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Caine had prepped them for it, but when they arrived in the dormitory's hallway, it was still jarring to see. A big chunk of the hallway, missing. Much like when Caine was deleted in the months prior, the void could be seen beyond the jagged polygons that made up the floor and wall. The chunk was just small enough that they could sidle around it and continue down the hall, and big enough to completely banish one room and one room alone— Ragatha's. Of course. Everyone else's room remained untouched, fortunately. But of course Ragatha's is missing, lost somewhere to the void.
"Don't fret, my sunny little stars!" Caine declares, "I'll have that fixed!"
Ragatha and the rest of the circus crew glance up at him floating high above them, waiting for him to go on.
"...Eventually!" Caine finally caves to the pressure. "I-I'm not really sure what happened but, uh, I'll have to do some... finagling since my powers aren't as powerful anymore..."
"That's fine," Pomni suddenly chips in brightly, "Ragatha can stay with me in the meantime." Without any hesitation she throws her arm around the ragdoll's waist, pulling her close, glancing up at her with a dopey grin.
Oh, god.
Ragatha spent plenty of time with Pomni these days. She shouldn't feel so anxious. The two were close— very close! Their relationship had gone from awkward coworkers stuck in purgatory together to a friendship holding within it a deep wellspring of sincerity and tenderness. This mutual agreement they'd fallen into, something so soft and sweet, something they both could trust one another to hold and cherish, had been carefully cultivated ever since the jester finally began to acclimate to her life here in the circus— and the ragdoll had been delighted by each new milestone in its development. She shouldn't be so anxious. She cares about Pomni, she loves Pomni, she trusts Pomni. And, in the week prior, she had managed to scrape up the courage to march into the common area where all of her beloved friends sat, to show that her faith in them was well placed, to be honest with them as she could be. She stood proud, she stood firm, and she divulged to them her grand revelation— she's a lesbian!
The left side of the room, where one of Zooble’s spindly arms was draped over Gangle on the couch, and Kinger was settled into the armchair nearby, didn't seem to share the same shocked expression as the right side of the room— which was comprised of one lone Pomni. Regardless, they all encouraged her, congratulated her, and comforted her— reassuring that she's still the same old Ragatha, and that she is still very well loved. Ragatha quietly mulled over their reactions once she had settled down on the couch next to Pomni, her jitters and tears now subsided, her hand naturally set in the jester's. Her friends didn't appear to be as surprised with her new lore as she had initially anticipated. It was as if they all knew... save for Pomni, of course. The jester looked as if she'd just been told she'd won the lottery, but that emotion was lost on the ragdoll, considering her nerves in the moment. The only thing she could register were the jester's impossibly wide eyes and the dopey "o" of her mouth. That, to Ragatha, just looked like surprise and nothing more. That's typical— of course everyone would suspect her except for Pomni.
Ragatha didn't just love Pomni, she was in love with Pomni. She had been for quite some time, perhaps even before realizing that she was. She adored her, every rubbery bit of her. The ragdoll had somehow managed this dance with her jester to the point where they were hugging and holding hands openly in front of the others. They were touchy feely, smiley giggly, and somehow still unaware of how close they appeared. From the outside one would assume they were in the midst of a budding romance with how sickly sweet the two with one another. But, no, they weren't— Ragatha's anxiety, seemingly bursting from her seams, just wouldn’t allow her to ask Pomni for something more than friends. They were just... friends. Best friends! Her best friend, who she loves. Yup.
Pomni, god bless her, is oblivious to this internal turmoil that the ragdoll is tussling with. She loves the ragdoll unabashedly with her whole rubber chest. And now that Ragatha has displayed this big, neon sign that Pomni, dear little Pomni, had a chance to be with her? Oh, it was over. Pomni, ever impulsive, had been making strides all week to further pull them into those deep, uncharted waters— and Ragatha was well aware. But she hesitates. She can't seem to overcome that fear that lies deep within her stuffing filled gut. She wants desperately to take the plunge with the jester, to love her without hesitation.
But she’s scared. She’s scared she’ll be too much. She scared she’ll push her away. She scared she’ll ruin what they already have. She can’t. She won’t. Why go any further when you have so much already? She should be happy. She should be grateful. She's just being selfish. Those words spit like venom in the back of her cotton filled head. They're from a voice that isn't her own, a voice she's relieved she'll never have to hear out loud again. In her head is another story, though. And so, she continues the dance— holding the jester’s hand and spinning her, enjoying her at arm's length, even if their "arm's length" is a lot closer these days. But, oh, how she longs for more. Oh, how she wants to dip the jester to the floor, to pull her close during the slow dance, to lean down and kiss her at the end of the set. Ugh.
