Archive of Our Own

Bzzzzzz-zzzzzt. 

Bzzzzzz-zzzzzt.

Alec’s face distorted into a sneer as the sound of his mobile vibrating on the coffee table cut through his peaceful Saturday morning. Putting his mug aside he reached for it without glancing at the screen. They had wrapped up a long and tiring case of arson just the previous night, and Alec had been looking forward to some time to decompress. Daisy was away with Tess, conveniently planned to avoid her having to spend the weekend all on her own in case Alec had to work late. When a late Friday spent in CID led to an unexpected resolution, Alec had still been glad to return to an empty house in the small hours of the morning. 

“What?” He barked into the device, wondering whether it was Daniels or Miller calling him out for yet another small-town mishap. 

“Um, sorry, it’s, um. It’s Tom…Miller.” Alec sat up straighter on his sofa, halfway out of his seat with just a couple of words. 

“Tom. Everything a’right?” He rarely spoke to Ellie’s eldest and vice versa, except for awkward exchanges of stilted small talk fuelled by Tom’s teenage clumsiness and Alec’s ineptitude at anything social. If Tom was calling him though, that meant something was wrong. “Everything okay at home? With your Mum?” 

“I don’t think so. She’s just acting weird. She was really grumpy this morning. Fred left his truck in the hallway and she tripped on it, but she was way madder than usual, and when Freddy started crying she didn’t apologize like normal, she just got a weird look on her face. And she’s in her room now and won’t come out. I think maybe her head hurts, but I don’t know how to tell for sure and she won’t answer me,” Tom rambled, his voice a mixture of insecurity, helplessness and fear. 

Alec winced. That did not sound like the Miller he knew - not with her sons, at least. He was well-used to getting one or two biting remarks even before his first cuppa, but that was just them.  Snapping at Tom and especially wee Fred was another matter entirely. Ellie adored her sons and, after her family fell apart so cruelly in the resolution of Danny’s case, had raised her parental standards to another level. To him, the change in behavior hinted at a physical ailment. They had a long week, working overtime and spending a lot of night peering at stacks of files in the dim emergency lighting of CID well after everyone else had left. It was possible the stress was simply catching up with her. 

Alec thought back to Tom’s words. “I think maybe her head hurts.” Migraine, he concluded. 

“Right. That helps, Tom, thanks. Can you remember if she’s gotten a headache like this before?” Alec asked as he stood up and briskly walked into the hallway, his phone tucked awkwardly between his chin and shoulder as he collected his phone, wallet, key as well as a jumper and mac while he listened to Tom and made a couple of affirmative noises in the right places. Every bit of information about what state Miller was in helped, but his main goal was to keep Tom talking, distracted and calm. He was only fifteen. Fred was five. With Ellie incapacitated, that was too much of a responsibility for Tom to carry. 

“I think so, when Fred was younger. Da- Joe was, um. He usually helped Mum.” Alec nodded, only then remembering that the boy could not see. His heart clenched painfully at how much the whole family had to go through these past few years and how quickly especially Tom had to grow up because of it. 

“I’m already on my way. Five minutes. Can you let me in?” 

The line went dead as Alec got into his car to drive the short distance to the Miller house. The door was already open by the time he parked his car on the kerb, with Tom standing  in the open doorway and Fred pressed against his sides. Both boys looked shaken, reminding Alec of witnesses at the site of a car crash. Not hurt, but helpless in their shock. 

Taking a deep breath, Alec crossed the small driveway, the gravel crunching under the soles of his shoes. Despite his day off he was dressed in trousers and a button-down shirt with a sweater on top. Not quite as formal as inside CID, but not casual enough to put Tom at ease. 

“You did good, calling me,” Alec assured as he entered the house and briefly reached out to squeeze the boy’s shoulder. He could feel the tension leave Tom’s body at the praise and he relaxed a little more himself. It was not just Ellie who needed him. Before he was fully inside the house, Fred had already left his brother’s side and latched onto Alec’s leg instead, holding on with both hands as he looked up at him. 

