Work Text:
Just walk…
Get to the pub, and everything will be fine. You want a drink, right?
Get to the pub, AJ. Get a drink. Lie down.
Those instructions in the girl’s head became harder to listen to with each step.
Turns out getting buried alive under a mountain and punching stone to get out wasn’t good for your body. Who could’ve known?
AJ, certainly, since with each step closer to the Academy exit, then the main bridge, then the village, she became increasingly dizzy. The rocks and trees blurred together into a cruel and amalgamated mess of green and gray, taking over the sky, even. Was it night? Day? AJ couldn’t tell.
Perhaps the world had ended.
She was the only one here, after all.
The Mage knew that Flick was probably flying behind her, following, chirping, begging her to go to her dorm or find Drift. Maybe the sick people place. Somewhere.
But AJ wasn’t entirely sure her ears were still there. A panging static rung over and over. If she had ears, she would hear the crashing of the river against the bridge. She’d hear what Flick was saying. The breezing of the wind and the slowing beating of her heart.
But AJ heard none of that.
Was her body still there? She felt fine right after coming up from the ground.
Not anymore. Each limb felt as if it were hanging on by one tendon each, and whenever she moved, it pulled on it. One tendon, wrapping her still together.
Get to the…
The—
AJ reached back into her mind, no longer moving, for just a second, desperately trying to recall where she was and where she was going.
Lost?
Am I lost?
Can’t be lost. Can’t be forgotten. She will remember me, she will come.
In her heart, in her stomach, if they were even still there, AJ knew there was someone. Someone who cared, who wouldn’t let her stay lost.
Brown hair, she thought. It was a blur, everything was. Open…
“AJ?”
“AJ!”
The Mage didn’t even notice she was on the ground. She must be close to the pub, though, right? Yes! The pub. That’s where she wanted to go. The pub.
She must be close.
But… last time AJ checked… the pub didn’t have the most beautiful voice she’d ever heard?
__________
Ugh.
That was the first coherent thought she had.
Followed up by: this fucking hurts.
AJ expected to move her hand and feel the dirt. Even grass, stone, perhaps.
But as AJ twitched the fingers of her right hand, eyes still shut in pain and body still lost, her fingers couldn’t— find anything? It was like there was some kind of bandage, wrapping her fingers together.
Or maybe climbing out just fucked them up that badly. So now she couldn’t feel anymore.
Desperate, AJ did the same to her left hand.
A twitch of a couple fingers, reaching down to whatever surface she was laying upon, and rubbing it so softly.
It wasn’t dirt. Wasn’t grass, wasn’t stone.
No, it was linen. Like bed sheets?
Did I walk home? AJ wondered for a split second. Had she collapsed on her bed or something? That didn’t sound like her. After a day like that, she’d want the pub. A drink. Or twenty,
I did go to the pub! I remember walking…
And then…
And then, what?
And then her vision had blurred and the pub started speaking to her.
Okay. I’m crazy now. Good to know.
Except, where the hell am I?
AJ tried to open her eyes. It just— it was hard, okay? Her eyelids felt sewed shut, like someone had personally threaded them together so she could never see.
Eventually, a peek of light broke through. Agh.
Fighting the urge to close her eyes and go back to sleep, AJ pulled her eyelids off from each other, slowly blinking as the soft lights materialised in front of her.
There were green blobs everywhere. Lanterns, too. With wood. Or at least a colour that looked like wood.
With enough blinking, she realised the green globs were, in fact, leaves.
She looked down.
A bed.
A bed she’d seen before.
With a loft above she’d been in, and leaves she’d admired already, next to a dresser she hid one of her hoodies in once.
Drift’s room.
The entire dorm was oddly comforting. Like a big, warm hug that AJ didn’t deserve.
Until she tried to move, and realised she barely could.
The Mage’s right hand was wrapped in a thick gauze and bandage, tied together so strongly her wrist felt strangled, whilst the rest of her body was horribly sore.
“What the fuck…” She swore under her breath, wincing as she tried to push upwards, yet couldn’t.
How did she get here?
Distressed, AJ’s eyes searched the room for Drift. For the one person that—
Whatever.
Drift wasn’t there.
But she must have been, right? It was her dorm after all. No one would pick AJ up off the ground and carry her to Drift’s dorm. It must’ve been Drift who did it.
With each racing thought, AJ got more worried. Where was Drift, then? Was she okay? She wasn’t here!
