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The circus was lit by the sunlight that always seemed to be there despite there being a moon. The cast of characters were waiting for Caine to appear to announce the adventure. But one character was different.
Jax stood some distance from the others. They’ve noted he had been acting weird for weeks since the ‘Escape The Circus’ Adventure. He hasn't been showing up for breakfast or dinner. (even though they didn’t need to eat) He hasn’t left his room much except for adventures and avoids them a lot. His fur was messy. (And they didn’t know he even had fur) he’s been more mean to them as of late and always is snapping at them. Even now, he hasn’t stopped pacing.
“Ragatha, do you think Jax is ok?” Pomni asked, still looking at Jax.
“I’m sure bunny boy is fine.” Zooble answered, staring at the rabbit. “Even if he isn’t, he F*£^%@G deserves it for trapping us in here.”
“I… personally like when he isn’t breaking my comedy masks…” piped in Gangle, looking truly happy.
Ragatha sighed, looking at the jester. “Look Pomni, I appreciate you looking out for him, but I personally like this Jax more than the normal Jax. Maybe, it’s a blessing in disguise.”
Pomni wanted to speak to him but Caine suddenly showed up. “Hello! My red rover yellow rovers!” He said, greeting the cast. “Today's adventure is… gonna be a little different. Seeing how amazing the suggestion box was a couple weeks ago, gave me another idea. We'll do another LIGHTNING ROUND, going through all the suggestions in the suggestion box in rapid succession! And if you don't like one, you can all vote to skip it!”
Pomni’s heart sank. If they had an adventure now, she might not be able to speak to Jax. “What? Like, now?” She asked.
“That's right!” He confirmed. “So grab your bones and pop your pansies, 'cause here we go!”
Caine creates a large orange portal above the cast, pulling the cast in.
The cast went on a whirlwind of adventures and votes were quickly used.
Zooble used theirs to stop jax bullying gangle on an anime adventure.
Ragatha skipped an adventure where they’re firefighters because… you know… yarn hair.
Gangle used hers to skip a scissor hand adventure.
Kinger used his to ask for a PBaJ.
Pomni used hers to skip another presidential adventure.
Eventually, they ended up in a beautiful enchanted frog pond. Water clear as glass glistened in the sun. Fireflies danced in the air. The croaking of frogs rang in the cast's ears. Their mission: find the Sehuencas Water Frog in the area. They only took a few steps forward when Jax spoke.
“Alright, I’m calling a vote. Let’s skip this one. It’s the last one anyway.”
“Jax, we haven’t even started yet. Just give it a chance, you might like it.” groaned Ragatha.
“Yea, you put us through hell today, it’s only fitting if we put you through it too!” argued Zooble.
Pomni glanced at jax and saw his pupils wide, his foot tapping against the ground, breath picking up.
“Guys, Jax doesn’t look good. I agree with him. We should skip.” Pomni said, walking to stand next to him only to be shoved away.
The votes came up at the bottom:
Yes: Jax, Pomni.
No: Ragatha, Kinger, Gangle, Zooble.
“Well, that settles things. Let’s go find that frog team!” called Ragatha, who started their trek.
The group began walking with Ragatha reading about the unique plants and critters here. While walking, Pomni remembered something.
“Speaking of frogs, I noticed Jax sometimes staring at this door with a frog. What’s up with that?”
Kinger and Ragatha fell silent at that. “Oh, that’s Ribbit’s door.” began Kinger, a hint of lucidity behind his eyes. “She came to the circus not long before Jax did. They became fast friends after an adventure. Those two and Kaufmo were the perfect trio.”
Ragatha’s face fell at another memory. “We can’t tell when our birthdays happen since… you know? Lack of time here… so we each came up with a day to celebrate. Ribbit stayed in her room to finish Jax’s present on one of his birthdays. He went to get his present and share some cake with her, but… she was gone. He hasn’t really been the same after she was sent to the cellar, or celebrated his birthday. Come to think of it, he started acting like his current self after that.”
Kinger stared at Pommni. “You know Pomni, you kinda look like her. Same cheeks, same cheerful personality, same ability to get through to Jax for a few minutes.”