“Mum’s hurt,” he whispered and Alec nodded slowly.

“Aye, I know. We’ll fix it,” he said softly, doing his best to reassure the youngest Miller. 

“I put all my trucks away so she won’t get mad again,” Fred added and Alec’s smile faltered and morphed into a sad frown. 

“She’s not mad at you, lad. She’s just not feeling well,” he explained and gently pried Fred’s hands away from around his thigh, taking the boy’s hand. “Come on, can you show me where your Mum is?”

They made their way slowly and carefully up the stairs onto the first floor. A colourful decorated door to the left with dinosaur stickers marked it as Fred’s room while another door next to it sported signs of decorations that had been removed. The white wood only featured a sign in the shape of a game controller with yellow letters underneath spelling ‘Keep Out’. Tom’s room. 

“There’s Mumma’s room,” Fred whispered almost apprehensively and pointed to a door on the right towards the back of the landing. He made no move to get any closer. Tom stood a little back as well and Alec understood the boys’ anxiety well enough. 

“I’ll check on your Mum, alright? See if she needs anything. Why don’t you wait downstairs?” he gently suggested and Fred nodded, reaching up to take Tom’s hand and retreat when Alec kept his brother back. “Do you have anything other than breakfast tea? Peppermint, maybe? She should try to drink something,” he explained and Tom nodded. 

“Think so.” Tom shrugged. “We’ll have a look. Come on, Freddy.” The soft footsteps of both boys disappeared down the stairs as Alec approached Miller’s bedroom. He raised a hand as if to knock, then thought better of it. He would just let himself in and keep Ellie from unnecessary talk. 

The door opened with a soft click and thankfully no creak. Alec gingerly stepped on the floorboards, hoping not to make a sound there either as his eyes adjusted to the dusk in the room. It was dim, but not so dark Alec could not see and after a moment he could make out the rough shapes of the bedroom furniture with a double bed as the centrepiece. On it he spotted a lump under the duvet, curled into a tight ball and hands pressed to her face. At the sound of Alec entering she tensed further and seemed to shrink and make herself even smaller. 

“It’s me,” Alec whispered. “Don’t talk. It’ll just make you hurt worse.” he crept closer on soft feet, going down on his knees so he was at eye level with Ellie. At the sound of his voice she took her hands away to reveal a flushed and tear-streaked face. 

“What are you doing here? Get out,” she hissed, ignoring Alec’s plea to not make herself feel any worse. 

Alec ignored it for once and did not rise to the bait. 

“Have you taken anything for it?” he asked gently and Ellie buried her head in the duvet again. Her breath sounded loud and slightly ragged in the room, letting him know without her saying just how shitty Ellie felt. 

“Fuck off.” 

Alec chose to interpret it as a ‘no’ and nodded to himself. He kept standing in the room, unsure what to do with himself and how to help Ellie when she chose to be so prickly when behind him the door widened again. Tom carefully peeked into the room, a mug of tea in his hand. He reached out and pushed it into Alec’s hand before quickly whipping his head out again. Alec assumed he had been on the bad side of his mother already and wanted to minimise chances for another skirmish. 

Peppermint tea, Alec deduced from the smell as he placed the cup on her bedside table and once more sank down beside Ellie’s bed. 

She squeezed her eyes shut and groaned, wishing Alec would just go away and leave her alone again. She felt like someone was trying to split her skull open from the inside out using a crowbar or maybe a jackhammer. Despite the darkness in the room, silver bursts of lightning were dancing in front of her eyes and her brain felt like it was sloshing around in her skull like an apple in a bowl of water, hitting the rim as soon as she moved just a fraction. Even lying still Ellie felt motion sickness and the nagging sense of a guilty conscience. She dimly remembered yelling at Fred when she got up that morning, but she had been feeling like death warmed over already and the screeching sound of his toy truck had just made pain erupt behind her eyelids like an explosion of fireworks inside her head. Fred’s crying had amplified that feeling until it became unbearable and Ellie could not form a single coherent thought or even get her body to function well enough to carry her back to bed without stopping at the downstairs loo first. 

