Work Text:
How would an android develop fear of heights, and how could an android get rid of it?
That's what Connor was typing into the search engine on the laptop.
The LED on his temple flickered yellow while he scrolled. The android had recently realized that he felt... well, uncomfortable above ground. Specifically, skyscrapers constructed from tempered, laminated, or insulated glass. That was only slowing down his progress during missions. Naturally, he would kindly ask the fear of heights to 'fuck off'.
"Connor." Hank crossed his arms.
The Connor in question either pretended not to hear the lieutenant or was genuinely too absorbed in his research. Either possibility was plausible.
Connor furrowed his brows. Unfortunately for him, no essays had been published on this specific matter, so he had to research the human fear of heights instead.
He scanned a few articles and came to the conclusion that he rather disliked the advice they provided, which was unsurprising but nevertheless disappointing.
"CONNOR!"
Hank yelled directly into his ear.
The LED flashed red for a second.
...Maybe more than a second. About 1.5 seconds.
Connor looked away from the screen.
"Yes?"
His eyes remained fixed on the lieutenant while his fingers continued moving across the keyboard.
The articles recommended exposure therapy.
Connor considered the suggestion for approximately 0.5 seconds.
...
While it was a very good suggestion...
He would rather not.
"Your coin. Do you want it back?" the lieutenant asked, sounding exasperated.
Connor froze. The LED on his temple switched from yellow to blue.
"...Preferably."
Hank tossed the coin toward him.
Connor caught it and immediately resumed his familiar coin tricks.
He took another coin from his pocket.
Excellent.
Now he had two.
"You've gotta be kidding me," Hank said, pinching the bridge of his nose.
As the coins clicked rhythmically between his fingers, Connor replied. "I had acquired a new one earlier."
"...How?"
"...The CyberLife tower."
Acquired was, perhaps, not the most accurate description. But the second coin's previous owner certainly didn't need it anymore, so perhaps it wasn't that far off.
"Oh, hell no. I think one is fucking enough for you."
Hank clapped the laptop shut—perhaps with more force than necessary—and tried to take the coin away from Connor.
That was a mistake.
Connor's LED flickered yellow. The android immediately hid both coins inside his jacket, oddly protective of them.
"I am sorry, Hank, but since I am a deviant now, the answer is 'No'."
The two stared at each other in silence. After several seconds, Hank looked as though he was about to say something. Instead, the human reconsidered and simply shrugged.
"...Fine."
The lieutenant walked away, muttering to himself. His destination was the coffee machine. He was going to make himself a cup of coffee.
And would probably end up drinking the whole pot. Maybe.
Hank was almost certain that the android smirked. Whatever.
Frickin' androids and their coins.
He chugged down the entire pot of coffee.
Connor watched the human with curiosity. The LED flickered yellow before settling back to blue as the android reopened the laptop.
Is drinking an entire pot of coffee unhealthy for humans?