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The Justice League founders all look to the door as the speakers announce the arrival of various personnel from the Zeta Tube.
“They finished the mission? So early?” Barry asked.
“Let’s hope so.” Hal says.
Welcome Starfire, Flash II, Raven, Cyborg, Beast-Boy.
“Nightwing is missing.” Clark announced the obvious.
He stands from the table, putting himself in front of the door. Behind him the others rise, Hal surrounds himself in a light layer of lantern projection, lifting his feet off the ground and Oliver notches an arrow.
“Should I call Bruce?” Diana inquires.
The speakers crackle again, audio of the Zeta announcing several more arrivals.
Red Arrow, Artemis, Bizzaro.
“Red Hood is missing too.” Jonn says.
Hal sighs and shakes his head. “Spooky is gonna be so pissed.”
Superboy I, Impulse, Wonder girl.
“Sounds like all of the bat-brats got hurt.” Oliver observes.
Barry sucks a breath through his teeth. “This is going to be very, very bad.”
Superboy II.
Clark squares his shoulders. Three teams sent on a mission, of each team one person compromised following a pattern of association. Association with Batman.
The teams scramble into the room, panic obvious enough you wouldn't need telepathy to tell. Clark surveys the crowd and can’t see a single Bat associated person. He looks at his son's worried face and sees he’s. . Holding a fluffy black cat?
Diana steps beside Clark and they share a look. This is bad, it conveys.
They both then see a wolf, held by Bizzaro, a fox, held by the first Superboy, and a bluejay, held in Beast-Boy’s hands.
This is worse than bad. Clark thinks. This is weird.
Diana steps forward and when she speaks her voice is loud and clear. “Report! What happened?”
The teams speak over each other, a cacophony of voices each trying to explain. Clark can’t help but cringe and behind him Jonn loses his patience.
“Quiet!” He orders over the noise. “Take a collective breath and speak one at a time.”
The worried teammates quiet themselves. Kori steps forward, taking the lead. Before she could say anything, four animals made themselves known.
A blue jay pecks its way out of Beast-Boys hands, who yelps in disbelief. It flies overhead with chittering chirps. Using the distraction the bird has caused a wolf, fox, and black cat pounce forth.
“Jason, bad dog!” Artemis scolds.
“Dick! Get down here!” Wally whines.
“How did Tim get out?!” Cassie asks Conner who is quick to defend himself.
“Damian! Get back here!” Jon cries, flying to the front of the group.
“Damian?” Barry asks. “As in Robin?!”
“And the rest of the bats turned into animals too?” Hal shouts. “What the hell happened?!”
Kori explains. “The first time we got the witch into custody, they managed to escape and then turned Richard, Jason, Timothy, and Damian into animals.”
“Do you have the witch in custody now?” Oliver asks.
“Yes, we handed them off to be dealt with.”
Diana pets Jason’s head, who had crept close in the distraction of the commotion. “And do you know what the witch said?”
Raven frowns. “No. I tried to turn them back myself, but without knowing the spell I have no idea how to reverse it.”
Jonn shakes his head. “Then we’ll call Zatanna.”
Zatanna arrives and just as quickly as she does she also drops to the floor, clutching her stomach laughing.
“Oooh, this is adorable!” She cries. She holds her phone in hand and aims to take pictures of the nearest victim in her path, Damian.
“Bruce is going to love this!”
Damian, even as a small cat, is no less skilled. He hisses at the woman, feigning for a lunge with his claws. Zatanna ducks, distracted which allows Damian to escape.
“Oh, c’mon!” Zatanna complains. “Won’t one of you let me take pictures??”
The rest of the Bat-vigilantes turned animals evade her advances. Clark clears his throat.
“While this has been entertaining,” he ducks Dick’s agitated attack, “It is very important we return them to normal.”
“Very important.” Barry agrees. “I don’t want to know how upset Bruce will be.”
Zatanna rolls her eyes, waving them off. “Please, Bruce would love to see this.”
Diana chuckles. “I have no doubt the sappy man would, but we can both agree that we should have a solution. He would want his kids back.”
“And they have lives they need to get back to.” Cyborg interjects. “I don’t think the four of them would want to be animals for the rest of their lives.”