“Drift?” She cried out softly, her voice cracking at the end. Of course. She didn’t speak for two days under that soil. Plus, who knew how long she’d been out in Drift’s bed?
There was no reply. AJ huffed, and coughed, preparing to try again. “Open Book? I’m— I’m awake! What’s going on?”
Her voice became louder with each word, no doubt echoing throughout the dorm.
Yet, still, Drift did not reply. She must actually not be here.
“Real responsible, Drift. Leaving me alone like this.” AJ muttered to herself, mostly joking in attempt to lighten the situation.
At least, she hoped Drift was taking care of her. A, because she’d get to see Drift again, and B, because someone had changed her clothes and washed the dirt off her. Drift was… perhaps the only person AJ wanted to see her like this. Weak, pathetic, half-dead.
Looking at the ceiling, AJ groaned to herself. Of course, she wakes up, and nobody’s here.
“Open Book? Come on, don’t hide.” She whined, trying for the last time, before inspecting her body more deeply. There were more bandages all over her. Yes, her right hand was tied up, but there was one around her head, a thin bandage wrapped around AJ’s left elbow, and probably more on her legs that she couldn’t see from over the blanket.
“I got up from the crypt. Flick was there. I recalled. Walked to the pub. I got to the pub. Right? I got to the pub?” AJ began whispering to herself in deep focus, eyebrows furrowing together as she tried desperately to piece together how Drift might have found her. “I went to the pub. Did I get a drink?”
Her thinking was interrupted as the dorm door unlocked.
The sound was loud and clear in the quiet of the dorm.
AJ’s head snapped upwards right as the door opened, staring straight at Drift.
For just a quick moment, her heart stopped.
AJ didn’t think about anything.
Two days. It’s been at least two days.
Since she saw Drift.
And— God. It was a breath of fresh air.
Although, she didn’t look well. Not as bad as AJ. But not normal Drift. Not Open Book.
She was dulled, her skin slightly darker. Circles under her eyes which definitely weren’t there before — AJ looked at her eyes a lot — and messy hair. Drift always looked unnaturally manicured. Even in the middle of a dungeon, or swimming after a date, her hair seemed perfectly curled, eyes sparkling like a special kind of make-up had been used. Constantly curled eyelashes, and a permanent blush.
None of that was there, now.
If AJ looked like Death, Drift looked like she was Decaying.
And, somehow, AJ knew it was her fault.
“AJ? You— you’re awake.” Drift stuttered over herself, letting the door shut behind her, and taking a careful step forward. “You’re awake.” She whispered.
“Uh, yeah, Open Book.” AJ grinned as she tried to wave hello with her left hand, but winced as it hurt a bit too much. “Miss me?”
Drift stared. Then, she walked forward. “Miss you? Miss you? AJ! Do you know how worried I was?”
She was by AJ’s bed now, staring down at her with an angry, worried expression. It almost scared the Death Mage.
“I—”
“No. You don’t talk. You don’t get to talk.” She hissed at her, taking a glass of water from the bedside table and bringing it to AJ’s lips, pushing it in. AJ had no choice but to drink it. “You don’t get to talk after that. I was worried sick. You wouldn’t wake up, I—”
“Wait, wait, wait, wouldn’t wake up?” AJ laughed to herself, but Drift could sense the concern in her tone, no matter how veiled it was. “How long have I been out?”
Open Book softened, body language relaxing just a bit. “AJ, it’s been, like, four days.”
“Four— four days? I’ve been unconscious for four days?” She near-shouted, to which Drift stuffed some more water in her mouth.
“Yes! Do you know bad you were? AJ. I mean— you were bad.”
Finishing her sip of the water, AJ chuckled uncomfortably. “Flirting with a patient, Open Book? I know I’m bad, but…”
That just about made Drift snap. “You think this is funny?”
Fuck. I’m cooked.
AJ tried to backtrack immediately, but it was too late. “No, I—”
“I’ve spent four days asking every person I knew what happened to you. If they knew what was wrong. The infirmary has been full, so I’ve been taking care of you! Everyday, I go look for some stupid herb or mushroom which might help you, and I don’t even know if it will! If you’ll wake up the next day! I thought you were fucking gone! And now you’re joking about it?”
Drift’s eyes were shaking, looking over AJ’s body in desperation. Her face was hurt, almost a minute away from breaking down in tears.
