Archive of Our Own

Katsuki comes to in a tangle of black fabric about twelve sizes too big for him.

"Oh dear," an unfamiliar voice says.

Katsuki sneezes, pulling at the fabric to find an opening for escape.

His mother's hands suddenly lift the thing from his head, stroking over his pouting cheeks with her thumbs. They're at the studio. He doesn't remember coming here so she must have put him in the car while he was asleep.

"Why are you drowning me in clothes?" Katsuki asks. He's not even wearing a shirt! He crosses his arms over his stomach, trying to keep warm in the air conditioned warehouse.

"I keep spare clothes for Aki in my bag," the unfamiliar woman says to his mother, bowing slightly. "I'll go grab them. I'm so sorry."

"Don't worry about it," Mitsuki says easily. "It is bring your kids to work day. Accidents happen."

Oh, that must be why the hag dragged him along. But he doesn't remember any accident. Did someone…knock the clothes onto him? Did they steal his clothes? The right-sized ones?

"It was a quirk," Mitsuki says, smoothing her thumb over the deep crease in his forehead.

"Oh."

"You're in the future right now."

Katsuki blinks, looking around the room again and then at his mother. He squints. "You don't have wrinkles. Or a cane."

His mother tsk's. "Not that far into the future, brat."

Whatever. If it's not that far, Katsuki doesn't really care. What's so interesting about the studio?

Maybe if he can get ahold of her phone, he can look up All Might's newest fights though. That would be cool.

The woman returns and then leaves just as quickly. Katsuki's mother hands him his new clothes piece by piece, waiting patiently as he dresses himself. Everything is boring except for the shirt, which is red with a green dinosaur on the front.

"Alright," his mother says, hefting Katsuki into her arms. They step out from behind the changing screen and she nods to a worker with an earpiece around her head. "Talia, can you get this stuff into the locker room? Thanks."

Katsuki glances around at the big cameras and tall white backdrops. He leans over his mother's back and frowns when her phone isn't in her back pocket like normal. He idly kicks his feet around while she carries him someplace- probably to the refreshments area. That's where Katsuki usually hangs out when he's brought to the studio. There are always juice boxes and cookies and fruit slices, plus really big chairs that make Katsuki feel like a king sitting on his throne.

Sometimes, when the workers aren't so busy, Katsuki can even order them to throw goldfish into his open mouth, much to their mutual delight.

Katsuki's almost looking forward to being deposited there when he sees a Pro Hero and his head whips the other way, tugging at his mother's shirt.

"There are Heroes here today?" he exclaims. Young ones, by the look of it. Maybe sidekicks? Katsuki doesn't know any active Pros with a suit that green, but even sidekicks are much cooler than goldfish and tall chairs.

"Oh, him?" Mitsuki says, angling towards the Hero's back. He seems distracted, like he's looking for someone. "That's Izuku."

Katsuki whirls on his mother with an open-mouthed scoff. "It is not."

She couldn't even think of something believable to try and trick him with!

"Kacchan!"

The Hero is looking at them now with wide, startled eyes. There's a scar running down his cheek now but Katsuki knows that face. And he knows that Deku doesn't have any older siblings or cousins, either.

But the Hero in front of him looks strong. He's about the same height as Mitsuki, with a shiny, silver mouth guard hanging around his throat and white, techy-looking gloves that go up to his elbows and a real, honest-to-god Hero suit with orange accents and knee braces and everything!

Katsuki turns back to his smirking mother. "It's not," he denies weakly.

"Oh?" Her eyebrow arches, amused.

"It can't be!" Katsuki looks between Deku and his mother and back again. "He looks cool!" he whines, agitated. 'Deku' and 'cool' don't belong in the same sentence! Ever!

He's so caught up in the complete insanity of it, he doesn't notice his mother handing him off until Deku's already holding him. "Hi, Kacchan," he murmurs, his voice much deeper than Katsuki remembers it. "You think I look cool?" he asks hopefully.

Katsuki's face is burning. He glares at his traitorous, traitorous mother. He hadn't meant for Deku to hear that!