Faintly Garfield and Raven engage in a conversation about the pro’s and con’s of being an animal. It ends when Garfield turns into a bird and flies next to Dick.
Zatanna nods her head, agreeing. “Well, what spell did the witch say?”
Impulse, along with the rest of the speedsters, shuffle in place.
Kori frowns. “We have no clue what the witch said.”
Zatanna groans, burying her face in her hands. “Of course you don’t.” Placing her hands on her hips she faces the assorted heroes again.
“Isn’t there some security footage you can check?” She asks.
“We tried,” Cyborg says. “But the spell the witch cast had a concussive effect and temporarily suspended the cameras.”
“Of course it did.” Zatanna sighs.
Timothy bumps his head into Zatanna’s leg, grabbing her attention.
“Huh?”
He zooms to Kon’s side and starts pulling at the leg of his uniform.
“Hey- Tim! What are you doing?” He shouts.
The rest of the brothers seem to get the idea. Richard drops from the sky and pulls on Oliver’s hood, Jason pulls on Clark’s cape, and Damian plays with Diana’s dangling lasso.
“What are they doing?” Hal asks.
Diana chuckles, playing with Damian. “I’m unsure, but it’s very cute.”
“I don’t understand why they’re messing with some of our uniforms.” Jonn says, shaking his head.
Zatanna gasps. “Ooooooh, I get it!”
Barry follows her revelation. “There’s something about the uniform!”
“What about the uniform?” Garfield asks.
“I know that Bruce has his cowl recording when he’s patrolling or on a mission. Their masks must have the same things.”
All together Richard, Jason, Tim, and Damian stop tugging.
“Huh, makes sense.” Bizzaro says.
Roy pats his back. “I agree, big guy. I understand how Jason could, y’know with the helmet, but masks?”
“At this point I don’t put anything past Bruce.” Oliver remarks.
“Who do we call that can get us access to their mask footage?” Cassie asks.
Zatanna smiles. “Oracle.”
They call Oracle, Barbara Gordon. The image of her is projected on the large screen, her face bathed in green light as she stares at them, scrutinizing them.
“Oh, this is hilarious.” She whispers.
The four animals react in indignation. Dick squawks, Jason growls, Tim whines, and Damian hisses.
Barbara rolls her eyes. “Even as animals they’re noisy.” She mutters. “What do you need me for? You have Zatanna.”
Zatanna smiles sheepishly. “I can’t really help without knowing the spell.”
The young woman on the screen raises a brow. “Really?”
“Seriously. I tried. I’m unable to unravel the magic affecting them.”
“So, I repeat.” Barbara speaks slowly. “What do you need me for?”
Diana clears her throat. “We need you to show us the footage from the attack.”
The only reaction the request gets from Barbara is widened eyes for a single moment. The sound of fast typing filters through the speakers.
“I can do that.” Is the only thing she says.
The heroes don’t have to wait long, Barbara finds the footage quicker than it takes for a speedster to get bored.
“Okay, here it is from Richard’s perspective.” She announces and the recording plays.
The witch is kneeling, wrists bound in anti-meta cuffs. Based on the perspective it’s obvious Nightwing was the one to cuff them, as the hero rises to his feet.
“Make sure to get their mouth.” Red Robin states. “We don’t know if they cast verbal magic.”
Nightwing sighs and starts patting their costume. “Right, right. . . Shit!” He curses.
Red hood gasps, covering Robin’s ears. “Nightwing! Language! There’s young kids here!”
Robin beats Red Hood’s hands away.
“Shut up, Hood.” Nightwing scolds.
Red Robin frowns. “What’s the problem, Wing?”
“I don’t have anything to cover their mouth.”
Red Robin frowns further. “Neither do I.”
Robin puts his hands on his hips. “It's of no consequence. We’ll simply deal with the witch again if they should ever escape.”
“Right, right.” Red hood scoffs. “Because it was so easy the first time.”
Robin grunts, rearing to verbally attack Red Hood when the sound of the witches voice speaks off screen.
“It was easy, little kitten.” The voice rasps.
The perspective shifts quickly, Nightwing staring down the witch who is now uncuffed.
