Archive of Our Own

Jisung sat curled up on the living room couch completely engrossed in the documentary he was watching. It was late and he was just waiting for Minho to return home. The older had been away on solo activities for something like two weeks, flying to a bunch of different countries and attending events. It had been a fun watch from the sidelines, seeing his hyung receive so much recognition but it had also left Jisung to take care of Minho’s cats, which had turned into a much bigger challenge than anticipated.

All three of the cats were normally well behaved but when they realized Jisung was the one in charges they had rebelled immediately. Refusing to eat the first day even though Jisung fed them the exact same way Minho did. Dori had disappeared one morning causing Jisung to panic, thinking he’d accidentally let him out somehow, till he found the rascal behind the laundry machines later that same day. Doongie and Soonie had chased each other till they toppled over one of their only two plants, leaving Jisung to come home to dirt all over the kitchen floor. He’d done his best to rescue the poor plant but it ended up looking sad and crooked in its pot.

They had tested all the boundaries with him, going on counters and clawing at furniture, messing with things they never did normally. Jisung had found the whole thing kind of funny and at the same time concerning. It made him realize just how little they saw him as an authority figure. It had gotten better after the first week, they’d calmed down significantly.

Soonie meowing and Dori perking up from his spot next to Jisung distracted him enough from the program to hear the familiar sound of the apartment door unlocking. The cats dashed out of the room, loudly screaming their “welcomes” and Jisung could hear Minho walking in with his suitcases.

“Welcome back!” Jisung called out, getting up and shutting everything down before going to help his roommate bring his bags in. He hadn’t even made it through the kitchen before Minho appeared in the doorway, shooing him away.

“Don’t come near me.”

The texture of Minho’s voice was wrong, a much lower timbre than usual.

“You’re sick?”

Jisung diverted to the fridge, bringing out a bottle of water and leaving it on the kitchen island. He remained on the other side of the room as Minho came in, his cats lovingly skirting around his legs asking for attention. Minho just hummed gently at them, took the water bottle and drank slowly before making another attempt to speak.

“Caught something on the way back…” he confirmed quietly.

Under the bright kitchen lights Jisung could easily see Minho was sick. His complexion much paler than normal and he looked kind of clammy as well, tired in a way that wasn’t just from work and travel.

“Do you want any medicine?”

“No, I took some earlier. I’m just going to shower and go to bed.”

Minho took the still half full bottle with him as he left for his room, the cats ran ahead.

“Let me know if you need anything, okay?” Jisung called after him.

“I need you to stay away so you don’t catch whatever this is.” Minho muttered before closing the door.

Jisung took it upon himself to bring Minho’s bags to the laundry room, dividing up the used clothes into color coordinated piles and hanging up what he assumed might just need to be aired out. Minho would surely appreciate not having to deal with that in the morning.

After closing the door behind himself Minho leaned back and let out a heavy sigh, closing his eyes to rest for just a minute before he took on the task of showering. His cats were talking to him and he hummed halfheartedly in response, feeling bad that he didn’t have the energy to entertain them. He’d missed them to. All he wanted right now was to faceplant onto his bed, he’d never agree to doing solo schedules like that again.

It had been a long time since he felt this kind of mental exhaustion. Too many events, too close together with too many people and his social battery was completely drained. Coupled with all the flights there had been no chance for him to recharge in a meaningful way. It had come with no surprise when his head started feeling fuzzy and every swallow came with a twinge of pain.

Minho went looking for clean pajamas before dragging himself to the bathroom. He felt gross and hoped that all he needed was to wash this day off, some sleep and then maybe a day of not speaking to a single soul.

☽ ○ ☾

Jisung yawned over the pot of slowly boiling jook, he’d woken up before the alarm which was out of the ordinary and he couldn’t remember the last time he’d made breakfast. Rice porridge might’ve been a bit overboard, maybe all Minho had was a cold, but he seemed so worn out the night before Jisung felt an innate need to take care of him.

Loud coughing suddenly erupted from Minho’s room down the hall, startling Jisung from his wandering thoughts. A few minutes later the cats filed into the kitchen followed by Minho who somehow looked worse than he had the night before.

“Good morning!” Jisung offered, which was only met with a disgruntled hum from the older. “Just morning then?”

Minho stood by the kitchen island seeming rather out of place, their normal routine disrupted. But Soondoongdori started asking for breakfast and he made himself busy.

Jisung was certain he’d lost more color overnight, even his lips looked pale.

It was with slow and sluggish movements that the dancer put out food for his cats, remaining crouched by Dori for a good while before getting up again only to sink down on one of the chairs by the island and resting his head in his hands.

Jisung served him breakfast without asking if he wanted any, putting it all on a tray in case Minho wanted to retreat back to his room. He went back to the stove and started cleaning up, did the dishes. Jisung stole glances over his shoulder, seeing Minho swallow painfully over barely a spoonful of jook. Maybe it hadn’t been such an overboard choice after all.

“How are you doing? You seem worse…”

Minho shook his head at the question, pulling the water closer and drinking almost nothing. Jisung turned away from the dishes and leaned against the sink, watching as Minho fought his way through a few more bites. Wincing with every swallow.

“Don’t you think you should go get checked out at the hospital? You’re in so much pain…” Jisung suggested.

“Already going.” Minho replied, the sound of his voice made Jisung cringe, it was gritty.

“I can take you if you want?”

“Manager is—“ whatever Minho meant to say next was cut off by a sudden cough that made him grimace with pain, carefully sipping more water.

All Jisung could think about was how it would feel to swallow sandpaper, and if that was in any way similar to how Minho’s throat might be feeling.

“Can I do anything else?”

Jisung wanted to help more, in any way he could. But Minho just shook his head and made shooing motions at him.

Stay away.

All Minho wanted from Jisung was for him to keep a distance. Whatever he had come down with had gotten so much worse overnight. He’d woken up feeling like he was choking from how swollen his throat was and getting anything down, even just water, was so painful it bordered on absurd. Minho had never eaten glass but he could imagine it felt something like this. Not to mention everything else, muscle fatigue that made his limbs heavy and achy, a nagging headache and chest that felt stuffy, throat itchy.

If Jisung caught this he’d become absolutely insufferable. Minho could take care of himself but if they both ended up sick at the same time? He’d rather not think about it. After eating what little he could Minho went back to bed till one of their managers showed up to take him to the hospital.

It was a quick visit and when Minho retuned to the apartment he dumped a bag of medication on the kitchen counter, proceeding to palm half a dozen different pills and drinking them down with water before he retreated to his room again. He’d been told it was “just a respiratory infection” and sure, it was definitely more concentrated in his chest but he felt more like he had the flu.

He changed back into his sleep clothes, t-shirt and pajama pants then the matching button-up because he felt a bit cold. He closed the curtains and left the lights dimmed then crawled into bed. Soonie was already up there sleeping and his other two furbabies were quick to join.

He didn’t think he could sleep, he was tired but not in the right way. He tried reading but couldn’t concentrate enough to follow the plot and abandoned the book for mindless scrolling on his phone as he petted Doongie who laid curled up against his side. A few times he’d felt his eyelids droop, drowsy enough for sleep but as soon as he closed his eyes the feeling passed and he was awake again. He abandoned the phone as well when Doongie crawled up on his chest for more cuddles.

After a few hours Minho had grown uncomfortable. It didn’t matter which way he laid, something still ached. He’d been given something to ease the swelling in his throat and that had helped but his chest remained congested and if he stayed in one position for too long he would start coughing. Dori had gotten tired of him tossing and had gone to lay in the cat tree instead. Doongie and Soonie had also moved to a more undisturbed distance.

At one point Minho had started feeling nauseous and it sent his heart racing, he did not want to be throwing up on top of all of this as well. But he went through his mental checklist and convinced himself he had eaten too little and maybe something in the cocktail of medication he had downed earlier wasn’t agreeing with him. He’d read the labels carefully before taking more.

Jisung hadn’t thought it would be so hard to leave Minho alone.

His schedule had been very light today and he was home again just past noon. He found Minho was back in bed with his cats.

Jisung moved restlessly from one spot in his room to the next, to the kitchen where he snooped in the pharmacy bag Minho had left there, then to the laundry room to start a load since Minho was definitely not going to be taking care of it anytime soon. At least it kept him busy for a while but then he was back to pacing around his room.

He could go to the gym or studio, at least then he wouldn’t have the physical proximity, but it didn’t feel right to leave Minho by himself either. Jisung didn’t want him to be by himself at all till he was healthy again so he called Chan, because they had production time scheduled for tomorrow and he wanted to ask to work from home. He was sure he’d be too distracted to be any kind of useful even if he went to the studio.

“Han-ah, is everything okay?”

Jisung smiled, finding it sweet how Chan’s first reaction to him calling would be to worry. They communicated almost exclusively via the group chats so whenever a phone rang it was always something urgent.

“Everything’s fine hyung. Have you talked with Lee Know-hyung?”

“He messaged earlier, said he was sick. Why?”

“Yeah uh… about the studio time tomorrow, do you think I can work from home? It doesn’t feel right to leave him by himself all day…”

“Is it that bad? He didn’t give me any details.”

“It’s like the flu or something? He could barely eat breakfast this morning his throat was so swollen…”

“Maybe he needs a trip to the hospital?”

“He already went…” Jisung paused, feeling silly all of a sudden. What was he doing? They were adults, Minho could take care of himself. “Actually, never mind. I’m sorry. I’m sure Lee Know-hyung will be fine by himself. I shouldn’t—“

“Han-ah, Han-ah, Han-ah.” Chan interrupted and when Jisung remained silent, “It’s okay.”

“Hyung, I’m really worried about him.”

“I can tell,” Chan sounded so fond. “I don’t mind you working by yourself tomorrow, I don’t think Changbin will either. You can just send your parts over when you want feedback.”