"No!" he lies, listing in Deku's grip to get his curious hands on the mouth guard. His mouth fogs the surface of it when he traces over all the little lines from top to bottom. "It's stupid," he says.

"Um."

Katsuki reaches for Deku's hand and Deku lets him take it, gentle while Katsuki turns his palm this way and that, poking at all the extra bits and features that probably do really cool- no! Really boring things.

"Oh my god!" someone squeals. "He's so cute!"

Then hands that are not his mother's start to close around Katsuki's torso. He opens his moth wide and screams.

Deku jolts, craning his head away but otherwise keeping Katsuki steady against his chest and shoulder. "Why are you screaming?" he frets.

Katsuki shoots him a gobsmacked expression, gesturing at the pink girl with interesting horns and her grinning lackeys. "Because they were trying to kidnap me," he exclaims, because Deku apparently needs the obvious spelled out for him. "You were just gonna let them!"

Deku looks almost offended for a moment, then his expression clears into something more steady. He leans back into Katsuki's space, their foreheads and noses nearly brushing. "I would never let anyone kidnap you," he promises seriously, swaying gently. Then he smiles and gestures with his head at Katsuki's not-kidnappers. "These are some of our classmates."

"No they're not," Katsuki immediately denies. He would know if there was a girl with horns in his class.

"Um, our class in the future," Deku corrects. "Our hero classmates." Then, to the "classmates", a sheepish, "He'd probably be more interested if you guys were in costume."

"Righto bossman," the blonde one says, skipping away to the changing screens with a mischievous grin. The girl with horns and the boy with weird elbows follow.

Katsuki squints at Deku suspiciously. "You're not the boss," he declares, unwilling to phrase it as a question.

"I am not the boss," Deku confirms easily, grinning at Katsuki. "That would be our teacher, Aizawa-sensei. He's by the coffee machine."

A thought strikes Katsuki then and he grips the shoulder of Deku's costume tightly. "I'm a Hero," he says. "That's my Hero teacher. We're-" Katsuki looks around the studio with sudden interest, "we're taking Hero pictures."

Deku's grin broadens. "That we are."

Katsuki slaps at his shoulder. "Put me down! Put me down!"

Deku drops him carefully and Katsuki takes in the room with a slow circle. He can see Heroes in costume getting their photos taken, his mother styling some of them in her fashion clothes instead but they must all be Heroes. And Katsuki was here getting his photo taken too! How fucking cool!

"I have a Hero costume," Katsuki realizes. Then he gasps, looking up at Deku. "The black! The black stuff I woke up in!"

"Kacchan's so smart!"

"I wanna see it! Where'd it go?"

"Umm," Deku says, looking around the studio himself. "I think I saw someone taking it to be hung up."

"Where?" Katsuki shouts.

"This way," Deku says, laughing slightly, "follow me."

Katsuki does, still looking wildly around the space, trying to soak up as much as he can. He reaches out for Deku's costume leg, then frowns when he realizes he can't take hold of it. It's too molded to his leg. The texture reminds Katsuki of some of the models he's seen getting their photos taken here before, and of the photographer with the red hair who liked to complain at the refreshments table.

"Deku, are you a whore?" Katsuki asks.

Deku stops short. His eyes blow wide, eyebrows up to his hairline, and his face turns red like a strawberry. He crouches with his gloved hands on his knees, his attention locked on Katsuki. "Am I a what?" he whispers, halfway screeching.

"A whore," Katsuki repeats confidently. "Since you're wearing a skinsuit."

Deku looks at his costume in horror. "It's- it's a jumpsuit!" he defends. "For less air resistance."

Katsuki tilts his head. That sounds like a cool thing: air resistance. Before he can start to wonder why Deku would need such a thing, or how Deku has become a Hero at all without a quirk, Deku asks where he heard that word.

Katsuki shrugs. "Eno-san used to say it a lot." He grins. "Why? Is it a bad word?"

Deku buries his burning cheeks in his hands before meeting Katsuki's gaze again, looking like someone had slapped him in the face with a fish. "Yeah?" he croaks. "It's- it's certainly not nice."