Before she knows it, their adventure for the day is over, and they've returned to the tent. Zooble and Gangle mind the void in the hall before they slip into mix 'n match toy's room. The two haven't been shy about their relationship these days— Ragatha knew firsthand. Kinger bids the remaining circus crew goodnight, muttering something about needing to count his eggs before retiring for the evening. Now the only two left, Pomni glances excitedly up at Ragatha.
"So, you wanna...?" The little jester bounces on the balls of her feet, eyes flicking back and forth between her door and the ragdoll.
Ragatha winces, but she smiles and nods regardless. She can do this. They're friends. They're just sleeping in the same room, it's no big deal.
Pomni pops into her room first, changing into something more comfortable, then politely steps back out, holding the door for her beloved ragdoll to go and do the same. Ragatha had conjured a new set of pajamas in lieu of her now deleted wardrobe— a baby blue nightdress with a cute, floral embroidery on the hem of her collar and sleeves. Pomni, of course, is rocking an oversized t-shirt and shorts. The print on the tee has an image of Caine, arm outstretched, holding a basket of chicken fingers. The text over him reads "Raising Caine's." When Ragatha finishes changing and opens the door for the jester, she saunters in, heading straight for the bed.
"I’m beat!" Pomni flops down on the mattress, while Ragatha remains huddled over by the door, trying to take up as little space as digitally possible. "Who knew corralling shrimp could be so exhausting," she continues, but Ragatha doesn't reply.
Pomni's bed fits her pint size perfectly; a nice little four-poster twin bed outfitted with a silky comforter on top. As much as Ragatha would love to dive into it and the jester's embrace, it just feels like... she's intruding. She's too much, she's too much, she's too—
"I’ll take the floor, then, if that’s okay," she suddenly blurts, trying to take herself out of her own head, "do you have an extra blanket and pillow I could borrow, Pomni...?" The ragdoll searches around the room as if she's looking for something to do, something to distract her tangled thoughts.
"What?" The jester jolts up on an elbow, "No, you’re sleeping in the bed," she scooches from the middle of said bed to the side closest to the wall, gesturing to the empty spot next to her.
"It’s, uh... a little small for two, don’t you think? I don’t wanna bother you—"
"Ragatha. I was sitting in your lap when we were riding that giant shrimp earlier," Pomni raises an eyebrow at her, "you don’t bother me."
The ragdoll’s eye stays trained on the jester, searching, but she doesn’t speak. Pomni decides she needs further encouragement.
"I like being close to you. You know that, right?" The jester reminds her, offering a tender smile.
Ragatha stiffens, her grip on her nightdress tight. She knows, but she can’t help but feel that twinge of fear.
"Now, come on," Pomni tries to coax her by gently patting the empty space, "I promise I won’t bite."
Ragatha feels her candy heart skip a beat before she takes a hesitant step forward. Building off of that momentum, she’s soon falling into the space next to the jester, jostling her with the flop.
"Attagirl!" Pomni chuckles, patting the ragdoll’s back.
Ragatha's cotton insides flip.
“I’m sorry for taking up so much space,” she mumbles into the pillow, trying to hide the red stitched across her face.
"You’re not, Ragatha. It's nice having you here," Pomni keeps her hand firmly planted on the ragdoll’s back, now rubbing circles, "can’t remember the last time I had a sleepover..."
Ragahta finally turns her head, her one eye peeking out from her hiding spot.
"I’ve never been to a sleepover," the ragdoll mumbles out of the corner of her mouth, "Mama always said I shouldn’t be doing silly kid stuff like that. I had to focus on more important things..." She trails off, eye downcast.
"Well, she’s not here, so," Pomni flops down next to her, "we can do whatever you want. I’ll show you all the sleepover essentials— we’ll play games, eat junk food, talk about girls..." The jester wiggles her eyebrow at that last part.
"Pomni," the ragdoll chuckles softly as she readjusts, turning onto her side to face the jester, "you just said you were tired."
"Are there any girls that you like right now...?" Pomni continues as if she didn’t hear the her, her tone teasing, but underneath there's a hint of curiosity that Ragatha catches.