“Are you sure it’s ok?”

“Yes, it’s ok. Do you need anything from the studio? I can drop it off on my way home.”

Jisung took a moment to think.

“I left my midi controller and thumb drive in the studio, if you could bring those…”

“Sure thing. Try not to catch whatever Lee Know has.”

“He’s been isolating himself so fingers crossed I won’t. I don’t think I will… Is it really okay that I don’t go to the studio?”

“Han-ah, I trust your intuition. You looked at Lee Know and thought he shouldn’t be left on his own, It gives me peace of mind to know he’ll be looked after.”

“Ok.”

“I’ll bring your stuff by later. Just message if you remember anything else.”

“Yeah, thanks Channie-hyung.”

After talking with Chan, Jisung felt a bit more at ease. Even if the little voice in the back of his head was telling him he was being ridiculous he couldn’t with good conscious leave Minho on his own. He just had a feeling that Minho was doing far worse than he was letting on.

Much later in the evening, after Chan had stopped by with the things Jisung had asked for, Minho emerged from his room again with the cats. Jisung kept stealing glances over his shoulder from his spot on the couch, completely losing the plot of what he was watching.

He was disheartened to see that a whole day of rest seemed to have done nothing for his hyung. Same pallor, same exhausted posture, hair now a mess and pajamas rumpled in a way that made Jisung think he’d had a very fitful sleep.

The cats were being very talkative and as Jisung stole his glances Dori trotted over to him, meowing. Jisung reached out and scratched Dori behind the ears.

“Dori-yah, do you think your dad needs some help?” Jisung whispered to the cat, who seemed to agree as he looked in the direction of the kitchen. Minho had stood unmoving for several minutes and it was making Jisung more than a little uneasy. He left the couch.

“Hyung?” he spoke softly, so he wouldn’t startle Minho in case he hadn’t heard him come over.

Minho turned and Jisung saw the way he swayed, distant look in his eyes. Heart in his throat Jisung instinctively grabbed Minho’s arm to steady him.

“Minho-hyung?”

There were a few long seconds where Minho seemed to be somewhere between there and not, then he blinked and yanked his arm from Jisung’s hold, backstepping away.

“Don’t. Touch me.” He growled and it instantly put Jisung on edge. Minho never used that kind of tone with him.

“You looked unsteady,” Jisung said tried to reason, reaching out again to offer support.

“I told you to stay away.” Minho snapped at him, rearing back another step.

“I don’t care!” Jisung finally snapped back. “I’m not going to let you bang your head on the counter just to avoid whatever germs you have!”

Minho deflated, realizing he’d been a bit harsh. Staring at the floor between them he muttered an apology, “… sorry.”

Immediately Jisung felt bad.

“No, I just— Hyung, I’m sorry to. I shouldn’t have snapped at you.” He said, he should be cutting Minho way more slack. What was he doing, getting upset when Minho was clearly unwell and more sensitive than usual. He shouldn’t take anything he was saying too seriously. “Are you okay? Have you been able to get some rest?”

“I’m fine.”

The response didn’t help Jisung feel less guilty. Minho was not fine and was just saying that to put him at ease, he could still feel the lingering warmth in his hands. Minho never ran hot like that.

“I need to feed the cats…” Minho turned to the counter again, gathering the food dishes.

“I think we need to feed you to.” Jisung added, hoping to lift the mood again after the tense exchange.

“Not really hungry…” Minho had paused what he was doing again, like he was having a hard time focusing.

“Have you had anything since breakfast?”

“Water.”

“Then you need to eat something. How are you going to recover if you’re running on empty?” Jisung said. “Why don’t you have a seat and I’ll heat up some jook for you and prepare food for the kitties?”

Minho weighted his options then shuffled over to the kitchen island and sank down on a stool, resting his head in his arms.

Jisung reheated some of the jook from this morning along with chicken that he shredded into tiny pieces. After serving Minho he went about feeding the cats as well, he put out the food dishes and noticed quickly that none of them were coming over despite being very excited just a moment ago.

“Hey what’s the matter?” he shook one of the dishes to entice them. “Are you refusing food from me now that your dad’s home again?”

“Give it here.”

Jisung looked up to see Minho with his arm outstretched. He placed one of the food dishes in his hand and Minho just bent down and place it on the floor again. Immediately all three cats dove for their dinner.

“Okay. Now I’m offended.” Jisung muttered before standing back up and grabbing a cloth to wipe down the counters, not that they needed cleaning but he wanted to keep an eye on Minho.

“Is your throat better? You’re not struggling as much,” he asked, seeing Minho was eating better than he had that morning.

Minho shrugged, “they gave me something for it at the hospital,” he interrupted himself to cough, “it’s fine.”

“Do you want something warm to drink? Tea?”

“No, it’s fine.”

Jisung pursed his lips, he wasn’t getting much out of Minho, everything was just ‘fine’. If he put himself in Minho’s position he could understand why he wanted to be left alone. He had to be exhausted from all the events. Coming home to someone hovering over him, even if it was out of genuine concern, probably wasn’t something he wanted. As frustrating as it was Jisung realized he might just have to settle for providing food and space for now.

He left Minho alone with his dinner and the cats, went back to the living room to salvage the movie he’d forgotten to pause. He stayed there till he heard Minho go back to his room then returned to the kitchen, collecting the cats’ food dishes before turning in for the night.

Everything was damp and sticky. Minho felt incredibly uncomfortable as he tossed the duvet to the side and turned his pillow over, annoyed it wasn’t cooler on the other side. He was so hot, skin slick with sweat. He wanted to shower, badly, but it was in the middle of the night and that would definitely wake Jisung. His cats had abandoned him for their own beds several hours ago after he wouldn’t stop moving around.

He swallowed, throat sticky and dry which made him cough, hastily he brought a pillow over his face to smother the sound. It made his face feel even hotter and his hair was sticking to his forehead. When the cough died down he threw the pillow aside and pushed himself up so he could get his shirt off. He fumbled with the buttons, gave up after two and just pulled the whole thing over his head, he was desperate for some kind of relief, he felt like he was boiling.

As he dropped back down and rolled over on his stomach he had a fleeting thought that he should probably check his temperature. He felt weird, in a bad way. Thoughts not quite completing and actions abandoned. He wished he’d removed more of his clothes but he had no energy left to try again. He felt gross and just wanted to cool off somehow.

☽ ○ ☾

Jisung had gotten no work done all morning. He’d woken up earlier than usual to the sound of Minho coughing and was then too alert to go back to sleep. He’d set up his laptop with the equipment Chan had brought him but spent the next couple of hours completely lost, unable to concentrate enough to get any form of flow going and he uselessly jumped from one track to the next making no real progress.

Minho hadn’t shown himself at all in that time, the cats did though, screaming for breakfast in the kitchen. Jisung fed them but they wouldn’t eat. They just sat and waited. Soonie had picked a little at his food but with Minho absent the interest was quickly lost.

Jisung had started to worry, part of him hoped Minho was just sleeping, but there was that small voice again, vocalizing it’s irrational fears, which was why he was now hovering outside Minho’s bedroom door.

Minho must’ve been up at some point after the cats came to the kitchen because the door was completely closed and the cats were still outside with him. He knocked without result, not a single sound coming from the other side.

He regretted not getting permission to go in if he couldn’t get a response, but he hadn’t anticipated that Minho would close the door. They never closed any of the doors in their apartment, mostly for the cats but also because it was comforting to always be invited. Trying again, knocking harder this time he called through the door,

“Lee Know-hyung! Can I get some proof of life?”

Still nothing, he bit his lip. He could just peek inside. Minho’s bed was right in line with the door. If he just opened it a crack he’d be able to see him and if he was still sleeping he’d just close the door and leave him be. He hesitated another moment, hand on the door handle and listening hard for anything at all, he pressed down and cracked the door open just enough to peer inside.

His heart instantly lurched into his throat when he saw Minho on the floor next to the bed.

“Hyung!” he shrieked and ran to Minho’s side, dropping down and shaking him. Minho groaned and pushed him away weakly and as Jisung adjusted to the dim light he saw Minho had a pillow tucked under his head. Had he laid on the floor on purpose?

“Yah, why are you on the floor?” he asked through gritted teeth trying not to show how upset he was, his heart still hammering in his chest.

“Hot…” was all Minho responded with while moving both arms to cover his face after successfully getting Jisung’s hands off him.

Hot was right. Jisung could feel the fever radiating from him, the only other time Minho exuded that kind of heat was after full days of dance practice.

Jisung pressed the heels of his palms against his eyes and took a few steadying breaths. He was not useful if he was panicking. Once he’d calmed Jisung dropped his hands into his lap and looked over Minho more thoroughly. He was stripped down to just t-shirt and boxers, the shirt looked soaked, clinging to him. Minho’s hair was also sticking to his face and even in the low light Jisung could see the sheen of sweat layering his skin, beads collected along his hairline. It was all very clear evidence.

“Minho?”

“mhm…”

“You have a fever, have you checked it?”

“no.”

Jisung looked around for the thermometer he knew Minho had brought with him in here, found it on the bedside table. “Can I check your temperature?” he asked, starting the device. Without a word Minho obediently lowered his arms and rolled his head to the side, exposing an ear.

Jisung held his head still as he applied the device. Minho’s hair was damp, a bit crusty where the sweat had started to dry. He was so warm, uncomfortable to touch even.

The thermometer beeped, reading 39.8C (103.6F). Throat suddenly very dry, Jisung swallowed. That was too high.

“L-let me check your other ear,” Maybe he had done it wrong. Minho made a disapproving noise but still rolled his head back over to face him. The result stayed the same. “Hyung. Your fever is really high. How are you feeling?”

“Hot.”

“You’ve said that already. What else? Do you feel sick? Headache?” Jisung tried to remember all the symptoms to look out for. He shouldn’t have waited so long to check on him.