“Tom’s made you tea. Try to drink something,” Alec whispered gently, reminding Ellie of his presence in her bedroom. It made her want to groan but secretly she was glad not to be alone anymore, especially thinking about Tom and Fred. 

She wanted to nod but moving her head was a bad idea, so instead she gave a weak sigh and blinked once hoping to get the message across. She had not had a migraine as bad as this one for years and could only assume it was the stress and long nights of their latest case catching up with her all at once. She still had some medication in the bathroom cabinet for emergencies, but forming the words and giving out clear instructions felt like an insurmountable obstacle. 

“Tom said you had it before,” Alec softly murmured. Ellie wished he would just stop talking. He was not usually one to say much and she hated that he had apparently decided to change his habits on that specific day. 

“Mhh,” she groaned. “Medic- ugh…pillz… bathroom cabi-,” Ellie muttered, her words slurring as if she was drunk but Alec must have got something out of it as he stood up and headed out into the hallway. Ellie sighed and sank deeper into the mattress. Even that short exchange had completely depleted her. 

Contrary to Miller’s bedroom Alec knew the upstairs bathroom quite well as he had stayed over at the Miller house on many previous occasions during late nights working on a case. He took one look at the bathroom cabinets and chose the one that was highest up, remembering his own time as a parent to a young child where anything dangerous was kept well out of reach. 

The first door revealed spare toothpaste, mouth wash and a few bits and pieces of make-up but on his second try Alec got lucky. All three shelves were stacked with painkillers, cough syrup, various flu medications, chest rub, condoms - Alec quickly pushed those behind another bottle and continued his search until he came across a promising box. Imigran. The package insert proved him right, confirming that it was indeed migraine medication and should help to, if not stop, then lessen the symptoms of the attack. 

Picking up a cup that stood overturned at the sink he filled it with a bit of water from the tap, grabbed the medication and made his way back into the bedroom. Ellie had not changed her position at all, but she seemed marginally more relaxed at least. Alec crouched down next to her without speaking and offered her the cup as well as one of the tablets from the pack. They were huge and Alec’s throat constricted uncomfortably at the mere idea of having to swallow such a monster, but guessed that compared with a migraine it was still preferable. 

Ellie’s hands weakly reached out, reaching for the pill three times before she grabbed it between clumsy fingers, then fought to raise her head enough to swallow it. She went two shades paler almost instantly and swayed dangerously, so Alec reached out to steady her shoulder. 

“Shh, careful,” Alec murmured and held the cup to Ellie’s dry lips, helping her take a few sips to wash the medication down before she collapsed onto the sheets again. Her mouth moved as she tried to talk but no words were forming on her lips. 

“It’s alright, don’t speak. I’ll let you rest for a bit and check on the lads,” Alec whispered and saw Ellie blink once in confirmation. Only then did he leave, closing the door gently behind him. 

— 

“How’s Mum?” Tom stood from his spot on the couch and placed one of Fred’s toys down on the cushion as he approached Alec. 

“She took some medication and will try to sleep for a bit. I’ll check on her again later,” Alec replied as she stepped closer and almost instinctively ran his hand through Fred’s messy curls in comfort. The boy smiled and leant against the hand like an affectionate dog. 

“Mum will be better soon?” he asked and Alec nodded. 

“She will be. Just needs rest and lots of quiet and sleep. Her head’s hurting a lot and she feels a bit sick because of it, but she’ll be okay,” he explained gently. Fred nodded, but the frown creasing his forehead told Alec that he was not in the least satisfied with the answer. Alec thought for a moment. He was torn. On the one hand he knew Fred would need to be entertained, outdoors at best, to burn off some energy, but he did not want to leave Ellie all alone in the house either. The garden was out of the question. Ellie’s bedroom window faced towards it and the whole point of the exercise was to let Fred run wild. 