AJ didn’t know what to say.
“Hey. Open Book, it’s okay. I’m okay now.” She tried frantically to comfort Drift, who kept freaking out.
“No! No! I saw you collapse,” she ran a hand through her hair, beginning to pace around the room as AJ could only watch, “literally collapse on the ground near the tent. You weren’t moving, you know? You couldn’t talk or hear me, you could barely breathe! You were gone, you stayed in that damn crypt, and you almost died because of it! This isn’t fucking funny.”
“I didn’t say it was. Did I?” AJ asked in a whisper, trying to calm her fake girlfriend down. “And whatever you did worked, because here I am, Open Book. In all my glory. Aren’t I?”
She didn’t answer, looking away from AJ.
There was a sniff.
“Oh, Open Book. Come here. Come on.” AJ whispered. “Don’t cry. I don’t want to make you cry.”
“I’m not crying!” She hissed over her shoulder, still not turning around.
“I can hear you sniffling.”
“It’s allergies.”
“You don’t have allergies.”
“Yes, I do.”
“No, you don’t. No crying, please, I’m begging you.”
“Well, I begged you to not let me recall alone. And guess what happened?”
That shut AJ up. A wave of guilt came over her, and she didn’t know why. It was the right decision, or at least she thought so.
“Open Book. I’m sorry. But you had to get out of there. I promised I’d protect you. I don’t break my promises. Not to you.” AJ confessed, hoping that Drift would just turn around and stop sniffling.
Thankfully, she did turn around, but this time, she was angry again. “I didn’t have to get out of there! You could’ve come with me, you know!”
“I needed to do it.”
“To do what? What even happened down there, AJ?”
She looked away, and let out a shaky sigh. She wasn’t getting out of this, was she?
Drift stared, waiting for an answer.
Fine. AJ took as large of an inhale as her lungs would let her, preparing for this. “Um. You know how there was a voice, talking to me, before?” AJ spoke carefully, glancing at Drift, who looked scared for her answer. “Well, there were kind of these doors? And when I stood there, in front of the doors, the voice came back. It spoke to me, that it wanted me.”
“Okay… and then?” Open Book pushed, calming down from her tears, although there weren’t too many to begin with.
“It— like. Okay. You know what happened to you, with the, um, bandit?” Drift nodded slowly. “It did that to me.”
The girl in front of AJ paled. “In the crypt?”
“Yeah.”
“Who got you out?”
“I did.” She whispered. “I dug my way out. That’s why I was gone for so long.”
It was scary to admit, because it just made it more real. And of all things, AJ did not want it more real. She wanted to put it in a box and put it in a grave. To forget about that feeling of dirt in your lungs and grass in your nose.
“AJ.” Drift walked closer, looking like she almost in shock. “You… there’s no way. You can’t be serious.”
AJ just laughed, but not very humorously. “How do you think I fucked up my hand so bad? Punching stone through a mountain will do that to you.”
AJ risked a glance to see Drift’s face, and, God, her expression was imprinted into her brain. A terrible mix of worry, horror, and anger. It was a face no one had cared enough about AJ to give her before.
“Please tell me you’re lying. Please, AJ. Tell me I didn’t leave you there to dig through a mountain all—” Drift started whispering quickly, speeding over her words as a sob made its way through her throat.
AJ stopped her. “Open Book. Stop. I did that to myself. There was nothing you could’ve done.”
“No— I— I should’ve known you would…”
“You couldn’t have known!”
“I could! I know you!”
“Open Book. Drift.”
“Stop it. Don’t comfort me. This is all…”
“My fault. It’s my fault.”
Drift started shaking her head rapidly, to which AJ let out a worried laugh, almost scared of her reaction. “Don’t blame yourself, please. I don’t beg, but I’m begging you.”
“But—”
“Who took care of me, hey? Who nursed me back to health when she found me all alone? You did. No one else. My Open Book did.”
Drift blinked slowly.
“You didn’t do this to me. You saved me.”
“I saved you?”
“Yeah. Yeah, tell me what you did. How did you save me?”
“I, um…” The Earth Mage whispered to herself, almost in shock, “I tried to wake you up. But you— you were gone. I thought you were dead. I carried you back to my dorm, because I knew Violet was busy with the civilians, and I called Ros. She checked if you were alive, and you were. Then I, um, cleaned the dirt from your hand and legs. It was so bad, AJ. You could see your bones. Your hand… I couldn’t tell what was skin and what was dirt.”
