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Language:
English
Series:
Part 1 of Ever After High
Stats:
Published:
2026-08-03
Updated:
2026-08-21
Words:
21,360
Chapters:
19/?
Comments:
151
Kudos:
138
Bookmarks:
12
Hits:
2,901

Losers W/ Parental Issues (+ Maddie)

Summary:

Raven
Briar wtf

 

Briar
HI WELCOME TO PROBABLY A BAD IDEA

 

OR an Ever After High chatfic :D

Notes:

hiiii

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: there are approximately 600 trees matching that description

Summary:

In which:
Ashlynn is mom
Briar climbs a tree
Cerise climbs a wall
And Hunter is a good dad friend

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

AdrenalineJunkie created Loser W/ Parental Issues (+ Maddie)

 

AdrenalineJunkie added IntoTheWoods, Nevermore, ApplePie, ROCKNROLL, and several others

 

AdrenalineJunkie changed their name to Briar

 

AdrenalineJunkie changed several names

 

Raven

Briar wtf

 

Briar

HI WELCOME TO PROBABLY A BAD IDEA

 

Ashlynn

Sorry about her, she hasn’t slept in 

Well

A while

 

Apple

Briar. Go to sleep. 

 

Briar

NAH IM GOOD

 

Apple

Briar…

 

Briar

YEAH? 

 

Apple

I’m coming to your dorm

 

Briar

I MEAN

YOU CAN

IM NOT THERE THO

 

Apple

Where are you then? 

 

Briar

CLIMBING A TREE

 

Cedar

Which tree?? 

 

Briar

THE BIG ONE

 

Hunter

There are approximately 600 trees matching that description

 

Briar

:thumbsup:

 

Apple

Briar

Please get down from the tree

 

Briar

HMM

NAH

THE MOON IS VERY PRETTY TONIGHT 

IT’S TALKING TO ME

 

Apple

The moon is not talking to you

 

Maddie

ACTUALLY THE MOON IS OFTEN QUITE TALKATIVE

 

Raven

Maddie ur not helping

 

Maddie

I RARELY AM :D

 

Ashlynn

Briar, please come down from the tree

It’s 2am

 

Briar

BUT MOOOOMMMMMMM

 

Briar changed Ashlynn’s name to Mom

 

Mom

Does this mean you’ll get down

 

Briar

CAN I HAVE HOT CHOCOLATE AND CAKE IF I DO?? 

 

Mom

Uuhhhhh

Sure? 

 

Raven changed Briar’s name to Problem Child

 

Mom

She’s less of a problem child and more a leash kid tbh

 

Raven changed Briar’s name to Leash Kid

 

Leash Kid changed Raven’s name to Tall Pigeon

 

Tall Pigeon

??? 

WHAT THE FUCK BRIAR??? 

 

Leash Kid

HA

BITCH

 

Mom

BRIAR


Apple

Briar did you actually get down

 

Leash Kid

YEAH

 

Apple

Are you in your dorm? 

 

Leash Kid

UM

KIND OF? 

 

Cerise

No

She’s not

She’s on the window ledge

 

Apple

BRIAR

 

Leash Kid

UHHHHH

YES :3? 

 

Apple

GO INSIDE

YOU’LL FALL

 

Cerise

She just yelled “gods I HOPE so”

 

Leash Kid

FUCKING SNITCH

 

Cerise

Yep

 

Mom

New rule: no climbing things after midnight

 

Leash Kid

D:

THAT ELIMINATES

LIKE

62% OF MY HOBBIES

 

Mom

Then get new hobbies

Cerise, please get Briar inside

 

Cerise

Aye aye, captain

 

Leash Kid

HUH

WAIT

WAIT WTF

WHY ARE YOU CLIMBING UP THE WALL?? 

ACTUALLY—

HOW ARE YOU CLIMBING UP THE WALL??? 

 

Cerise

Skill

 

Tall Pigeon

HOW DO YOU TEXT AND CLIMB UP A REGULAR ASS WALL AT THE SAME TIME?? 