"Whore!" Katsuki taunts. He pokes Deku's scar with his finger. It's rough to the touch. Katsuki pokes his other cheek and the skin dimples under his finger.

"Ugh," his mother's voice groans, walking over to them with her arms full of fabric rolls. "Eno-san," she sneers. "God, that woman was a total loser. Fired her ages ago, pup, and glad for it."

"Oh," Katsuki says. He's never heard anyone else use the word whore and Katsuki doesn't know if he wants to take vocabulary from a loser, even if it makes Deku turn hilariously red. Then, "I'm not a pup!" He scowls, puffing out his cheeks. "Or a baby!"

Mitsuki opens her mouth.

"Or a brat!" he interjects before she can say anything.

"Fine," she says, rolling her eyes, "what the hell am I supposed to call you then? My little Too Big For Nicknames?"

"Call me my name," Katsuki demands. "You picked it."

Mitsuki crosses her arms. "I'm not convinced you didn't come out of the womb and name yourself."

"Ugh," Katsuki groans, pushing at Deku's crouched form with both hands. "C'mon, we're busy."

"Oh, far be it from me to interrupt His Highness," his mother snickers. "Go on then."

"We will," Katsuki announces, taking hold of Deku's hand since his pant leg isn't an option. Deku has to crouch to keep them connected and Katsuki preens, a little bit, at the subtle confirmation that Katsuki's the boss.

Deku whisks them back around the changing screens and to a big locker room where they weave in between rows of benches and people who call out, "Hey, isn't that-?" only to be whisked along faster.

Hanging from the slats of a locker on the tallest row is a Hero suit. Black, with a bright orange X over the chest and baggy pants highlighted with a deep army green. He has knee guards too- and shoulders!- of that same shiny material that makes up Deku's mouth guard, and tall, tall boots with bright orange soles perfect for stomping all over villain faces.

"What's- what's hanging from the-?" Katsuki stumbles, so excited he could burst, eyes locked on something else black hanging off the top of the costume.

"It's your mask," Deku whispers, reaching up to pull it down for Katsuki.

It's cool. Angled to cover the top half of his face in sleek black, with big explosions that fan out from the back of his head like- like a venomous lionfish!

Deku takes off his gloves to help Katsuki affix the mask. His hands are scarred, too, but Katsuki can barely pay attention to that new detail when those hands are guiding him to a nearby mirror.

Katsuki's grin is so wide it could split his face wide open.

"You normally have gauntlets, too," Deku murmurs, raising both of Katsuki's arms and miming where they would go. "They're shaped like grenades."

Katsuki pops off a few small explosions in his hands, imagining himself taking down a whole army of villains by himself.

"And you have special gloves," Deku tells him.

"Like yours?" Katsuki asks, reaching for where they hang in Deku's red belt with newfound curiosity.

Deku smiles, even though one of his gloves falls onto the ground with Katsuki's over-eager tugging. "Not quite," he says. "Yours help concentrate your sweat."

"For bigger explosions!"

"Exactly! And they match your costume. Green on the top and orange on the hands."

"Boom!" Katsuki cheers, aiming his open hand towards Deku's face.

"Boom!" Deku agrees, scooping Katsuki into his arms with a bright laugh. Together they put the mask back onto Katsuki's costume, pristine and ready for his future self, and tuck Deku's gloves back into his belt.

On their way back into the main studio, amidst all the flashing lights, another thought strikes Katsuki.

"Did I already take my Hero pictures?"

"Yeah," Deku says. "You and me went first, and then we'll take a big group photo at the end."

"Where are they now?" Katsuki asks. "Can I see them?"

"Uhm," Deku says, looking around. "I don't actually know where those pictures are now. But, um, I have some photos of Kacchan on my phone?"