The six of them kept walking when they saw a hanging plant as if it was made of amethyst. Ragatha checked the manual.
“Looks like…. That's the memorember plant. It brings up someone's worst memories, fears or regrets at a touch. Make sure you duck everyone!”
5 of the group carefully moved under the plant, Gangle and Pomni with less care as they’re shorter. But when they turned to wait for jax… he didn’t duck.
His head rammed into the plant and he was covered in purple glitter. He looked at the group completely silent.
Zooble started to laugh. “Uh oh, bunny boy, you're stuck seeing corn now! HA! I wish I had a recorder!”
Jax didn’t move. He stood frozen for several seconds when he fell to his knees, hands flew to his ears and he started hyperventilating.
“Ribbit… I'm sorry… I didn’t… I didn't mean it. I didn’t mean it, I didn’t mean it, I didn’t mean it!”
“JAX!” Pomni immediately ran over to the rabbit. “Jax! It’s ok! What’s going on? What didn’t you mean?”
Jax wasn’t calming down. He was getting worse. Pomni turned to the group, staring at jax in horror. “He’s having a panic attack! We have to go now!”
“But we already used our one vote each!” reminded Zooble, looking terrified for Jax for once.
“Well find the F*&%#$G frog then!” countered Pomni, looking terrified.
“Oh. you mean this frog?” Kinger asked, holding the exact frog they needed.
Another portal opened up back to the circus and Caine was welcoming them back. “Welcome back my—”
He was cut off by Jax sprinting past him down the hall to the rooms.
“JAX! COME BACK!” yelled Pomni as she ran after him. The others got concerned too and followed behind her.
They ran through the circus but quickly lost Jax round a corner. He had keys everywhere so he could be… anywhere.
The cast searched their rooms, the cafe, the stage and all around but no sign of him.
Pomni saw Ribbit’s door ajar and called the others over.
“Jax?” Pomni called out. “Are you in there? We’re coming in!” she said as she pushed open the door.
The cast peered into the usually beautiful forest themed room, projected stars painting the walls and ceiling. But instead, they gasped.
Jax was in the room yes, but his body was turning black and spikey, and his eyes were changing colours.
Abstractification.
They group stood in silence except for Gangle’s comedy mask cracking down the middle.
Ragatha finally spoke. “Oh! Jax's… been abstracting! That— That's okay.”
“NO IT’S NOT!” sobbed Gangle as she cried into Ragatha’s dress.
Zooble was staring at Jax. Had their comment really caused this? They noticed Pomni about to move towards him and they grabbed her. “Don’t. He’s gone Pomni…”
“We have to help him! Think about it. If going insane makes you abstract, maybe grounding someone reverses it! He’s not fully gone yet!” Pomni ripped free from Zooble’s grip and ran to his side.
Jax turned around and saw the group. “Why are you here? You know everything now, so why are you here? Just to rub every mistake I ever made in my face?! I'm... a terrible person… Is that what you want me to say? I already know I am. So why does anybody still care about me? You're not supposed to care! You're not supposed to miss me, you're not supposed to love me! This isn't how this is supposed to go! Please... leave me alone! You're making this so much harder!
“Jax, I’m here. What happened?” Pomni said, finally reaching him and reaching out but didn’t touch him.
“It’s my fault!” Screamed Jax. “Ribbit was my first friend here. She and I were thick as thieves with Kaufmo. Until… the fight. We were in her room and I trusted her to open up about myself. But after I did, I was terrified she’d tell the others and hurt me and I hated being vulnerable. So I pushed her away. We had a stupid fight on the snowy mountains. I kept chickening out on apologising and when I did, she was… gone! And everyone turned to the DUMB rabbit who argued with her! I never made a friend after that! I thought if I pushed you all away, I wouldn’t hurt you or myself. That’s why I act so much like a jerk. And look at what happened to Kaufmo! I… I…”
“It’s ok Jax, you can tell me.” said Pomni only for Jax to shove her away.
