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Dan watched as Phil wobbled towards the camera to switch it off, his legs still numb from sitting down for so long. Phil let out a sigh as he began to carefully undo their tripod and pack everything up. Dan dusted crumbs off of his pants. Usually the idea of their floor being littered with particles of food would annoy him, but he found that he was too high on cloud nine right now to be angry. Even though the video had ended, he still felt remnants of the warmth in his chest that he felt during the recording. It was so strange. The last time he and Phil had recorded a pizza mukbang, he'd been exhausted, so out of it that he couldn't find any reason to continue doing YouTube. He had encouraged so many people to live their truths and to be proud of who they were, yet there he was, deeply closeted and terrified to come out. It felt like he was an impostor. Dan remembered the fear both he and Phil had felt during that time, the uncertainty of their future like a shadow looming over them. Yet now here they both were, open about their relationship, unafraid of who they were, and about to tour across the world.
He leaned back into the couch and stared at Phil hard at work, unable to hide the smile on his face. Phil's eyebrows were furrowed in concentration as he struggled to close the tripod. His tongue stuck out from the corner of his mouth, something that he only did when he was deep in thought. Strands of his blonde hair were strewn across his forehead. Dan felt adoration build up in his chest. It was funny how after so many years, he could still look at Phil and have his breath taken away.
Phil caught him staring and chuckled. "What?"
Dan smiled, leaning his head against his hand. "Nothing."
Phil smiled as he walked towards Dan, abandoning the task of dissembling their recording equipment. He crouched down and leaned closer to Dan, his nose only a few inches away.
Phil slowly wiped a crumb off the corner of Dan's mouth. "You have something on your face."
Dan could feel Phil's warm breath against him. He stared at his lips, and was suddenly reminded of the revelation that Phil had dropped on him today.
"Phil?" asked Dan.
"Yes?"
"Is it true what you said today? About you still having the video of us kissing in the first Phil is not on fire?"
Phil chuckled. "Yup. All of it caught on video."
"You are so reckless, you know that?" chuckled Dan. "Have you not learned your lesson on uploading unlisted videos onto your YouTube channel?"
"Well, younger Phil was a bit of an idiot, wasn't he?"
"Yeah, a horny idiot that's for sure," Dan said as he leaned in closer. "Tell me Philip Lester, how many times did you watch that video while we were apart?"
Phil gulped as a light blush appeared on his cheeks. He chuckled softly. "Well let's just say the view count was… in the hundreds."
Dan's jaw dropped. "Shit Phil, just how down bad for me were you?"
Phil scoffed. "Don't lie and pretend like you didn't watch that video an absurd amount of times too."
Dan's stomach fluttered as he remembered the late nights tucked underneath the covers, watching the grainy footage of him and Phil devouring each other's faces like they were starving. He used to close his eyes and imagine what it would've been like if Phil were there. Tried to remember the feeling of his soft lips pressed against his.
Dan felt his stomach churn as he stared at those same lips he used to dream about. "Show me."
Phil raised his eyebrow. "What?"
"Show me the video."
Phil tilted his head to the side, feigning an innocent look. "And how do you know if I still have it?"
Dan rolled his eyes. "Please Lester, I know you're too mad for me to delete it."
Phil smirked as he slowly stood up. "Fine. Wait here, I have to get my laptop."
Dan crossed his legs and fluttered his eyelashes. "Don't be gone too long darling."
Phil laughed as he walked away. "Don't wank off while I'm gone."
"Oi!" exclaimed Dan, as laughed giddily.
After a moment Phil came back into the living room with his laptops in his hands. He placed it on the table, and slowly lowered himself next to Dan. Phil opened the laptop and scoured through his files. Finally, he clicked a video simply titled "Whisker Kiss."
Dan smiled. "Couldn't have come up with a better name?"
"What, do you want me to name it 'That time I made with my internet stalker' instead?"
"How about, 'That time I made out with the love of my life?"
Phil smiled at Dan, his eyes brimming with adoration. He pressed a soft peck onto Dan's lips, before leaning back with a grin. "Just shut up and watch the video."
Dan smiled. "Well then, start it."