Ragatha can’t stop the grin tugging at her lip— something bold bubbling up in her.
"I dunno," the ragdoll drawls, "can you keep a secret...?" She flutters her eyelashes at the jester.
Pomni's pale face suddenly blooms with color, her grin wide, before she nods a bit too eagerly. Ragatha pauses, her own smirk growing, all the while Pomni leans in with bated breath.
"Evil Pomni is kinda cute..." Ragatha finally mutters, putting her finger to her felt lip.
The jester balks.
"No," she can’t help but laugh, unbelieving, "no don’t say that!" She makes a grab for the ragdoll’s soft shoulders, shaking her lightly. "She sucks!" She cackles, and Ragatha, tickled by her reaction, joins in.
The room lightens with laughter, Ragatha feels a little more at ease. They're friends. They're just sleeping in the same room, it's no big deal.
"I think she’s just... misunderstood," the ragdoll manages as their fit of laughter finally dies out.
There’s a beat.
"...You don’t really mean that though, right?" The jester whispers, her brow suddenly furrowed.
Ragatha tilts her head, not sure what to make of the question.
"That you like her...?" She adds, more desperate.
Ragatha’s eye crinkles in a smile. She can't help it when she sees that pitiful, but very much endearing in her opinion, look on the jester's face— the same as the sign on her bedroom door.
"No, Pomni—" she tries her best to suppress her smile and the giggles bubbling out of her for the sake of the jester's ego, "not like that."
Pomni dramatically sighs the breath she’d been holding, and Ragatha's unable to resist the laughter that bursts out of her. At some point the two had closed the already small gap between them, their hands finding each other as they always do, and somewhere far beneath the covers their legs occasionally ghosting one another.
"Okay, no more sleepover crap— let’s just go to bed like adults, I guess,” the jester pulls away, pouting, before she folds her arms across her chest to reinforce her point. It's clear from the smirk on her rubber lip that she's relieved to hear Ragatha's answer, though.
Ragatha offers her a sly smile, "Sorry for teasing you."
"You’d better be..." Pomni tries to growl, but again her smirk gives her away, "I’ll get you back for that..."
"Oh, yeah? What are you gonna do about it?" Another bout of impulsive confidence. Maybe Pomni's rubbing off on her.
Oh, that was a bad idea. An evil, tight-lipped smile creeps onto the jester’s face.
"Maybe I will bite," her teeth are suddenly razor sharp when she grins.
Ragatha flushes before she shoves a hand in the jester’s face, creating distance between them again.
"Hey!" Pomni’s laughs are muffled by the mitt over her face.
"I-if you bite me I will go sleep on the couch!" Ragatha’s giggles become choppy thanks to the tussle the two were now having.
"Don’t go!" The jester whines through her plush prison, "I’ll bite you if you do—!"
The comforter is flung from the two as they wrestle for the upper hand, Ragatha clearly winning. Pomni’s hands paw at the fabric of her arm but can’t manage to pry her loose, while Ragatha uses her other hand and legs to pin the jester against the wall. The jester squirms helplessly for purchase before she finally gives in, her arms and legs going limp. They stay in this position for a few more moments, trying to recover from the struggle, until Ragatha hears Pomni mutter something unintelligible from behind her mitt. She carefully pulls her hand from the jester’s face— making sure to keep her pinned— revealing her disgruntled expression. Pomni open her sharp toothed mouth.
"Don’t bite," Ragatha puffs through her wide grin, "you promised."
She promptly shuts her mouth.
"Okay, okay," when she smiles, her teeth look like they’ve returned to their usual shape, "I did promise..."
With a labored chuckle, Ragatha drops her limbs, Pomni falling back into the mattress along with them. The two lie there, smiling, the only sound in the room being the two trying to catch their breath from the scuffle. Pomni glances down at the space between them, eyes searching. After another beat, the jester takes a deep breath that she doesn't need.
"Can I...?" She glances at the space before her eyes come back to meet Ragatha.
Ragatha’s smile brightens, and without a word she nods. Pomni takes her cue, cautiously shuffling her way over and closing the gap once more, pawing for the discarded comforter before she pulls it back over them.
"I know you probably shouldn't trust me now," the jester mumbles, her gaze lowered, "but, uh, do you maybe wanna...?" Her voice trails off as she slowly opens her arms, chancing a look at the ragdoll. A wordless question, one that steals the ragdoll’s still unsteady breath.