“I WALKED INTO THAT PLANT ON PURPOSE! I WANTED TO ABSTRACT SO I WOULDN’T HURT ANYONE EVER AGAIN! I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHY YOU GUYS CARE! YOU GUYS HATE ME AFTER I PRESSED THAT DUMB RED BUTTON!”
The cast froze at his confession when Ragatha started approaching. “Jax, what happened wasn't all your fault! You can’t blame yourself for–”
“Oh, here we go. Here we go! Because I kept you safe, that means I secretly care about you?!” Jax points to the group by using his gloved-hand. “I'm just a misunderstood little chicken fetus in an egg that needs to be cracked open.” he said sarcastically. He starts to get furious. “Well, I am NOT! I do not care about you, or ANYONE ELSE in this circus in the slightest! End of story!”
He forces a strained smile slowly walking towards the group, looking deranged, as he started singing.
“To me, you're all toys, playthings I must annoy! Once I can see you frown, I know that I can take a bow! Just a Jax Toy, suffer just for my joy! I'd say I'm sorry, but there's nothing more to me…”
Jax fell to his knees, face in his hands, hyperventilating as his abstraction got worse.
Pomni knelt beside him and grabbed his non-abstracted hand tight. “Jax, tell me about Ribbit.”
Jax stared at her, pulling his other hand from his face. “W-what?”
“Yea. When I… lose someone I love, I find talking about them to someone helps me feel better.” Pomni explained, sitting beside him, as the others copied her. “So… tell us about her. I’m pretty sure Gangle and Zooble would like to know about her.”
Jax stared at the cast before he finally talked. “She… she was… amazing. And funny. And sweet. And kind. And… I don’t really know how to describe her. I didn’t have friends when I got here. I actually befriended her after she calmed me down from another panic attack during an ‘EPIC: the musical’ adventure. She’s obsessed with those albums and… I grew to like them too. We used to hide in her room and listen to the songs and she’d always sing ‘Open arms’ whenever I was upset. Kaufmo never fancied them but we had trio things too. The three of us always got hot chocolate every week at the cafe in the top of the tent. She hated the fact we couldn’t swear. We were partners on every team adventure.”
As Jax talked he slowly turned back. His ears, hands, feet, tail, arms, turned back into lilac. But Pomni saw his eyes still flashing colours when he went into a trance and stopped talking.
“Jax? Jax, stay with us! Please!” Pomni gripped his hand harder trying to bring him back when…
Jax shuttered.
“Jax? Can you hear us?” Pomni asked as Jax shook his head, fully snapping out of his trance. He stared at the group with his bright yellow eyes they never thought they wanted to see.
“Huh?” Jax finally said. “W-what happened?...”
“OH THANK GOD!” Pomni yelled as she hugged him. “You could have talked to us, man.”
The other cast followed suit. “You're ok, you're gonna be ok Jax.” said Ragatha, about to cry.
“We’re here for you Jax.” Said Zooble, rubbing his back.
“I’m sorry we didn’t get to you sooner.” Replied Kinger.
Gangle saw Jax’s eyes starting to mist. “Jax, it’s ok if you want to cry. I learned it’s bad to mask your emotions.”
Jax’s eyes flooded as his lip wobbled before he buried his face into the group, sobbing for years of pain and grief he’s masked.
Pomni grabbed his hand and set it to her chest. And hugged him. “Shhhhhh… it’s ok, we’re right here Jax. It wasn’t entirely your fault. Just breathe.”
After several minutes, which felt like hours, Jax finally pulled away, sniffling, and wiped his eyes with the back of his hand. A genuine smile on his face for the first time in ages. “Th-thanks you guys, it… actually felt good to talk to someone. Can you… leave me alone for a bit please? I think I need a nap.”
“Oh, sure!” replied Pomni. As they stood up to leave, she turned to him. “Just… know you can come to us if you need anything.”
“I will. I’m sorry for everything I did to you all. And… Thank you. For… not leaving me.”
The cast began walking back to the main tent when Caine appeared. “Pomni! That's the relatability we've been missing! I have a pleasant surprise for you guys.”
