Chapter Text
Peter Parker was having a very bad week. First, he had four tests. Four. On the same day. Then he got wrapped up in some sort of drug-dealing mafia that had him far too late in the night.
That was what Peter was doing right now. Daredevil was getting some much-needed rest after breaking four ribs, and Dead-Pool was out of the state on some business, leaving Peter entirely on his own for tonight.
“Hey guys, why can’t we just get along for once?” he complained, ducking as a glowing energy beam nearly decapitated him. Seriously, why do they always have alien tech?? It's getting a little predictable, he thought, web-stripping a blaster from a guy in a black ski mask. He made quick work of the remaining thugs. The sooner he finished, the sooner he could collapse face-first into his much too-small bed.
He made it home with relative ease, only having to stop three car thieves and one armed robbery. At least the week can’t get much worse than this, was his last thought before drifting off to sleep. So, yes, Peter was having a very bad week. And it was only Tuesday.
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Wednesday started with a cold cup of coffee and a pop quiz Peter was way too tired for. By 4:00 PM, he could only hope the worst part of his day was behind him.
He was –as always- wrong.
Crouched on the ledge of a brick building, his spider-sense didn’t just tingle—it screamed. A heavy, mechanical thud landed on the gravel behind him, followed by the unmistakable whir of a repulsor powering up.
But Peter had already moved without thinking. The next thing he knew, he had webbed himself four buildings away and was staring at the spot where he had been.
“Oh, come on, Spidey,” he heard Stark shout, “We just want to talk.”
“Yeah, I don’t know about you, but this isn’t how I like to start conversations,” Peter fired back, spotting a shadow on the roof with Stark.
“Look kid, we know you just want to do some good. We can help you with that, you just need to come with us,” tried Captain America.
“No thanks. I think I do enough good on my own.” And with that, he swung himself away. However, he could still hear the moment Stark said, “Nice going, Rogers. You scared him away with your patriotic bullshit.”
Peter didn't wait around long enough to hear Cap’s retort. He dove headfirst into a steep freefall, plummeting toward the narrow, chaotic maze of the Queens alleyways where Iron Man’s bulky armour wouldn't be able to follow.
"He's going low!" Steve’s voice echoed faintly from the rooftop comms, loud enough for Peter's enhanced hearing to catch. "Stark, don't let him break sightline!"
"On it, Cap," Tony sighed, "Hey, do me a favour, next time stick to the PSA’s and let me do the talking. "
A sudden rush of wind blasted behind Peter as Tony went into a dive trying to tail him. Peter's muscles screamed in protest. His four tests from Tuesday felt like a lifetime ago, and right now, all he wanted was to escape these two super-soldiers and take a nap.
He could hear Rogers on the rooftops, running at super-human speeds to keep following. Well, the rooftops have got to end somewhere, he thought already swinging to a more wooded area of the city. Soon, Rogers ran out of rooftop to sprint on. One Avenger down, one to go. Easy-peasy.
"Oh, very clever, arachnid," Tony’s voice crackled through the trees as the repulsors thrummed above the canopy. "Luring me into the lumberjack zone. You think a few branches are going to stop a multi-billion-dollar suit?"
Peter zipped sideways, narrowly dodging a tree trunk as he swung. "Not stop you, Stark! Just... heavily inconvenience!"
He fired a web-line directly onto Iron Man’s faceplate, blinding his cameras for a split second, and used the momentum to rocket himself downward into a thick patch of bushes. He held his breath, pressing his back against the dirt, desperately hoping the suit's infrared scanners wouldn't pick up his body heat through the dense foliage. Thank God for shitty thermoregulation.
Eventually, Stark gave up the search, flying off to find the star-spangled dipshit. Great, thought Peter, not only do I have schoolwork, supervillains, and a fucking bedtime on my shit list. Now I have the Avengers too. Peter knew that if Aunt May ever found out his identity, none of those would be the thing to take him out.