Phil turned back towards the laptop screen and clicked play.
The video started off with them laughing and answering questions like they did in the original Phil is not on fire video. Dan grinned as he dropped the paper and walked off screen to retrieve something. Phil turned his head to look at wherever Dan had ventured off to. His eyes softened, as a soft smile began to spread across his face.
"Where is it?" questioned Dan, the audio of the video grainy and muffled.
Phil continued gazing at Dan off screen, with eyes that were full of adoration
It made something in Dan's heart clench. They had only known each other for such a short time, yet still Phil looked at him like he had hung him the stars. He still did to this day.
Phil laughed softly, his tongue catching between his teeth. "What are you looking for, we're filming a video!"
After more ruffling sounds from off screen, Dan returned back into frame with a stuffed lion in his hands.
Dan chuckled as he rested the stuff animal onto Phil's shoulder. "It's Lion!"
Phil grinned. "What, is Lion the one asking me questions now?"
"Phil, please feed me, I haven't eaten in four days!" said Dan in an exaggerated high pitched voice.
Phil laughed, covering his mouth. "He does not sound like that! Why the hell does he sound like a demented Micky Mouse?!"
They continued laughing as Dan started to crack more jokes in an awful high pitched impression of Lion. Phil covered his mouth as he let out a soft giggle, something that he only did when Dan had made him laugh.
It was such a small gesture, yet Dan felt fondness building up in his chest as looked at the younger version of themselves laughing and fooling around. There was a hint of nervousness throughout their first meeting. Yet it seemed to dissipate as they bounced off each other's jokes like it was as easy as breathing. Like they had known each other their whole lives.
Dan turned towards the Phil who was sitting beside him, unable to hide the smile on his face. If he squinted enough, he could see remnants of the Phil he first fell in love with all those years ago.
Phil caught him staring and smiled. "We were really weird back then, huh?"
'Who says we're not now?" scoffed Dan.
"True," chuckled Phil. "It's just when I see this I feel so…"
"Nostalgic?" asked Dan.
"Yeah, something like that. It's just… I can't believe these two twinks are us," Phil pointed towards the screen.
"Imagine 2009 Phil seeing you now with blond hair."
Phil ran his hands through his hair, feigning a look of distress. "My beautiful emo fringe!"
Dan took a strand of Phil's soft blond hair, running it through his fingers. "Hm, I don't know. I think 2009 Dan would quite like the phlonde."
"I could've been bald, and 2009 Dan would still be drooling over me," scoffed Phil.
Dan chuckled, before turning back towards the screen. "Man, just how much did we talk in this video. I've been waiting for this kiss for ages!"
"Patience Danny boy, keep it in your pants," said Phil.
Dan rolled his eyes. "Says the one who literally saved a video of us making out seventeen years ago."
Phil opened his mouth to speak, but stopped as he turned the screen. "Wait, I think it's gonna happen now."
Dan laughed. "Oooo, are we finally getting some phan proof?"
A cheeky smile began to spread on Phil's face. "With what we're about to see? Yeah, you could say that."
Dan held up Lion next to Phil's shoulder, as Phil pressed a soft kiss to the stuffed animals nose.
"Is it fun being a man now?" asked Dan, whilst holding up Lion.
"Yeah, especially now that I've got my cordless hammer drill!" said Phil. He pulled up a heavy duty box containing the drill.
"Ooo, cordless hammer drill, how manly," cooed Dan.
Phil chuckled as he ran his hand across his forehead in embarrassment. "Shut up, I was trying to seem more straight!"
Phil in the video started flexing his muscles and curling a small dumbbell.
"Yeah, cause that definitely worked," scoffed Dan.
Dan failed suppress his smile. "Oh yeah."
They both burst into a fit of laughter, Dan leaning back to lay on the ground as Phil covered his mouth in his hands. Dan clutched his stomach, rolling onto his side as he failed to suppress his giggles.
"God you are so embarrassing!" chuckled Dan.
Phil stared down at Dan, a soft smile spreading across his face. "You love it."
Dan's giggles mellowed down as he lay on his back, looking up at Phil with adoration in his eyes. A tender smile appeared on his face.