He teleported them to the main tent where they saw another rabbit in a darker shade of lilac. He had a distinct bite out of his right ear and a X scar on his forehead above his right eye. His overalls were a twilight purple with a sewn on pocket and a tear on the left leg of the outfit. He also had a black spiked choker on his neck and black fingerless gloves that made him look like a biker.
“Everyone, I’d like you to meet our newest resident: Rax! I trust you guys can get him situated.” Caine said before teleporting away.
“How do I... take this... headset off?!” Rax said as he struggled to take the headset off, clawing at his face before giving up.
“W-What's going on? I-I-I put on some weird headset, and now I'm... here.” His eyes widened seeing the rest of the cast. “Who are you people? Why can't I take it off? Where am I? Where’s Leroy?! WHAT THE %$!# IS GOING ON?!”
Ragatha slowly approached. “Let’s just calm down Rax. Everything's gonna be ok. Now, who's Leroy?”
Rax turned to face everyone. “Leroy's my little brother. I was at dad’s place when he ran away from our moms place. I got a tip he entered a certain building, put on this headset and… well, here I am!”
“Oh. sorry Rax, we don’t know any Leroy’s. We don’t even know our real names.” apologised Gangle.
Pomni stepped forward. “What’s Leroy like Rax?” she asked.
Rax began to list. “Let’s see: he was obsessed with Ariel briefly as a kid, has trypophobia, is super fast and strong, has an odd obsession with keys, likes spaghetti, likes action/violent/thriller movies, watches gory anime, likes guns, likes the song daisy bell, can play the piano but only two songs, hates corn, egg sacs and pomegranates, hates being embarrassed or looking/acting feminine… Oh! And his favourite animal is the kea!”
The cast stared at Rax. Hates small holes? Likes violence, keys and guns? Hates being feminine? Super fast and strong? That almost sounds like…
“Holy £$%& Rax’s Jax’s brother…” finally said Zooble.
“Jax? You mean you saw him?!” asked a hopeful Rax.
“He actually lives here. And I have a pretty great idea of how to introduce you two.” said Pomni, pulling the others close to explain the plan.
That evening, Jax finally left his room but not alone. In his hand, was a small green bird. A kea. “Guys! Have any of you lost a kea perhaps? I found him outside my door. He’s actually pretty cute.”
“AWW! He’s a pretty bird jax, but not us.” said Gangle, scratching the bird's chin.
Pomni stepped forward. “Jax, we have a surprise for you. Close your eyes for a minute.”
“Why?” asked Jax, his ears perking up.
“Just trust us, please?” asked Ragatha.
Jax relented and shut his eyes. The others beckoned a nervous Rax forward and he gripped his little brother's hands.
“Jax… meet Rax!” said Pomni as he opened his eyes to see his big brother.
Jax stared at the taller rabbit. “Wait… A-Are you…”
Rax chuckled at him. “Hey Leroy.
Jax’s eyes started to mist. “It's... you. Oh, my God.” Jax immediately tackled him sniffling.”I- I... I wish I could remember your name.”
“I know, me too Le– I mean Jax.” said Rax, pulling away. “But now we’re together again, we can go home! Now, where’s the exit?”
The entire cast flinched all Pomni was able to say was “Uh—”
Ragatha tried breaking the situation lightly. “W-Well, don't freak out about it or anything, but, uh, we don't exactly…”
“You can't.” interrupted Jax, looking down at his feet.
“Yeah, he's right. Welcome to your new home. And your new body.” Added Zooble.
“We've been stuck here for years. Old Kinger over there's supposedly been here the longest.” added Jax. “Soo… if none of you own this kea, what should we do?”
“He seems to like you, Jax.” pointed out Kinger. “Maybe you could keep them.”
“Really?” asked Jax before looking at the bird again. “He looks like a Jinx to me. I’ll name you Jinx. How’s that sound?” The bird chirps and nuzzles Jax’s cheek as a response.
That night, everyone was asleep in kinger’s pillow fort. To keep an eye on Jax and Rax. Jax was curled up in the corner in a ball as he slipped into dreamland.
