Work Text:
It's ten AM, and it's already been a long fucking day.
Legend, an unsuspecting observer of his thoughts might ask, what's your problem?
In a word? Customers.
Legend will not say that his customer service is stellar. However, he asks you to please consider that these people do not deserve any of his service, never mind his pleasantness, and if he could quit this job and never worry about money again, he would.
Unfortunately, despite having family with old money, Legend is stuck at this fuckass job while he saves money to go back to school. Legend's preferred mode of contact with those people is none at all, closely followed by active hostility. If Legend gets another text from someone with a Hyrule last name asking him whether he's given up on trying to be a man, he will throw his phone into Lake Hylia.
So Legend sucks it up when a customer leans over the glass divider—which is there for a fucking reason, asshole—and smartly informs him that a flat white does not contain foam. He grinds his teeth and grimaces in the assumption of a smile during the entirety of the video that a young customer, decked to the nines in accessories, shoves in his face.
The video details the construction of a drink called a Blue Bokoblin, which includes several ingredients that Sagebucks does not stock, and a number of others that are not named as they are added in the video. Legend nods attentively, because he knows this customer will shout at him for looking distracted, while he speculates on what in the Goddess' name makes this damned drink blue.
The customer walks away happy. Legend desperately wishes he could sic a blue bokoblin on them.
By the time his lunch break rolls around, Legend is ready to walk into the street and let the Goddesses claim him.
When he checks his phone, he has three unread messages from Ravio, one from Zelda, and over fifty from the Chain's groupchat.
Ravio's texts were sent just before Legend went on his break, because the universe is conspiring against them and his shift at the consignment store starts just as Legend gets his blessed mandated thirty minutes of peace.
Ravio Mercer
gm my love (9:38 AM)
pls pick up cereal and greens from the store after ur shift if u can <3 (10:12 AM)
ok i'm off to work now, love u don't die (11:59 AM)
Ravi I'm genuinely on the verge of ending it all. These people don't know how to fucking read (12:03)
Good luck at work (12:03)
Yeah I can get food. I'll grab more stock too, we can do soup tonight. (12:04)
Legend eyes the notification from his sister for a long time before clicking on it.
Zelda Hyrule
Hi Link, I hope you're well. Are you available to meet for coffee in the next few weeks? (8:24 AM)
Hey, I can check my schedule. (12:05 PM)
Also, can we do anything but coffee? (12:05 PM)
If you use your employee discount, we can leave right after. I'll get us a reso at the plaza for lunch. (12:05 PM)
I'll drink coffee wherever you bring me as long as you don't make me go into work on my day off, Zel. (12:06 PM)
Ah right (12:06 PM)
That's reasonable (12:06 PM)
No need to sound so put out about it. Does next Thursday work? Ravi's got a thing on Friday (12:06 PM)
He needs a "big strong man" to help move Irene's furniture. Apparently he volunteered before he knew what the job was. Typical (12:06 PM)
Sounds like you've got your hands full. Thursday is good. I'll get the place with the terrace you like. (12:06 PM)
Are you okay? (12:07 PM)
What a vague and loaded question. Yes, I'm fine, other than the fact that I'm sitting on a box in the back room of Sagebucks. Did something happen? (12:07 PM)
Mom is being Mom again. (12:07 PM)
Shit, I'm sorry. Need to crash? (12:07 PM)
Maybe. We'll see. (12:08 PM)
She's been blowing up my phone for hours now. You've been brought up like 3x. I wish she would let it the fuck go if she acknowledges that she can't change your mind, but nooo (12:08 PM)
She just needs to be the bigger person by not texting you like Dad does, and I need to agree with her or I'm almost as bad as you (12:08 PM)
Sorry, I don't mean to vent like you're not the one who's been exiled (12:08 PM)
To be fair, it was mostly voluntary. These people suck (12:09 PM)
No offence (12:09 PM)
None taken. I understand your decisions more every day. (12:09 PM)
I'm so glad I didn't tell them about Blue (12:09 PM)
So am I. How is she? (12:09 PM)
Holding up. A lot more people are coming to the Six Maidens right now, with the heat wave and all. She's got a lot going on. (12:10 PM)
I'll refrain from being nosy just for you. Tell me about it tonight or on Thursday. (12:10 PM)
Maybe tonight. I've missed one of Mom's calls just talking to you (12:10 PM)
Sages (12:10 PM)
I know right (12:11 PM)
Zelda stops responding after that. Legend assumes she has been subsumed by the force of nature—for better or for worse—that is their mother. He stares at the end of their text thread for a long time, wondering whether he should have just called her so that she'd have an excuse to avoid their mother for longer.