"Where?" Katsuki asks, squirming and pawing at Deku's costume until he sets him on his feet. Katsuki rises on his tiptoes and pops open the biggest red container on Deku's belt. He grins when there's a phone inside. It lights up in his hands, and behind the time at the top of the screen and a message at the bottom to puhleasssse stop hogging the baby, there's a picture of Katsuki. Big Katsuki. He's lying down in a bed holding up a middle finger, only part of his face visible and half of his hair spikes matted down with sleep. Katsuki's not sure, but he thinks his older self might be talking at whoever's behind the camera. He looks secretly happy. And strong. His shoulders are probably even bigger than All Might's!

The screen goes dark. "Is this my phone?" he asks, confused. Why is Deku hanging onto it?

"Uh, no," Deku says, a little sheepish, "it's mine, Kacchan."

He's crouching again so Katsuki pushes at his shoulders until he's truly sitting, the both of them tucked alongside a wall and mostly out of the way. He perches himself sideways on Deku's leg, shoving the device towards Deku without relinquishing his grip on it.

"Open it."

Deku hums, rearranging Katsuki's impatient limbs until his phone is still enough to tap at.

"I know your password now, dummy," Katsuki taunts, pleased by his secret knowledge.

Deku huffs a laugh. "Well, that's okay."

Deku clicks on something, then crowds his chin on top of Katsuki's head while Katsuki investigates the photos, one of Deku's arms looped comfortably around his back. Katsuki taps his feet up and down on the ground between Deku's knees as he swipes.

He sees himself making a face at the camera with dark makeup smudged around his eyes, an arm thrown over a laughing Deku's shoulders. There's a few of Katsuki in what he guesses is someone's house with a bunch of other Heroes in their pajamas. He's got green muck all over his face like his mom sometimes does at night and the him in the photo is smearing it over Deku's face. In the next one, he's lobbing a huge glob of it at a Hero with bright red hair.

There's Katsuki with big sunglasses over his face, flanked by two other Heroes in matching glasses, all posing- one of them is the pink girl from before but the other is a girl with purple hair and red triangles over her cheeks. They look like they could be on the cover of a punk rock music album.

Katsuki eagerly scrolls through the pictures, only stopping at the ones where he sees himself:

Him at the drums with a real band (but without the pink girl).

Him at the grocery store calmly debating between two drinks while the dark-haired and blond boys from before are collapsed on the ground next to a yellow, Caution Wet Floor sign, seeming like they were trying and failing to get back up.

Katsuki with a grumpy cat balanced on his head, frowning at the camera.

Katsuki squishing Deku's cheeks together in their soot-covered Hero costumes.

Katsuki making middle fingers at the camera from his cross-legged place on top of a planking Deku's back.

Katsuki and Deku asleep on a couch together, hugging.

Katsuki jumping on Deku in the middle of a snow-covered lawn while snowballs lob his back.

Then Katsuki comes across a video.

"What's this?"

"Um!"

Katsuki hits play and finds a news clip of Deku responding to some reporter's questions. The Deku in the video looks awkward and the reporter keeps mentioning how romantic Deku is. As if! Katsuki's about to swipe away when he sees himself stomp into frame, turn Deku's head, and kiss him square on the mouth.

In the video, Katsuki and Deku walk away together and the camera pans to the reporter's gaping expression.

Katsuki laughs, pointing. "Look at her stupid face! Ha-ha!" Then he keeps swiping.

There's…kind of a lot of kissing photos. Even if some of them aren't really kissing- Katsuki biting Deku's unscarred cheek or their heads pressed so close together their hair mingles. They still feel like kissing pictures. Like the wedding ones his parent's keep in the living room and a new thought wriggles its way to the front of his mind.

"Do we live in a house?" Katsuki asks, letting the phone droop in his hands.

Deku lifts his heavy head from Katsuki's hair, to look at him better. "We live in a dorm right now, Kacchan."

"But we will live in a house?" Katsuki presses.

Deku looks confused. "Uh, maybe an apartment? Houses are really expensive."

Katsuki's nose wrinkles. "But we're Heroes!"

"Hero students, technically," Deku says. "We're in our third year. No paychecks yet."

"Ugh," Katsuki complains, "fine. So when we get money we'll live in a house?"

Deku tilts his head like a bird.

