Chapter Text
Charlie_Spr1: They’re at it again!!!!! :(
Nicholaszzzzz: Oh NO!!!!
Charlie_Spr1: … …
Nicholaszzzzz: You want me to come pick you up?
Charlie_Spr1: No I’ll be ok. We’ve only got about 15 mins left, Jay’s here…
Charlie looks up from his phone and over at the keyboard player. Jay meets Charlie’s gaze and rolls their eyes.
Nicholaszzzzz: Don’t stay if it makes you uncomfortable.
Charlie_Spr1: ngl it is really awkward.
Nicholaszzzzz: Come round here after, if it’s stressed you out. I’ll make you feel better.
Charlie_Spr1: Ty, I was coming round anyway.
Jay begins to play something that sounds classical, possibly Bach, on the keyboard, they like to remind the others that out of the four of them, they are the serious musician, Charlie slips his phone into his back pocket and begins to drum alongside Jay’s instrumental. Aleena and Sahar end their heated discussion and separately move to the furthest sides of the stage, Sahar picks up her guitar and begins to riff along to Jay and Charlie’s improv, Aleena joins in vocalising.
Despite this picture of musical concord, as he walks into the church hall twelve minutes later, Nick thinks he would have picked up on the tension between the band members without Charlie’s forewarning just by the pinched anxious look on Charlie’s face, and the way Sahar’s mouth is set in a grim line. It is clear that neither of them is happy to be there.
On spotting Nick in the doorway, Jay stops playing and gives Nick a friendly wave. The lack of sound from their keyboard player makes the rest of the band look up and stop too.
“Oh, hi Nick,” Aleena calls, “Charlie, your chauffer’s here.”
Flustered, Charlie puts down his drumsticks, stands and walks towards his boyfriend.
“Don’t call him that!” He scolds Aleena, in not entirely mock anger.
Nick pulls Charlie into a quick smooch, hoping to distract Charlie and avoid being ticked off for coming to collect Charlie from band practice, although he wasn’t told specifically not to.
“Are you finished?”
“Yeah, we’d better clear everything away, the girl guides are in here at eight.”
This is a sore subject for Charlie; Aleena, Jay and Sahar can take their instruments home whereas the drum kit belongs to the church hall, and if not securely locked away is at risk from various indignities at the hands of over enthusiastic cub scouts and tots from ‘stay and play’.
With Nick’s welcome assistance (and strong arms) the drum kit is packed away in double quick time, well before the first of the guide leaders arrive giving them nothing to complain about, much to their disappointment. Nick also helps Jay put their keyboard in the back of their car. Aleena and Sahar go their separate ways, and Charlie collapses into the front seat of Nick’s car, finally able to exhale the breath he’d been holding.
“Hey.”
Nick whispers, as he folds himself into the driver’s seat, “Wanna talk about it here, or will it wait until we get home.”
“Let’s go home.” Charlie says, not bothering to clarify that he means River Crescent. It’s a Friday night in the school holidays; his parents won’t expect to see him before Saturday afternoon.
It’s only a ten-minute drive, not really worth Nick getting the car out, as Charlie points out to Nick, saying,
“I didn’t need you to come and pick me up, I could have walked.”
“I know, but I thought you might be… appreciate…” Nick pauses, recently he’s been accused of being overprotective and is in danger of reinforcing that view. “…anyway David was home and getting on my tits, so I grabbed the excuse to get out…”
“I’m happy to have been of service.”
As Nick pulls the car onto the drive of River Crescent, Charlie says anxiously,
“Will David still be there?”
“With a bit of luck he'll be in his room, or he'll have gone to the pub by now.”
Nick parks the car and the two boys get out. Nick lets himself into the house with his key, Charlie following closely behind him. They are at the foot of the stairs when Sarah calls out,
“Is that you Nicky?”
Nick backtracks and follows the sound of his mum’s voice to where she is seated at the kitchen table.
“It’s just us. Has David gone out?”
“Yes, he said something about meeting Karl at the Rugby Club.”
“Okay, I hope he’s not too loud when he gets home, Charlie’s got work in the morning.”
Sarah, doesn’t comment on this, Charlie is something of a fixture of River Crescent weekends. Instead she says,
“I was thinking of getting us a pizza, would you like your usual?”
Charlie nods and Nick agrees for them both, Sarah goes online to order saying once she has finished the pizza will be about twenty-five minutes, the boys thank her and together they return to the staircase and continue their journey to Nick’s room.
This is the last summer before Nick leaves Truham for university and although he has tried to disguise anything that might hint of his imminent departure, his bedroom has begun to demonstrate subtle signs that he will soon be moving on. Charlie who doesn’t miss a trick, has clocked all of these, the new single size duvet and bedding tucked away in the corner along with Nick’s newly purchased copies of Cognitive Psychology: Theory, Process and Methodology and An Introduction to Social Psychology. He hasn’t received his ‘A’ level results as yet, but he has been optimistically working through the book list Leeds sent him with his offer.
Charlie is stoically maintaining his good spirits regarding the shift of their close relationship to a long distance one. If he thinks about it too long or too deeply, he feels anxious but at the same time he recognises that Nick is anxious enough for both of them. Anyhow, at this moment, it is the thought of another parting, that is causing his heart grief.
Nick throws himself onto the bed, pulling Charlie towards him. Charlie is rigid for an instant before melting into Nick’s embrace. Nick feels Charlie relax in his arms before pressing a kiss to his curls, and saying,
“I take it Sahar and Aleena are still not seeing eye to eye.”
Charlie lets out an enormous sigh which sounds suspiciously like a sob at the end. Nick pulls him closer, until Charlie is ready to speak.
“Artistic differences. The truth is they want different things.”