“Damn it, verbal Magic.” Red Robin curses.
“We’ll just do as Robin said.” Nightwing snarks. “Deal with you again.”
“And we won’t make the same mistake of keeping you conscious this time.” Red Hood threatens.
The witch continues to smile. “I’d love to see you try.”
Nightwing lunges forward, escrima sticks lighting with electricity. Just as quickly as the four heroes move the witch casts a spell.
“Oredadrev roma led oseb le sabicer euq sonem a anamuh amrof ut a sárevlov sámaj Y. ¡Aitseb anu ed amrof al atpoda! ¡Onacrec sám lamina oreñapmoc ut ed amrof al ocovni!”
As the spell is cast the footage cuts out.
The room is quiet, void of no noise except for breathing and the buzzing of the Watch Tower’s electricity.
“Wow,” Wally breaks the silence. “That was quick.”
“surprisingly fast.” Raven agrees. “Verbal spells usually take time to cast, for good reason.”
Roy crosses his arms. “Good thing that witch is off the streets.”
“Zatanna,” Jon says. He holds Damian in his arms, stroking him with teary eyes. “Do you know what the witch said?”
The magician shakes her head sadly. “Unfortunately I don’t. I know it was in reverse, but I have no idea what language it is.”
Clark wraps an arm around his son as Jon holds Damian closer. Bizzaro similarly picks up Jason, holding him close despite protests. Wally grabs Dick, clutching him to his chest and whispering apologies. The Young Just Us team crowd Tim and plan how to move forward with their friend trapped as an animal.
Barbara clears her throat. “I wouldn’t give up so soon. I can reverse the footage which would in turn make it easier to understand”
Multiple sighs of relief ripple through the room like a wave.
“Please, Barbara. If you don’t mind.” Jonn says.
Zatanna prepares herself, summoning a notebook and pen in order to write stuff down. The video plays, this time reversed.
“¡Invoco la forma de tu compañero animal más cercano! ¡Adopta la forma de una bestia! Y jamás volverás a tu forma humana a menos que recibas el beso del amor verdadero.” The witch shouts, the spell is cast, the camera cuts.
The witch spoke too fast for anything to be deciphered. Can’t make heads or tails of the language even when it isn’t reversed.
Zatanna grunts. “Ugh! Play it again, please. I didn't even get half of that written down.”
“I’ll play it slower.”
Barbara plays the footage a second time, slowed down marginally for easier transcription.
“I got it!” Zatanna cheers.
Raven, with Garfield perched on her head, looks over her shoulder. “Spanish? Interesting.”
“Why’s that?” The green shapeshifter asks.
Raven shrugs her shoulders. “Most spells you’ll come across are in Latin.”
“Thankfully,” Zatanna announces. “I know enough Spanish to translate the spell!”
The team members, everyone really, cheer happily. The four humans-turned-animals are especially so excited.
“What’s the spell? How can we turn them back?” Kori asks.
“The spell turns them into animals, obviously, you break it by —esaelp llor murd—” the room fills with the sound of invisible drums, a beat that builds anticipation.
“Zatanna please!” Barry cries. “Just tell us how to solve it!”
Zatanna frowns, the drum roll stops.
“Awh, I kinda liked it.” Bart comments.
Zatanna rolls her eyes. “True love’s kiss will solve the spell.”
Cassie laughs, hands clutching her stomach as she doubles over. Hal and Barry, despite being two grown men, can’t help but do the same. Clark and Diana themselves even think the spell is quite ridiculous. True love’s kiss? Why would the witch cast such a strange spell?
The Justice League founders and Zatanna gather to discuss. True love’s kiss? Is it romantic? Is it literal? Or perhaps it’s metaphorical. Should we interrogate the witch?
Oliver is all for confronting the witch, but Barry and Hal reason there’s no need to if they don’t have to. They’re supported by Zatanna, who insists that the spell is metaphorical.
“It requires a real fairy tale true love’s kiss.” She exclaims.
Diana chuckles. “You seem a little excited about this.”
“Not entirely,” Zatanna says sheepishly. “I just can’t help but remember the stories my father used to tell me.”
Clark smiles. “Like sleeping beauty. They need true love’s kiss for the spell to be reversed.”