“I’m fine…” Minho sighed peering up at Jisung, eyes bleary. Jisung pressed his lips together. A fever that high was not fine at all. Should he take Minho to the hospital?

“Can you— can you tell me exactly how you feel? Everything, please?” Jisung stumbled over his words as the nerves crawled up his throat.

Minho’s gaze flicked down to Jisung’s hands wringing around the thermometer then up again.

“Hannie, don’t worry so much,” he made an effort to sit up, it was slow. “It’s a sore throat. I’m just a bit stuffy and warm?”

“Are you sure? Does your neck hurt? Is your stomach okay?” Jisung wanted to trust that Minho would tell him if he was in any real distress. He just felt so guilty for leaving him alone all morning. Even now Minho was downplaying his condition for Jisung’s benefit.

“I’m sure.”

“Okay…” Jisung tried to gather himself. “Hyung, do you think you can come eat something? It’s past noon already… maybe you could have a shower to?”

Another heavy sigh escaped the obviously exhausted dancer then, “yeah, is there more jook?”

“I’ll heat some up for you.”

Jisung waited as Minho got up, a bit wobbly but managing to shuffle to the bathroom on his own. Jisung trailed after him closely and hovered outside the door till he heard the shower turn on.

In the kitchen Jisung made quick work of getting the food prepared, it was enough for both of them and he didn’t feel like making a whole separate meal for himself. Jook was fine. He chopped up a bunch of vegetables and chicken to add to the jook while he waited.

Minho came out of the bathroom not much later, in a fresh t-shirt and shorts, his hair was still damp. He brought with him the smell of bodywash and Jisung’s shampoo.

Jisung sat in his usual seat next to Minho and the cats finally decided to eat their abandoned breakfast. Halfway through the meal he noticed Minho had barely touched his serving. He was just picking at it with disinterest.

“Still no appetite?” he asked, Minho shook his head. “Do you want to try something else?”

“It’s fine. Just—” Minho paused, gestured to the bowl. “It’s just hot.”

The fever.

“Do you want a smoothie instead? I can make one real quick!” Jisung was out of his seat already.

“No. It’s fine. You already made this.“

“And I’ll make you a smoothie if something cold goes down easier,” Jisung told Minho who just averted his gaze. “Hyung, you need to eat. Do you want banana or mango?”

“… mango.”

Minho listened as Jisung clattered around in the kitchen, slamming cabinet doors and drawers with haste. He hadn’t anticipated Jisung being so attentive, Jisung was the one who liked being taken care of, Minho hadn’t thought he’d be so eager to do the care taking.

In the old dorms Minho had always locked himself in his room till he felt better and no one would really bother him too much. But Jisung cared so much, checked on him, cooked for him, took care of his cats to, even though they weren’t his responsibility.

Minho had thought about cleaning the litter boxes when he was in the bathroom earlier but when he checked they had already been taken care of.

Minho knew Jisung had work he should be doing but instead he was looking after him, like some sick kid. Sure, maybe he had almost fainted in the kitchen last night and maybe the fever was making his brain feel like soup but he could endure that.

He felt guilty that Jisung was making him a priority when he definitely had more important things to do.

Jisung came back with a tall glass filled to the brim. He’d even stuck a straw in it. “There you go,” he set the smoothie down and pulled away the bowl of jook before sitting down again and finishing his own meal. He didn’t pay Minho anymore attention maybe clocking that it was bothering him.

Minho slowly sipped at the beverage, it was so cold and silky, felt incredible for his sore throat and definitely did wonders against the fever boiling him from the inside.

Jisung was done within minutes and cleared off the table before going to sit on the couch instead, turning on some random documentary to fill the silence.

Minho continued to work on the smoothie. Soonie had wandered over and jumped on his lap, settling down as a warm lap cushion, purring loudly.

He was starting to feel drowsy again, the effect of the shower had worn off and he was longing to return to the darkness of his room. To his bed. Looking at the glass it was still almost half-full, why had Jisung given him so much? He struggled down a few more sips then gently set Soonie on the floor and got up.

“I’m going to bed.”

“Rest well,” Jisung sing-songed to him, fully engrossed in the documentary.

“Thanks for the meal.”

“No problem.”

Minho wandered into the bathroom to brush his teeth, then across the hall and into his room. He left the door slight ajar, he wasn’t sure why he had closed it this morning, something about the lights had bothered him. He crawled into bed, quickly joined by his cats. They had also been strangely attentive since he got back from his work trip. More cuddly than usual. Maybe it was just because he’d been away for so long.

After Minho had gone back to bed Jisung gave work another go. He had to at least finish something, he’d settle for just getting past one section on any of the tracks he was working on. He needed to give Chan something to show he wasn’t slacking off. He hunkered down in his room with his laptop and microphone, headphones only on one ear so he could still hear Minho. Door left wide open. Just in case.

A couple of hours later he was standing in the kitchen again, staring at the contents of their fridge. He didn’t feel very accomplished, having only finished two sections, too distracted by Minho’s on and off coughing that just seemed to be getting worse.

None of the leftovers had been touched so it was safe to assume Minho hadn’t been up to feed himself dinner yet. Jisung wanted to make tofu jjigae, he thought if he cooked it long enough maybe Minho could eat it to. Either way he needed to get some groceries. He put together a short shopping list then headed to Minho’s room. Having a peek inside he saw the dancer curled up on the bed, his cats arranged around him like a protective circle.

“Lee Know-hyung…” he called softly, but didn’t get so much as a stir out of him, only Doongie lifted his head. “Take care of your dad while I’m gone okay?” he whispered to the cat before leaving.

Jisung wanted to pat himself on the back when he returned home again in under forty-five minutes. It had to be the quickest solo grocery run he’d ever done. Excited to get started on dinner, because he was hungry, he got to work in the kitchen.

Minho’s cats showed up as he finished up, smoothing around his legs and noisily asking for attention, begging for treats. He snuck the cats a few pieces of chicken before going to wake his sick hyung. He was surprised to find Minho’s bed empty when he peered into the darkened room.

“Lee Know-hyung?” he called and with no answer he pushed the door open further and scanned around the room. He really wasn’t in there.

“Minho-hyung!” he called louder and this time earned a low hum, coming from somewhere behind him. He turned around, trekking straight to the bathroom as that felt like the only logical place. There was no way Minho had walked past him into the living room without him noticing. Sure enough as he got closer to the bathroom he could distinguish Minho’s bare feet in the doorway.

He was on the floor again.

Jisung swallowed down the swell of panic, stay rational, he told himself. If something had happened he would’ve heard it. But his brain was already making up every bad scenario it could think of. He flicked the lights on.

Minho groaned at the brightness and curled up into a ball on the floor tiles. Jisung was just thankful there wasn’t any blood on the floor. He did not like the image of Minho getting dizzy and without anyone to catch him this time, slamming his head on any of the hard porcelain surfaces in the bathroom. Jisung leaned over him, gently tugging on his shoulder to get him to uncurl.

“Hyung, why are you on the floor?”

“Why do you think?” Minho muttered, still hiding from the lights.

“Did you get dizzy and pass out?”

Minho stiffened at the question then rolled onto his back. “No, I was warm.” He grumbled.

 The worst part about their bathroom was the tile floor and it’s broken heating. During the colder part of the year it was unbearable to step on. But Jisung could imaging it was comforting for Minho right now.

“Yeah? Have you checked your temperature? Is it better?”

Jisung offered to help him up, but Minho stubbornly helped himself and Jisung took a step back to give him space.

“Why don’t you check, then come have some dinner?” Jisung suggested.

“Yeah, ok.”

Jisung went to back to the kitchen, preparing food for the cats while waiting. It did take a few minutes and Jisung even had time to sit down and serve himself before Minho showed up.

“Your babies are still refusing my services,” Jisung said and gestured to the untouched food dishes. It didn’t go past him that they’d taken the chicken he’d treated them to earlier without protest so they were definitely scheming to get the most out of him. Minho scanned the floor for the nearest dish and just like the before as soon as he touched it the cats took the hint and went about eating. Minho shuffled over to the table and sat down, eyeing at what was being served.

“It’s tofu jjigae, I cooked it all for a long time so it’s all soft and easy to eat,” Jisung explained, “There’s leftover smoothie if you’d rather have that, I can get it for you.” He then offered. Minho shook his head and served himself, in Jisung’s eyes, a very meager portion.

“Did you check your fever?”

“It’s down…”

“That’s good,” Jisung sighed. “How are you feeling?” Minho just shrugged in response, slowly spooning broth into his mouth. As much as Jisung wanted to interrogate Minho further about his condition he knew Minho wouldn’t be any more forthcoming.

The one thing he really wanted to know was if Minho was sleeping. His cough had worsened throughout the day into straight up fits. It made Jisung cringe whenever Minho started coughing, not only because it sounded horrible but it seemed so painful as well.

“Did you get any cough suppressant from the pharmacy?” Jisung asked after a particularly rough fit where Minho let out an agonized groan before reaching for his water. Jisung had snooped in the bag already, he knew there was a cough suppressant. He just wanted to know if Minho was taking it.

Minho did nod after having a few sips of water.

“It didn’t help?” Jisung couldn’t fathom why Minho would choose to suffer like this.

“Made me queasy…”

“Oh. Why haven’t you said anything? I can get you a different one.”

“It’s not that bad.”

Jisung wanted to protest that “no, this level of self-torture was in fact very bad”. Jisung had always admired Minho’s tenacity but this was going a little too far on the side of self-destructive. Still, they were adults and if Minho didn’t want different medication Jisung couldn’t really force it on him. Even if he wanted to. Maybe he could bribe him with pudding.

They finished dinner and Jisung noticed Minho had eaten almost nothing. He’d drank a lot of the broth, even went back for seconds but most of the solid food was left in his bowl. As he cleared the table Jisung made a mental note to try and blend the jjigae into soup tomorrow. Minho definitely wasn’t eating enough.