Nick doesn’t ask Charlie to elaborate; he has eyes in his head and has been around Queer Intentions long enough to have idea what the issue is. (In fact he thinks it would make a good case study for his first-year psychology project, but that is rather getting ahead of himself). However this doesn’t stop him sharing his theories with Charlie.
In Nick’s opinion the cause of the conflict in between Aleena and Sahar is that Aleena thinks the others don’t take their band membership seriously enough.
Sahar is dedicated to her music, and while Nick acknowledges that she loves performing with Queer Intentions, in fact you could say it was her baby. However she also has a place at St Andrew’s University to study Arabic and Ancient History starting in September, which means, if all goes according to plan, she will be moving to Scotland very soon. Charlie has already pointed out, that means, Sahar will be further away from Truham even than Nick in Leeds.
For their part, Jay is a seriously talented keyboard player who has been awarded an Organ Scholarship at one of the Oxford colleges, Nick and Charlie have been to hear Jay perform at Truham Town Hall. The music by Saint-Saëns left Charlie in raptures and blew Nick’s mind. Nick thinks Jay is the kind of musician who doesn’t mind what they are playing as long as they are playing. Jazz, rock, pop, Bach, it’s all one. Charlie thinks Nick is spot on and agrees.
As far as his boyfriend is concerned, Nick thinks, Charlie has his A levels and own uni application process to complete, remaining term as Head Boy and the Pride Club to keep him busy, to say nothing of (hopefully) commuting to Leeds every fourth weekend. Whereas, unlike the rest of the group, Aleena has decided against university and hopes to make a future through her music.
Charlie snuggles still closer listening to Nick pondering and Nick decides to risk a question.
“I suppose if Aleena feels she is driving the band’s direction, it gives her purpose. Was it anything in particular this evening? Set them off.”
“Aleena wants us to audition for BGT.”
Nick sits up in shock, dislodging Charlie and nearly sending him flying off the bed. “WHAT?!??”
Charlie recovering his breath, says,
“Sahar won’t do it, she calls it ‘Britain’s Talentless’ and thinks the whole thing is a sell out to commercialism, Jay’s the same, and they think Simon Cowell is a knob.”
“But you’re okay, with that, aren’t you though? You’re not secretly hankering to be a famous drummer.”
Charlie shudders “Hell no! It’s just Queer Intentions has meant a lot to me, and…and..” but Charlie can’t bring himself to finish the sentence.
“I know love, it’s another big change, another ending… and you don’t want to be left behind.”
While saying this Nick has been gradually falling back into his position laying on the bed with the intention of taking Charlie with him, but when he finishes speaking, he finds Charlie resisting.
“It’s not about being left behind, that’s Aleena’s worry. I just don’t want to be known as the Pete Best of the two thousand and twenties.”
“Who?” Nick asks,
“Oh for fuck’s sake, Nick,” Charlie snaps “Just google him, you google everything else.”
Charlie is about to say more, but they hear the doorbell and Henry barking, agitated by the arrival of Dominos.
Nick is a little hurt, he has tried to be patient and understand Charlie’s feeling around the passing of Queer Intentions, even though nothing is definitely settled as yet and the band members have been more or less destined to go their separate ways at the end of this summer since the beginning, just through nothing more extreme than the very act of growing older and moving on. University is a natural progression for all of them, apart from Aleena, and Nick understands her belligerence has its origin in her fear of being left behind. He says as much to Charlie.
Downstairs there is a large Margarita and a Meat Feast to be shared between the three of them, and cool beers. The atmosphere at the table is more relaxed without David, however Nick can't help noticing that Charlie has touched his pizza only to pick off pieces of ham to feed Henry under the table. Sarah and Nick do justice to their helping of the pizzas and if they are aware that Charlie hardly manages a slice and half they don't challenge him on it.
Nick makes them all tea while Charlie helps to clear up. Nick doesn’t have time to google but thinks his Mum might be a good source of information and while Charlie is occupied asks,
“Who was Pete Best?”
Sarah looks thoughtful.
“If you mean who you think I mean, he was the original drummer for the Beatles, before Ringo Starr. Sometimes referred to as ‘the fifth Beatle’ I believe although that is a misnomer as he was in John Lennon’s original band, the one before The Beatles.”
“Oh!”
“What made you ask that Nicky? You could always look him up. I may not have got all the facts right.”
“No, that’s great, I get the idea, now. Thanks.”
Nick picks up two mugs of tea from the worktop by the kettle, hands one to Sarah and goes back to pick up Charlie’s mug, but Charlie has beaten him too it. They bid Sarah goodnight and return to Nick’s bedroom, Settling down again on Nick’s bed.
“You know…” Nick begins,
“Yes?” Charlie asks
“Um… you’re wrong when you said about being remembered as the Pete Best of the Twenty Twenties.”
“And suddenly you’re the expert?”
Nick colours at the sharpness of Charlie’s tone.
“I know nothing lasts forever but I don't think you get it Nick; just how important Queer Intentions has been to me. Drumming used to be something I did for myself, locked away in my bedroom, private therapy for the good of my mental health… Then that first gig we did… the school summer fare… being up on stage with everyone dancing to our music… it gave me such confidence…”
“I’m not surprised, you looked so hot up there, playing…”
“Shut up! It’s a bit like working at Lost Paws was for you. There are so many things I’ve done since that being in Queer Intentions has given me the confidence to do. Standing for Head Boy, starting the Pride Club, working at Rainy Days.”
“But you still are that person, Charlie. You never wanted to be the Pete Best or Ringo Starr of the Twenty Twenties, but you could be the hot television classics Professor of the Twenty Thirties. Perhaps the band will end up a distant memory, but you will still have your memories, and the confidence you’ve built will last you forever.