Katsuki doesn't know why he's being so stupid. The only people Kacchan knows who…who kiss (blegh) are his parents and they kiss because people who are in love live in a house and they put those cringey pictures on the wall and have a dog or a kid or maybe both. Old ladies have cats. That's how it works.

So he and Deku have to have a house, right? As soon as they get money?

"I-" Deku's eyes seem to clear and brighten, like he's figured something out.

Katsuki crosses his arms, defensive.

How dare Deku figure something out by looking at him and reading it out of Katsuki's eyes!

"Yes," Deku says fondly, "we'll live in a house."

"Hmph." Katsuki's shoulders untense. He tries to imagine why he would ever want to live in a house with someone in the first place, let alone Deku, and comes to the only possible conclusion.

"So you're the number two Hero?"

"Still a student," Deku reminds him kindly.

Katsuki rolls his eyes. "So you're the number two student?"

"You're the number two student," Deku says.

"What?!"

"I'm number three."

Katsuki pauses, thinking of all the other people he saw in Deku's photos. "…who's one?"

"Momo," Deku answers easily, the pushover. He doesn't even seem bothered. He points at a tall girl with a really big ponytail having tea by the refreshments table. "She's right over there."

Katsuki squints. She seems okay. Her Hero costume is red, which is almost as cool as orange and maybe tied with green. He can't figure out what her quirk is by looking at her, but Deku doesn't have one at all, so it makes sense that she's beating him.

It does not make sense that she's beating Katsuki. Probably a fluke. But that proves Katsuki's whole kissing theory wrong.

"So why don't I live in a house with her, if she's the best?"

Deku purses his lips, glancing between Katsuki and the number one student. "Because you like me better," he declares.

"Then you have to beat her. That's how it works. Is older me stupid or something?"

Katsuki couldn't kiss someone who wasn't the best. As if! 

"No, Kacchan, he's not stupid!" Deku's huffs a surprised laugh. "How- how would I beat her, anyway?" he asks. "We're at a photoshoot."

Katsuki looks around for his All Might backpack, then remembers he doesn't have it because he's in the future. "MA!" he calls.

"WHAT?" she shouts back from across the room.

Katsuki makes a beeline for her, trusting that Deku will follow. "Ma, is the checkerboard still here? In the office?"

"Yeah," she answers, idly fluffing a round girl's hair in the mirror before adjusting the feathers of a boy with a bird head. She compares his feathers to a color swatch in her hand. "Course we do, brat."

"Bakugou, you're so cute!" the round girl squeals. Her costume looks like an astronaut suit. He looks her up and down.

"You're a whore," Katsuki says.

The round girl's mouth drops open, then she doubles over in laughter. "Oh my-oh my fucking god. What?"

"Katsuki!" his mother shouts.

"I'm so sorry, Uraraka," Deku stammers, bright red again. Heh. Bad words didn't make Katsuki embarrassed because Katsuki was the best.

…As soon as he got big again and knocked that ponytail girl's teeth in.

"Your costume doesn't suck," Katsuki tells the astronaut Hero before darting out of his mother's reach and to the office. He pulls out the checkerboard and sets it up on a short table prop nobody's using, then he corrals Deku and the number one student into sitting on either side.

"To the death!" he shouts. "Begin!"

Ponytail blinks with wide eyes, then reaches out to move a piece. "He's so adorable," she whispers under her breath.

Deku's face goes red again. "I know," he repeats in that same voice.

Katsuki intends to be their referee, more than used to his mother's sneaky cheating habits, but quickly discovers that Deku is terrible at checkers. Katsuki huffs at him whenever he hesitates or makes the wrong move, taps his foot when Ponytail takes his pieces. Then- then!- Deku gets a golden opportunity. Triple jump. So when Deku's hand starts to lift after the first jump, Katsuki leaps forward and clamps his hand down on Deku's like a madman, forcing Deku's bigger, crooked fingers back around the piece and moving his hand where it's supposed to go.

"Um," Ponytail says, holding back a laugh.