"Doesn't change the fact that you're still cheesy," said Dan.
"Shut up," chuckled Phil.
Dan grinned as he slowly rested his fingers against Phil's hand. "Make me."
Suddenly the whole atmosphere of the room changed. The carefree foolishness from a couple of minutes ago had dissipated, now being replaced with a desperate heat. Phil stared at Dan with wanting eyes. His pupils had dilated, and his lips had slowly parted as he slowly shifted closer towards Dan.
Dan felt his heartbeat quicken as it pounded against his eardrums. His stomach churned as he saw video Phil inch closer and closer to video Dan. It felt as if there a swarm of butterflies fluttering around in his stomach. Even though the video was nearly seventeen years old at this point, he could still feel the heat of younger Phil's unwavering gaze, of the desperate need in his younger self's eyes as video Phil inched closer. Dan felt a soft warmth settle on his skin. It was Phil's hand resting on his knee, slowly stroking circles. Phil's cheeky grin was gone, now replaced with a nervous look of anticipation as his grip on Dan's knee tightened. A warmth bloomed in Dan's chest as he looked at Phil.
Phil brushed a strand of hair out of Dan's eyes, and cupped his face in his hand. Dan jerked up, now leaning back against his elbows for balance. He gazed up at Phil like he had hung the stars. Then slowly, Phil leaned in and pressed his lips against Dan's. It was gentle at first, as if they were testing the waters, unsure of how fast or how slow they wanted to take it. Then Dan wrapped his arms around Phil's neck and pulled him in closer. Phil groaned as Dan deepened the kiss, both of them falling onto the ground. They were now feverishly pressing their lips together, lost in the feeling of their bodies wrapped around each other.
He had told the camera that he hadn't remembered this moment. What a lie that was. He remembered it vividly. The feeling of Phil's soft lips pressing into his, the release of all the built up nervous energy in his body. Gentle hands running through his hair, grabbing and pulling his face as close as possible. Their teeth clashing together as they lost all rhythm. Dan remembered that warm sensation in his stomach all those years ago, the rush of falling hard and fast at such a young age. Yet now it permeated throughout his body. Phil's grip on his knee tightened, his gaze focused on the video, unable to to tear his eyes away. It was as if he were mesmerized.
Phil wrapped his arms around Dan's shoulders and pulled closer, deepening the kiss as he pushed him further down into the ground. Dan groaned as he wrapped his hand into Phil's hair, and tugged it down. For a while the only sound that was coming from the video was the noises of teeth clashing, heavy breathing and their lips smacking against each other.
Dan felt his mouth salivating as the warm sensation spread throughout his body. He gulped down and looked towards Phil.
He chuckled nervously. "D-Do we ever stop?"
'I…" Phil trailed off, mesmerized by the sight in front of him.
Now they had rolled to their side, whiskers smudged over their faces and their eyes glassy. Phil kissed him again whilst cupping Dan's face in his hands.
"Phil…" whined Dan against his lips.
Something about Dan whining his name like that seemed to set something in Phil off, as they began to kiss even more feverishly than before. They both moaned as they deepened the kiss, getting lost in each other's lips, and then Dan's hand slipped underneath Phil shirt and then—
Dan paused the video. His heartbeat hammered against his eardrums. It was if all of the breath had been stolen from his lungs.
Dan's mouth lay agape. "Phil… Did we fuck on YouTube?!"
"What, no?!" exclaimed Phil. "We stopped…. eventually."
"Phil, there are ten minutes left of this video!"
Phil exhaled shakily. "Man what was wrong with us back then? We were like a pair of rabbits."
"Yeah…" muttered Dan.
The warmth inside his body still lingered. Dan exhaled shakily, trying to even out his breathing. It shouldn't have affected him so much. Him and Phil had made out plenty of times. It was just…. It had been so long since they had been that close. With the podcast, preparations for the tour, and so many new videos, they barely had any time these days to do anything physical. Dan couldn't even remember the last time they'd kissed like how they did in the video. And seeing him and Phil like that…. Dan couldn't stop himself from feeling worked up.
Phil looked at Dan concerned. "Um, Dan are you okay?"
Dan skipped to the end of the video. "Yeah, let's just finish it."