“That’s pretty bad.”
“Yeah. But… at least I’m an Earth Mage, you know? So, I cleaned out your wounds. And wrapped them. But you were still unconscious. Ros said you weren’t dead, but… you looked gone, AJ. I didn’t… sometimes I wasn’t sure you were breathing.” Drift cleared her throat, and AJ felt better as she saw the girl’s eyes clear up, no longer almost crying. “There were herbs and mushrooms I thought would help, so I went foraging. Ros would come by and help your organs or something. And now, you woke up.”
AJ smiled at her, for the first time since she woke up, feeling oddly proud of Drift. She’d done all that, just to make AJ feel better. AJ didn’t even have to ask. “Damn. Maybe you should be Smart One, huh? Doing all that to make me feel better?”
A grin broke out on Drift’s face, but it was quickly squashed. “Don’t joke. I’m still cross with you.”
“Oh, I know, Open Book. I know.”
Open Book stared at her. “I’m so happy you’re… alive. I really thought…”
“I didn’t die. Am I dead? No. I’m talking, aren’t I?”
“Somehow.” Drift muttered, running a hand through AJ’s short hair. “You shouldn’t have survived, AJ.”
“I know.”
“But, there’s something I don’t understand.”
“What don’t you understand?” AJ frowned.
Don’t ask me about my powers. Don’t ask me about my powers.
Drift took a moment to answer. “You had no mana, right? That’s why you couldn’t recall, and why it took so long for you to heal?” AJ nodded slowly, not wanting the conversation to continue. “I thought it was just because the crypt took your mana. But it would’ve come back, after you left. It did, right? You managed to recall home. But you couldn’t heal properly. That’s why it took you so long to wake up.”
AJ didn’t dare say anything. It was like watching a feral animal walk closer to you, going through your items.
“The only way your mana would still be low after the crypt, is if it were low to begin with.” Drift spoke carefully. Her words were loaded, and a pit entered AJ’s stomach.
She knew where this was going.
“Drift. Don’t.” The injured girl whispered.
“But how could that happen? Why would your mana be low?”
“I’m serious. Stop it.” Her voice was soft and begging.
“Then, as I was cleaning the dirt off you, I realised. AJ, your muscle is almost gone. Your ribs… they shouldn’t be coming out that much.”
“Drift.”
They stared at each other, and AJ blinked away the stinging of her eyes. She couldn’t bear to look at her right now.
“Have you not been eating, AJ?”
The injured girl only stared in front of her, at the blanket.
“Because… since I realised, I’ve been replaying every single time we’ve been together in my head. When we go through the halls, or to the battlefield. You can’t keep up. You only drink coffee. And I haven’t seen you eat in— I can’t remember.”
“What are you saying, Drift?” AJ sighed.
“I’m saying,” she spoke carefully, “that you haven’t been eating. And I don’t know why.”
AJ didn’t reply, and she wasn’t sure she would at all.
“Me either.” She muttered, finally.
“So— so you haven’t?”
“You said it yourself, didn’t you?”
“I hoped I was wrong.”
“Me too.”
“AJ. Why? Why hurt yourself like this?”
“Because I’m dangerous, Drift. I am! You pretend I’m not, but, my powers… they hurt people.” AJ almost yelled out. Not because she was mad at Drift, anything but that, but because it hurt to say.
“Your— your powers are fine, AJ.”
“They aren’t. They really, really aren’t.”
“Why wouldn’t they be? You barely use them—”
“Because I don’t want to hurt anybody else!” She cried. “And if I don’t eat, I don’t have high mana. And if I don’t have high mana—”
“You can’t use your powers. Whatever they are.” Drift finished, sadly.
“Sure. Whatever! You know— it, it doesn’t matter. I’m fine, everyone is fine…”
“Everyone isn’t fine! Do I look fine, to you, AJ? I’m a mess! Because of you.” Drift raised her voice. “So, I don’t care anymore. You are going to eat. You are going to take care of yourself. If I have to make you every step of the way, I will. Do not test me.”
“Drift. Open Book, that’s—”
“Don’t say it’s crazy. Crazy is me not knowing if you were dead as I carried you to my dorm. This is not crazy.”
AJ sighed. She stared at the girl who she made worry, made cry, made take care of her. “I’ll hurt you.”
“You’ve already hurt me.”