“I could take Fred down to the beach for a bit? Just an hour or so?” Tom suggested then. Alec nodded pensively but did not answer right away. He guessed that after the morning’s scare, Tom did not want to stay alone inside the house, but an old fear of Alec’s had reared its head inside his mind and he felt unsure if he could let Tom alone with his energetic little brother down by the water. 

“Don’t let him out of your sight. Stay at the top of the beach,” he cautioned, trying to speak in a calm and measured manner so as not to give away the dread he felt on the inside, but Tom seemed to guess nonetheless. 

“I won’t. We won’t get near the sea.  We can take a football and be back after an hour,” he shrugged and after taking another deep breath Alec nodded. 

“Aye, take your mobile, too and not longer than an hour. I’ll stay with your Mum and see if I can throw some lunch together,” Alec said and Tom grinned eagerly at the mention of food, a trait he usually shared with his mother. 

“Come on.” Fred, impatient as ever and having enough of the ongoing conversation, grabbed Tom’s hand and pulled him out into the hallway to get his shoes and jacket on while Alec followed at a slower pace. 

A few minutes later, after the door had just closed behind Tom and Fred, Alec heard a door slam upstairs. He looked up in alarm before climbing the stairs, taking two and three steps at a time. Ellie’s bedroom door was open and her bed empty, but the sounds coming from the bathroom told him unmistakable that she was being sick and he winced in sympathy. For a moment he stood outside, not quite sure if help was appreciated, then entered anyway. Ellie was slumped against the side of the bathtub, her face as white as the tiles around her with damp hair and clammy skin. She looked done in. 

Alec quickly filled the remaining cup with water and knelt beside her, offering the drink by holding it close to her lips. She managed a few sips, then pulled a face and closed her eyes again. 

“Brush m’teeth,” she mumbled and tried getting to her feet, but nearly stumbled. Putting the cup on the edge of the tub, Alec swiftly pulled her up and helped her to the sink before reaching for the one toothbrush that looked like it belonged to Ellie – as it had no dinosaurs on it and was placed orderly in its holder –put some toothpaste on it, and gave it to her. 

Brushing her teeth was a slow and messy ordeal, but it removed the vile taste from her mouth and once she had rinsed her face, Ellie felt at least marginally better in that regard. As for the rest, she still wanted to curl up on the bath rug and just be left there until the pain had passed. Her skull was throbbing madly, making her feel sick and dizzy as odd shapes distorted before even her closed eyelids. The crushing agony that felt like an iron band was put tightly around her head spread in waves throughout her whole body, down her spine and down right into the tips of her fingers and toes which tingled uncomfortably. 

Something warm and solid but also soft was holding her up, and she clung to it on instinct because it felt safe and familiar. After what felt like hours clumsily wading through a maze in total darkness, the world tilted on its axis and Ellie felt soft fabrics against her skin. Her bed, she registered somewhere at the edge of her consciousness and cracked an eye open to confirm. The red pattern on the white cotton of her sheets hurt her eyes, but it was easily recognisable and let her know she was still at home. 

“Try to sleep,” a low voice cooed and the warm and solid something Ellie had held onto moved away, causing her grip to tighten. She wanted to say something, but the words only came out as a whimper. 

“You want me to stay?” the voice sounded unsure and a little alarmed, but it hardly penetrated the fog of pain in her head. Ellie whimpered again, then relaxed when she felt another body settle in next to her on the bed. The mattress dipped slightly and she curled up against the source of warmth with her eyes closed. 

Alec swallowed as Ellie snuggled up against his side with her head tucked in beneath his chin and one hand still fisting part of his sweater. He really should not do this, but she seemed calmer and the boys were out anyway. 