Minho went back to his bedroom, followed by his cats who were still glued to him. Normally they would roam the apartment more but Jisung had barely seen them at all. He could relate, Jisung wanted to follow Minho around as well.

He gave work one last shot for the day, but ended up yet again fruitlessly hopping between projects and making very little progress. Too distracted by thoughts of Minho. Should he check on him? Should he go buy a different cough suppressant in hopes that Minho would take it? He considered pudding bribery again.

The coughing was terrible to listen to and of course Minho couldn’t help it, Jisung could even tell he was muffling it and that was only making him feel worse for the sick dancer. He shouldn’t have to take Jisung’s comfort into consideration.

Jisung went to the kitchen for some tea, he needed to wind down from the frustration of getting nothing done. Maybe he could finish watching that documentary before sleeping.

He was surprised to find Minho sitting in the kitchen, hunched over with his head in his hands, glass of water in front of him. Jisung’s heart twisted painfully at the sight, Minho looked miserable and small, all curled up like that.

“Hyung,” he gently placed a hand on Minho’s back. “Are you okay?”

Minho stirred under his touch, heaving a heavy breath.

“I need to feed the cats.”

His voice was almost gone, nothing but a sticky rasp. Jisung rolled his bottom lip between his teeth as he rubbed circles over Minho’s back.

“We did that already, remember? Before dinner…” Jisung quietly explained and it took a moment, a few more sticky inhales from Minho before he answered,

“oh… right.” He sounded disappointed, like he realized he’d gotten out of bed for nothing. He swallowed thickly and coughed, reaching for the water.

Jisung pouted, looked around the kitchen for something, anything to comfort his hyung with. He grabbed a spoon out of the dishrack, sticking it in the jar of honey they kept by the kettle. He made sure it had a good helping before twirling off the threads of sugar and returning to Minho, presenting it to him handle first.

“Here, take it…”

He waited as Minho raised his head to view what he was being offered. To Jisung’s surprise he took the spoon without question, even stuck it in his mouth. Jisung had thought he might have to coax him a bit more.

Jisung watched the older rest his head back in his hands with a deep sigh, the spoon handle bobbing slowly against his lips as he sucked on it.

It wasn’t like Minho had been sick for weeks, but it was still scary to witness how quickly he had declined. Even if Minho got sick more often than the rest of them he usually recovered quickly as well. This felt different and when he thought about it, Jisung couldn’t remember the last time he’d seen Minho this ill. If ever. He worried about how much he should help, how hard he could push before Minho would shut him down completely HE already felt like he was walking a very thin line between acceptable and overbearing.

“I’ll combust if you stare any harder…”

Jisung was yanked right back to reality and his gaze focused on a pair of red rimmed, tired eyes peering up at him. The spoon laid abandoned on the counter, empty.

“I was just thinking… have you been sleeping okay?” Jisung needed something to work with. If Minho wasn’t sleeping well enough they should do something about it. It felt like the most pressing issue.

But of course, Minho just shrugged.

“What does that mean? You don’t look rested. If you’re not sleeping well—“ Jisung started pushing.

“I’m fine.” Minho interrupted him.

Jisung wanted to tear his hair out or shake sense into Minho. It was all so frustrating. Minho was stubbornly independent and Jisung didn’t have the backbone to argue. Why couldn’t Minho just admit he wasn’t doing well and let Jisung take care of him?

Jisung gave up, made himself the tea he’d gone to the kitchen for to begin with. He didn’t want to watch the documentary anymore and just kept Minho company till he left his seat and wandered back to his room.

☽ ○ ☾

Minho coughed into his pillow, trying to keep the sound muffled so he wouldn’t wake Jisung across the hall. He should’ve closed the door. He’d woken up feeling like he was choking again and had been coughing since. He’d take a dry cough over this phlegmy mess any day, even if it left his throat feeling raw at least he wouldn’t feel as gross.

He coughed so hard he almost gagged. Groaned at the wretched feeling, chest drawing tight. It was like something was lodged in his throat, sticky and irritating. Like he had swallowed a piece of string and it was tickling him all the way down his esophagus. No amount of coughing seemed to be able to bring relief.

Minho pushed himself up, he couldn’t get enough air through the pillow. Lightheaded, he tried to catch his breath before it started again. His head hurt so much and he was crumbling forward as another fit wracked his body, he covered his mouth with his hands as if that could do anything about the noise. He’d been coughing so much his ribs were sore.

At the end of the next fit Minho retched, panic flaring when his stomach flipped and he vomited right into his hands. It splattered over the duvet and with a disgusted moan he scrambled to get off the bed, getting tangled in the blankets and dropping onto the floor pulling everything with him.

With no end in sight he coughed and dry-heaved and gasped for air. Time was moving so slowly, like he’d been there for hours when in reality it had only been minutes. He wanted it to stop.

Minho tried to breathe, tried to relax, tried to hold his breath to somehow stop but he was exhausted and nothing was working. His body wasn’t listening to him. He felt utterly helpless as he coughed himself into throwing up again. Barely anything came up this time. It just hurt a lot. He was so frustrated. Every muscle in his body straining.

“Hyung!”

Suddenly Jisung burst into the room, turning up the lights and dropping to his knees next to Minho. He grabbed Minho by the shoulders to pull him up from where he was almost doubled over on his knees but Minho resisted. He shrugged and thrashed, shoved Jisung away as best he could with his limited strength. Despite feeling so weak Minho still had the presence of mind to be embarrassed. He did not want to be seen like this.

Jisung wasn’t taking the hint, trying again and this time managing to catch Minho’s hand for a second, sticky, before Minho pulled away and elbowed him.

“Aish! Let me help you!” he snapped in frustration, letting his hands fall to his sides.

“Leav—“ Minho choked out between coughs.

“No.”

Minho shook his head then turned away as he dry-heaved again, inhaling sharply before starting the torturous cycle over again. Why couldn’t he stop?

Frazzled, Jisung just watched for a few agonizing seconds. He had woken up with a start and before his brain could even distinguish the horrid noises coming from across the hall he had leapt out of bed and dashed to Minho’s aid.

His first thought seeing the mess had been to take Minho to the bathroom but that wasn’t happening with Minho’s stubborn refusal to get off the floor. So instead he grabbed the small trashcan from under Minho’s desk, set it down in front of him. Minho was barely keeping himself up, hands sliding over the floor as he coughed.

“Sit up,” Jisung tried to make his tone firm. He knew Minho was embarrassed and didn’t want him there but he needed the help, like it or not. He grabbed Minho and pulled him into a more upright position, moved the trashcan closer till Minho seemed to notice, grabbing it for purchase.

“Come on, let it up.” Jisung gave a few firm slaps between Minho’s shoulder blades to help jostle loose what seemed stuck. He could hear how sticky the cough was, it was obvious something needed to come up and it wasn’t the poor meals Minho had been having. It only took a few more tries before Minho finally retched and with an uncomfortable gurgle that made Jisung cringe, spat stringy phlegm into the trashcan.

“There you go. Good job.” Jisung praised quietly, switching from the rough ministrations to gently rub circles over Minho’s heaving back.

The dancer let go of the bin and curled in on himself, wrapping his arms over his ribs, whimpering. Jisung could feel Minho’s rapid heartbeat and the trembling exhaustion as he stroked his back. He worried he might pass out if he didn’t calm down soon.

“Hyung, breathe slowly.” He whispered, doing his best not to let his own distress surface. Jisung was a little surprised he hadn’t panicking more. There had definitely been a moment where he considered calling the members who lived the closest and maybe even ‘119’.

The exhaustion hit Minho hard as his body relaxed, heartrate dropping back down and adrenaline draining. He felt empty, his abs were shot and his throat burned. Foul taste in his mouth. The only balm was Jisung’s hand on his back tracing gentle patterns, smoothing away some of those awful sensations.

“Why don’t you go wash up and I’ll take care of the mess?”

Shame filled Minho instantly, burning his eyes and nose. He didn’t want to think about how pathetic this all had to look to Jisung, bedding and floor soiled with vomit, how it was on his hands and face to. Minho really felt like a sick kid and for a brief moment he wanted to go home. Home to his parents where it wasn’t so embarrassing to be that small.

Even worse was the humiliating realization that he didn’t have the strength to stand up. His limbs were trembling when he tried to put in effort to move and he was stuck on the floor, too tired, too much in pain.

Jisung’s hand came up to his shoulder, “are you okay?” he whispered softly.

Unable to lie his way out this time Minho was forced to shake his head.

No, he wasn’t okay.

Jisung inhaled sharply, “Ok.” He breathed as he stood up, hooking his hands under Minho’s arms heaving him onto his feet. “Let’s clean you up first then…”

Jisung walked him to the bathroom, flicking on the lights and dimming them, guiding Minho to the stand in front of the sink. Minho leaned against the counter and Jisung stood close behind him, bracing his own hands against the counter on either side protectively.

When Minho made no effort to get started Jisung turned the water on and pulled Minho’s hands under the warm stream. It was enough of a prompt and with slow, sluggish movements Minho washed his hands then his face, rinsing his mouth.

While watching their reflections in the mirror Jisung saw dark stains on Minho’s top, he needed clean pajamas. He made Minho sit on the closed toilet lid before washing his own hands and handing the sick boy a towel to dry off with.

“I’ll be right back.”

He left for just a second to grab Minho a sweater and some joggers out of his closet, returning he placed the change of clothes on the counter and filled a glass with water, sticking it in Minho’s hands.

“Drink that. All of it, and get changed. Can you do that?” Jisung still felt compelled to speak quietly, as if any volume louder than a whisper could shatter the dancer to pieces. He just seemed so fragile. Minho took small sips from the glass, Jisung deemed it enough of a confirmation that he could leave for a few minutes.