He knows that wouldn't have done much. Still, he kicks himself for not suggesting it in time.
In an effort to distract himself, he pulls up the Chain's groupchat. The Chain is a friend group that has slowly aggregated over the years because they share the relatively uncommon name Link. Despite the odds, they actually get along really well, probably due in part to the fact that all of their life stories are, individually, insane.
The Chain shows up for Legend as himself more than his blood family does. Zelda's… complicated, and he's so deeply glad that they've remained connected over the years, despite his family whispering nastiness into her ear about him, but she will live under their thumb until she inherits their wealth. The Chain have no such obligation to the people that think he's still a confused little girl, eight years into living as a man.
The nicknames they had to choose after the groupchat was made have stuck in Legend's consciousness like a burr. A friendly burr. A burr made of friendship. Legend used to be bothered by being called anything but Link, but enough time with these people has made responding to Legend practically second nature. Ravio, who hangs out with them sometimes, has begun to slip up and call him Ledge.
Legend scrolls up an arbitrary amount—nowhere near the actual first message sent, he is not going through all that—and begins reading.
The Chain ⛓️⚔️
Wind: my history teacher is telling me that the great flood didn't change the culture of the islands at all. i have the legal right to punch him right (11:58 AM)
Wild: Yeah no for sure go for it (11:59 AM)
Warriors: That seems inadvisable (11:59 AM)
Twilight: no no he's got a point (12:00 PM)
Wind: too late wars ive got three whole depentions now (12:00 PM)
Wind: detentions* (12:01 PM)
Warriors: Literally how (12:01 PM)
Wind: ok first of all its called hyperbole (12:01 PM)
Time: Did you learn about that last period? :) (12:01 PM)
Wind: fuck offfffff (12:01 PM)
Wind: second of all i got 1 deention for standing on my desk (gotta get the high ground) 1 for punching him and 1 for telling the whole class they were next (12:03 PM)
Wind: detention** (12:03 PM)
Four: this is fake right (12:04 PM)
Wind: yea (12:04 PM)
Four: next time you should do it for real (12:04 PM)
The next messages are sent from different accounts through technological wizardry.
Green: definitely do not do that (12:04 PM)
Blue: you're no fun at all (12:05 PM)
Wind: sorry i'm red-green colourblind (12:05 PM)
Wind: i won't let you down blue. (12:05 PM)
Since then, the group chat has gone silent.
Legend: Who wants to deal with the lawsuit I'll incur if another asshole tells me how to do my job (12:14 PM)
Wind: me me me me (12:14 PM)
Legend: I'll be sure to wait 9 years before swinging (12:15 PM)
Wind: thanks man (12:15 PM)
Wind: you know i just have a really tight schedule (12:16 PM)
Rulie: you good ledge? (12:16 PM)
Legend: Yeah probably (12:16 PM)
Legend: Just (12:16 PM)
Legend: Not exactly regretting my life choices but (12:16 PM)
Rulie: facing the conses of your quences (12:17 PM)
Legend: That's about right yeah (12:17 PM)
Legend: I wouldn't go back but I don't like where I am either (12:17 PM)
Legend: Except being gay. Being gay is pretty good. (12:17 PM)
Four: i'm always saying this (12:18 PM)
Wind: yeah you would (12:18 PM)
Four: Do you have some kind of problem? (12:19 PM)
Wind: never #ally (12:20 PM)
Wind: ok theyre killing my ass goodbye forever (12:20 PM)
Legend: Typical performative ally, leaving as soon as you're expected to produce results. (12:20 PM)
Legend: Sky why did you etransfer me 5 bucks (12:21 PM)
Sky: I'm producing results (12:21 PM)
Legend: Damn, Wind's got competition (12:21 PM)
Sky: He will be losing <3 (12:22 PM)
Legend breathes a laugh out of his nose and puts his phone down. His lunch disappears rapidly, and by the time he's done eating it's time to clock in.
