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“I refuse to have that janky, 2 dimensional heap of absolute festering shit as a decorative part of our multicultural festivities, again,” Karkat says, scrunching his nose as he spares The Kringlefucker another distainful glance.
Dave frowns, “It’s tradition.”
“It’s horrifying, I mean no offence to Jade but look at the fucking thing!”
“I’m quite sorry, Dave, but I have to agree,” Rose says, placing a box on the floor. “It was lovely last year, but perhaps this time you can put it in your own room where none of us will have to be exposed to it?”
Karkat folds his arms, lips curling into a smirk.
Dave stares at both of them behind his glasses for a few moments, but when they refuse to budge he resigns himself to picking up The Kringlefucker, “Fine, y'all can’t appreciate good art when you see it anyway, you don’t deserve to bask in the glory of something this ironically festive.”
Karkat rolls his eyes and is about to leave, but Dave reaches out to grab his arm.
“But, there’s one condition,” he says. “Ebenezer Vantas here has to hang the mistletoe.”
Now it’s Karkat’s turn to bore a hole in those sunglasses, but the more he glares, the more Dave’s smugness begins to show through.
“Fine,” Karkat snatches the plastic bundle of leaves from atop Rose’s box of decorations. “And I’ll do it without any shitty cheater god tier powers.”
“Have fun, dear!” Kanaya shouts after him as he heads for the computer block.
Hanging the mistletoe has always been something left to those with the ability to fly - considering it has to be tied to a pipe on the very high ceiling via a single, thin piece of string - but it’s not impossible for someone bound by gravity to accomplish… Just rather difficult.
“Oh come the fuck on!” Karkat growls, as the mistletoe sails just under the pipe and hits the floor.
He’s lost count how many times it’s happened, or how long he’s been trying, but at some point he gained a very small audience.
“You need to throww it higher,” Eridan says, glancing up from his book just in time to catch the full wrath of Karkat’s snarl.
“Yeah no shit, Sherlock! What do you think I’m doing?”
“Fuck you, Wwatson, I’m only tryin’ a help.”
Karkat raises an eyebrow at the very human reply to his human phrase (from someone who claims to hate the lot of them, no less) but says nothing and lines up another shot.
“I don’t see wwhy you’re ewen puttin it up,” Eridan doesn’t look up from his book, but Karkat can tell that he’s this close to brining out the Ampora pout. “Not like anyone except Kan and Rose is gonna get any use out a it.”
Karkat tips his head back and let’s out a deep sigh. If he doesn’t do something now, his friend is going to be moping around all night.
“You’re such a wiggler.” Karkat draggs his feet over to the couch, holding the mistletoe above his head as he plops down next to Eridan (who is still desperately trying to seem as if he’s only interested in his book).
Karkat waits a moment for Eridan to notice, but the sea dweller continues to ignore him, so he leans in and plants a considerably long smooch on Eridan’s cheek.
“There,” Karkat says, smiling at the way Eridan is violet from fin to fin as he pulls away. “Are you happy now, grumpy gills?”
Finally having lost interest in his novel, Eridan nods, fidgeting in his seat to face Karkat, but only giving him embarrassed glances.
“Wwell," he begins. "I guess you could say that, yeah.”
“Good.” Karkat gives him an extra peck for good measure, pressing their foreheads together afterwards. “Mistletoe isn’t just for Matesprits, you know.”
“Oh, is that so?” Eridan reaches up to twine his fingers with Karkat’s where the plant dangles between them.
“Yep,” Karkat says. “So why don’t you help me hang this thing?”
Eridan manages to get the plastic foliage over the pipe on his second try, and Karkat only resists growling at him because he looks so damn cute when he’s proud of himself.
Well, also because it means Karkat gets to listen to Eridan purr happily as they hold each other tight under the stupid replica Earth plant.
It’s times like this that remind Karkat how rewarding it is to have a Moirail - and how useful it is when said Moirail is a highblood with impeccable aim.