“I’ll come get you when I’ve cleaned up.”

Jisung made quick work of cleaning up, wiping the sick off the floor and changing the bin liner. He picked up the dirtied duvet and blankets then decided to just change all of the bedding. He went and stuffed everything in the washer right away then fetched clean sheets, his own duvet and some more blankets to spread over Minho’s bed. As he was changing the sheets Minho’s cats came back into the room, one by one, having fled the scene earlier due to the chaos.

When Jisung returned to the bathroom he was relieved to see Minho had both managed both tasks he’d been given.

“Hyung, you can go back to bed now,” he said softly as he fished the discarded pajamas off the floor and stuffed them in the hamper. When Minho made no moves to get up Jisung helped him. Walked him back to bed and watched as he got himself situated again. The cats had been quick to jump on the bed when they saw Minho, crowding around him, chirping and purring.

“Hyung, do you think you can sleep sitting up? I think it would help with the cough,” Jisung suggested.

Minho moved further up the bed and leaned against the pile of pillows Jisung had deliberately stacked against the headboard. He adjusted a bit and kicked his feet to catch one of the blankets and dragged it over his legs, sighing wearily through his nose as he finally settled.

“Are you comfortable? Can you sleep like this?” Jisung asked, grabbing the second blanket and duvet, covering Minho with them.

“Doesn’t matter…” Minho muttered and Jisung’s chest twinged painfully. He sank down on the bed and tugged the duvet higher, gently patted it down to tuck him in. The cats had found their spots now, laying close around Minho.

“Of course it matters. You need to sleep. Do you need any medicine?” Jisung continued sadly, Minho just shook his head. “I can stay till you’ve fallen asleep.”

Another headshake.

“Ok… I’ll see you in the morning.” Jisung got up with a sigh, scratched his neck. He really wanted to stay and make sure Minho actually fell asleep. He stood there for a bit longer then reluctantly returned to his own room.

His bed was missing it’s duvet of course, but they had no shortage of extra blankets and he pulled a couple from the closet before crawling into bed. He laid there for a while, wide awake clutching his phone to his chest. Mind racing through everything that had happened. He listened to the silence till he eventually drifted off.

Minho peeled his eyes open, the ceiling light was on, had he forgotten to turn it off? He wasn’t sure if he had slept at all and was frustrated by the feeling that he felt no better than yesterday. He felt worse actually, sore all over and queasy. He found his phone, lighting the screen to check the time. Early morning. Why was he even awake? He didn’t want to be like this anymore. He was tired of the exhaustion, the ache in his chest and raw burn of his throat. His back hurt from sitting up, he couldn’t remember going to sleep like that.

He let himself fall to the side and very quickly had a face full of Soonie who’d been roused from his nap next to him. The orange kitty smoothed his cheeks against Minho’s face, purring loudly as he moved to curl up against Minho. He could feel his other two cats somewhere around his legs, heavy lumps of comforting warmth.

He laid there with Soonie rubbing against the underside of his chin till he started getting cold. He gathered the duvet and pulled it around himself and the cat. For a split second he wondered why it smelled like Jisung before memories of the previous night flooded back with humiliating force.

Minho pressed his face into the mattress and groaned, ears burning with shame. He had been so pathetic and mean. So mean to Jisung when he tried to help and he had just taken it. Helped Minho anyway, cleaned up him and his disgusting mess. He couldn’t keep going like this.

He was making this stupid illness Jisung’s problem. He had to try harder. That’s all. Eat better, take the cough suppressant even though it made him feel sick and just suck it up so he could sleep the rest of this off.

Jisung wasn’t surprised when he woke up to the sound of Minho across the hall. At least it didn’t sound like he was in distress this time. Jisung picked his phone off his chest, no missed messages from Minho but it was almost time to get up so he rolled out of bed, showered and got dressed. He went to the laundry room and moved all of Minho’s bedding from the washer to the dryer.

For breakfast he made a new batch of jook, chopped up the vegetables and chicken into tiny cubes to make sure Minho could eat it, if he even wanted to eat. Jisung worried a little about what Minho would be like today. If he would show himself at all. Jisung really hoped last night had been the worst of it, if Minho was worse again he would suggest going to the hospital again.

The jook was just about ready when the cats came trotting into the kitchen, followed by Minho, bundled up in an oversized cardigan. Jisung beamed at him, so glad he was up and about.

“Good morning,” Jisung sang softly as he brought their breakfast over to the table, serving it with freshly brewed tea.

Minho hummed low in response, watching his cats as they circled around between the two of them, looking up expectantly.

“Did you feed them?”

He gestured to his babies.

“Not yet.”

Minho nodded and after feeding his little creatures he joined Jisung at the table. He pulled the cup of tea close, drinking slowly. Jisung didn’t miss the tiny trembles rolling through him.

“Are you cold?” Jisung asked as he tucked into the meal.

“Chills… probably.” Minho mumbled over the lip of the cup.

“I know I’m being annoying, but did you check your temperature today?”

“It’s about the same…”

Jisung tired not to think too hard about it, Minho actually seemed to have more energy this morning. He was more alert and actually eating, instead of just picking at the food.

“There’s more if you’re hungry,” Jisung offered gleefully.

“I’m not…”

“You’re eating well though?”

“How else will I get better?”

Jisung beamed at him again. That was the Minho he liked, the stubbornly try harder version. He did suspect part of this effort was fueled by what had happened in the night but he wasn’t going to mention it. Minho was probably embarrassed even if he didn’t need to be.

Halfway through the meal Minho got out of his seat and went through the pharmacy bag again, gathering a few different pills in his hand and grabbing a glass of water. He stood at the counter as he swallowed down each pill, once gone he remained there for a bit.

“I’m sorry.”

Jisung blinked at him, confused. “What for?”

“I was terrible to you last night…” Minho traced circles on the floor with his socked foot.

“No, hyung it’s okay. I get it.” Jisung hurried to reassure him.

Minho nodded a few times and accepting Jisung’s response he refilled his glass and sat down at the table again.

The silence that fell was the most comfortable they’d had since he got home. Just quiet munch from the two of them and the crunching from the cats as they ate their breakfast.

But it didn’t last, soon the quiet was broken by Minho’s incessant cough. It started as a throat clearing and Minho drank water but it quickly worsened and he got out of his seat, moving away from the table.

“Hyung, are you okay?” Jisung asked, about to get up when Minho waved at him not to bother. He remained seated, eyes tracking Minho as he stepped around with one arm wrapped around his middle and the other covering his mouth. He was slowly collapsing forward with each new wave.

“Hyung, try drinking more water?” Jisung had just barely made the suggestion when Minho visibly gagged and rushed for the sink with a hand clamped over his mouth. “Hyung!” Jisung shot out of his chair just as quick and chased after, reaching Minho just as he leaned over the basin, losing what he just ate down the drain.

“I’ve got you.” Jisung steadied Minho with one hand, using the other to rub hard between his shoulder blades. Minho continued to cough and splutter but thankfully, much quicker than before, managed to cough up the mucus that was causing the irritation. Jisung gave him a moment to catch his breath before asking if he was done, receiving a slow nod in return.

Jisung turned on the faucet, thanking his past self for not leaving any dishes in the sink. Minho immediately took water in his hands, rinsed his mouth and splashed more over water over his face. Then he just stood there propped up on his elbows, breathing slow and heavy.

Jisung gently combed his fingers through Minho’s hair, pushing his bangs from his face, tucking them back before asking, “is it the coughing that’s making you throw up? Or are you actually sick to your stomach?”

“It’s the coughing.” Minho admitted, voice was terribly small. Whatever energy he’d had zapped right out of him. He looked as miserable as he had the night before and Jisung’s heart ached as he gave him a handful of paper towels to dry off with before reach for the faucet again.

Minho watched with distaste as Jisung cleaned the sink. He wanted to protest and do it himself but he was struggling to even stay upright. His abs where ruined, ribs twinging with every breath, he felt so weak.

What kind of bullshit was this? He had decidedly made an effort to get better. He got up despite his muscles screaming in protest and his brain trying to leak out of his ear. He ate even though he had no appetite and for what? Just to cough himself into gagging so hard he threw up again. He even took the pesky cough suppressant but couldn’t even keep it down long enough for it to take effect. Wasted effort.

Just then he felt another tickle in his throat and suppressed the cough that came with it, wincing as pain shot across his middle. He sank into a crouch, wrapping his arms tightly around himself to relieve some of the ache.

“What’s the matter?”

Minho pressed his lips together. He couldn’t even begin to describe to Jisung all the things wrong. How pathetic he felt about all of this. He was tired and in pain, mentally exhausted and nothing he’d done had made him feel any better. He felt utterly helpless and let a whimper slip as his ribs continued to sting and ache.

“Yah!”

Jisung’s worried voice and the water turning off, then the younger was crouching next to him, hand on his arm.

“What’s wrong?”

“-hurts…” Minho couldn’t even use his voice properly.

“What hurts? Hyung, talk to me.”

“My ribs are so fucking sore.” He ground out.

“Yeah, I bet. You’re on day three of the worst abs workout ever.” Jisung joked dryly, stroking his hand over Minho’s back.

They ended up sitting there for quite a while. Minho with his arms wrapped around and Jisung tracing soft patterns on his back. On the one had Minho wanted to squirm away and pretend it wasn’t so bad, but on the other he truly felt awful and needed the comfort.

“Hyung, do you think you can eat a bit more?”

The question felt absurd. The last thing Minho wanted was to put more food in his body that would just be rejected because apparently his gag reflex was just that weak. He lifted his head to glare at Jisung, but the rapper’s expression was set, determined.

“I’ve got some strong pain relievers I want you to take, but you can’t unless you eat something first…”

Minho cast his gaze to the floor again, contemplating the offer. The thought of eating again was not the least appealing but he was at his wits end, what else could he do? He had already tried everything by himself.