Katsuki jumps into the open space between Deku's bent knees, settling into his lap so Deku cab still see. "I'm on Deku's team!" he announces. "It's not cheating if it's teams."

"Quite right," Ponytail agrees.

Good.

Not that Katsuki was worried it would count as cheating.

Just to be safe, though, Katsuki guides all of Deku's moves with his own hand for the rest of the game, sometimes whispering explanations under his breath.

Deku rests his stupid, heavy head on Katsuki's again but it's fine 'cause Katsuki's in the zone and he decimates Ponytail to ash.

"I could beat you at checkers by myself, too," he tells her after they shake hands across the board, Katsuki moving Deku's like a puppet, to the great amusement of their spectators. "I'm the best at checkers."

Ponytail smiles. "Then I humbly accept my defeat."

Katsuki nods at her, chin tipped high and arms crossed over his chest. That means Katsuki is now number one, with Deku at two because they were on teams and Ponytail in third. Meaning his older self wasn't stupid, because he didn't get his ranking mixed up after all. 

"So you can't live in my house," Katsuki says, just to be clear.

"I wouldn't dream of it," she says diplomatically.

"Good, because I already saw the kissing pictur-hey!" Katsuki shouts, railing at the weird white tape curled around his middle. It yanks him into the air and towards the stupid kidnapping Heroes, now dressed in their costumes. Katsuki opens his palm to pop an explosion at the tape, but then Deku's there in an instant, pulling Katsuki back and breaking the tape with one hand.

"Try it, Sero," he says, voice light but eyes serious. And he's smiling. "I made a promise to Kacchan. I won't let him be kidnapped."

It's just for a second- one, single, silly second- but Deku reminds Katsuki of All Might.

And then there's a bright light and a bang and Katsuki is sitting buck naked on the ground, his clothes ripped to shreds, even though he'd literally just been in the dressing room.

"Kacchan!" Izuku shouts, whipping a blanket around Katsuki with efficiency.

"Deku," Katsuki says, far more calm than is really warranted, given the situation. He rises stiffly to his feet, eyes narrowed.

"Yes, Kacchan?" Izuku says innocently, stepping forward until their feet almost touch. Katsuki's bare feet. "I mean, Great Explosion Murder God Dynamight?"

Katsuki presses their foreheads together with a thunk.

Izuku grins back at him.

"Where are my clothes?" he rumbles.

Izuku's grin only widens. "I didn't do anything with them."

"Izuku."

"You got quirked into your five-year old self," Izuku says, answering the unspoken question. "You told me we're going to live in a house."

"The fuck?" Katsuki says, tugging his blanket more tightly around himself, shivering slightly. "Doesn't that brat know houses are expensive as shit? Why the fuck did that even come up? And where the fuck are my clothes?"

"No more clothes for Kacchan," Izuku sings, teasing, standing a hair's breadth away with his hands tucked behind his back- the picture of innocence.

Katsuki bites him. Hard. On the cheek.

"Okay, okay," Izuku laughs, shoving him off, mindful of the blanket. "Your mom took them somewhere. I genuinely didn't see where. Get off!"

"Bitch," Katsuki huffs, turning imperiously, his blanket like a cape behind him. "Coulda just said that. MA!" he shouts.

"Oh my god, he's the same," Sero laughs, clutching his stomach and leaning heavily on Kaminari.

Katsuki's mouth purses, tempted to figure out just what the hell he means by that, but he's more concerned with his current nakedness.

"I'M RIGHT FUCKING HERE!" his mother shouts back, approaching from the other side of the refreshments table, a handful of grapes in her hand. "Everything come back, then? All your bits and pieces?"

"Hag," Katsuki complains.

Mitsuki sighs dramatically, curling her hand around his blanket-covered arm to steer him towards the back. There are a handful of cheers as his classmates realize he's back to normal, and more than a little snickering at his state of dress, but he doesn't think anything has fallen to explosive ruin in the time he's been gone. Hell, the shoot is still proceeding, the rainbow colored tarps starting to roll out from storage.

