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Tyler didn’t sleep.
Of course, Josh slept like a baby behind him.
Between the rush of heat from the kiss and the guilt that had settled itself comfortably in his chest, he spent nearly the whole night fighting with himself. He’d ended up moving up to the middle row of seats to avoid being in the back with him.
He could still feel Josh’s lips, and he prayed to find them on his again as soon as he possibly could.
At the same he’d wished it hadn’t happened at all. He’d figured that out some other time, right now he was nearly shaking to get out of the car as they continued down the road for their Atlanta show.
Except, this time it wasn’t the destination of the show he was excited about, he was itching for the first opportunity to get out of the damn van and get Josh alone with him.
Maybe he was desperate, sure, but the kiss had felt like a floodgate that needed to be opened. Now that it was open, he needed to let everything out.
Their interrupted “Make out” (Josh’s words, not his) was hardly enough to feed this bottomless craving Tyler didn’t even know he had up until now.
Josh had been awake for about ten minutes, and despite how badly Tyler wanted to be all over the guy, he hadn’t said a word to him. In fact, he avoided him like the plague.
Josh had whispered a sleepy “good morning” in his ear when he’d finally gotten up. All Tyler said back was “It’s 12:30.”
I mean, okay maybe it was a bit rude considering Josh had been so sweet, but it was noon, not morning. And he needed a hint, with Mark and Michael with them he could not be rubbing his chin into Tyler’s shoulder and whispering things in his ear.
It wasn't like they’d already been doing that the entirety of the tour. But now there’d possibly been a new intent added to the gesture, and he couldn’t risk anyone seeing it.
He could feel Josh’s gaze on him from the opposite end of the van as they drove, the way his eyes kept flicking back over to him. Tyler had been doing the same, but in his humble opinion he was being a lot less obvious about it.
He wondered if Josh had been as plagued by the kiss as he had. He hoped so. Hopefully he didn’t regret anything, as much as Tyler’s guilt and shame tried ruining the moment he prayed Josh hadn’t had the same experience.
The highway had started to feel endless at some point, and the hope of stopping somewhere soon had only been growing since the moment they hit the road again.
They’d passed so many gas station signs, and Tyler had hoped to stop at all of them. He usually wasn’t this bad at confrontation, but knowing what his real intent was made him much more cautious about saying anything.
Finally, Josh leaned over from the back , folding his arms over the back of Tyler’s seat.
“When’s our next stop?” He asked,
Yawning again as if he’d just woken up and not been sitting awake for two hours now.
Mark looked into the rearview mirror. Tyler’s first urge had been to break any possible eye contact. As if simply looking at Mark would reveal everything he’d done.
“I’d say like, 20 minutes? The gas could definitely be filled,”
“I could go for some coffee” Michael added, typing on his phone.
“Alright.. uh, the next gas station is only 5 miles, work for everyone?”
“Yeah that sounds good” Josh responded, leaning back towards the window, unfortunately without the usual shoulder squeeze he’d offer Tyler. He didn’t wanna think hard about that.
“Mhm,” Tyler responded, leaning his head against the window.
By the time Mark pulled their van into a gas station Tyler could’ve sworn 3 hours had passed.
Mark drove out in front of a pump, putting the van in park.
Michael spoke first, his hand already holding his door handle, ready to leave. “Alright, I’m gonna go grab some coffee, do you guys want anything?”
“Get me some too, I’ll fill the van.” Mark replied. Opening the door on his side.
“Thanks but I’m going in too,” Tyler quickly replied. He was not wasting this opportunity.
“What about you Josh?” Michael asked, his body already halfway out the door.
Before Josh could even respond, Tyler’s eyes met his, keeping contact, which seemingly made him a little nervous. “I'm... coming in also.”
Michael clearly didn’t see the hesitation in Josh’s voice, only simply nodding and saying “alright,” before shutting his door.
Tyler opened his own and hopped out, waiting for Josh to wait before making his way inside.
He felt giddy, nervous. Like he was about to take a big test. His heart pounded hard in his chest, and he could feel the heat rush to his cheeks as his eyes had scanned the small building for a restroom.
His eyes quickly met the bathroom sign, where Josh simply followed him into. Luckily, this one had been big enough for 4 stalls, which was rare. If it had been a single stall restroom, they would’ve had to have come up with a really good excuse as to why they’d been in there together. This had already made lying easier.
He checked beneath the stalls, and like the universe was on his side. They were completely empty.