“Half an hour,” he mumbled more to himself and pulled the duvet up over Ellie’s shoulders before reaching up and placing one hand at the back of her neck right where her skull met her spine. Slowly and carefully he began to rub the cramped muscles there, feeling them loosen under his touch as Ellie’s breathing evened out. He liked to think his massage helped. At any rate, it did not appear to make things worse. 

Half an hour later, almost on the dot, Alec carefully extricated himself out of Ellie’s grasp and carefully tucked the duvet around her to go back downstairs. She was sleeping for now and looked, if not better, than at least peaceful. He would not have minded staying for a bit as it had been almost cosy, sharing that space with her, but snuffed the thought as quickly as it crossed his mind. Ellie was sick and in need of care and he should not be thinking like that. Besides, the boys would return soon and they had better not find him sharing their mother’s bed. 

In the kitchen Alec first set about making some tea for himself before he took stock of Ellie’s fridge and pantry. As expected, his search did not turn up much in terms of a healthy and nourishing meal and for once he could not blame Ellie’s poor kitchen skills. They had had a long and tiring week and he himself had hardly more than bread and tea back at his house. A shopping trip was in order, especially if Ellie was incapacitated for more than one day. Alec strongly suspected she would be. 

He was still thinking about the logistics of how to keep an eye on Ellie, the boys and get some shopping done, when the door opened and Fred and Tom spilled back into the hall and the kitchen just a few minutes later. 

“You had fun?” he asked as Fred came in and plonked himself down on a chair, looking reasonably tired out. Tom, who had followed his brother, looked ready for a nap himself and Alec almost chuckled. Caring for a child Fred’s age was a tiring business. 

“Yes. I scored three goals against Tom.” Fred beamed and dangled his feet, peering at the kitchen counter behind Alec. “What’s for lunch?” 

Alec cast another futile gaze at the empty worktop. After a moment - and a slightly hopeful look from Tom - he reached for his wallet and pulled out a couple of notes. 

“Chippie?” he suggested, quickly shushing Fred who cheered a little bit too loudly at the suggestion. Tom only grinned, taking the money and nodding. 

“Yeah. Three?” he asked and after a moment Alec nodded. He needed to eat as well and fish and chips was as good as anything. 

“How’s mum?” Tom wanted to know before going out again. Alec smiled. 

“Better. Sleeping for now, but a migraine takes a while to wear off. She’ll feel shit for a few more days, I reckon. Tess, um, my ex-wife, always did.” 

“I thought it’s just a bad headache?” Tom queried, chewing his bottom lip between his teeth and looking a lot younger than his fifteen years. 

“Nah. It’s…a migraine’s a lot worse. It’s not just pain. It makes you sick, dizzy. Some people experience troubles with their speech or have slight hallucinations, almost. They see weird shapes or flashes of light. That’s called a migraine with an aura. It takes time for the effects to wear off,” he said, then added. “Your mum has medication prescribed for it. That’ll help and I expect the worst will be over by tomorrow. She’ll be fine.” Alec placed a hand on Tom’s shoulder and squeezed. 

“Right. I’ll go and get some food. Thanks, Alec.” He was out the door soon afterwards and returned not fifteen minutes later, bringing the smell of fried food back into the house. For once it made even Alec’s mouth water as his last meal had been a while ago and the week had hardly been overly nutritious. One bad habit he still could not shake during a tough case was always disregarding his need for food. 

They ate in relative silence, trying to keep quiet and listening to any sounds from upstairs. Tom and Fred were good boys, both trying to do their best to accommodate Ellie’s needs for silence and being on their best behaviour. Alec made a note to tell them so later. 

“There’s not much in the house in terms of food, so you should think of making a list of what we need. I’m not sure how we go about it yet. I don’t want to leave you alone or your Mum,” Alec said softly as he cleared away the remnants of their dinner. Tom nodded. 

“We could phone Beth?” he suggested. “Or maybe Maggie. She’s been doing some community work lately to connect some more. Says she’s hearing the best stories that way.” Tom shrugged. 