Dan and Phil were still making out aggressively, before Phil leaned back, his eyes wide in surprise.
"What is it?" asked Dan.
"The video… It's still recording."
Dan's eyes widened as he looked directly at the camera and then back at Phil. Then, he burst into laughter before covering his face in embarrassment.
"Oh my god… I can't believe we forgot about the video!"
Phil dropped his head into Dan's shoulder and laughed. "It's your fault for distracting me!"
They both got up and started fixing their clothes. The marker ink was smudged all over their noses. Phil's hair was scattered across his face, sticking up in every direction.
Dan smoothed out his hair, and rubbed at his nose. "You're going to edit this part out, right?"
"No, I want all my followers to see us aggressively snog for thirty minutes," chuckled Phil.
Dan rolled his eyes. "Shut up."
"Make me," mocked Phil.
Dan burst into laughter, looking at Phil with adoration in his eyes. Phil leaned into his shoulder, failing to suppress his giggle as he caught his tongue in his teeth, looking at the camera with a cheeky grin.
Then the video stopped. And with that, both he and Phil were left to sit in the heated atmosphere they had created. Dan was quiet for a while, fiddling his shirt, thinking of any joke that he could crack to ease the tension. Yet no words came. Thankfully, he never needed words with Phil. Somehow, he just always knew.
Phil placed his hand on top of Dan's. "Are you okay?"
Dan wrapped his fingers around Phil's. "Yeah it's just… I didn't expect it to be so…."
"Intense?"
"Yeah… Just seeing that again. It brought back all these memories of how things were at the start" said Dan. "Back then, everything we did felt so unbelievably important. It was like… It was like I was diving headfirst into cold water. No dipping in my toes or anything, just going straight for what I wanted. And it was so scary how much I felt for you, but it was so…
"Exhilarating?" asked Phil.
Dan chuckled. "Yeah. Basically, that was just a fancy way of saying I was extremely horny and desperate."
Phil smiled softly, leaning his head into Dan's shoulder. "Yeah…. We really couldn't get enough of each other, could we?"
Dan rested his chin on top of Phil's head, burying his nose into his hair. He inhaled the flowery scent, different from the musky smell he was used to.
"You changed your shampoo..." whispered Dan.
Phil lifted his head out of Dan's shoulder and gazed directly at him. The mischievous look from before was gone. Now all that remained was Phil's wanting eyes staring back at him. Dan felt his heart beat rapidly in his chest, his stomach fluttering as he got lost in the endless blue of his irises.
Dan rested his forehead against Phil's. "It's been so long since we've kissed like that."
Phil hummed. "Work's been keeping you busy, hasn't it Danny?"
Dan chuckled softly. "You know I lied when I said I didn't remember us kissing back then, right?"
"I know."
"I used to watch that video all the time," said Dan. "Whenever I'd be sick of missing you, I'd load up it up and just try to remember how your lips felt like on mine. Imagine what you would do if you were there with me."
Phil placed his hand on Dan's thigh. "And what did you imagine me doing?"
Dan scoffed, a faint blush on his cheeks. "You already know."
Phil took Dan's face in his hands, leaning in closer. "You know, I've always wanted to recreate that first Phil is not fire kiss."
Phil was staring intently at Dan's lips now, making his stomach churn.
Dan's mouth started salivating as he gulped down and let out a low chuckle. "What, and get cat whiskers all over our faces again—"
Phil pressed his lips against Dan's, effectively shutting him up. Dan let out a noise in surprise, before leaning into the kiss, letting his hands run along Phil's waist. Phil deepened the kiss, pushing further into Dan, half sitting in his lap. He ran his hands through his hair, gripping the bundle of curls at the base of his neck and pulling him closer. Dan groaned as he wrapped his arms around Phil's neck, pushing both of them onto the floor. They both rolled onto their sides, arms wrapped around each other, pulling in as close as possible. Dan bit Phil's lip, causing him to whine.
Dan pulled back for a moment, before pressing in more kisses onto his lips to soothe the ache. "Sorry."
"It's been so long since we've done this," muttered Phil against Dan's lips.