“Okay.” he mumbled weakly and was helped off the floor.

Jisung walked him back to the table and as Minho took his seat again Jisung pushed Minho’s nearly empty bowl of jook away only too replace it with his own that was still more than half full.

“Just a little bit is enough, I’ll be right back.”

Jisung disappeared down the hall and Minho quickly shoveled three spoonfuls of the jook into his mouth, trying not to think about it as he swallowed. He had goosebumps all over his skin and quickly reached for the glass of water to wash the taste out of his mouth. He wasn’t usually so squeamish, nothing felt good right now.

The younger was back in no time at all and popped two pills from a blister, cupping Minho’s hand and gently placing them in his palm.

“It’s not much but I think it can help take the edge off. They’re good for muscle pain.”

After drinking the pills down with a bit more water Minho wasn’t sure what to do. He couldn’t think properly, maybe he should go back to bed. Jisung was gently rubbing circles over his back again, it was a nice distraction, grounding somehow.

“Hey, I think— I think this has been getting a bit out of hand…” Jisung said after a moment. “I’ll go get you a different cough medicine.”

Minho needed to protest even if it was just to pretend he had some kind of dignity left. He could order it online, have it delivered by tomorrow. Why hadn’t he thought to do that earlier?

It hadn’t been so bad before.

“I can deal with it. You don’t have to.”

“Hyung, it wasn’t a suggestion. You’re not okay.”

Minho sat quietly, feeling Jisung’s gaze on him, waiting for another retort. But he didn’t have one. He knew Jisung was right, he felt bad for nothing taking care of it himself.

“Can you hang out on the couch till I get back?” Jisung then asked.

“yeah, ok.”

Minho got up and shuffled into the living room, dropping unceremoniously onto the couch and curling up on one end, laying against the armrest. He listened as Jisung cleared off the table and loaded the dishwasher. Soonie wandered in and joined him on the couch. Climbed over him and pressed his warm body between Minho and the backrest. Soonie’s deep purring vibrated soothingly against Minho’s back.

Jisung milled about the apartment for a bit before quietly coming over and setting a glass of water along with a small humidifier on the coffee table, turning it on. As he fiddled with the small machine Doongie also came into the room and Jisung helpfully lifted him onto the couch so he could cuddle up with his owner.

He pulled the throw blanket from the backrest and laid it over Minho, tucked it behind him and cooing at Soonie when he protested being jostled. Doongie had found a good spot by Minho’s feet.

“I’m going now,” Jisung announced when he was done fussing. “Do you have your phone?”

Minho shook his head, he’d left it on his bed. Jisung quickly fetched it for him, placed it next to the water on the table.

“Is there anything else I should pick up?”

“Churu.” Minho said without missing a beat.

Jisung blinked.

“Oh. Okay, I’ll get some.”

They already had cat treats. Lots of them. Minho knew this but he felt awfully guilty about not being able to play with his babies, for not having the energy to take care of them as he should. Deep down he knew he wasn’t doing it on purpose. But it still hurt him so much that his kitties were taking care of him when it should be the other way around. They’d been staying so close, not asking for attention just being there for his comfort, within his reach if he needed them.

He would spoil them rotten when he felt better again.

“Anything else?”

Jisung’s follow up brought him out of the guilty spiral and he shook his head, he couldn’t think of anything.

“Okay then, I’ll be right back. Use your phone if you need anything.”

Minho listened as Jisung left out the door, leaving their apartment silent aside from the rumbling purrs of Soonie and Doongie. It was like they were competing, they were so loud. So clingy.

Currently the youngest of his kitties was attempting to join them on the couch but seemed to lack the space. Minho shuffled back to give more room and Soonie, not wanting to be squished, moved from his spot and joined Doongie instead.

As soon as Dori got on the couch he dropped a mouthful of kibble on the cushion, nudging the pieces in Minho’s direction, meowing expectantly. He stared at Minho with his big

“Dori-yah…” Minho untangled a hand from the blanket and scratched over Dori’s ears. “You saved your food for me? Do I really look that pitiful?” he murmured, suddenly feeling choked up and swallowing thickly. He could never love his cats enough.

Dori tried again to push the pieces of food closer, making encouraging noises. Minho gathered them in his hand and placed them on the coffee table. Dori followed the motion and gave a disgruntled meow then pressed his head against Minho’s palm. Minho tried to appease him with more pets and scratches.

“I’m sorry, I know you’re worried. I’ll be fine…”

He wasn’t sure if he was trying to convince the cat or himself more. Minho cocooned himself in the blanket and curled up tighter. Jisung had told him not to sleep but he really just hoped to pass out till he came back.

Jisung had almost made it to the pharmacy when his phone rang and he hurried to pick up as he pulled into the parking lot, thinking it was Minho.

“Hi Han-ah.”

It was Chan.

“Oh, hi Channie-hyung,” Jisung was instantly guilt stricken. Chan was probably calling about work. Work he hadn’t done.

“Are you driving?”

“Yeah, well- parking… give me a minute,” Jisung gathered his thoughts, rolled into an empty parking space and turned off the ignition. “I need to pick some stuff up for Lee Know-hyung.”

“Oh, okay. That’s kind of why I called, how’s he doing?”

“Not great.” Jisung admitted, chewing on his lips again, he’d been doing that so much recently his bottom lip felt raw. He was suddenly so overwhelmed. So much had happened in just a few days, where was he supposed to start?

“Yeah? Do you need any help?”

“No. No it’s okay. We— we’re managing… You’re not gonna ask about work?”

Chan let out a fond laugh.

“Nah, I just wanted to check on you two. We figured Lee Know had to be doing pretty bad when you weren’t sending anything for feedback. We didn’t want to stress you out by asking. You know we trust you, I’m sure you got done what you could.”

“Yeah.” Jisung sighed, and while that was true he didn’t feel good about it.

“Can you tell me what’s going on with Lee Know?”

Jisung quickly rattled off every detail from the coughing to the high fever. How he thought Minho might not be sleeping and what had happened the night before. This morning and how Minho just wasn’t getting better.

“He’s really going through it, huh?”

“Hyung, I feel so bad for him. I don’t know what else to do… Should I take him to the hospital?”

“You’re doing plenty. We all know how stubbornly independent Minho is and I think you can hold off on the hospital visit for another day or two, he hasn’t been sick for that long.”

“It just suck. He’s so miserable, I want him to get better…”

“I know, and you’ve been helping as much as you’ve been allowed to. Just contact me, any of us, if you want any help or just to chat ok?”

“Yeah. Thanks, Channie-hyung.”

After picking up what he needed from the pharmacy Jisung stopped by the grocery store for the promised cat treats and some other things to cook with before returning home.

“I’m back,” he called out as he walked into the kitchen, dropping the bags on the counter. He could see that Minho was still on the couch and went to check on him.

The first thing he noticed was the trashcan that had appeared on the floor. He leaned down and gently brushed his hand over Minho’s blanketed shoulder. The older stirred, peeling his eyes open and peering up at him.

“What happened? Did you throw up again?” he gestured to the trashcan.

Minho shook his head.

“No? Hyung, what happened?” Jisung crouched down, petting Minho’s arm.

“Just in case, was coughing a lot…” Minho’s voice was so small. He seemed worse, even more listless than before. Jisung pressed his palm to Minho’s forehead, then to his own. He wasn’t very warm.

“Did the pain relievers help?”

A shrug.

“I’m sorry it didn’t do much… But I got you some new medicine to try. Why don’t you sit up and I’ll get it for you.”

Jisung scurried back to the kitchen.

While cleaning up before he left earlier, Jisung had been wracking his brain for some way to help Minho and when he’d been setting up the humidifier he got an idea. He had a nebulizer.

He had dug it out from his closet and cleaned it, left it on the counter to dry for Minho to try with the new medicine. Jisung remembered it had helped him a lot when he’d been sick a while back. It was a small thing, one of those handheld, cordless ones. He grabbed the medicine and the parts for the nebulizer, hurrying back to Minho.

The older had managed to sit up, blanket still wrapped around him and Doongie laying across his lap. Jisung plopped himself down next to him.

“Here,” he started assembling the device in his hands. “I got you the suppressant and also medicine to thin out all that mucus in your lungs, so you don’t have to cough yourself blue in the face to get it up,” Jisung felt Minho lean on him, maybe to better see what he had in his hands.

“Let’s start with the thinner, then you can take the suppressant before you sleep.” He continued explaining and held up the now complete nebulizer.

“Ever used one of these before?”

When Minho wasn’t responding right away Jisung glanced at him. He seemed dazed, eyes unfocused.

“Hey, you with me?”

Jisung passed his hand in front of Minho’s face and waited anxiously as he blinked himself back to reality. He looked at Jisung for just a second, something very fragile flashing in his eyes before he let his gaze drop again.

“I don’t feel good.”

Jisung would’ve preferred to be run over by a truck, it would’ve been less painful. Minho could’ve said that in a hundred different ways, ‘I feel like shit’ was definitely something more Minho-like and far less heart wrenching. The admission was so honest and vulnerable Jisung had to clear his throat before speaking to not sound choked up.

“Hyung, do you need to go to the hospital?”

Minho shook his head, “No. I just- I don’t—” he gave up, not even sure what he was trying to say.

“Aigo, it’s okay…” Jisung pressed their shoulders together a little firmer. “Do you want to try this?” he presented the nebulizer again. Minho gave a lethargic shrug.

“I’ve used it before, it’s easy. You just breathe.”

Jisung added the medicine to the device and started it up to remove as many hurdles as possible. A thin mist slowly began to flow from the mask.

“Here,” he held it just in front Minho’s face. “Just try it, please?”

Minho gave a nod this time but made no effort to take the nebulizer and Jisung hovered for another beat before it clicked,

“Do you want me to help you?”

Another nod.