The customers in the second wave of the lunch rush are slightly more bearable, likely because they're under too much of a time constraint to cause much trouble for him. The rest of his shift passes in pleasant monotony.
Maybe Legend shouldn't have skipped breakfast. That may have improved the quality of his morning.
Oh well.
By the time he's taking his hair out of its ponytail for the day and folding his apron, Legend is ready to be at home already. He double checks the text Ravio sent about the grocery store and hits it on the way home.
The apartment, revealed as Legend unlocks the door one-handed, is a mess of eclectic furniture and a variety of trinkets. Legend will admit that he's one bad month away from a diagnosis of hoarding disorder. Ravio, however, insists that he just has an eye for good pieces, and the fact that he works at a consignment store with a significant employee discount is an enabling factor. Together, they make a barely liveable space.
They say that love is a verb, and Legend practices it every day by making the active choice to argue with Ravio about bringing home any piece of furniture that catches his eye.
Ravio cleaned the kitchen before leaving for work. Legend dumps the groceries on the counter and mentally swears to thank him profusely when he gets home.
The work of chopping ingredients for soup is methodical and relaxing. Legend puts on a video about the weirdest names of apple species and whiles away a genuinely pleasant hour of dicing every edible vegetable in his fridge.
The door handle turns after the soup has been simmering for thirty minutes. Legend glances up from his book. Ravio steps in, breathes deeply, and his whole body sags in pleased relief. "Bun, I am so goddamn glad that you exist."
Legend bookmarks his page and, exhausted from a day of standing, opens his arms from the couch. Ravio shucks off his coat and boots and practically throws himself across the room into Legend's arms. He curls up at Legend's side, pillowing his head over Legend's heartbeat, and immediately begins fidgeting with the drawstring on Legend's sweatpants.
Legend passes a hand through Ravio's coarse, loose hair. "What's up with the old proprietor today?"
"Not much," Ravio says drowsily, "It was busy today. I didn't get a chance to chat."
Legend hums in understanding and picks his book up again. He makes it through three short chapters before Ravio's stomach grumbles loudly.
"Shall we?"
"Please," Ravio groans, his voice thick with sleep.
Legend ladles the soup into sizeable bowls. Ravio breaks out a bottle of cheap rosé. The meal is simple and hearty, and the wine loosens Legend's tight shoulders. Goddesses, he needed this.
"Thanks for cleaning this morning," Legend says as he begins to clear the dishes.
Ravio, nursing the end of his glass of wine, smiles warmly. "Thank you for making dinner. I would've been found on the news if I had to cook after today."
Legend laughs sardonically. "You're telling me. If I came home to a messy kitchen I would've just ordered out."
Ravio grimaces sympathetically. Legend watches his mind flash to their shared budgeting spreadsheet, which has such little room for take-out that Legend's words read like a casual threat.
Legend scrunches his face in a way that's meant to convey that he would have just made instant noodles. Ravio rolls his eyes—of course he knows Legend would ask before spending that kind of money.
Ten years together has transformed Ravio's facial expressions into a book he's read so many times the pages are falling out.
Ten years together has also turned the knock on the door—a particular five-tap pattern—into a shared language. Ravio is rooting through the cabinet for a third wine glass before Legend's hand has finished closing around the door handle.
Zelda's face is red and splotchy. She's holding a massive leather bag and her long golden hair—the same hue Legend sees in the mirror every morning—is frizzy and tangled. Legend ushers her in, halfway hugging her already, and triple-bolts the door with his other hand.
They stand together for a long moment, holding each other cheek to cheek. Her earrings—stylized brass wire triforces—scrape against his jaw. Metal on stubble creates a strange sound that they both flinch away from in unison.
Ravio holds out a very full glass of wine. Zelda takes it and drinks deeply. When it's halfway empty, she throws herself at Ravio, who wraps her up in his arms. The wine splashes slightly onto the long bunny ears of Ravio's lilac hoodie.
The sight of his heavily ringed fingers combing through Zelda's hair reminds Legend of the before times. When his hair reached his waist and his and Zelda's haircuts were synchronized on a schedule.
Legend grimaces at the thought and leads the two of them to the couch.
Zelda is sour and reticent. They really are so alike sometimes. He and Ravio pile her in blankets and consult her opinion only on light topics. What movie to watch, what snacks to eat, whether she's warm enough. This much, Legend can do.