He was back in the circus and saw Ribbit running towards him. “Hey dumb£$%!” Yelled Ribbit.
Jax saw her and ran towards her. “'Sup, moron?!” He responded, opening his arms for a tackle hug…
But he fazed right through her.
He turned back and saw her staring at him. Have her body black and spikey, jerking in all directions and one eye flashing like a disco ball. She started talking. The exact words she said during their final argument.
“Whatever I did, whatever is going on between us, can we just stop this? I miss talking to you! I just want to be... friends again. This can't be what you want!”
Jax tried moving, to talk to her, to grab her and scream he was sorry! But his feet remained stuck and so did his mouth.
Ribbit continued. “Jax, we were friends! We were great friends, and I… I- I'm sorry for prying, but I don't want this one stupid mistake to be the thing that ends all of this!” She finally sighed. “I'm sorry... I'll... leave you alone…”
Jax saw her walking away when his mouth finally opened. “RIBBIT! WAIT! I’M SORRY!”
Jax shot up in bed gasping for breath. It was just a bad dream. The familiar sting of tears appeared behind his eyes as he tried not to cry.
He suddenly felt blankets shifting and saw the others were awake. Pomni grabbed his suspender straps and pulled him down into a hug as he broke down again. “Pom Pom… it was horrible… Ribbit was there… and I couldn’t move… or talk… and she… and I…”
“Shh… it’s ok Jax. It was just a bad dream. It’s ok.”
Jax pulled away from her and stared at the group, tears still streaming down his cheeks. “Why are you guys being so nice? Why are you guys being so nice to me? All I’ve done is cause so much pain and suffering for everyone! You all have every right to hate me and blame me and throw me away like a piece of garbage! You should!”
Jax grabbed Pomni again and cried into her hat. (He would have done the shoulder but he’s double her size.)
Pomni moved him to her shoulder and began rubbing his back while singing.
“To you we’re all toys, All playthings that you destroyed. Once you saw us frown, You finally took your Damn Bow. Just a Jax toy, Suffer just for your joy. We know you're sorry Cuz there's so much more to you…”
Jax’s cries softened to sniffles and he looked at the others again. Zooble crawled forward. “Jax, we don’t exactly forgive or condone your actions, but you’re still one of us. You still matter to us to some degree. When we saw you abstracting earlier, we were… we were so scared we’d lose you.”
Gangle piped up. “Now this doesn’t mean we’re not going to hold you accountable for your pranks, but we’re still here for you.”
“We’ve always been here for you, Jax, and always will be, but you have to let us help you.” Added Ragatha.
Pomni cupped his cheek in her hand. “Jax, I know it isn’t going to be easy but you have to forgive yourself. You can’t blame yourself completely for something you did because you were scared.”
Jax looked at her, “How do you know I can forgive myself?”
Kinger spoke up, resting his hand on Jax’s shoulder. “Jax, in all my years, I’ve seen people do tons of brave things in the real world and here. But you did something even braver than anything. You want to know what it was?”
Jax nodded.
Kinger continued. “You opened up to us. You told us you needed help. You were vulnerable. And you did all that while you were scared. In my opinion, being vulnerable around others and saying you need help despite being scared is the bravest thing someone can do. If you were brave enough to talk about Ribbit to us and open up to us, you can be brave enough to learn to forgive yourself and ask for help.” He wrapped his arms around Jax. “All of you, get over here.”
The others quickly piled into the hug as well. Jax looked at everyone. All these people he tormented for who knows how long, who helped him when he needed it most. And the brother he hadn’t seen in years. Tears filled his eyes but from relief instead of fear. Jax finally fell back asleep as the others watched.
“Soo… anyone wanna tell me what abstraction is? Isn’t that an art form?” Asked Rax, finally finding the right moment to say something.
Ragatha yawned. “Well… Caines probably doing a in house adventure tomorrow since you’re new. So we’ll explain everything tomorrow.”
The others wished everyone good night and went back to their spots, seeing Jax asleep peacefully. They smiled, but not as much as Pomni, relieved to have her friend back.
For the first time since that fight, Jax finally dropped his mask. And it felt amazing.