Hal hums. “I never put much thought into how romantic this sort of thing is.”
“Just imagine your love being enough to wake someone from eternal slumber, return them from a beastly form, or even bring them back to life.” Barry rants. “I’m not much of a sap, but it is cute.”
Jonn tilts his head. “This seems to be a common fairy tale.”
On the other side of the room, the former humans turned animals struggle in embarrassment. Dick springs from Wally’s hands, Jason squirms in Bizzaro’s arms, Tim bites at his friends, and Damian throws a fit in Jon’s arms.
“Ah c’mon man!” Wally shouts. “It's not that bad!”
Dick ignores him and nests somewhere in the ceiling.
“Garfield, go get him.” Cyborg orders.
“Why? Because I can turn into a bird??” The shape shifter complains. “Kori can fly, she has to kiss him, she can go get him!”
Kori giggles. “Well, I can’t argue with that.”
Bizzaro is busy petting Jason as he howls, trying his best to comfort him.
“Feel embarrassed, big buddy.” Bizzaro says but it’s redundant since he speaks in opposites.
“Don’t you want a kiss from me, Jay?” Artemis teases. Jason howls loudly which elicits a laugh from Roy.
Jon is red in the face, refusing to look at Damian. He hasn’t put the cat down and Damian doesn’t seem intent on moving either.
With Young Just Us, Kon grumbles. He holds Tim a little tighter. “Does that mean we have to call Bernard?”
“Why? Jealous Kon?” Bart snarks.
“Shut up!”
“No, that’s a good point.” Cassie interrupts. “Does Tim’s boyfriend know he’s a superhero?”
Barbara speaks, her voice cracking as they enter the speakers.
“That’s a good question, Cassie. Bernard is aware that Tim’s a superhero and I have contacted him about the current situation.” She explains.
Kon frowns further whilst Tim yips and chirps.
In the corner with the founders Oliver complains. “You didn't ask if you could give a citizen access to the tower.”
“Ollie,” Clark interferes. “We don’t have much of a choice do we?”
“Well,” Hal tries to say but a glare from Clark shuts him up.
“Its better if we monitor the situation here.” Jonn agrees.
Diana faces Barbara on the monitor. “When can we expect Bernard?”
“Right now.” Barbara smiles.
Through the speakers, the zeta announces the arrival of Bernard Dowd.
“I’ll go get him,” Barry says. “He’ll definitely need a guide.”
The speedster zips quickly out the room and the rest of the founders gather the teams.
“Can Kori, Artemis, and Jon step forward with their friend?” Zatanna requests.
Kori, Artemis, and Jon step to the front as instructed. Kori sternly holds the bluejay in her hands, Artemis a squirming wolf, and Jon an agitated black cat.
Barry returns with Bernard, the blond looking around the room. He points at the loud fox in Kon’s arms.
“That’s Tim, isn’t it?” He smiles.
Bernard is unperturbed as Kon stares at him harshly. Bart steps in, laughing awkwardly.
“Yep! It sure is. Tim is just as annoying as a fox, isn’t he?”
“And clever too.” Bernard compliments.
“Kon,” Barry says. “Why don’t you give Tim to Bernard so they can join the others.”
Begrudgingly, Kon passes Tim to Bernard and they both stand in the center of the room with Kori, Artemis, and Jon.
“What do we do now?” Jon asks nervously.
Zatanna shrugs. “You do as the spell says. Kiss them and they’ll return to normal.”
Surprise and embarrassment shine brightly on Jon’s face who stares. Next to him Bernard is in a similar state of embarrassment.
Kori moves first, pressing her lips to Richard’s tiny head. Artemis follows, pressing a kiss to Jason’s snout. Bernard hesitantly kisses Tim’s head and Jon quickly kisses Damian.
The room is suspended in time, awaiting a magical transformation.
No transformation happens. There’s no magical glow or shift in the air. Dick remains a bluejay, Jason remains a wolf, Tim remains a fox, and Damian remains a cat.
Raven placed a comforting hand on Kori’s shoulder, the rest of the Titans behind her. Artemis visually droops, Bernard is stiff with embarrassment, and Jon is close to crying.
Clark rushes forward, wrapping his arms around his son.
