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Incident number 1: Cliff Marlow
It was the first real practice since Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov had joined the Centaurs and things were looking up. They brought great energy to the team, as well as great talent.
The team was winding down in the locker room, some already in the showers. Cliff stripped off his sweat slicked gear and reached to grab his towel. He walked through the doorframe. Nothing prepared him for what he saw.
What the hell?
It’s an unspoken rule that if someone is showering you should pick a different shower at least 2 places down. Never directly next to someone. No one ever picks a shower right next to another person. Definitely an invasion of personal space. And privacy.
But right now Cliff is staring at Shane and Ilya showering right next to each other. Holding a full conversation while maintaining eye contact.
Cliff watched Shane laugh at something Ilya said, literally as he was washing his ass.
Now Cliff is just standing there staring like a creep. Bood came up behind him and began to ask, “Why are yo-“ Cliff guessed he cut himself off after seeing them. Practically showering together. At this point they should just start washing each other’s bodies.
“Are you seeing what I’m seeing Bood?” Cliff questioned.
“Yes. Yes I am.” Bood mumbled then raised his eyebrows.
Yeah probably best not to dwell on it.
Incident number 2: Wyatt Hayes
Media day was always boring. But Harris always tried his best to make it more enjoyable, Wyatt can see how much he loves his job. Everyone had gotten their photos taken already…except the newest Centaurs. They were missing.
Wyatt, Jim, and Connors had been tasked with finding them. Jim had checked the bathrooms and the locker room already. While Wyatt and Connors roamed the hallways. The three eventually met back up outside the players lounge.
“Have you guys checked in here yet?” Jim asked as he pointing to the lounge doors.
Wyatt shook his head, “Nope.”
Connors then pushed the double doors open.
The players lounge has a mini kitchen, 2 couches, and a few tables with chairs placed around them.
Well there they are.
Wyatt saw Shane and Ilya sleeping peacefully, cuddling on the small couch together. Shane’s hand sat comfortably in Ilya’s curly hair.
He is definitely bitter that they were in here snoozing while the rest of the team had to suffer through media day. But Wyatt was more surprised that the two men were practically bundled up like a couple.
“What the- how is this fair?” Connor’s whisper yelled.
“Rozanov is going to suffocate Hollander holy shit he’s six-three dude,” Jim said while quietly walking over to the couch they lay atop.
“Oh my god, just wake them up!” Wyatt tried to whisper, but he was couldn’t do it as a kid and he still can’t whisper now.
“Ok damn Hazy, shut your loud mouth up.” Jim joked.
Jim then proceeded to poke at Ilya’s side, which only made him aggressively sigh and nuzzle his face into Shane’s cheek.
“Bro.” Connors mumbled while dragging a hand down his face.
Ok fine I’ll do it myself.
Wyatt reached for the nearest pillow and threw it at Ilya and Shane’s heads. Ilya sputtered out a string of Russian words that sounded sour. Shane just rubbed at his eyes and yawned.
“What is- wait, oh!” Shane pulled himself up from under Ilya and flushed a concerning shade of red.
Jim turned on his captains voice and said, “We have been looking for you guys so you can get your pictures taken!” He added, “Come on, get up.”
Jim could captain all he wanted to, but Wyatt was more concerned with the fact that the Terrible Twos are awfully comfortable with each other.
It made sense though. Ilya is just European, and Shane is just comfortable with his sexuality. Right.
What was that one saying?
Gay or European? More like gay and European Wyatt thought to himself.
Incident number 3: Zane Boodram
Team dinner is Zane’s favorite. He’s a big foodie so it was always fun going to all different types of restaurants on roadies.
Currently the Centaurs were in Tampa after one hell of a game, that they won. To celebrate everyone agreed to meet at this nice seafood spot close to the hotel.
Everyone had gotten their food and were casually making conversation. Zane ended up at the end of the table with Shane, Ilya, Cliff, Pike, Dillon, and Barrett.
Normally Zane would’ve been fully immersed in his meal. But he was is to busy watching Shane and Ilya share their food. But not just food. He had seen Shane drink out of Ilya’s straw 4 times, Ilya hand feed Shane 2 bites of his Cajun ship pasta with his own fork, and Ilya pick off of Shane’s plate using Shane’s utensils.
I would never share germs like that, what the hell?
Who in their right mind uses someone else’s fork, to steal their food? The utter disrespect. What happened to using your own fork. Multiple times they would switch forks and knifes. Passing around germs like a game of hot potato. But they seemed really content doing so. In fact, Shane smiled with bright eyes while Ilya started devouring his food. Zane then saw Shane scoot his plate closer so Ilya could have easier access.
Huh, cute.
Whatever. He was too hungry to think about what this was. Maybe he’ll ask Troy if he thought their behavior was rather homosexual.
Or they could just be best buds. Yeah, sure.
Incident number 4: Jim Clyde
The airport was always cold as hell. Jim pulled his jacket taut around his body and adjusted his hood. The team was preparing to hop on an early flight to Dallas. Coach told everyone that there was at least 30 more minutes until they could board.
A few sighs and murmurs of tiredness rang about the seating area. They’re all standing up in this makeshift line but some began sitting down in the stiff chairs.
Jim sat down in the nearest seat and plugged his phone up in the slow charging socket. He peered over his phone to see Ilya sat stoically with his eyes closed in the seat in front of him. Because Shane was never too far away from where Ilya was, like never, he appeared in Jim’s field of vision.