Dan pressed another kiss onto Phil's lips. "I know. I missed this. Missed you."
Phil smiled softly. "I missed you too. Now get back to work."
Dan chuckled before kissing Phil again, this time with more desperation. Dan got lost in Phil's lips, his breathing heavy as a warm sensation spread throughout his body. Phil rolled both of them over, now laying on top of Dan, kissing the life out him. Dan didn't care about the video anymore. Didn't care about their tour responsibilities, or their podcast or the leak in their house that they needed to repair. All he could focus on was the softness of Phil's lips. The gentle hands running through his hair, tugging his face closer and closer. A desperate heat grew inside him. And god, he wanted Phil to feel it too. Dan ran his hands underneath Phil's shirt, feeling the soft skin of his back. Phil ground his hips down, causing to Dan to moan and wrap his arms around Phil's neck.
"Phil…" whined Dan against Phil's lips.
Something about the way Dan sounded saying his name seemed to awaken something in Phil, just like it did all those years ago. He deepened the kiss, pressing fervently into his lips, trying to coax more sounds out of Dan. Phil leaned back, and began pressing kisses against the side of Dan's neck. He slowly trailed down.
"Keep going," whispered Dan, running his hands through Phil's hair.
Dan felt like he was in a state of bliss, his head above the clouds. This must've been what heaven felt like. Laying in his dream home, with the man he loved kissing him like he was the most important thing in the world. It felt like nothing could take him down.
Then Phil's phone rang. They paused for a moment, breathing heavily against each other's faces.
Phil looked into Dan's eyes, his mouth agape. "Should we… just ignore it?"
Dan sighed, letting his head fall back onto the floor. "Just… pick it up."
Phil wiped his mouth and stumbled to where his phone was laying on the couch.
He picked up the phone, pressing it to his ear. "Hello? Oh hello, Steven." Phil was breathing heavily. "Am I okay? Yeah I'm just… exercising."
Dan chuckled as Phil glared at him, unable to suppress his smile. "Oh you're coming soon to fix the leak? Oh yeah that's…. That's great. Yeah, okay just let us know when you're here. Okay, goodbye."
Phil hung up and stared at Dan, his eyes downcast. "The builders are coming to fix the leak in a few minutes."
Dan sighed, running his hands over his face. "Goddammit, why the hell do they always cock-block us?!"
Phil chuckled. "Cock-blocked by the camera in 2009, then cock-blocked by the builders in 2026."
Dan got up from the floor, now sitting cross legged. "Shut up."
Phil grinned as moved in closer and crouched in front of Dan. He tilted Dan's chin towards him. "Later. After the builders are gone."
Dan failed to suppress a grin as he pecked Phil's lips. "Whatever you say Philly."
"Maybe this time we could put whiskers on each other. Like old times."
Dan chuckled. "We are not fucking with whiskers on our faces!"
Phil smiled cheekily. "Why not? It'll be fun. Could be like our gateway into pet play."
Dan playfully shoved Phil. "Shut up you perv. Leave the cat whiskers alone."
Phil chuckled as Dan stood up. When Dan turned to talk to Phil, he froze. He stood there unaware of how beautiful he was, hair messy and cheeks still flushed. When Dan looked into Phil's eyes, he swore he could see the traces of the Phil he first fell in love with, all carefree and full of life. His gaze softened as he watched Phil attempt to adjust his messy hair and fold down the creases of his shirt. Even after so much time, he still found himself in awe of Phil, unable to find the words to express how much he meant to him.
Phil caught Dan staring, a soft smile spreading across his face. "What?"
Dan shook his head. "Nothing."
"Liar" scoffed Phil as he walked over to the laptop to close it.
Phil turned towards Dan and looked him up and down, taking in the sight of him as a smile spread across his face.
He walked over to Dan and wrapped his arms around him. "I love you, you know that?"
Dan chuckled as he hugged Phil back. "Where did that come from?"
"It came from my undying horniness for you," Phil rolled his eyes. "That and a bit of love mixed in to, I guess."
Dan smiled, tightening his arms around Phil. "I love you too, you sap."
He felt Phil smile into his shoulder, and he swore his heart nearly burst out of his chest.