“Ooooh. .” Zatanna says amusedly. On the screen Oracle shares her smile.
“I’m calling Bruce.” Barbara says and then disconnects.
Oliver snorts without any humor. “What could Bruce possibly do?”
Zatanna turns to him, posture shifting in a way that reminds Clark of a shark sniffing blood in the water and Diana of a beast.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” She asks.
“Not to be an ass, especially not to the point of agreeing with Oliver.” Roy interjects. “But I honestly don’t think Bruce will make the situation any better.”
Bruce’s four kids react in anger. Kori looks down pitifully, Artemis in understanding, Bernard strokes Tim’s head, and Jon whimpers lowly.
“What?!” Zatanna screams.
Clark puts an arm in front of her. “Y’know, I don’t think any of us know what we’re talking about.”
“Oh, Roy and Oliver definitely don’t.” Zatanna growls.
“I mean, I definitely don’t know much of the man.” Garfield admits. “We’ve met, but I mostly heard about him through Dick.”
Wally rolls his eyes. “Dick complains about anything Bruce does.” He throws an arm around Garfield’s shoulders. “He’s a good man, trust me.”
Raven smiles. “Wally is right, Dick loves his father a lot.”
Roy glares. “So, Dick will experience his magical true love’s kiss.” He mocks. “But what about Jason?”
Diana raises an eyebrow. “You think Bruce and Jason don’t love each other?”
The man rolls his eyes. “Well they certainly don’t act like it.”
Jason growls and howls, unable to say anything of substance since he’s. . . Well. . A wolf. But he’s visibly angry.
“Nevertheless.” Diana interrupts. “It wouldn’t hurt to have Bruce try.”
The room quiets at that, no one can bother to disagree that it wouldn’t hurt. But Bernard holds Tim tighter to himself and the Outlaws don’t look happy about it.
The speakers chime, and the Zeta announces the arrival of Bruce Wayne. The appearance of his figure in the door frame is well anticipated and the room holds his breath as his icy eyes survey the room.
“Barbara told me my presence was required.” His voice rumbles.
He offers no further greeting than that as he walks further into the room. Clark and Diana light up, smiling as he approaches.
“Hi Bee!”
“Hello, dear friend.”
“Clark, Diana, it’s good to see you.”
Zatanna smiles. “What about me?”
“You too, Zee.” He looks to the rest of the room. “Its good to see all of you.”
He stands next to Zatanna, looking at Kori, Artemis, Bernard, and Jon who hold animals in their arms.
“Did Barbara tell you what happened?” Diana asks.
Bruce grunts. “She did not.”
The founders chuckle lightly, Zatanna leans into Bruce’s side.
“Your sons were turned into animals.” She explains. “You’re the World's Greatest Detective, you can figure out who’s who.”
Bruce tilts his head. “What do you mean? Magic doesn’t exist.”
Time stops. The room freezes as the gathered teams stare in bafflement. Did he really just say that?
Zatanna rolls her eyes and slaps Bruce’s arm. “Cut that out! You’re so fucking annoying!”
“Its always them.” He says exasperated. “What do you suppose I should do?”
Zatanna smiles mischievously. “Give them True Love’s Kiss, of course!”
“What?”
“You kiss your kids and then they return to normal.”
Bruce nods. “I’m familiar with the concept, but magic doesn’t-”
Zatanna cuts him off. “SHUT UP and just kiss them!!”
Bruce chuckles, approaching Kori first. Dick is chirping madly, straining in her grasps in order to get closer to his father. Similarly, Jason, Tim, and Damian do the same.
Bruce clears his throat, holding his hands out. “If you don’t mind.”
Kori smiles, relinquishing Dick to his father and taking a step back.
Richard hops into Bruce’s cupped hands, chirping songs at his father.
“I’m surprised you’re not a robin.” Bruce joked.
He presses his lips softly to Dicks head, kissing him. When he pulls away Richard flies high into the sky skittishly, flapping his wings in an erratic fashion as his body faintly lights with soft electricity and he glows.
“It worked.” Raven whispers in astonishment.
His body morphs from the frame of a bluejay into himself, average height, lean muscles, and shaggy hair. He floats slowly to the ground, feet softly landing. The light dissipates revealing Dick in civilian clothes.