“I’m not sure your mum’s migraine warrants ‘community service’, but it’s a thought. You should think of what you need for the next couple of days. Easy but healthy meals,” Alec said pensively, ignoring Tom’s eye roll. As far as he knew the aversion to anything healthy and especially green was genetic in the Miller household. 

It turned out making a list of groceries to feed a house full of Millers was indeed a full day’s work and Alec had to intervene quite a few times with what both Tom and Fred deemed acceptable for mealtimes. In the end they had made a rather long list, but it at least included a few ingredients on the healthier side. Hopefully there was something among it that might entice Ellie to eat a little as well. She would feel better if she did. Deciding that the list was too long to burden either Beth or Maggie with it, Alec decided to check on Ellie and see if he could leave her in Tom’s care for a bit while taking Fred along with him to get to the supermarket. It would kill two birds with one stone: get the fridge restocked and keep Ellie’s littlest  entertained. It would also make the little one feel useful, which was always a bonus with small children. 

“Come in.” The voice still sounded hoarse and raspy, but the words were no longer slurred and though Ellie kept her eyes closed, she had stretched out a little more in her bed and was no longer curled up in the foetal position. 

“Just wanted to check on you and see if it’s alright to leave you alone for a bit and get some shopping in. Tom’ll be home and I’ll take wee Fred along,” Alec whispered as he sat at the edge of the bed. After a long moment, probably the time her overworked brain needed to comprehend what he had just said, Ellie nodded. 

“Fine.” 

“Anything you want? Juice? Tea?” Alec suggested gently, thinking that if Ellie did not feel up to eating anything later, it would still be good to keep her fluid and electrolyte levels up. He had done some google research earlier and learnt that magnesium especially was supposed to have a positive impact on migraines. Ellie shook her head after another short pause and Alec for once did not nag. He would pick something up anyway. Maybe some fruit juices, green or feverfew tea, so there was a choice in the house. Anything Ellie did not like at all she could bring with her to the office kitchenette, where anything edible was devoured by their colleagues like hungry swarms of locusts. 

“Alright. Rest up. We’ll be back in an hour tops. Tom’s downstairs,” Alec repeated the key information again and stood up to leave. Outside the bedroom door Fred was hovering on the landing, not quite brave enough to go inside his mum’s room but also too worried to remain in the living room with his brother. 

“Your mum’s feeling a bit better already,” Alec told him with an encouraging smile as he took Fred’s hand. “Come on, let’s leave her to rest for a bit more while we get some shopping done. You can help me, aye?” Fred nodded enthusiastically. 

The trip to the big Asda on the edge of town with a small child in tow and an almost foot-long list of groceries turned out to be much easier than Alec had anticipated. Fred was extremely helpful, suggesting foods his mum liked and getting whatever Alec told him to without much of a fuss, causing an elderly lady at the store to compliment him on what a lovely son he had. Not knowing how to take the praise or how to explain, Alec quickly steered Fred, who came bounding back at that moment with a bunch of bananas in his arms, into the next aisle to avoid giving any reply. 

They returned to the Miller house laden with shopping bags that Alec took his time to put away in the various cupboards and the fridge with Tom’s help. Fred, tired out from helping so much already, was stretched out on the couch, watching a cartoon with the volume low enough he would not disturb Ellie upstairs. 

“Thanks,” Tom mumbled once they were done, wringing his hands and awkwardly looking anywhere but straight at Alec. “For your help and…everything, I mean.” 

“It’s fine, lad. I’m always here for you and your mum. You can call me anytime,” he replied and Tom nodded, though he did not say much more and quickly left the kitchen before conversation could become any more personal. Happy to give Tom some space and noticing the time, Alec decided to stay in the kitchen for a while longer and get started on dinner. He doubted Ellie would want anything, but he could prepare enough to have some leftovers for the next day when she would hopefully feel better. 

