!̷́̇ͅ!̶̫̽͆}̸̝͕͑͑͜Ä̵̞͚͍́á̷̜͜!̸̢̓̀̓0̶̲͆{̸͕̓̐?̷̥͛/̵͈̠̒̑\̸̨͒́b̴̞̥̅B̷̙̋͐}̵͕̻̟̽[̵̮̲̓͝!̵̞͑͗ͅ2̴͚̈́a̶̯̹̓̃ͅ2̸̯͎̺͆̓2̵̛̀ͅ1̷͚̅́}̵̺̗̓[̴̾͐̓ͅ

Pomni arrives.

\̴̮̺̩̀̂A̸͇̘̤͑a̷̞̯̒̇{̸͓̥̬̏̅1̷̯͗?̷̦͔͊̐̿/̴̳̠̓̑͌b̴͓̌́͗C̵̭͙̱̅̓̍!̷́̇ͅ!̶̫̽͆}̸̝͕͑͑͜Ä̵̞͚͍́á̷̜͜!̸̢̓̀̓0̶̲͆{̸͕̓̐?̷̥͛/̵͈̠̒̑\̸̨͒́b̴̞̥̅B̷̙̋͐}̵͕̻̟̽[̵̮̲̓͝!̵̞͑͗ͅ2̴͚̈́a̶̯̹̓̃ͅ2̸̯͎̺͆̓2̵̛̀ͅ1̷͚̅́}̵̺̗̓[̴̾͐̓ͅ

Kaufmo gave up.

\̴̮̺̩̀̂A̸͇̘̤͑a̷̞̯̒̇{̸͓̥̬̏̅1̷̯͗?̷̦͔͊̐̿/̴̳̠̓̑͌b̴͓̌́͗C̵̭͙̱̅̓̍!̷́̇ͅ!̶̫̽͆}̸̝͕͑͑͜Ä̵̞͚͍́á̷̜͜!̸̢̓̀̓0̶̲͆{̸͕̓̐?̷̥͛/̵͈̠̒̑\̸̨͒́b̴̞̥̅B̷̙̋͐}̵͕̻̟̽[̵̮̲̓͝!̵̞͑͗ͅ2̴͚̈́a̶̯̹̓̃ͅ2̸̯͎̺͆̓2̵̛̀ͅ1̷͚̅́}̵̺̗̓[̴̾͐̓ͅ

Jax repeats his mother's words back to himself in the mirror.

\̴̮̺̩̀̂A̸͇̘̤͑a̷̞̯̒̇{̸͓̥̬̏̅1̷̯͗?̷̦͔͊̐̿/̴̳̠̓̑͌b̴͓̌́͗C̵̭͙̱̅̓̍!̷́̇ͅ!̶̫̽͆}̸̝͕͑͑͜Ä̵̞͚͍́á̷̜͜!̸̢̓̀̓0̶̲͆{̸͕̓̐?̷̥͛/̵͈̠̒̑\̸̨͒́b̴̞̥̅B̷̙̋͐}̵͕̻̟̽[̵̮̲̓͝!̵̞͑͗ͅ2̴͚̈́a̶̯̹̓̃ͅ2̸̯͎̺͆̓2̵̛̀ͅ1̷͚̅́}̵̺̗̓[̴̾͐̓ͅ

Jax pushes away Pomni.

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Pomni is in a dark expanse. Jax is a distance ahead, standing next to a street lamp.

"I didn't know you could play the piano," she says quietly.

Jax won't face her.

"I only know like two songs..." he replies.

Pomni starts to approach him.

"Why are you here?"

Pomni freezes mid-step.

Jax is sinking in his own mind.

"You know everything now, so why are you here? Just- to rub every mistake I've made in my face?"

Pomni keeps approaching.

"I'm... a terrible person. Is that what you want me to say?"

Jax's mother laying on the ground. His fault.

"I already know I am. ...So why does anybody still care about me?"

Jax is locked away by the mask he created.

"You're not supposed to care."

Jax doesn't know who 2̴̢̛̛̛̘͈̺͎͖͚̠͈̰̻͖̙͋́̑̀̓̊̋̽̇̑͐͐͘͜͠4̸̧̛̣̙̫̱͔̥͓̯͙̝͈͍͇͒̂͛͑͂̒̔̎̑͛̏́̈́͋͗}̴̨̛̮͇̩̈̓͆̃̀̐̏͛̂̌͗̔͝͝͝'s meant to be.

"You're not supposed to miss me! You're not supposed to love me! This isn't how this is supposed to go!"

Pomni laying on the ground. His fault.

"Please. Leave me alone."

Pomni won't.

Jax is sinking in his own mind.

"You're making this so much harder."

Pomni reaches out. She hugs Jax.

"You're making this- so much harder..." Jax sobs.

"You should've just talked to me man..." Pomni sniffles.

"It's too late. I did this to myself. There's no coming back from this." Jax stares into the pink glow of the street lamp.

"But then... talk to me now" Pomni says softly.

Jax finally turns to face her, kneeling and accepting her embrace.

"I hate you... You know that? You always have to go and complicate things," Jax says.

Pomni laughs tearfully. "It's what I do."

Jax sniffs, "...I don't wanna go."

His breathing speeds up, becoming panicked. He's shaking.

"Stay with me," Pomni intructs.

In the circus, the abstracted Jax stumbles backwards, his form becoming unstable again. His foot lands on a stack of flashbangs left over from the guns adventure. They start to clip into each other and the wall violently, and they go gg g    g ogo gg 

                                                                          g

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                              g

                            g

                                    They start to clip into each other and the wall violently, and the ee eee e e

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                                                                                                                 ng    

                                                                                                                             g

                                                                                                                                g

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                                                            dont

                                                                                                go off

            



                                                they y y y y y




                        clip

                                                            through

                                                                                                                                                            the

            



                        




                                                                                    Floor.






Pomni holds Jax tight until he's able to calm down again. When he is, she slowly pulls away, but not letting go of him.

They're in the circus together. Jax's form has smoothed out. The jagged polygons have calmed. The eyes have stopped darting around. Many have closed. Only two remain fully open, and they are fixed on Pomni. Tears fall from them. Tears fall from Pomni's eyes too.

They look at each other. No more words need to be said for now.

The others are watching from the end of the hall. Jax flinches, his form jittering. Pomni holds him tight. The jittering fades. Together they lead him to a tent of their own making to help him stay calm.

Healing will take time. Making up for what he did will take even longer. Forgiveness may never come. And that's okay.

She'll get to be lovely, once she's ready.



Don't give up. Even when it all feels hopeless.

There are people out there that care about you.

You can't undo hurt you caused. But you can work to make up for it.

You are not locked to a single fate. You can choose who you want to be.

Choose for a better future.







Notes:

YES.
I THINK THIS OUTCOME
IS A MUCH
MUCH
LESS HEARTBEAKING CONCLUSION
TO THESE CHARACTERS' FATES.
UNTIL WE MEET
AGAIN.

what the fuck, I didn't even start writing this. I did the prolouge and got up to geta drink and I come back and it's done??? Is that fucking WD Gggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg

LET'S JUST LEAVE IT
AT THAT.
FICTION IS MERELY
ANOTHR FORM OF REALITY.
WHAT IS REAL
AND WHAT IS FALSE
IS UP TO YOU.
YOUR BELIEF
IS POWERFUL.
AND YOUR PRESENCE HERE
DEAR READER
HAS MADE A VERY
VERY
IMPORTANT IMPACT.
THANK YOU.