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Sun stood in the bathroom, staring at himself in the mirror.
It was strange, being down on Earth's surface in these forms. They were so flimsy, gangly limbs clumsily flailing around–and walking was an even harder challenge. It was just falling and letting Earth's gravity drag you down, and you just had to hope that you caught yourself in time.
It was annoying. And frustrating. And really, really hard for some reason.
The star huffed, leaning further over the sink with a scowl on his face. He rubbed his eyes, but the stupid eyebags sinking into his skin wouldn't go away. Ugh! He's a star! His body should listen to him when he demands it to!
But no matter how hard he glared at himself in the mirror, the exhaustion stayed stuck to his eyes, a paleness to his face that probably wasn't normal. But hey, what did he know?
Nothing apparently, because Earth's surface has a million rules and a bajillion things that he should know, but he doesn't. Because he's a star! He's spent his entire life in space, he couldn't magically know everything there was to know about surviving down here.
Sun planted his hands on the sink counter, squinting against the harsh white light of the bathroom. A headache was already starting to form (again, why were these bodies so weak?! They fell apart at every stars-damned moment!), an annoying feeling of tiredness settling over his mind.
He'd gotten…some sleep last night, and he didn't even do anything today! So he had no idea why he was so tired. It frustrated the star to no end…Earth said that this was going to be fun but the countless rules and mysterious dangers just set the star on edge and took away any of the supposed "fun."
You know what would be fun? His body not aching all the time. That would be really nice, and would at least make Sun less tired (...probably), but nope! Not possible! Earth can't fix these useless bodies because apparently, "That's not how it works, Sun. It's not that easy, Sun. Maybe if you took care of yourself more, you would feel better, Sun."
It didn't matter if the star tried everything, he just needed to do better.
Doing better would solve all the issues apparently. But how does he do better if he doesn't even know how?! No one else seems to be having these problems–or if they are, they're hiding it really well (which was another problem because if one of his planets were in pain, why were they hiding it? That's not healthy. Only Sun is allowed to do not-healthy things because he's their star and stars are allowed to do that), so there's definitely something wrong with Sun.
No surprise there…
Sun rubbed his eyes with a sigh, tearing his gaze away from the bathroom mirror. Staring at himself only made this body look even more…wrong. Wrong eyes, wrong hair, wrong skin, wrong everything.
Could he ever do something right?
Frustration boiled in his core–heart. Not core. Because being Earthlings means they have hearts now. Fleshy bodies with frail bones and slimy organs just floating around in his body.
The star shuddered, grimacing in disgust. How did the humans deal with knowing what's inside their bodies all the time?! It was horrifying! At least in space he just had elements and his core, but in these forms he could feel every possible thing going on in his body.
The slimy organs are just there. Separated by a thin layer of a whole different organ stretched across his entire body. So thin he could see his blood and feel some of his organs and bones through it!
Sun wrapped his arms around himself, suddenly feeling very vulnerable. These bodies don't have enough protection. Something could easily come along and rip out all his organs! What's stopping them?! Sun doesn't have his heat or his flames or any of his solar flares down here to fight back.
He's useless. He can't defend himself or his planets.
…oh stars, what if the rogues find them? What if they go back on the agreement Sun and Simp made and decided to invade? Would the star know if he was down here and it happened, or would the rogue planet army just march right it and kill him and take Earth.
He's doomed. If that happens he's doomed.
His heart pounded loudly in his chest, making the weak body struggle to take in breaths. His chest tightened, hands clenching into fists…stars above. There's nothing stopping them. Sun is down here and weak and vulnerable and they can strike at any moment and steal his life and love and light away.
Fear struck through his mind like a bolt of lightning–and he couldn't ignore it. He couldn't shove it down, couldn't push it away, the fragile human body taking the fear and just multiplying it. They'd crushed him easily when he was fighting back. How easy would it be to kill him now?
The mighty star shook, forcing a shaky breath in, and out, leaning against the counter to gather his bearings. Get it together, Sol. It's fine. Stop worrying about it. Worrying doesn't help and just makes you more weak.
