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Training had been hard but it was nice to get back some semblance of normalcy after everything. Not that anything would be the same again, but being in that familiar headspace was comforting. Absentmindedly, Megumi wanders back to his room, brushing the sweat from his brow as he contemplates a warm shower to soothe his muscles from the hours of use.
As he enters his room, he unzips his jacket and strips it form his sweat-soaked body, relishing in the cool air that hits his arms. He hooks a hand beneath the hem of his shirt and lifts. The fabric catching beneath his arms as something pulls tight, his elbows stall halfway overhead, and he's brought back to the reality he finds himself in.
He lowers his arms, waiting. As though resetting will miraculously loosen the bands of rigid skin under his arms. He tries again, bringing his arms higher once again. But the outcome is the same, it always is. A fact of his life that he still refuses to accept. So, he continues.
The skin along his ribs stretches taut, the foreign restiance blooms beneath both arms where thick bands of scar tissue disappeared beneath the curve of his shoulder. It felt like a rope being pulled taut beneath his skin, rough and too tight to give anymore. It's restricting, reminding him of the cage that still imprisons him even though the threat is gone.
Ieri's voice plays in his head. "everything's healed well. I'm signing you off for now, but come back if you have any problems." And she's right. His body feels fine, nothing hurts anymore, the skin is healthy and the scars are pale and no longer angry.
But he can no longer fully raise his arms.
Training rarely asks him to reach directly overhead. If it does, he compensates without thinking—turning his body instead, letting his hips do what his shoulders no longer could. Everyone adapts after injuries, no one questioned the small adjustments.
He hasn't mentioned it to Ieri, or anyone for that matter. He couldn't ask for more.
Ieri had pieced his body back together. Yuuji had stayed while he learned how to live in it again. Maki moved freely, with no complaint despite her extensive burns. Everyone had lost important things, at his hand.
Compared to almost dying, it feels insignificant. No one seems to have noticed, not during training or everyday tasks. He wants to keep it that way, he doesn't want to cause anymore trouble than he already had. So, he keeps it to himself and struggles through simple tasks like taking his shirt off, in silence.
So, Megumi struggles through getting his shirt off alone. It's messy, nothing elegant about it. He changes his tactics three or four times, readjusting the angle as if that would magically loosen everything. He hears the sleeve stretch and maybe rip as he fights to get one arm through. It frustrates him to no end, such a seemingly simple task and yet he wrestles with the cotton to pry it from his body. For a moment, he can almost hear Sukuna's laugh, low and rumbling, reverberating in his mind. Even gone, he is still there.
Megumi doesn't inspect the damage once the shirt is free. He tosses it into the laundry basket with the others. This is his normal now. Movements his body remembers but no longer allows, ending in torn seams and silent struggles.
The shower helps loosen his muscles, the warm temporarily loosening the scars and he can reach just a bit further than before, though the relief it gives is short lived. It's a feat in of itself, showering alone. A small semblance of the times before that can no longer be. It's quiet in the dorm building as he padds down the hallway toward the kitchen, but he stops short at the counter, scowling as he notices his coffee mug has been put on the higher shelf. He can't complain too much though, before all this, that was its designated spot. Right next to Yuuji's. He tries, reaching his arm just above shoulder height but the tightness stops him. It feels impossible. Like his skin would tear open if he kept pushing. He wants to keep pushing, to get back to where he was before Shinjuku, before his world had been flipped completely upside down. But the cruel reminders of what Sukuna did to his body, to his soul, made it near impossible.
He reaches anyway, fingertips stretching for the mug's handle.
His arm stops.
The familiar pull blooms at his outstretched arm, thick bands of scar tissue refusing to give any further. It was resistance rather than pain, as though his own skin had become a restraint that dared him to push far enough for it to split.
He adjusts his footing, stands on his tiptoes, tries with the other arm but he can still just brush the mug with his fingertips. It's not enough.
Megumi hadn't heard anyone else enter the kitchen, hadn't realised that someone else was bearing witness to the prison he'd been pretending no longer existed.
"Need some help?" A familiar weight presses into his back as Yuuji reachs over his shoulder, easily plucking both mugs from the shelf. Peppering a kiss to the nape of his neck as he moves to stand by his side.
Megumi's expression softens slightly but the frown remains. He hadn't wanted Yuuji to see him like that, to witness his newfound limitations. He would blame himself even though Megumi never once placed any on him. After all, it had been his decision over a year ago now, to ask for Yuuji's life to be spared. "Thanks," he murmed, watching Yuuji's hands flick between the kettle and the coffee jar.
They move in practiced unison, Megumi passing the sugar to the other without needing to be asked, Yuuji filling both mugs with boiled water. Megumi feels himself relaxing as Yuuji didn't question anything.
Yuuji had already done so much. He had helped him shower when the sound of running water sent him spiraling, stayed close through sleepless nights, steadied him when his legs refused to cooperate during the first weeks of recovery. He had been there through every setback without complaint, as though caring for Megumi was as natural as breathing.
A little tightness in his arms hardly seemed worth mentioning in spite of all that. Megumi is tired, tired of relying on others.
Yuuji's hand lingers on the cupboard door a little longer than necessary, his gaze flicking to Megumi's shoulder. Then, just as quickly, he finishes putting the coffee away.
"I'll see you later?" He asks, handing the mug of black coffee to Megumi with a smile.
Megumi smiles back and nods, "Yeah."
