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Isabeau usually wakes up before Siffrin in the morning. And as such, sometimes has to witness craft spells being thrown around in a box by his restless, sleeping friend. The barrier Siffrin's recently learned to craft before going to sleep held up pretty nicely against the spells, crafted to match the user’s strength.
But that doesn't stop Isabeau's heart from hurting, having to watch Siffrin suffer like this. Part of him wished the barrier wasn’t see-through, but that’s a selfish thought, at least to him. He'd try to help them, but firstly, he already knew what would happen if he did. He subconsciously rubbed a hand on the forearm that one of Siffrin's spells managed to hit. Despite being healed and not scarring over, his brain remembered the pain. He said it wasn't that bad- and it wasn't! But Change, if it didn't still hurt. Even if it was Piercing Craft, it was still strong, though he found himself thankful that Siffrin didn’t use Paper. He'd do it again though, even if it hurts.
The second thing is the fact that the barrier physically prevents him from doing so. The best thing he can do is comfort Siffrin after their nightmare is over. Knowing Siffrin, while he’s admitted to not minding touch, he still isn’t used to it and might react harshly to being touched while he’s having a nightmare.
Hmm… their outburst is running a little long though. Maybe he should have asked Odile if sleep-crafting can still exhaust you. He's heard a little bit about sleep-crafting from the Defenders, although not enough to know the answer. He could guess it was still a yes though. It'd make sense.
He should probably at least try to do something. “Sif?” He called out, quiet enough that the others wouldn't come in but loud enough for Siffrin to hopefully hear. They didn't react. “Siffrin!” He tried again.
Seems they're too deep in their dream to hear him. This left Isabeau to his own thoughts, most of which were worried ones towards the rogue, so he tried to think of a more positive one instead.
Siffrin does seem a little less scared of himself since he learned to craft a barrier. At first, he was concerned his spells might break it, but after a few nights he was proven wrong, to his relief.
He wished he could say he slept peacefully after that, but Siffrin still had their nightmares to deal with so… definitely not. If it weren't for the sleep-crafting, he'd hug him to make sure he knew everything was okay. He knew Siffrin would want that too, but they still kept their distance when it came to sleep, which… hurts, but Isabeau understood. Maybe when they finally get medicine for it.
It hurt to know Siffrin was so scared of themself in the first place, and even more to know they deprived themself of sleep because of it! How they managed to hide it for an entire week, especially from him or Odile, was beyond him. He took it upon himself personally- even if Odile did tell him to- to make sure Siffrin actually gets some sleep, and comfort him through his nightmares if he needed it. He’s um… sure everyone else would do the same, but he was the one who usually shared tents with them.
He turned his focus back to the barrier. It was a little terrifying, watching craft spells hit the walls of the barrier with so much force. He was lucky nothing else happened to his arm. He knew he could probably live with it, but Siffrin?
Well, he already had a harsh reaction to hurting him, so he couldn't- didn't want to imagine anything worse. But at least Siffrin let him hug him for a bit that day after he got a bit of proper sleep, when he felt like he was safe to be around for once. He said it was to make it up to him for hurting him, but Siffrin themself probably needed that too.
He’s… never going to tell Siffrin that he thinks the strength of his spells are a little scary, at least until the rogue feels way better about himself than he does now. Cool, but scary.
It took him a bit to notice, but the craft spells slamming against the barrier eventually stopped. Siffrin was still asleep, but their thrashing seemed to have reduced to light tossing and turning and panicked breathing. It still didn’t help the ache in Isabeau’s heart seeing this.
…maybe he can try waking him up now?
“Sif!” He called out again. “Hey, Sif!”
It seemed a lot easier to wake them up this time around, as the rogue jolted awake, taking quick breaths with a look of fear in their eye. Before Isabeau could remind him to breathe slower, he quickly looked around the tent, as if taking in his current surroundings, then sighed a shaky breath of relief. He proceeded to take in quieter, slower breaths from there. The barrier disappeared.
A huff of relief escaped from Isabeau when Siffrin started taking deeper breaths. He was worried they might have a panic attack from… whatever they were dreaming about. He should probably ask him. Later, when he’s recovered.
“Morning Sif!” Isabeau greeted with a cheerful tone, trying to see if that would help the mood.
“M-morning Isa.” They greeted back, still catching their breath. They looked up at him, a tired smile on their face. They really don't look like they had a good rest (of course they didn't), but he still seems happy to see him, which lifted Isabeau’s heart a bit.
Well, the barrier is gone so…
Um… maybe he should wait until Siffrin can actually breathe again.
Once Siffrin finally regulated their breathing, they laid their head down in their arms. Isabeau moved closer to him.
“I'm… guessing you didn't sleep well.” Why is that what he led with?
