Work Text:
Loid almost made it out of the house– “Almost” being the key word.
He had been careful. Woke up extra early, popped a handful of pills that he’d “borrowed” from the hospital, and made his own breakfast as quietly as he could. He had known that if either Yor or Anya caught him, they’d somehow figure out what he was working so hard to hide.
That he was, for the first time in years, sick.
It was somewhat embarrassing to admit. Him, one of the greatest spies, taken down by a bug that Anya had likely brought home? The mere thought made him want to laugh.
But, none of that would make any difference if either of his girls noticed. He knew that the minute someone knew he was sick, there was no way he was making it to work. All he had to do was stay quiet and–
“Papa?” Anya’s sleepy voice made him jump.
“Ah, Anya. What are you doing up so early? School doesn’t start for another hour,” He hoped that she was too tired to hear the croak in his voice.
This was still fixable. As long as he didn’t draw any attention to himself, she wouldn’t realise he was sick, and he could still get to work on time, so–
“Anya? Loid? Is everything alright?”
Okay, he’ll have to think fast–
“Papa’s sick.”
Shit. He wasn’t sure how exactly Anya knew, but she had just blown his cover.
“What? Loid, is this true?”
“No, no, no. I can assure you, Yor, I’m,” his voice gave out and he felt his stomach drop, “perfectly alright. I think Anya needs to head back to bed, she seems to still be tired. Anyways, I should really get going, lots of patients to attend to, plus quite a bit of paperwork. See you tonight.”
He snatched his briefcase and made a beeline for the door, but didn’t manage to open it.
“Loid.”
“...Yes, Yor?”
It was moments like these where he felt a sense of fear. It wasn’t often he felt that emotion (unless it was worrying, he really did have a problem with that); but Yor was strong, shockingly so. She was also someone who he needed to avoid upsetting at all costs, unless he wanted to risk another kick to the head.
“Turn around.”
“I really do need to get headed, it’s quite unprofessional to be late-”
“Loid Forger.”
Anya’s sleepiness vanished, looking between her parents, “Papa’s in trouble.”
“I’m–” Loid started to deny it, but stopped; he was in trouble. Letting out a slow breath, he turned around, shoulders slumping ever so slightly.
Yor’s firm expression switched to dotting concern in the blink of an eye.
“Oh, Loid, you look terrible! You are going right back to bed, and I’ll call out of work to take care of you; it’s what a true wife would do, and you need to stay put and rest. I’ll take Anya to school today, now go lay down while I give Anya her breakfast."
“Yor, I’m really quite alright. I’m not sick enough to warrant missing work, and I don’t need to go to beEED-” Loid let out a noise of surprise as Yor’s hand wrapped around his wrist, yanking him into his room.
“Absolutely not!” She practically sent him flying into the bed,calling back at him as she rushed out of the room, “Change out of your work clothes or I’ll change them for you.”
Loid blinked, face going red with embarrassment; not wanting to face the utter humiliation of someone else getting him dressed, Loid quickly changed into a breathable top and a pair of Long cotton pants.He let out a tired sigh, rubbing the spot on his wrist where he had grabbed her, which was already turning red. Stupidly, he assumed that would be the end of it. However, when she came back moments later with a stack of blankets, he knew that it was far from it.
“Now, you’re going to stay put! And to make sure you do that, I’m going to tuck you in nice and tight! You know, I used to take care of Yuri whenever he was sick, and he always got better, so I know just what to do! I called the hospital and let them know that you won’t be in today– well, unless you’re there as a patient! Not that I’d let that happen though. Anyways, I’ll make sure that–”
“Yor, I think that you may be, ahem, cutting off my circulation.”
“Oh!” Yor’s hands quickly moved to undo the blankets.
Loid wasn’t wrong. There were visible indents where the blankets had been, skin already losing color. Yor felt her face flush in humiliation.
“Oh, Loid, I’m so sorry,” she let out a breath, sitting down on the side of the bed and burying her head in her hands.”Gosh, I really don’t know what I’m doing, do I? I just tried to restrain you! And the only other things I remember working were tying a green onion around the neck, and making tea from herbs, but I don’t know where I’d find any woodland plants this time of year, and Yuri did turn very purple when I tried the onion…You must think I’m a horrible wife; I can’t even take care of you.”
The room fell into silence. Loid wasn’t sure what made him do it, but next thing he knew his hand was resting on top of hers. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Yor’s face turned bright red, and he felt his own cheeks flushing hot (for reasons other than fever). Despite their embarrassment, though, neither pulled away.
“Well,” Loid started, sitting up and glancing at Yor, “while your caretaking methods may not be.. Ideal, per say, in complete honesty, I’m a little impressed. You do have some extraordinary strength, Yor. And.. I do appreciate the effort. It’s more than I’m used to, to be honest”
“That..That means a lot, Loid; thank you.”
“Mama and Papa are flirting.”
Both adults visibly jumped at the sound of Anya’s voice, heads whipping around to the doorways where their pink haired daughter stood.
“Wha-”
Before either of them could find the words to tell her off, she spoke again, puffing her chest out with pride.
“Anya knows what papa needs. Papa needs a nap. Whenever Anya is sick, mama and papa make Anya sleep, and so now Anya and mama will make papa sleep!”
“Oh. Well, that’s not a bad idea Anya,” Yor smiled, and for a split second, Loid thought about all the methods she might use to ‘make him sleep.’
Suffocate him? Hit him over the head? Force-feed him drugs to knock him out? Cook him something?
What she actually did was much less intense. Yor gave his hand a gentle squeeze before standing up, moving to turn off the lights and ushering Anya out. When she reached the door she paused, looking back at him.
“Let me know if you need anything, Loid.”
And with that she shut the door, leaving Loid alone in the quiet room, the only sound his heart hammering in his chest.