“I hate these seats, they just make my back hurt.” Shane complained with a slight pout. Ilya then patted his leg a few times, “Sit.”
Is he serious right now?
Without a word, Shane hummed contently and plopped down right on Ilya’s thighs. He then pulled out his phone and started scrolling absentmindedly. Jim studied this interaction carefully. Before he could dive deeper in his thoughts, Shane interrupted him.
“Jim, do you know what hotel we’re staying at?” Shane asked normally. Like he wasn’t a grown ass 21 year old sitting in his best friend’s lap.
“Um, Marriott- I think.” He sputtered.
Get it together Jim.
During this whole short conversation, Ilya didn’t move or shift once. Didn’t even open his eyes. It was almost like it was a normal occurrence for him. Shane sits in my lap, yes normal. Because that is exactly what 2 best friends do that don’t have a single queer bone in their bodies.
Jim would figure them out sooner or later.
Incident number 5: Brandon Wiebe
Brandon was in his office sifting through emergency contact information. The Centaurs season was about to begin officially, so he better get the boring work done first. Coaching had its downsides too.
Ha had worked through almost all the players in 30 minutes. It wasn’t that checking emergency contacts was hard, just time consuming. The paper was coarse under his finger pads as he flipped to a new document.
Ah, Hollander’s contacts.
Brandon assumed it would be someone like his mom or dad. Maybe even one of his old teammates. Shane was still pretty close with JJ, or so he’s heard.
His eyes widened as scanned down the page. Why in the hell was Ilya Rozanov written in fine print under emergency contact. When did they had time to become so close?
Even he was shocked hearing about Ilyas and Shane’s seemingly random move to Ottawa. Brandon was even more shocked in the first week of preseason trainings seeing how buddy-buddy they were. Doing things like hugging after every goal or well executed play.
Quickly Brandon turned the next page and was met with Ilya Rozanov’s document. Yup, his emergency contact was Shane and his backup was Shane’s mom.
Fun.
He didn’t know their friendship was already at the ‘Yeah, let’s be each other’s emergency contacts!’ stage.
With the way those two act, you would think they’re in the same emergency for goodness sake’s.
But this was an issue because players can’t be each other’s emergency contacts if they are on the same team. This was exactly why management made him check over the paperwork. To make sure no one made their dog their emergency contact, or maybe even their 80 year old grandma.
So he had some calls to make. He picked up his phone and searched for “Hollander” in his contacts. Shane was always more likely to answer. He hit FaceTime, it rang 4 times before Shane picked up.
Brandon didn’t even bother thinking about calling Ilya, he already knew he and Shane were together anyway.
As expected, Ilya and Shane’s faces filled his screen. They were both in the car together. Brandon could tell by the background. Shane’s lips were wet and pink while Ilya’s pupils were blown wide.
Ok weird. But not the point.
“Yes Coach?” Shane said in a worried tone. At the same time he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.
“Great, I’m glad you both are here,” he cleared his throat trying to dissipate the awkward vibe going on “We have matters to discuss boys.”
Ilya and Shane both looked at each other and shifted uncomfortably in their seats.
“You guys can’t be each other’s emergency contacts, if anything you’ll be in the same emergency.” He said breaking the news to them.
“Oh.” Was all Shane could get out before he and Ilya began laughing up a storm.
“No, guys this is serious.” He tried to reason. That didn’t seem to phase them at all.
“Sorry we thought you were about to say something else!” Shane said through a few giggles. Ilya then threw his hand over his mouth “Can you imagine he figured us out before the season started!” Ilya exclaimed with literal tears coming out the corner of his eyes.
“What are you guys even saying?” He regretted even calling at this point. Maybe he should have just let them be each other’s emergency contacts.
“Whatever, just change them to literally anyone else by Saturday please.”
“Yes Mr. Wiebe sir!”
Those two were are handful.
Incident number 6: Hayden Pike
Hayden was sat next to Shane on the bus. The seats had been assigned, otherwise Shane and Ilya would’ve been sitting together.
The bus had barely started moving before Shane took out his phone, placed his AirPods in his ears, and started FaceTiming someone.
Seriously who FaceTimes someone in a public place?
Hayden slightly leaned over to glance at Shane’s screen, and well this wasn’t surprising.
He was calling Ilya who was seated 4 rows ahead of them. They weren’t even talking. Just sitting on the phone together, soaking in each other’s presence from afar.
But it was still outrageous. Can’t they just spend a few hours apart? Hayden tapped Shane’s shoulder to get his attention.
He turned to face Hayden and took his left AirPod out “What?” Shane said in a clipped and annoyed tone. Like Hayden was the problem for interrupting their precious video call.
“Are you really calling him right now?”
Shane scoffed and looked at him like he was crazy, “Yeah, so?”
“Rozy is literally right there.”
“Yeah but I can’t see him really.”
“Just a few rows up”
“I want to see him”
Hayden sighed in defeat. “Alright buddy.”
Ilya placed his middle finger directly in front of the camera and made sure Hayden could see.
He mumbled under his breath and sunk further into his seat, “you two are just happy to be a mess…”
Hayden then pulled out his phone and texted Cliff, who was sitting next to Ilya.
-*•*-
Me: U see this bruh
Cliff: Bro they are a hot mess ✌️
Me: kinda like unemployed discord moderator type of behavior
Cliff: Hollzy is the mod and Rozy is the e-kitten
Me: definitely 😂✌️
Cliff: Ilya is bouta start purring and shi while shane calls him a good boy