 

Cerise

Skill

 

Leash Kid

IAISUEJWNDKAJENDN

 

Cerise

So I took her headphones off and she pretty much immediately passed out

Also her music was up all the way

 

Tall Pigeon

Well that’s concerning

 

Cerise

Ok I put her in bed

 

Mom

K

I’ll be back at our dorm in like forty minutes, can you stay with her until then? 

 

Cerise

Yeah

 

Tall Pigeon

On a scale of Apple to Tiny how light was she

 

Cerise

Between Raven and Kitty

So like

Approximately a 3

 

Ramona

I’m confused what is that scale?? 

 

Cerise

Weight scale

Apple (skin and bones) and Tiny (a giant and the only one I can’t pick up)

Raven is 2 on the scale but tbh she should probably be like 1.5 instead

 

Ramona

Huh

 

Daring

Is Briar ok? 

 

Mom

Yeah she’ll be fine

She just has issues with sleeping


Mom

[image]

[ALT = “Briar Beauty, asleep in her bed, with Cerise Hood curled up at the foot of her bed like a dog.”]

 

Ramona

Haha blackmail :D


AdrenalineJunkieIntoTheWoods

 

Briar

Cerise? 

Where’d you go? 

 

 

Briar

…Cerise? 

Fuck

Fuckfuckfuckfuckfucjfk

 

 

Cerise

Oh hey sorry I didn’t see th

Briar? 

Shit

Hey, Briar, are you looking at your phone right now? 

Fuck


Cerise pocketed their phone and took off, ignoring her friends calling after them. She raced to Briar and Ashlynn’s dorm, cursing under her breath. They didn’t bother knocking, and threw the door open. 

 

Ashlynn’s bed was empty—she was probably at her shop, or out with Hunter, or helping someone with something. Briar’s bed was empty as well, but not neatly made like Ashlynn’s—it looked like she had thrown everything off of herself in a panic. 

 

Her ears twitched under her hood, picking up the sound of quick breathing and silent sobbing from a corner of the room. 

 

“Briar?” 

 

Cerise followed the sound, and found her friend wedged into the narrow space between her dresser and the wall, knees pulled up to her chest. They crouched down in front of her. “Hey, Rosebud, can you—can you breathe for me, please? Like this,” she took in a slow, deep breath. 

 

She didn’t get a response. 

 

“…Briar?” 

 

When Briar still didn’t respond, pulled out her phone, clicking on the first contact she saw and calling them. 

 

“Uh…hello? Cerise?” 

 

“Oh, Hunter—um, hi, sorry, never mind—”

 

“Ceri, calm down. What’s wrong?” 

 

“Briar is having a panic attack, I think, and I meant to call Ashlynn or Apple but I accidentally called you, sorry—”

 

“Shit—alright, I’m on my way, hang on,”

 

“No, really, it’s—”

 

“Briar is my friend, Ceri, I’m coming. Is she responding to anything?” 

 

“Um, I don’t—I don’t think so?” 

 

“Okay, do you know what happened?” 

 

“No, I—she texted me asking where I was, but I didn’t see it until, like, half an hour after, and when I got to her dorm, she was already like this,”

 

“Kay. I’ll be there soon,”

 

“…okay,”

 

Approximately three minutes later, Hunter burst in. Cerise moved out of the way, letting him kneel down in front of their friend. 

 

“Hey, Rose, can you hear me? It’s Hunter,”

 

Nothing. 

 

“Shit—alright, Rose, I’m gonna touch your knee, okay?” He didn’t wait for her to say anything, and gently put a hand on her knee. She gasped, her head snapping up. 

 

“…Hunter?” She whispered, eyes red from crying. 

 

“Hey, Briar. Cerise is here, too, see?” 

 

She looked past him, and tears started falling. “You—you’re still—you’re still here, you’re still alive, I—I thought—I woke up a-and you weren’t there—”

 

“Oh, Rosebud,” Cerise’s face softened. “I—I’m so sorry, I should’ve—I should’ve thought about that, I—”

 

Hunter stood up, holding out a hand to help Briar do the same. “My job here is done,”


Losers W/ Parental Issues (+ Maddie)

 

Leash Kid

I swear you don’t sleep for just FIVE DAYS and suddenly everyone is on your case

 

Tall Pigeon

fIVE DAYS??? 

Notes:

sorry for the briar angst my hand slipped