The whole shoot is themed around class A's "coming out" as debut heroes, because all the media seemed concerned about lately was whether he and Izuku were or were not gay even though it had jack shit to do with heroics. (Polls say: Katsuki yes, Izuku no). Let 'em jump around like circus monkeys when they see everyone decked out in multi-colored shit, gay or not. 

Still, "What's the damage?" he asks. He knows his mother won't bullshit him. Not if a fucking quirk accident set back their big fuck you.

Mitsuki shrugs, tossing a grape into her mouth. "None?" she says. "Slight delay for the group shoot but I figured that would be the case anyway, what with all the employee's kids looking for autographs."

Katsuki hums, skeptical.

"Really," his mother says, pointing him towards a changing screen, his clothes folded neatly behind it. "Dumped you on Izuku-kun, who was already done, and that was that. You were real sweet with him, after you called him a whore."

"I called him what?"

She laughs. "I don't think you knew what it meant. Decided he was the best thing since sliced bread."

Katsuki frowns, stepping into his sweats. "He is," he says- obviously he is- but Katsuki had always been a fucking brat. Sweet didn't come until later. "What gives? I was a shit to him back then."

"Oh, I don't know," Mitsuki sighs, idly brushing through Katsuki's hair when he steps out from behind the screen. "I don't pretend to know how your mind works, Katsuki." Then she grins. "That's what Izuku's notebooks are for, right?"

Katsuki scoffs. "Goddamn stalker," he mutters fondly.

"Oi," Mitsuki huffs, smacking his head, but she's smiling, too. "That's my son-in-law you're disrespecting."

Katsuki rolls his eyes. "Yeah, well your precious son-in-law has yet to procure a ring, so maybe cool it with the favoritism, you old hag."

"True," Mitsuki concedes, "but he looks at you like you're the best thing since sliced bread. So."

She saunters away with smirk, shouting something to the lighting techs, and Katsuki watches Izuku lose pitifully in a game of checkers against a literal four-year-old. Probably the same one who had quirked him into a child looking for an autograph before.

"You so loved him," Mina coos, sidling up to Katsuki with a cheshire grin. "When I tried to hold you it was all 'kidnapping! Kidnapping!' But you let him hold you, like, the whole time."

"Familiarity?" Katsuki tries.

"You were like his teddy bear!" she accuses gleefully.

"I don't fuckin' know," Katsuki shoots back, shrugging. "Maybe those cheetah print tights of yours just screamed freak."

"Judgy, judgy," she chastises, wagging a finger. "I happen to rock those tights."

"Why did I call him a whore?"

"You called him a what?" she screeches.

"Fuckin'- nevermind," he says, scrubbing a hand over his face. "Forget I said that."

"I most definitely will not," she says, "but here. I collected some from everyone." She offers Katsuki her phone. "Photos never lie."

Katsuki settles himself on a bench with a good view of Izuku- now being ganged up on by multiple kids who actually know how the game of checkers should be played- and looks through the album.

He's in clothes he doesn't recognize, pouting in his mother's arms, and then in Izuku's. There are shots of him inspecting Izuku's gloves while the dork tries not to cry, and a short video where Izuku mouths he thinks I'm cool over Katsuki's oblivious head. Katsuki on his own two feet, poking at Izuku's bright red cheeks with glee. Katsuki letting Izuku lead him along by the hand.

There are a few sneaky shots of Katsuki gazing up at what must be his hero costume, the mask comically oversized on his face in the next handful of pictures. And Katsuki'd be lying if he said he wasn't pleased to have such obvious approval from his child self. Katsuki was fucking cool.

Then he's in Izuku's arms again, blathering away.

Izuku crouched on the ground while Katsuki shoves at his shoulders. Then Izuku flat on his ass with Katsuki perched on his leg, their heads ducked over something he can't quite see. Izuku's cheek pillowed on Katsuki's small head, holding him close.

It's strange, Katsuki thinks. He almost doesn't recognize himself. Even if that's his haughty grin standing over the checkerboard like a pint-sized referee. His obnoxious ego controlling Izuku's hand on the board. Izuku does suck, but Katsuki also hates cheating.