You can't be weak, right? You're a star. You have hundreds of celestials counting on you to protect them. His teeth grinded together painfully, intense, fiery gaze rising back to the mirror.
"Keep it together," he hissed, glaring at his reflection. His eyes burned, a shine to them the star very much did not consent to seeing glinting off the light. An ugly, scared feeling bubbled up, but the star just shook his head, blonde curls falling into his eyes. You can't break down now. After billions of years you can't.
The silence of the house seemed to press down on the star, suffocating like a thick blanket smothering everything. His heart skipped a beat again, silly paranoia creeping in on the edges of his mind. He knew there was nothing wrong, he knew that if something was happening he would be the first one to know, and yet…
It was too quiet. Eerily quiet. Quiet in ways a house filled to the brim with people shouldn't be.
The star's senses expanded, his shaky breaths stilling as his hearing (through the quiet ringing in his ears) narrowed in on the sounds of the house. The buzz of the machines scattered throughout the house caught his attention, but he didn't care about those. A clock ticking, the whirr of someone's ac–but where is everyone?!
If Sun was a little more rational, he would've realized that most of the celestials are quiet when they sleep, so it would make sense that the house would, also, be quiet.
But he wasn't.
So the silence just pulled the star further into the panic gripping his mind, ice-cold fear lashing through his heart. Something happened, his thoughts screamed, and Sun couldn't help but listen to them, something happened and you're going to lose them all over again. What are you doing?! Why aren't you doing anything!
Failure. Failure! Do something! They're d y i n g–
"Uhh, hello? Anybody in here?"
Sun gasped, immediately stifling the sharp, shaky inhale with a wet cough. Panic tainted his thoughts, swirling them faster and faster and stealing away his breaths. The star grimaced, realization suddenly flashing through his chaotic mind. Oh…oh wait! It's someone! They're alive!
…oh god he can't be seen like this.
He pushed himself off the sink, splashing water on his flushed face and roughly rubbing away the blurriness of his vision. Get it together. Get it together. Desperation, panic, fear thrummed in his chest, ears ringing as he swallowed past the lump in his throat. Snap out of it Sol.
He sucked in a shaking breath, voice straining as he tried to put on his 'everything is fine' voice, "B–b-busy! Go away ple–please."
"But I'm thirsty!" The voice–he knew who it was, he knew them, he could picture their face and their childish grin, their name was on the tip of his tongue but lost to the rest of the chaos–whined, "And the water's icky everywhere else."
"Uhm…" The star swung his gaze back to the mirror, his face still drawn in a pained expression. Sun willed it to change–to make his flushed cheeks turn back to normal, the teary shine in his eyes to disappear, the shake in every breath to die down–but he couldn't.
He's not a star down here. He can't hide behind his flames. He's too weak.
Nope, nope, nope. Not letting anyone see him like this. No way, no how.
Annoyingly, the person behind the door did not share the same sentiment. Three quick raps on the door snapped Sun's attention to it, the stubborn voice not going away, "I heard you wash your hands! That means you're done and I can come in!"
No, no, no, no WAIT–
Before Sun could move, the handle twisted and the door swung wide open, revealing the frail star to the vicious outside world.
He stumbled backwards, the terror and panic and everything slamming back into him full force, desperate pleads slipping past his lips before he could reign them in. Please, please, please no–his back hit the wall, trapping the star as the darkness of the night creeped in, eyes wide as he watched, helpless to stop the approaching evil.
"Pleasedon'thurtme!" Sun whimpered, flinching away from the door and clenching his eyes shut, gritting his teeth, bracing for the attack with his arms raised to cover his head. Breaths choked, dying in his throat in a pathetic-sounding whine. Oh stars. No, was this it? Was this where he dies? All alone, suffocating in the darkness that has haunted him his entire life?