Dinner became an easy but filling curry with chickpeas, spinach and sweet potato, plus white rice. There was also enough to last Ellie and her boys on Sunday evening in case she did not feel up to cooking, which Alec put in the fridge while Tom volunteered to help Fred get ready for bed. With the house slowly settling and evening descending outside, Alec felt a little out of place. He had spent the whole day at the Miller house and no one had batted an eyelash about his presence, but with night time approaching it was beginning to feel as if he was intruding. Ellie was still indisposed, though she had had some tea earlier and had definitely improved over the course of the afternoon. At any rate, it made Alec unsure what he should do. Should he stay for a bit longer? Leave? What was the correct thing to do? It was one of these times he wished social situations came with a handbook and clear instructions. 

Still lost in his thoughts and the internal struggle of them Alec did not notice Tom reappear in the doorway, looking just as unsure as Alec felt. 

“Um… Fred asked if you could say good night to him and read him a story? Mum usually does it, but…” Tom shrugged. 

For a moment Alec felt blindsided by the question. He was a frequent guest at the Miller house  but even if he stayed past Fred’s bedtime the only thing he had ever experienced was a sleepy ‘good night Uncle Alec’ directed at him from a sleepy Fred wearing dinosaur pyjamas standing at the bottom of the stairs. Bedtime stories were parental duties and Alec would not want to rob Ellie of any time with her children, seeing as there often was not enough of it anyway. 

“Mum said it’s alright,” Tom added as if sensing his struggles and Alec looked up. “She said she can’t read or talk for long. I took Fred to her to say good night and see how she is,” he added as explanation. 

“Aye, if it’s alright and Fred asked for it, I guess I can do it. I’ll be up in a minute, aye?” Alec said and exhaled when Tom left again to deliver the news. He wiped the already spotless counter a second time as he took a moment to prepare himself for the unfamiliar task of sharing in a bedtime ritual again. Daisy’s bedtime routine had been sparse and usually done by Tess, especially after he got promoted to DI, though when he could be home for bedtime, Alec had cherished those precious moments. 

He made his way upstairs and into Fred’s room where the boy was already sitting in his bed with a book in his lap. Tom got up when Alec entered. 

“I’m just gonna be in my room. Play some games maybe, alright?” he asked and Alec recognised the need for permission and reassurance. He smiled. 

“Aye. Keep the volume low and don’t stay up too late, yeah?” he asked and Tom nodded. 

“Will you stay for a bit longer? Fred sometimes wakes in the night and…I don’t know. It’s…kinda nice knowing you’re around,” Tom mumbled, his voice getting so low towards the end Alec had to strain his ears to catch the words. Again, Tom’s words caught him off guard. He had not thought about what to do yet and again wished for some kind of guidebook, but if Tom wanted him to, he could stay for a while. There was only an empty house waiting for him anyway. 

“I can, yeah,” he conceded and Tom retreated while Alec settled down to read Fred his story. The little lad had already scooted down in bed, lying all snuggled up beneath his duvet with a plushie clutched tightly in his hands, ready to listen. 

After Fred was asleep and Tom had hidden himself away in his room, Alec went downstairs again and found himself standing in an already spotless kitchen, debating what to do. Deciding a cup of tea was never wrong, he made himself a cuppa and returned to the living room with the steaming mug, turning on the tv at a low volume and watching some kind of show about a group of people completing a challenge to make some kind of ceramic. He had not been watching for a long time, barely enough to wonder how long exactly Tom’s ‘a bit longer’ was, when he heard footsteps on the stairs. At first he thought it was Fred, having woken again, but when he looked up he saw Ellie shuffling down the stairs in a pair of comfy sweatpants and a baggy sweatshirt. 

Alec quickly turned off the tv, not wanting to worsen her migraine again and looked at her. 

“You alright?” he asked, almost getting up when Ellie joined him on the sofa. She still looked a little wobbly on her feet and pale, but much improved compared to when he had arrived  at her house that late morning. “There’s food in the fridge, if you want. Made a quick curry,” Alec added and Ellie gave a small smile but shook her head. 