Siffrin slowly shook their head. They seem less energetic and more groggy. As energetic as they usually were, anyway. Well, that's expected of someone who just woke up.
“Still tired.” They muttered. “Like… really tired. Like I didn't even sleep.”
“Are you going back to sleep then?”
They made a negative noise, accompanied by another headshake. “I don't want to.”
Fair enough.
“I'm not sure it's that kind of tired.” Siffrin continued. They rolled onto their side… and right into Isabeau. It took everything in him to not make an embarrassing sound, although his cheeks felt warm. “It's more like… hmm…” He looked at one of his hands thoughtfully, then up at Isabeau. “Isa, how much Craft did I use while I was sleeping?
“Not sure, you were already lashing out when I woke up. You seemed to be using a lot though. Why?”
Siffrin let the hand lay limp on the ground, content with just leaning against Isabeau. “My hands feel like they're going to go numb and I feel like I ran a marathon. I-I mean, I guess I kinda… did.” Uh, what does he mean by that- “Kind of… feel cold too.”
Huh. He could think of why they do feel cold.
It seemed like Siffrin was going to further lean on Isabeau after making that comment, but he suddenly perked up a little in alarm, pulling away slightly. “Um… I’m not getting sick again, am I?”
Isabeau put a hand to Siffrin’s forehead. It didn’t feel like they were burning up. “Nope, no fever! You’re a little cold, yeah, but otherwise you feel fine.” He said as he pulled it away.
Siffrin gave a sigh of relief, his body relaxing, and went back to leaning on Isabeau. “Good. I really hope this sleep-crafting thing doesn’t mean I might get sick easier or something…”
Isabeau thought back to what he knew about it. He’s not sure. “I don’t think so? It probably won’t be on the same level as back in the House, if that’s what you’re worried about. Unless you happen to use an immense amount of Craft for a long period of time again, hahaha…”
As if Isabeau perfectly read his mind, Siffrin nodded. That was an understandable thing to worry about. A fever like that probably felt awful, given he couldn’t walk well without him and Bonnie supporting them, and even their returning fever in the clocktower seemed bad. To be fair, the second time, they weren’t supposed to be using Craft for a bit, and their body forced them to do exactly that.
“If anything, this is probably just regular Craft exhaustion. I’m no doctor though, so take that with a grain of salt.” He chuckled.
Siffrin let out a quiet laugh as well. “Well, do you know anything about sleep-crafting?”
“Probably not anymore than what Odile told you.” Isabeau shrugged. “I guess sleep-crafting can lead to you feeling more exhausted in the morning if you use a lot.”
Siffrin huffed. “Sucks. What about feeling cold though? The last time I felt cold after sleep-crafting was when I was sick…”
“I really don’t think you have a fever this time, Sif. But like I said, I’m not a doctor. I’m just guessing from my own experience with Craft exhaustion.” He tapped a finger on his arm in thought. “I guess you could think of it like… if Craft was a campfire, and the fire slowly goes out overtime without more fuel.” Or at least that’s what he thinks it feels like. He can only recall this happening to him once when he trained a bit too hard, but he felt like this was a good descriptor.
The traveler let out a thoughtful hum, less anxious about the possibility of getting sick again. “Makes sense.” They nodded. “So if Craft was a fire, shouldn’t it be called Craft burnout then?”
Even when he was tired, Siffrin still smirked when he made that joke. Isabeau couldn’t help but laugh loudly. “No! That’s a completely different thing, Sif!”
Maybe Siffrin already knew that? Or he didn’t. Either way they laughed too.
The two were quiet for a bit when the laughter settled down, before Isabeau sighed. “I…I just wish I could help you more. Take all the nightmares away or something!
“Isa…”
“At least then you wouldn’t have to suffer! Seriously, reliving all that stuff can’t be good for you…” He knows Siffrin hasn’t talked about the full extent of the loops. But whenever they lash out like that, he just wishes he could take away their pain.
“Isa.” Siffrin said more firmly. He turned to look at them. “It’s okay. You’re doing fine, just being here and talking is enough for me.”
He paused for a bit. For a good bit, actually. He was sure his cheeks were dark now with how warm he was, and he tried to hold back a squeak that ended up coming out as more of a voice crack when he said, “Aw, Sif! Thanks Sif!”
And now Siffrin's cheeks were dark too. They smiled.
They stayed there in the quiet for a bit, listening to the sounds of nature and the others outside. He's not sure what they're doing now, but Bonnie was probably cooking at this point. Whose turn was it to help them again? … probably not his, and they kind of decided to keep Siffrin from the cooking supplies for a bit since their spice mix up.