"–not gonna hurt you!" A voice exclaimed, trickling in through the rampant terror infecting his mind. W-what? Are you sure? What if it's a trick? What if they're trying to get his guard down to attack him? The star shook, legs barely holding up his weight as he pressed himself further against the wall. It's a lie. It's all a lie. Don't trust them. Don't trust anyone!
"You don't have to hide from me," the voice said, softening in a way that just upset the star further. Pity. They're pitying him now. He doesn't need anyone's pity! Just kill him already if that's what you're here to do. Don't torture him physiologically as well. He's already been through enough of that.
Touch suddenly brushed against his leg–gah! No! Mercy please!
…but the pain he'd expected didn't come.
Instead, the touch moved slowly, wrapping around his legs (...are they trying to trap him? If so, they're doing a horrible job at it, he could easily step out of the hold) and squeezing ever so gently. For some reason, either due to the floppy human brains or the star's frazzled mental state, feeling touch–loving touch, not a punch, not a kick, not gravity wrapping around him, but actual real-life touch from another being, stalled his mind.
Every sense narrowed in on the arms wrapping themselves around his pajama pants, skin buzzing in a wonderful, satisfying feeling that pushed back the fear ravaging his mind. Instinctively, he leaned into it, a happy feeling fluttering in his mind and lifting the crushing weights from his heart.
This was…weird to say the least. He'd been able to touch his planets a few times before (mostly billions of years ago, when they were small enough to fit in his palm and he didn't burn as bright), but something felt…different this time. More.
Sun sucked in a breath, and then another, trembling hands reaching down to the mysterious, tiny being who dared approach the mighty star. He ruffled their hair, and they giggled. A carefree, bright, bubbling laugh that stole Sun's breath away. How could someone be that happy? How could he gain such sweet, sweet innocence?
Sun peeled open his eyes, wincing yet again at the harsh bathroom lights attacking his brain (a whole new headache forming after that strange experience), glancing down at the little person who still clung to his legs.
Proteus was the one who beamed back at the star, his face half-smushed into Sun's pjs as Sun just stared, his cheeks heating up in embarrasment. Wow Sol. Look at that. You had to be saved by a child–
"You feeling better Mr. Sun?" Proteus asked, the bright, innocent smile never wavering as he tilted his head up at the star. Oh what Sun would give to be that young and naive again, ignorant to the horrors that were soon to come to fruition. The little moon squeezed Sun again, smooshing his face (that probably had a lot of germs and boogers on it…ew) into his legs with another giggle, "You looked like you needed a hug!"
Sun bit back a sob, the tiny, miniscule action finding a way to worm its way into his core and warm him up from the inside out. Something–something deep inside him that had broken a long time ago, continuing to be shattered with every new, terrible thing that happened to him–fluttered back to life, cracks healing over as the star just stood there, dumbfounded and far more emotional than he'd ever supposed to be.
Wow…
Sun nodded before he realized what he was doing, movements slow and shaky as he raised a hand to ruffle Proteus' wild hair. "Yes…" he murmured, the tension leaking from his body as finally, finally the star was able to relax, "Yes I am feeling much better."
Awe crossed through the moons' expression, Proteus instantly breaking into a cheer that was far too loud for this late (early?), "Yay!!!" He let go of Sun (the star ignoring the sadness that immediately replaced it, mind and body mourning the tantilizing feeling of touch) dancing around the bathroom with horrible dance moves that were more akin to a chicken flapping it's wings.
But Proteus was happy…so Sun did his job.
He didn't fail.
Sun smiled–actually smiled, the warmth in his chest spreading to the rest of his body with fluffy, buzzing delight. Exhaustion still clung to his thoughts, but the worst of the…everything was over, freeing the star from panic's vicious grasp. And thank the stars for that…
Sun darted forward, swooping Proteus into his arms, the little moon squealing in giddy delight, "Come on, off to bed now." He ignored the complaining whine from Proteus, shuffling out of the bathroom and heading down towards the moons' rooms to bring Proteus back to his room, taking a little longer than he needed to just soak in the feeling of another body's touch pressing against him.
Stars above. It truly did feel magificent.