His eyes locked back onto Josh, who was in the mirror mindlessly fixing up his hair. He gave him a confused glance for a moment before what Tyler had been implying this entire time finally set in.
Josh looked towards the door they’d entered and then back at Tyler before quickly making his way into the stall with him.
“Sorry, I know I should’ve ask—“ he began to apologize, but was cut off by the desperate lips that met his own.
He quickly responded, melting into the kiss with equally desperate force. Josh gripped his shirt collar, pushing him against the wall of the stall to keep him in place.
He liked this side of Josh, this desperate and aggressive side he’d never seen outside of his occasional heated drumming sessions.
Tyler’s arms wrapped around the man, his hands finding their way into the back of his neck and his fingers tangling in his curls.
Josh’s kisses were messy, and what had started at his lips had begun to travel down to his jaw, leaving kissing along the bone.
“Josh..” Tyler had hushed out, his breath was uneven and he tried his hardest to keep low in the silence of the echoing room.
The kisses didn’t stop, and he didn’t want them to, he could go like this forever. He wanted Josh's lips engraved onto every inch of his body.
Oh maybe he was letting his thoughts run a little too wild, it hadn’t mattered anyways, now was what mattered and now was being in this stall with Josh and making the most out of the small time they had alone.
Josh kissed his neck, careful to be soft, not daring to bare his teeth against the flesh, Tyler had approached that approach, though he wasn’t sure he’d stop him if he had.
“My boy,” Josh mumbled into his ear, before leaving a small kiss of the cartilage.
Tyler thought he might actually melt, here he was, pressed up against a dirty gas station bathroom stall being passionately kissed by his drummer. This felt like it had to be a dream. He was sinning and yet felt closer to heaven than he ever had.
Josh leaned back again, admiring the face in front of him. His eyes traveled the contours of Tyler’s face.
“You’re so pretty,” he said, his hand finding itself on Tyler’s face, cradling it like he’d been the only person left on earth.
That had to be the explanation for all this. Tyler must’ve been the last person on earth to exist and that’s how Josh ended up with him. That would be an easy explanation.
Tyler couldn’t fathom how he’d been chosen over what had to have been an endless amount of options to choose from.
“You’re,” Tyler choked out his words nervously, not really knowing how to respond appropriately to the compliment. “You’re prettier.” He said, though his voice had clearly broken as he said it.
Josh didn’t comment on his nervousness, he was thankful for that, he simply smiled.
“Not possible,” he argued, leaving a kiss right beside his lips, teasing him.
Tyler was too desperate for any more sweet talk, all it did was make him think. He didn’t wanna think, he wanted to shut his brain off and have this man completely ruin his ability to generate a thought.
He grabbed at his face, pulling his lips back onto his own again, their teeth clashing in an effort to find rhythm once more.
Josh took the lead again, one hand cradling Tyler’s neck as the other held onto his waist, holding him up against the stall.
Tyler opened his mouth up for him, letting him push his tongue past his teeth and tasting what had been saved the night prior. God, he was sure he could die here and be happy.
Josh pushed his body closer against his, leaving nearly no room between the two, his hand going up and down his waist, feeling his body beneath the fabric of his shirt.
Tyler’s hand left his neck, shakily grabbing the wrist of the hand that had been on his waist, and leading it to the bottom of his shirt.
As he’d hoped, Josh had taken the hint and put his hand under the fabric.
Tyler shivered at the touch, letting out a small whine into the man’s mouth. Who proceeded to give him a pleased little groan of pleasure back to him, before taking his time and exploring the skin.
Tyler’s hand rested back on Josh’s neck, pressing his lips closer as if they could eventually collide with one another.
Josh pulled away for a moment to let the two of them catch their breaths. Tyler hadn’t realized, but they were really loud. Their breathing echoed off the bathroom walls, so he couldn’t imagine how loud their kissing had been. Nobody else had been around so it didn’t matter all that much he supposed.
Tyler took this advantage to turn them around, gripping Josh’s shirt in his hands and pressing him desperately against the wall and connecting their lips again.
He heard Josh let out a shocked little giggle. Which he couldn’t lie, kind of offended him. Maybe he was petty.
He disconnected them, attempting to give him an aggressively stern look, “what?” He asked.
Josh put his arms up like he was being interrogated, but his face stayed widely grinning. “You’re rough!”