There's one, of Katsuki in Izuku's arms, shirt covered in tape and looking up at Izuku with big, red, shining eyes, like Izuku is the best thing since sliced bread, and Katsuki closes the album with a huff. The rest are all his normal self, blanket-clad and ferried through the studio. (There's one, he sends to himself, where Izuku's playful grin is inches away from Katsuki's scowl and sweet enough to melt butter).

"You liked me," Izuku teases, dropping into a cross-legged seat in front of Katsuki's bench, elbows tossed over Katsuki's knees. "You thought I was cool."

"Head trauma," Katsuki says. Then, "I see you freed yourself from the jaws of defeat."

"Well, your jaw is a lot more captivating. Thought I'd come out and investigate."

Katsuki rolls his eyes, hard, and Izuku laughs, reaching up to stroke the light stretch of pink over his cheekbones. He rises up on his knees to kiss the side of Katsuki's jaw.

"Corny," Katsuki complains. 

Izuku hums when Katsuki runs his fingers through his hair, adjusting the curls that have spun out of place.

"He saw that video, you know," Izuku says.

"What video? Where I lapped your ass in Mario Kart?"

"No," Izuku huffs. "I delete that one every time you send it to me. The reporter one."

Katsuki pauses, tilting Izuku's face up to meet his gaze. "The one that spawned this whole shoot?" he asks incredulously. "Where I shoved my tongue down your throat?"

Izuku colors red, canting his gaze away but letting his head remain pliant in Katsuki's hands. "You can't really tell that from the video."

"You showed him that?"

"He clicked on it!" Izuku defends. "And I let it play. And he got a good laugh about the reporter's face."

Katsuki snickers.

"Just like you do," Izuku continues, rolling his eyes, "and he really ignored the whole gay thing. I was expecting some classic Kacchan outrage."

Katsuki arches an eyebrow. "Like?"

Izuku screws up his face, whisper-yelling. "What do you mean I kiss that stupid Deku on the lips when I grow up?"

Katsuki pulls on his ear. "I don't sound like that."

"Yes you do." Izuku bats his hand away, pushing it back into his hair. "Anyways, he was surprisingly on board. Only judgmental over our lack of home ownership."

"You mentioned that."

"Because your parents kiss and they live in a house," Izuku declares happily. "I'm, like, ninety-nine percent sure that's the answer. True love equals house."

Katsuki makes a face. "Who said you're my true love?"

Izuku grins, eyes shining with mirth. "Well I must not be, considering you still look like a toad."

"I do?" Katsuki sneers, offended. He pulls Izuku in by the chin and kisses him soundly on the mouth. "Bitch," he breathes. "You're green."

Izuku's shoulders shake with silent laughter. "Your- your face," he wheezes.

"Eat my ass."

Izuku widens his eyes comically. "In public?" he whispers, still laughing.

Katsuki burns bright red, shoving Izuku's stupid, giggling face away with the palm of his hand. "Not- you ass! That wasn't a request!"

"Sorry, sorry," he giggles, breathing out slow to calm himself, "too good to pass up."

"Why'd I call you a whore?" Katsuki demands.

"Oh my god," Izuku laughs again. "Because my costume is too tight. You called Uraraka one, too, even though you liked her costume."

Katsuki sighs. "Jesus fucking christ."

"It was shocking! But still weirdly cute."

"You're weird," Katsuki replies petulantly.

Izuku waits expectantly, but when Katsuki doesn't add anything, goes, "You're supposed to say weirdly cute."

Katsuki pretends to think, pushing Izuku's face this way and that to examine. "Nah," he decides. "Just weird."

Izuku does his best offended face. Then he shifts to a crouch, pushing up on his toes to kiss Katsuki squarely on the mouth, parting with a smack, smiling and breathing in Katsuki's space. "Bitch," he whispers mockingly, too much joy in his voice for the insult to work.

Katsuki barks out a laugh, then presses a matching kiss to Izuku's cheek, hugging him tight.

"You love me."

"God help me. I do."

"Places, everybody! It's time to shoot!"