“I’m good, just can’t sleep anymore. Slept all bloody day.” she sank a little further into the cushions as both lapsed into silence. 

“Thank you,” Ellie mumbled after a moment and Alec turned his head. “For being here. For taking care of the boys. For everything. Dinner.” 

Alec smiled. “Sure. You were sick. They were worried.” 

He said it as if it was nothing and Ellie blinked a few times as a sudden and unprecedented wave of affection for her grumpy partner crashed over her and left her vision a little blurry. She angled her body a little more towards Alec on the sofa and rested her head on the backrest while he shot her a quizzical look. 

“Sure ye don’t need anything? How’s the head?” 

“I’m good. Head still hurts but it’s bearable, don’t see flashing lights anymore. Bored, to be honest. It’s why I got up.” Ellie shrugged. She pulled her legs up onto the sofa with her, her strength waning again already and suppressed a yawn.

“So, what ye wanna do?” Alec asked as he looked at her curled up as if for a film night, knowing that was definitely out of the question. Ellie bit her lip. Through the open door of her room she had heard him with Fred and it had made her feel so calm and grounded, knowing she was not alone in the house and did not need to worry about her boys because they were both in safe hands. 

“Would you read to me?” Ellie mumbled, her face flushing a little at the suggestion. Alec’s eyebrows shot up at her request, but other than that he hid his surprise well. 

“Ye got a book?” he simply asked. 

“On my bedside table,” Ellie said and Alec nodded, then got up to retrieve it without protest. He came back down again carrying two books and Ellie’s ears went red as she spotted one of them. She had forgotten about that one. It had a dark green cover adorned with thistle illustrations and a couple’s golden silhouette at the bottom. 

“That’s what ye want me to read?” Alec asked in a voice that swayed between mortification and disbelief, making Ellie’s flush spread further down her neck. 

“No,” she quickly said, gesturing helplessly to the other paperback in his hands. It was a crime novel she had started a few weeks ago, then had had no time to pick up again when their latest case provided enough riddles to last well after bedtime. 

“Thank God. I’m not reading that shite,” Alec mumbled as he sat down on the couch again and tossed the copy of ‘Outlander’ onto her coffee table well out of reach only to receive a nudge against his ribs. “Why are ye reading that?” 

“I’m a single woman without a social life. I have a stressful job and a boss who can be a knob on his worst days. Sometimes I crave a something a little bit easy and harmless, some petty conflict that’s as far away from reality as possible. And I like to read about romance once in a while if there’s none in my life,” Ellie replied matter-of-factly. Alec nodded, quickly becoming serious again as the words hit home. He flicked on a small lamp by the couch, picked up the other book and flicked to the marked page. 

“Sorry,” he mumbled in a low, but earnest voice. “For being a knob sometimes.” His clarification made a smile tug at the corners of Ellie’s mouth. 

“Ye can…um, ye can lie down, if ye want,” Alec added after another beat of silence, his eyes already focused on the page with more concentration than necessary. For a moment Ellie hesitated, then, deciding to be brave and remembering the way Alec had held her earlier, she moved closer and eventually placed her head on his thigh. She could feel his muscles stiffen for a moment, then he exhaled and relaxed, allowing her to loosen up as well. 

Alec cleared his throat, then began to read in that low, rumbling voice of his. Ellie closed her eyes. His accent, a familiar and comforting sound, washed over her without many of the words registering but it felt soothing to just listen, the warmth of his leg seeping into her body and the feeling of his calm breaths in sync with her own inhales. She moved her head to get more comfortable, snuggling a little closer to him. 

“Alec?” she whispered and he paused. 

“Hm?” 

“You’re not a knob. Not really,” Ellie mumbled and closed her eyes. There was no reply, but a moment later she felt his hand coming to rest softly on her head, his fingers combing through a few of her strands absent-mindedly as he read. 

—