Jisung didn’t know if he should be grateful or devastated. Allowed to finally help but only because Minho didn’t seem to be able to help himself at all anymore. He nudged Minho’s chin so he would lift his head a little higher before gently placing the mask over his nose and mouth.

“Just breathe normally, it’ll take a couple of minutes…” Jisung whispered. “Tell me if I’m pressing too hard.” He added when he felt Minho lean away slightly.

Jisung got comfortable, pulling one leg onto the couch and turning to face Minho. He threw his free hand over the backrest. He didn’t stay like that for long as Minho coughed and subsequently winced. Jisung immediately started rubbing over his shoulders then gently stroking him over the head a few times, combing through the sweat-stiff hair. He rarely got to be this gentle with Minho and it was kind of heartbreaking. Their usual skinship was always fun and playful, full of jokes and teasing.

A couple of minutes passed and he could feel Minho was starting to strain to stay upright.

“You’re all stiff, here, take it so you can sit comfortably,” Jisung put the device in Minho’s hand. “Sit back, just try to keep your chin up.” He waited for Minho to make himself comfortable then sank down beside him to scroll on his phone. Minho leaned on him again.

“It’ll make a noise when it’s empty.”

They remained like that till the nebulizer beeped and Minho handed it back to him. He left to go clean it. While washing the parts Jisung thought about making tea, but decided not to when he saw Minho had already laid back down, he just brought a fresh glass of water instead and refilled the humidifier.

“Do you want to watch something?” Jisung offered the TV remote but Minho only curled up further. “Just going to lay here then?”

He nodded.

“Ok. I’ll be in my room but let me know if you need anything.”

Jisung hovered for a moment, there wasn’t a lot more he could do, the medicine would just need some time to take effect. He also wanted to try and get some work done, feeling slightly more at ease now that Minho was taken care of.

Still, Jisung was on high alert the entire time. Bedroom door wide open to ensure he’d catch any noise Minho made. The cough did seem to improve, though there’d been one or two times where Jisung had been about to jump out of his chair and rush out because it started sounding scary.

He really didn’t want to bother him more than necessary. He was already feeling terrible and having Jisung hovering around him probably wouldn’t help.

Despite being distracted Jisung managed to get some work done worthy of sending for feedback, even if it was a day late, and once he’d done that he discovered it was past midday already. He should try and get Minho to eat something, he needed to eat to.

Minho was still on the couch. Still cocooned in the blanket but the cats had rearranged themselves. Doongie and Dori in the cat tree by the window keeping watch and Soonie plastered to his back again.

“Hyung, are you sleeping?”

“no…”

Minho’s tone was as flat and listless. No change there.

“Do you want some lunch?”

“no.”

Jisung was a little taken aback, that was the first time Minho had flat out refused. He stood awkwardly for a bit then decided to go sit on the floor by the sick boy.

“Don’t you want to top up on the pain relievers? You’re gonna need to eat something for that.”

“don’t want them.” Minho mumbled still with the same disinterest, hiding his face in the couch cushion. He hadn’t even bothered to open his eyes.

“Okay. But you should still eat something. You didn’t have much for breakfast.”

“no.”

Jisung was not above begging, so he did.

“Hyung, it’s important that you eat. So you can recover… please? It doesn’t have to be a lot, just something.”

“I’ll eat later.”

It didn’t work, Minho was even trying to compromise to make him stop asking.

“Okay, I’m sorry for insisting… did the new medicine work?”

“a bit…”

“That’s good. If- If you don’t want to eat, how about going to bed instead? Take the cough suppressant and see if you can get some sleep?”

“… ok…”

Jisung let out a sigh of relief. At least it was something.

“Alright, I’ll leave the medicine for you on the counter so you can get up at your own pace,” Jisung left for the kitchen, put out Minho’s medicine and some water then prepared lunch for himself.

Jisung had sat down and begun eating before Minho rolled off the couch and came into the kitchen. He took the medication and emptied the glass before leaving for his room. The cats had already run ahead of him, knowing exactly where to go.

After eating Jisung returned to his room to work some more, having gotten feedback from the other two racha members. He still felt the need to check on Minho, somehow now that he was making less noise Jisung felt more anxious again. But each time he peered into the darkened bedroom he found Minho curled up under the covers, him and the cat arranged slightly different each time. At least the silence could only mean he was getting some proper rest, nearly uninterrupted by that nasty cough that had been plaguing him.

Jisung waited patiently. He wanted Minho to get as much sleep as possible. It was evening and far past dinner when he decided that he should probably wake Minho and get him to eat something. Jisung reheated the jjigae he’d made for lunch and went to get his sick hyung out of bed.

“Lee Know-hyung, time to get up…” he said softly from the door opening before padding inside.

Minho was now completely hidden under the duvet, Jisung’s duvet. He was reminded of the bedding that still sat in the dryer, he should take it out. Jisung gently lifted Soonie and Doongie off the duvet then peeled it back to reveal Minho.

He was curled up on his side with his cheek smushed against a soft pillow. He didn’t look very peaceful, a deep wrinkle etched between his brows and corners of his mouth downturned. Why was he pouting?

Jisung gently brushed his knuckles against Minho’s cheek and he opened his eyes, squinting at him. Maybe he was just grumpy about being woken up.

“Did you have a good sleep?”

Minho closed his eyes again dragging a long suffering sigh, then scrunched up his face further, pouted even more as he weakly shook his head.

“No? What wasn’t good?” Jisung sank into a crouch to be closer, an odd sense of unease stirring in his gut. This felt weird.

“Couldn’t sleep.”

“Oh, I’m sorry.” Jisung moved the covers away helpfully. “Maybe you’re hungry? Do you want to try having some dinner? that’ll surely help.”

“I don’t want anything anymore—“

“W-What are you saying?” Jisung was completely taken aback by the sudden frailty of Minho’s voice.

Minho choked then tears began trailing down his face. Wetting the fabric of the pillow.

“H-hey.” Shocked, all Jisung could do was stare. What was even happening right now?

Minho whimpered sadly, untangling his hands from the blankets to cover his face. Continuing to sniffle. Jisung felt terrible sad for him and gently petted his hair.

“Aigo hyungie… Are you hurting anywhere? Can you tell me what’s wrong?”

“everything—“ Minho choked on another sob.

“Oh, oh I know. I know,” Jisung cooed, he felt compelled to soothe the sick boy’s anguish any way possible, he gently combed his fingers through his hair. “You’ve been trying so hard to get better. I understand you’re exhausted. It’s okay, it’ll be okay…” he rubbed Minho’s back as he cried into his hands, all while the cats were trying to get as close as possible, climbing all over Minho and getting in his face. They all seemed so concerned about the way Minho was acting, the sounds he was making, Jisung to.

With how this day had been going he wasn’t exactly surprised that this was where Minho had ended up. But he hadn’t imagined, even in his wildest fantasies, that Minho would cry about it. It shattered his heart to seem him breakdown like that.

Minho cried so rarely Jisung could count on one hand the times he’d been allowed to witness it. It was always jarring, in a way that made him feel guilty, because in Jisung's mind Minho was the image of stoicism, always reliable and unshakable. It reminded him that beneath all of that Minho was just as soft as he was, that beneath all that strength sat something warm and delicate.

Still, this was far from anything Minho had ever let show before. It was so raw, the complete exhaustion showing clearly in his entirely unguarded display. He wasn’t moving away or telling Jisung to leave or even trying to stop himself.

He just cried.

Jisung whispered meaningless words of comfort as he rubbed Minho’s back and petted his hair. He had a feeling Minho just needed to cry it all out.

A particularly deep sob threw Minho into a coughing fit and Jisung was quick to get on his feet again.

“Hyungie, you need to sit up,” he continued to be gentle as he sat Minho up, sinking down on the bed to offer some more solid support. Minho fell against him, hands grabbing weakly at the front of his hoodie. Jisung hastily pulled some tissues from a box on the nightstand and stuffed into his hand before he returned to rubbing over his back.

Minho managed to stop coughing, wiping his mouth and balling up the tissues. He might’ve made an effort to collect himself if he wasn’t so overwhelmed. He sobbed miserably and Jisung’s hands stilled on his back for just a moment, then he was being pulled into a tight hug.

“I’m sorry you feel so bad…”

Minho sniffled, hiding his face in Jisung’s hoodie and wiping tears and snot over the soft fabric.

“I’ll take care of you. Hyungie, it’ll be okay…”

Minho rubbed his cheek against Jisung’s shoulder, he was done being stubborn, it hadn’t rewarded him once so far.

“Is that okay?”

Minho nodded, shedding more tears.

“Okay, then let’s take a few deep breaths to start. Can you do that with me?” Jisung took slow exaggerated breaths for Minho to copy and after a few he’d somehow managed to come back to his senses. Jisung leaned back to inspect his hyung. Minho’s cheeks were splotchy, eyes red rimmed and glassy. At least the tears had stopped and Jisung pulled his sleeve over his hand to pat away what remained.

“You need to eat something and take you’re medication. Can you come with me to the kitchen?”

It felt like a gamble to ask questions again, but Minho gave a short nod and Jisung pulled him out of bed and guided him to the kitchen.

He made Minho sit at the table then fetched the now warm jjigae from the stove and set out bowls and water for them both. He served Minho first and went about getting all the medication sorted. The pills clattered softly on the table as he put them down, and he encouraged Minho to eat as much as he could before he took them.

Once they’d had their fill Jisung started clearing the table, interrupting himself to get the nebulizer and sent Minho to sit on the couch with it.

While taking care of the dishes, Jisung remembered the laundry again and after taking it all out of the dryer he changed his mind and stuffed the duvet back in, turning on a short cycle to warm it up.