“Bruce.” He whispers.
“Dick.” Bruce replies.
The Titans, standing to the side, shuffle as they’re uncertain what to do. With how much Dick complains about his father, one would think that they have a tumultuous relationship.
“Tatiiiii!” Richard cries dramatically as he lunges forward, wrapping his arms around Bruce’s shoulders and his legs around his waist.
Bruce chuckles, patting Richard’s back. “Its good to have you back, chum.”
In Artemis’s arms Jason growls impatiently. Dick pouts at him, holding Bruce’s tighter.
“Wait your turn, you dog!” He scolds.
“Dick,” Bruce sighs. “I should really help your brothers.”
Dick whines and begrudgingly relinquishes his hold on Bruce. Clark steps forward and Richard dramatically hides his face in his neck.
Roy and Artemis stare stubbornly as Bruce approaches. Jason barks happily and Artemis puts him on the floor.
“Hello, Jay lad.” Bruce greets.
The wolf huffs impatiently and presses his head to Bruce’s face. His father laughes, kissing his son softly on the head.
Jason doesn’t float like Richard did. Instead, as his body glows, he crouches close to the ground and shifts from the larger body of a wolf into the larger body of a human. When the light fades Jason is kneeling on the ground in civilian clothes.
Standing up, Jason brushes himself off. “You’re such a sap, old man.”
Bruce smiles. “Maybe I am.”
Bizzaro smiles. “This is so disgusting.” He whispers.
Roy clears his throat. Jason ignores him in favor of wrapping his arms around his father. Before Bruce can return the gesture his son ducks under his arms and starts to tease his older brother.
It’s Tim’s turn. Bruce looks at his son with barely concealed amusement. Bernard scrutinizes the man, awaiting a comment. He doesn’t expect him to chuckle.
“Of course he’s a fox.” Bruce huffs with amusement.
Timothy pounces out of Bernard’s arms and into Bruce’s, yipping loudly. Bruce holds him still and kisses his head.
As with the previous transformations, Timothy’s body glows in a bright light. This transformation has more energy than his brothers, more electricity sparks from his body that Bruce has to drop him to the floor. Tim’s body shifts from a fox into a more human shape, slim shoulders and strong arms.
Timothy stands from the floor, looking inquisitively at his father.
“Why is it so expected that I'd be a fox?” He asks.
“Because you’re very clever, my dearest.”
Behind Bruce, Jason chimes. “It’s also because you’re fucking annoying!”
“You also stink!” Dick laughs.
Bruce sighs as Tim runs towards his older brothers, easily entering a fight.
“Damian,” Bruce says with reverence. “Dami, my blood.”
From Damian’s place in Jon’s arms he purrs. The little cat pounces from Jon’s arms and into Bruce’s.
“You’re so cute like this, my treasure.” Bruce praises.
Damian uses his paws to cover his feline face and Bruce kisses him.
The light that envelops Damian is dimmer than the others. The form of his kitten body shifts into the form of a child. Damian, now a human, is held against his fathers chest, blushing madly with embarrassment.
“Baba!” He whines. “You’re so embarrassing!!”
Bruce laughs as tiny fists beat against his chest. Behind him Dick, Jason, and Tim coo and mock their youngest brother.
Jonn steps forward. “Seems this problem was handled easily.”
“Yes, it was.” Bruce smiles. “If there’s nothing required of them, I would like to take them home.”
Clark chuckles. “I’m sure everything’s in order. If anything does come up we’ll take care of it.”
Dick cheers. He jumps on his fathers back and koalas him.
“Get down, Richard!” Damian growls.
Jason laughs. “Your fat ass is too heavy for his back, dickbert.”
“Shut up Jason! You’re such a fucking ass!”
Tim grabs Bernard’s hand. “Can Bernard come too?” He asks.
Bruce nods. “I don’t see why not.”
“Uhm, probably because they can’t keep their hands off of each other?” Jason says.
“Shut up Jason.” Tim punches his arm. “I can’t just leave him here!”
Bruce sighs. He turns his back and walks out of the room with Jason and Tim following, Bernard dragged behind them.