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The pictures make The Sun in October, about a week before the Ballon d'Or gala. Jude's dragging himself out of an ice bath at the Bernabéu when the family group chat starts going off like a firecracker. At first he thinks maybe Mum's sending more of those muscle recovery YouTube videos that have dominated her algorithm lately, so he wraps a towel around his waist, teeth chattering, and trudges back to his locker before he thumbs the thread open.
Mum: Jude, call me when you have a minute https://www.thesun.co.uk/sport/7025910
Jobe: ???
Jobe: oh shit
Jobe: tbh edges looking good tho bro
Mum: Jobe please
Jobe: what, im just sayin
Jobe: stop gatekeeping ur barberWhen Jude clicks into the link, the bottom of his stomach drops out completely.
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