Once more, without a word, she nods. Pomni takes her cue, and the two scooch closer, arms gingerly wrapping around one another. Their breath now a little more even, they both sigh into each other. Their legs intertwine, and Pomni’s head finds her place against the ragdoll’s chest. They're friends. They're just sleeping in the same room, it's no big deal.
"You’re... not too warm...?" Ragatha whispers, her own face hot.
"No, you’re perfect," Pomni mumbles into the ragdoll’s chest. Ragatha’s face feels like it’s been set ablaze. The jester goes on, "you’re like one of those plushies you warm up in the microwave. It’s makin' me sleepy..."
Ragatha, despite herself, grins. One of her hands rubbing comfortingly up and down the jester’s back. She can’t believe it. She's wrapped up in the arms of the person she loves most— the feeling of being too much long forgotten. Instead she feels so warm. So fuzzy. She must be dreaming. Well, she will be soon— she can feel herself... drifting...
"Can I be honest with you...?" Pomni suddenly asks, sleep gone from her voice.
It startles Ragatha awake, but she takes a moment to breathe, tamping down her anxiety. She pulls away from her place on top of the jester's head to look her in the eye. "Always."
Pomni glances back, suddenly timid, "I’d like to... uh, I know this is kinda sudden, but," her eyes dart around her field of view— but there's nothing else for her to look at except for Ragatha, "I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately, and, uh, I was just wondering if— would you like to... go out together? Like, uh... on a date? You and me, maybe...?"
Ragatha's eye becomes impossibly wide. She doesn’t speak. She can’t. Her hair noodles are going to stick up any second now.
"N-not right now, I mean, uh, I, um—" Pomni backtracks, as if going out right now is the reason behind Ragatha's reaction.
Oh, she must be dreaming. She must have gone to sleep, and her digital mind is playing a cruel trick on her. She’s too much for this to be true. Too much work and effort to be loved, too much pain for her to share. She must be dreaming. She’s dreaming, she’s dreaming, she must be—
As if Pomni could hear her raging thoughts, her arms around the ragdoll tighten, steady and reassuring, grounding her. Pomni’s hold on her, a wordless answer that tells her that this is what Pomni wants. An answer that tells her she wants to love her, she wants to support her, she isn’t too much, she’s worth everything and more, she wants this, she wants her—
"Pomni," Ragatha finally breathes again, "I-I’d love to."
Pomni brightens. "That’s, uh, yeah," she chuckles, suddenly breathless again, and Ragatha joins in. "I'm... thank you, Ragatha— for taking a chance on me," she glances away bashfully. Oh, how she made the ragdoll's heart twist. She felt like the jester had it backwards. Before she could interject, the jester pipes up again, "I don’t think I’m gonna be able to sleep now..."
"Me neither," her fabric face hurt from all the smiling.
Ragatha takes the chance, pulling Pomni close again. Their embrace, as close as digitally possible, is a tight, excited thing— full of warmth and laughter and giddy anticipation. She isn’t dreaming. She isn’t dreaming. She isn’t dreaming.
After what could have been forever, Pomni pulls away, her eyes gleaming, "I’ll take you anywhere you want," the words tumble out of her a mile a minute, "we could go watch a softball game, go down to the fairgrounds or to the cafe— whatever you want."
The ragdoll chuckles softly, "I’m happy as long as I get to spend time with you," she combs her mitt over the jester's messy mop of hair before continuing, "I like being close to you too, you know."
Pomni’s eager expression softens, her eyes slowly wandering to the ragdoll’s felt lip. She pursed her own. She’d like to be closer.
"Um," she swallows, glancing back up, "do you maybe wanna...?" A shy smile creeps across her lip.
A wordless question, one that steals the ragdoll's breath. But she isn't scared. She's everything she feels when she's with Pomni— she warm, she's fuzzy, she's giggly, she's smiley, she's everything she's ever wanted to be. She isn't too much, she's just right. And Pomni wanted all of her. She took the lead in their dance, she took the plunge, hand reaching out for the ragdoll's and glancing at her sideways with a look that said "trust me," and so she did. She does. So now they'll go, to love without hesitation. Pomni must really be rubbing off off on her.
Finally, without a word, she nods. Pomni takes her cue, closing the distance. The jester prays to whatever digital god is listening that Caine can’t figure out how to fix Ragatha’s room anytime soon.