Well, he hopes it's not his turn yet, he's got a question he should probably ask Siffrin! Which he definitely didn't forget because Siffrin’s praise fried his brain, and he only just remembered now!
“So, what did you mean by running a marathon?” Isabeau asked.
They gave a groggy, confused ‘huh?’ as they looked up at him, and thought for a minute before remembering. “Oh. Um… just… my dream.” They looked back down out of embarrassment. “Stars, did I really say it like that?”
“Uh… yeah. Were you… running from something?”
Siffrin shook his head. “No, I was lost in the house again. Fighting a lot of sadnesses. There were so many…” He shrunk in on himself at the memory. “A lot more than there actually were but…” He chuckled. “Dreams do tend to exaggerate, don’t they?”
Isabeau wanted to shrug at how dreams work, but he couldn’t bring himself to. He’d rather just hug Siffrin instead. Still, he said, “Dreams are weird like that, yeah.”
“Anyway, probably my fault for not fighting some of them since I thought it was a waste of time. I was too focused on just getting out. But… I couldn’t. There was no way out. I think I ran into a tear near the end?”
Oh, yikes. Isabeau finally got the courage to ask, “I-is it okay if I…” He trailed off, opening an arm in an offer of a hug. He would just hug him, since Siffrin was already touching him, but figured he should ask first. A hug might be too much.
Siffrin looked up at him and nodded. Isabeau wrapped a comforting arm around the rogue, laying down next to him. “Well, you’re here now. You’re not in the House anymore. There’s no life-ending tears, and you’re definitely not looping anymore.”
Siffrin nodded, appreciating the reassurance and leaning further into the hug. For someone who was so scared of even doing so in fear of harming him just days ago, they sure didn’t seem to mind this morning. Not that Isabeau himself minded. Like he told himself earlier, Siffrin was slowly becoming less scared of himself, and less scared of harming everyone around him. Which was a good thing! No one should be afraid of themself!
But… something in him wanted to make sure Siffrin knew that. “Hey, Sif?” Isabeau found himself saying.
“Yeah?”
“You know… if you ever feel scared because of the sleep-crafting, you can talk to us right?” He wanted to be there for him, no matter what, and he was sure everyone else felt the same. “No more trying to avoid it until you almost literally drop, alright?” He thought back to when Siffrin fell in the river because of how tired they were. They were lucky it wasn’t a deeper, faster running river, now that he thought about it.
“I'll… I'll try my best.” They gave him a tired smile, but it wasn’t really enough.
Isabeau shook his head. “No no, you have to promise me.” He said seriously.
“Okay fiiiine, I promise.” They groaned, although the wider smile does say that they meant it.
Isabeau smiled a bit. “And do you super promise?”
Siffrin squinted at him but couldn’t help but laugh. “Yes, I super promise.”
That was good enough for him.
They shifted a bit, laying their head down in their arms again. They seem so tired… “Bleh, I just w-… um…” Siffrin froze, suddenly aware of what he was about to say, before he shook his head. Isabeau wondered about that for a bit, until they continued, “I just want to not feel so…” They trailed off, trying to think of the word.
“Worn out?” Isabeau guessed.
“Drained.” Siffrin tiredly corrected. “Drained is more like how I'm feeling.” They sighed. “And it's only the morning. And I just woke up.”
“You know, a bit of Bonbon’s cooking might help.”
Siffrin chuckled. “Yeah. But I don't wanna get up.”
Isabeau raised an eyebrow, amused. “So you don't want to go back to sleep, but you don't want to get up either?”
“Nope.”
“So what are you going to do then?”
“Nothing. I think I’m just going to lay here forever.”
Isabeau decided to play along at this point. “Aw, but then you can’t travel if you do that.”
“... yeah, you’re right…” They sighed. “And I’m really hungry.”
Isabeau chuckled, sitting up and releasing Siffrin from the hug (which the rogue let out a quiet, adorable ‘noooo’ in response to). “Want me to help you up then?”
Siffrin seemed to debate on this for a long time. Was he actually considering just laying there instead of eating?
But eventually, they realized they really did need to get up at some point. They groaned, trying to force themself to sit up, and managed to, despite the struggle. Guess that’s a no to his question.
“Now can you actually stand up?” Isabeau asked, noticing their struggle to even sit up. He stood up first, ready to offer Siffrin a hand if he needed it
“I think I just laid down for too long, Isa, I'll be fine.” Siffrin moved to stand up as they spoke. They were a little slow, their legs shook a bit, but Isabeau thought they managed until they stumbled.
He quickly rushed to their side, keeping them from falling. Siffrin gave him a thankful smile before righting himself.
They slouched a bit, exhaustion still in his eye. Yeah, he definitely should get them something to eat.
“Ready?”
Siffrin nodded.