He didn’t respond, just kissed him again, pushing his tongue past the other man’s teeth and letting his hands explore the shape of the muscles beneath his chest.
The muscles he’d felt pressed against him the last time they had the chance to kiss. The muscles he’d gotten to see many times when Josh had drummed on stage.
The muscles he’d caught a glimpse of every time Josh stepped out of the shower, never fully dry, Tyler’s eyes had always quickly found themselves focused on the man’s abdomen.
At first he’d assumed it was just respect, he’d simply wished he’d had them himself. It wasn’t in any way sinful to acknowledge that a man simply looked good. And Josh, well, he looked really fucking good.
Josh moaned into Tyler’s mouth, louder than he was sure he’d meant too, and he pressed his lips harder onto his, closing any possible gap that sound could make its way out of.
As much as Tyler would love to hear every single sound he could make come out of this man’s body, he couldn’t risk it getting heard outside of the echoing room.
Josh squeezed his waist, pulling him closer. Which made Tyler let out a stupidly embarrassing squeal like a girl who’d just been lifted and spun around.
Josh must’ve thought it was cute though because Tyler could feel the smile against his lips, which despite his embarrassment he mirrored it for a moment before melting back into a drawn out, sloppy mess of lips against one another.
Well, up until the door of the men’s restroom had opened.
“Shit-“ Tyler had quietly panicked. As if he’d been prepared for this, Josh quickly switched their places once more, having Tyler against the wall, and lifting his legs up to wrap around his waist, hiding the extra set of feet beneath the stall.
As footsteps entered into the room, Josh’s hand pressed against Tyler’s mouth, his eyes staying locked in him.
His heart felt like it was going to explode, he’d felt like he’d just robbed a store and gotten caught by another shopper.
Whoever came in only walked up to the sink, and Tyler felt his breathing slow slightly as the sink had turned on. Most likely an employee just taking a quick break.
Once the water turned off, they waited for the footsteps to make their way out of the restroom, and as soon as they heard that, Josh removed his hand, and released Tyler from his arms that had propped him up.
If he was being completely honest, he liked being pushed up against that stall with his legs wrapped around Josh’s waist, he could’ve stayed like that forever.
Josh pat at the back pocket of his jeans, raking out his phone and flipping it on.
“Shit,” he cursed. “We’ve been in here for 15 minutes.” Okay, Tyler would’ve expected maybe 3 at most.
“Oh.” He tried his best to hide his disappointment.
Josh gave him a pitying look, kissing him again on the lips just for good measure. “Soon, promise.” He said, caressing the hair on the side of his head before stepping back to open the stall.
They hadn’t even looked in the mirror, just went straight to the door to exit. They’d already wasted enough time in there, and now one of them had to come up with some good excuse as to why it took 15 minutes to go to the bathroom.
Josh pushed open the door, and luckily neither Michael or Mark had been waiting at it. In fact, they spotted them still in line to pay for their refills.
Tyler and Josh made their way, entering into the line behind them. Up front a woman had finally left the front of the line, stomping her way out, the Cashier looked like he clearly wanted nothing to do with it.
Mark got up and paid, and when he had finally gotten his receipt he’d noticed the other two behind them.
“Where were you guys?” He asked, looking skeptical.
“Bathroom.” Tyler replied, Josh nodded, fixing his hair. Jesus he looked a mess. His face was flushed, he hair out in every which way. His lips were swollen, and Tyler could only imagine what he’d looked like himself. They really should’ve checked the mirror before rushing out of there.
They exited the building, Mark ranting to him and Josh about whatever had been happening in line before they’d gotten there, but Tyler's brain had let it completely go over his head, still dazed from the scene that had occurred in his own little world.
“—so yeah, you really didn’t miss much.” Mark finished off before looking the two of them up and down with a skeptical glance. “What took you two so long..?”
“Oh just, got distracted, talking about the next show.” It was the best excuse Tyler could come up with.
“Okay.. that couldn’t have waited until we got back in the van?”
“Josh had a really cool idea for the next concert and he would’ve forgotten it,” he countered.
“What’s the idea?” Michael asked, taking a sip of his coffee.
“Secret, it’ll be a surprise” Josh responded, good thinking.
Michael just shrugged, opening the van door for the two of them before getting into the passenger seat himself next to Mark.
They crawled into the back seat together again, though Tyler left the seat between them open. He was worried he wouldn’t be able to control himself if he’d gotten too close.
Oh this man was gonna have him drop dead.