The events of that afternoon were playing on his mind still as the sun began to set. He was hoping nothing would come of it, that Yuuji hadn't really noticed anything was off. The knock at the door drew him from his swirling thoughts though.
"Yeah?" He called, setting his book down.
Yuuji opens the door, holding something behind his back. He looks around the room sheepishly, which is odd because he normally came into Megumi's room around this time. "Can I come in?"
Even more strange, Yuuji knew he had an open invitation to Megumi's room.
He nods slowly, not sure what to expect from the other.
Yuuji sits on the bed, legs crossed as he pulls out a tube of some sort. He fidgets with it as he finds the words.
"I talked to Ieri-san."
Megumi immediately stiffens, "you what?"
"I didn't tell her it was you." Yuuji continued, "I just asked her what helps if scars are making it hard to move." He offers a small smile as a peace offering.
"It's not a big deal," Megumi defends.
Before Yuuji can respond, he adds "It doesn't even hurt anymore."
Yuuji sits with that for a moment, "then why couldn't you reach your mug?" He asks softly.
With a small frown Megumi reaches out toward the tube but Yuuji pulls it back slightly. "Let me do it." He asks, "I've got warmer hands." He chuckles.
Megumi can't argue with that, it's one of the many things he loves about Yuuji. "Fine," he conceeds, "but don't get it everywhere please." He smiles back softly.
Yuuji crawls toward him on the bed, sitting directly in front of him. He lay the tube on the bed for a moment while he looked back to Megumi, planting a kiss to his forehead. "Shirt off," he smiles against Megumi's skin.
"You do it," Megumi concedes, "I don't want to rip another shirt." He admits.
He watches Yuuji's eyebrows knit together as he pieces things together before he nods. He takes care to be gentle, pulling the shirt up and over his head. Yuuji sits back and admires the boy in front of him, the boy who had been through so much but continues anyway. He drags his eyes across the scars peeking from under his arms and wrapping around to his ribs. The scar in the centre of his chest. The skin pulls just as he breaths, Yuuji can see the scar tissue pulling everything taut, restricting every movement.
"How long has it been like this?" He asks softly, rubbing the tube between his hands.
Megumi looks away for a moment then drags his eyes back, a frown pulls at his face. "A couple of months."
Yuuji's hands still. "Months?"
He shrugs though he immediately regrets it as the skin pulls taut. "I thought it would go away or get easier…" He trails off.
"Why didn't you tell me?" Yuuji asks, not a drop of accusation to his tone.
"You've already done so much."
"Taking care of you isn't something I keep score of." Yuuji says quietly but sincerely. He reaches out instinctively to trace the patterns etched into his skin but retracts as he sees the flinch Megumi does in response.
Yuuji nods slowly, "can I touch them?"
"Mhm." Megumi just hums softly, he supposes he has nothing to hide anymore. This is just how his body is now, and he needs to come to terms with it.
With a tentative hand, Yuuji reaches out and traces the darker, rough patches of skin by his arms. He can feel Megumi's skin stretching around it, trying to accommodate the restraint that still clings to him. He withdraws his hand and applies some scar cream to his hands, he lets it warm a little before he made contact with Megumi's skin again. "Let me know if it hurts." He says.
"It doesn't hurt much anymore." Megumi says offhandedly.
Yuuji's lets his whole hand rest lightly over the scar under his arm, letting Megumi get used to the contact and the sensation of the cream.
"This alright?" Yuuji asks, pressing a little harder.
"It's fine."
He begins with small circles and light pressure, his thumb tracing along the edge rather than directly on it. Yuuji follows the length of it, mapping it. His fingertips travelling carefully along the darkened lines.
As the cream absorbs, Yuuji rests Megumi's elbow on his knee, taking the weight of it so the other can relax completely. Yuuji braces the raised and tight skin with one hand and with the other he gently manipulates the rest.
Nothing dramatic, just enough to encourage movement and loosen the tight bindings.
Megumi hisses, his shoulders instinctively tensing with the manipulation and tightening sensation.
Yuuji stops immediately, "too much?"
"…No." Megumi shakes his head, "keep going."
Yuuji complies, methodically stretching the skin within and around the scars, applying slightly more pressure with each pass.
"You're too tense, lean into me more." Yuuji instructs.
Megumi frowns. His jaw is clenched, shoulders rigid and breathing shallow.
"It'll make it easier." Yuuji suggests, a smile on his face.
Giving in, Megumi leans the entire weight of his arms on Yuuji. He's right, the skin moves easier and slides better. Eventually the burning sensation gave way to warmth, his jaw unclenches, his shoulders drop, he hadn't realised how much he was guarding the area until the rope-like tightness slowly began to relax.
"Does this side feel different?" Yuuji asks as he finishes with one arm.
Megumi slowly compares, raising one, then the other.
"…A little."
Yuuji nods, repeating the process on the other side.
"Feel ok?" Yuuji asks, finishing off the massage .
Megumi rolls his shoulders, his arms lifting another inch than usual before the stricture caught up. It feels more comfortable, less caged by his own skin.
"Feels great." He smiles, leaning over and planting a kiss under Yuuji's eye, where the remnants of Sukuna lay on his face.
Yuuji beams in response, "glad it helped."
Megumi shuffles back on the bed, making room for Yuuji to slot in next to him. Legs entwining, he picks up his forgotten book as Yuuji leans his head against his chest, tracing the outline of the scar in the centre of his chest.
They sit in quiet, comfortable silence for a while. Just apprieciating each others company.
"Can you do it again tomorrow night?" Megumi asks.
"Anything for you."