When all the chores where done he finally joined Minho and the cats to watch some TV before sleeping. He tried to get Minho to pick something to watch but after the third apathetic shrug he put on the documentary he hadn’t been able to finish the other day. The only reason he wasn’t taking Minho straight back to bed was to make sure the medication could take effect, that and neither of them would feel good laying down so soon after eating anyway.

Once the documentary ended Jisung shut everything down and got up, offering Minho his hands.

“Come on, bedtime.”

He pulled Minho up and walked him to the bathroom, asked if Minho could brush his teeth, he’d be right back. It took a moment but Minho nodded and Jisung hurried to change into sleep clothes and take the warm duvet out of the dryer. He brought it to Minho’s room, pushing his own duvet out of the way and spread the warm one on Minho’s favored side of the bed. He cleaned up around the nightstand and set out a glass of water.

Going back to the bathroom he found Minho standing in front of the sink, toothbrush in hand, not even having started. Jisung helpfully took the toothbrush and loaded it with toothpaste before handing it back. Jisung brushed his own teeth while waiting for Minho.

Jisung ushers Minho back to his room, the cat already having taken claim of the warm duvet. Minho climbed into bed and dragged the covers over himself. His furbabies quickly rearranged themselves around him.

Jisung turned off the lights then climbed up next to Minho. The older stirred and peered over his shoulder, confused.

“I’ll be right here if you need me,” Jisung reassured him as he slipped under the now spare duvet and laid back against one of Minho’s many pillows.

“You don’t have to…” Minho protested weakly.

“I want to. Try to sleep now.” Jisung said, getting himself more comfortable.

Minho didn’t protest further as humiliating as it was to appear so feeble in front Jisung, he still didn’t want to be alone. He closed his eyes, tried to breathe deep and relax, invite sleep to finally come.

But there was only so much food and fuss could do, the bone-deep fatigue he felt made him too tired to sleep. His mind wouldn’t stop spinning, useless thoughts that led nowhere disrupting the peace he needed for rest.

Minho rolled onto his stomach and sank into the mattress. He was so angry at himself for letting it get so bad. If he had just accepted help sooner, even just gotten different medication when he couldn’t use the first one he was sure he wouldn’t feel half as awful as he did right now. He wanted off this terrible ride.

He felt stupid.

He drifted into the weird half-sleep haze he’d been occupying for the past few days. Not quite sleeping, not quite awake either. Brain refusing to turn off completely.

☽ ○ ☾

Minho stirred awake breath caught in his throat. He pressed into his pillow like he had so many times already and smothered the sound. It probably didn’t matter how medicated he was at this point, he wouldn’t be rid of this cough for weeks even after he recovered.

A hand swept over Minho’s back, reminding him that Jisung was sleeping next to him. The hand moved in a slow, gentle pattern over his shoulders. Minho managed to stopped coughing and he turned away from the pillow, inhaling deeply.

“You’re okay. it’s okay. shh…” Jisung sounded half asleep, voice deep and barely above a mumble. Words slurring together, repeated over and over like a comforting mantra.

And seemingly for no reason at all Minho’s chest felt tight in a completely different way and he teared up. He squeezed his eyes shut and buried himself in the pillow again, trying to will the floodgates to close as feelings he had no control over drowned him. He didn’t want to cry again, but an exhausted sob tumbled past his lips and into the otherwise quiet room.

“Hyung?”

Jisung didn’t sound sleepy anymore, in fact he was wide awake as he shifted closer behind Minho. “sorry kitty,” he mumbled as he gently moved Soonie out of the way. He leaned over Minho, hand tugging gently at him.

“Hyung, why are you crying?”

“I don’t know—“ Minho wept into his pillow, he was overwhelmed again and all he wanted was sleep. Why couldn’t he just sleep?

“That’s okay, you don’t have to know…” Jisung said softly, “turn this way?”

Minho shook his head, continued to cry into the pillow.

“Hyungie, it’s okay. come here.”

Minho felt him snake an arm under him. Then he was being lifted, pillow left behind as Jisung heave him on top of himself. Jisung shifted a little to get comfortable again.

“Hannie—“ Minho protested weakly, tried to move off him. He planted his hands and attempted to push away but Jisung held his sides and he was stuck. Minho was too weak to fight the hold, no matter how hard he tried he couldn’t lift himself any higher.

“Please—“ he sobbed, he didn’t even know what he was asking for as the tears continued to cascade down his flushed cheeks. His brain was fried, useless. Full of emotions he was too tired to sort out.

“Shh… I’ve got you…” Jisung stroked Minho over the head with both hands, cupped his face and thumbed away some of the tears before holding his side gently to support him. “stop thinking so much, go back to sleep.”

All that went through Minho’s sleep deprived mind was that he had no thoughts, only useless feeling and with a resigned sob he sagged back down, collapsing on top of Jisung.

“There you go. shh… just sleep.” Jisung hushed as Minho laid face down, trembling soft whimpers into his sweater, leaving a warm damp spot blooming over his chest.

Jisung took a slow deep breath, letting it hiss out slowly over his teeth as he considered if it would be bad if he cried a little to. He hated all of this, seeing Minho so miserable tore his heart to pieces. He knew it was temporary, Minho would get better. It was just hard to watch.

He took another steadying breath and swallowed the lump in his throat. Slowly he stroked his hands up and down Minho’s back, hoping it was soothing enough to invite sleep. The slow repetitive movements felt grounding and Minho’s weight on top of him was comforting. Minho continued to sniffle softly for a few minutes before his breath evened out and he fell silent, finally passed out and Jisung allowed himself to drift off as well.

Jisung blinked himself awake, vaguely registering the sound of an alarm going off somewhere far away. He squinted and glanced around to orientate himself, feeling hair brush against his chin. He quickly remembered where he was.

Minho’s room. With Minho on top of him.

He laid still, listening to the alarm. His phone was stuck in the charger by his bed where it’d been left out of habit, this was the first time since Minho got home that he’d woken up to the alarm.

He tried not to get his hopes up.

One night of potentially good rest wouldn’t be nearly enough for Minho to recover. But it was something small that could help. Jisung waited for the alarm to snooze itself, he had no intentions to get up and turn it off. It was quiet enough despite the open doors. Minho was sleeping, properly sleeping, breathing slow and deep with his cheek smushed into Jisung’s chest. Jisung was not going to adventure that by trying to move him.

Not when he looked peaceful.

Jisung lazily ran his hands over Minho’s back, drifting back into some sort of half-sleep.

Eventually Minho began to stir, rousing Jisung as well and he watched Minho lift his head, looking confused. Minho stared at him for a good few seconds, slow blinking.

“Morning…” Jisung whispered, a small smile finding its way onto his lips. Minho’s eyes instantly widened and he face flushed bright red as he ducked his head back down with a groan. His ears were red to.

“What’s the matter?” Jisung asked and couldn’t hide his glee.

“I’m so embarrassed,” Minho mumbled into Jisung’s sweater, making Jisung laugh and close his arms around him in a tight hug.

“Aww, what’s there to be embarrassed about?” he cooed playfully, earning a soft punch to the ribs.

“Being a complete mess.”

“Don’t’ be so hard on yourself, you’ve been having the worst time… do you feel any better?”

Minho was quiet for a moment.

“I think so…” it took him long to get the words out, still hiding in Jisung’s sweater. “Headspace if better but I don’t— I don’t feel great…”

“That’s okay. As long as something’s is better I’m happy,” Jisung said, releasing Minho when he started squirming. The older rolled off him so they were side by side instead, Soonie barely escaped being squished.

“How out of it were you yesterday?” Jisung asked as he stared at the ceiling, “do you remember anything at all?”

Minho had lifted Soonie onto his chest and was petting him as he tried to think back.

“Bits and pieces...” He said, feeling his ear go warm again, blush creeping down his neck. He threw his hands over his face. “Ugh, I’m sorry you had to see all that, please forget it!”

A lot of it was hazy, the entire day a blur with sudden snapshots and for some reason he remembered crying on Jisung not just once but twice and it made him want to shrivel up in shame.

“Never. I am going to hold this over your head the next time you’re sick so that you’ll let me help you.”

“You wouldn’t!”

Jisung grinned at Minho’s scandalized tone, happy to hear some character again.

“Of course not. But can we just agree that if you get this sick again you can’t shut me out and say you’re fine when you’re not?”

“If I had just been able to sleep it wouldn’t have gotten so bad.”

“Yeah, to think if you’d just told me to get you a different cough medicine we could’ve done something about that real quick.”

Jisung’s tone was like but the retort still felt harsh and Minho realized he was still too sensitive to play along. But Jisung was right. If he had just been honest and said something, anything about how he was doing, told him what he needed, he could’ve avoided the emotional breakdown and now subsequent embarrassment. Lesson thoroughly learned.

“I’m sorry.” It came out far more strained than Minho intended.

Jisung rolled over and laid his arm over Minho’s stomach. Traced his hand over his side as he pressed his forehead to his shoulder.

“No. Don’t apologize. You were exhausted and must’ve been so frustrated. I understand why you ended up so upset. That’s not your fault. But I would like it if you in the future tell me when you’re struggling and need help.”

“Ok.”

“Do you want breakfast?” Jisung mumbled.

“I’d rather stay here.”

“I can bring you something.”

“Please stay.”

Jisung lifted his head to look at Minho, he needed to see his expression to be sure he wasn’t missing something. But Minho was focused on Soonie, acting nonchalant as he scratched him under the chin, making kissing noises at the cat.

Jisung put his head back down on Minho’s shoulder. As he looked across the bed he spotted Doongie and Dori curled up together on his discarded duvet.

“One more thing,” he said, tugging the duvet closer so he could pet the cats. “We need to teach your babies to take food from me while you’re home. It was fine when you were away but as soon as you came back it became a problem. Even Soonie has been leaving food behind and I’ve had to bride them with treats instead to get them to eat at all.”

Minho hummed, of course his kids would try to scam Jisung into feeding them nothing but treats.

“We can work on that.”