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It started small.
They were in the lab like usual, Grace looking at something or another through his microscope. It didn't matter to Simon at that moment, as he sat in the chair opposite the man. He stretched his body out, yawning, face to the tile ceiling.
"You almost done, babe? Getting reeeaalll sleepy over here." He called.
There was no reply, which was usual. His boyfriend often got lost in his own head tuning everything out except the equations and problems in front of him. He moved his head down to face Grace, who had turned towards the whiteboard marker in hand, but stood unusually still. Weird. It wasn't like him to be still.
"Babe?"
Still no response. Simon rose to his feet and approached Grace quickly, a slight anxiety to his movements.
Grace leaned heavily on the white board eyes closed, head twitching, and breathing slightly erratic. His free hand was on his chest, rubbing rough circles into it.
"Ryland!?" Simon, called again concern coating the name. It was here only, inches from Grace's personal bubble, that words seemed to register.
He watched the man's eyes open, blinking unevenly and slowly, baby blue and unfocused. They had trouble meeting his face and when they did Simon couldn't help but notice how dilated his pupils were.
“Fucking shit.” Simon thought, reaching a hand out to softly cradle the face now in front of him. “Did he somehow hit his head without me noticing??”
"H...hey…S…Si." He eventually breathed out in a greeting, rubbing his cheek against Simon's calloused fingers. Simon noticed his breathing was a little easier and the hand had stopped circling his chest.
"Hey, Angel. You alright?" He replied, reaching out his other hand to take the marker from him and cap it quickly. He took a moment to adjust his hands, moving to take Grace into a supportive embrace. He currently looked like a light breeze would knock him over.
Grace nodded, eyes still hazy.
"Mhmm, m'tired.." he replied, slurring his words together and slumping forward a little.
Simon took a step back the sudden weight throwing him for a second.
"Is that it, Ry? Just sleepy?" He questioned fingers running up and down the taller man's spine. He couldn't help but worry about the twitching muscles and slight tremor in Grace's frame.
"Mhmm." Was all the reply he got before Grace fully slumped forward.
"Whoa-hey!" Simon exclaimed, catching him with a start, having to place a foot back for balance again. Shaking his head in bewilderment, he kneeled slightly and slipped one arm under his boyfriend's knee and his other on his back, angling it to where Rylands face laid on his shoulder and slightly under his chin.
"Tree, you're ridiculous. When was the last time you got good sleep?" He chuckled to himself, kissing the sleeping man's forehead.
Grace was easy for Simon to carry, if but a bit lanky. He'd even been able to dead lift the man over his shoulders before he had been gifted the xenonite arm.
Which had been a point of concern he thought Ryland had been fixing.
Shifting the man a little in his arms he turned to the white board to see what Grace had been so involved in. He took the equations on a section at a time. It was slightly familiar, one he realized he'd seen Grace work on before. He sighed heavily.
"The food problem. Of course. You've been working on that since I boarded the ship six months ago. Is this why you haven't been sleeping?” He whispered to the sleeping man in his arms. Humming to himself, he turned slowly to look at what was under the microscope
It was Taumoeba.
Huh.
Why would that be back as a study sample? Grace and Rocky had assured him the solution to the star problem had long been figured out by the time he got here.
He chewed his lip. He had questions, but with his own tiredness creeping back up and the irregular rise and fall of Grace's chest concerning him, he decided they could wait. He turned slowly and walked out of the lab and down the hall to the sleep bay, where Rocky was already waiting for them.
>Grace okay, question?< Rocky's voice triled out.
"Yeah, I think so bud." Simon replied unsure, kneeling down and laying Grace on his side of the shared bed.
>mhmmm worry worry worry. Grace heart beat irregular, statement. Body tense. Will watch both sleep tonight< Rocky chirped back with a small stomp.
Simon shrugged. He was so used to the watching ritual by now.
"Thanks buddy." He replied. He fiddled with his prosthetic, taking it off to sleep. Finally laying himself down next to Ryland, cradling the man in his grasp.
"Night, Rock. Watch Grace more than me, kay?" He mumbled half asleep already, not even registering the aliens reply.
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Simon truly believed it had been an accidental head hit and lack of sleep. He'd been enforcing a stricter bed time since then, and hadn't seen anything out of the ordinary in nearly two weeks.
Of course things were never as simple as that. That be too easy for him, and Gods no, he could never have something easy.
They were alone in the 'Don't Go Crazy Room' when it happened again.
Grace was teaching Simon about weather patterns, something he had been surprised to hear about. There had been no weather on Eden. Just the constant nothingness of dimming stars and artificial station lights. Closest to rain they ever got was in the Tree dome, when the sprinklers would go off and nourish the large plant.
They stood together on the railing, hands clasped as Grace talked to him about something he called the rain cycle. Simon knew how much he missed teaching and thus it had been his idea for Grace to teach him about Earth.
They both loved every second of it.
"So as I was saying, water vapor then travels back up into the sky and joins together. When the droplets the vapor form get too heavy they fall back down again, and the cycle repeats. Usually during what Earth calls its summer months–when the sun is shining a little brighter–is when the most rain happens." Grace taught excitement in his tone.
"What happens after the rain?" He asked back, staring at the monitor in front of him.
Grace had set it to play a gentle rainstorm. The sound was repetitive and comforting.
"Mhmm, depends on the region." Grace mused. "Sometimes if there's too much it can overflow rivers and lakes leading to light flooding–we'll cover natural disasters later, don't worry. Sometimes it can cause fog, which is a giant cloud-like blanket that covers the ground. More commonly though, " he paused and fiddled with the monitor controls before pressing a button. "the sun will hit the remaining water droplets, causing light to refract and create a rainbow."
The screen in front of him and Simon changed and presented the brunette with one of the most beautiful things he'd ever seen.
He stared in awe for a moment before noticing another change in the room. Beside him Grace had gone rigid, eyes staring wide at the image on the screen.
"S–S–Simon?" He squeaked, chest rising and falling rapidly now. "I...can you....turn this off? Im sssorryy." He panted, letting go of his hands and leaning forward on the bar in front of him.
Simon moved quickly to the controls somehow getting it back to the comforting rain sounds before sprinting back to Grace, hovering near his side.
"Grace, sweetheart, what's wrong?" He said breath shaky.
"Flashback...God I'm so..stu..pid. I...I forgot, the last thing...." he stopped, took a pained breath, and continued. "....earth before sedation was–" he cut himself off with a gasp, spine straightening with an uncomfortable cracking sound as a tremor shook through him.
"Fuck, Ryland!" Simon yelled, his voice wavering as he placed one hand on Rylands lower back, his other gently under the man's armpit, turning the man to face him, helping better support his weight.
In front of him Ryland wheezed, his head twitching from side to side and eyes darting frantically filled with a panic that hit Simon like a punch. This was a much worse scene than the lab weeks ago.
He braced himself, leaning more of Rylands weight on himself as he felt the man's body tense again under his hands. He was left with nothing to do but watch as Grace's chest arched forward, his spine now in an impossibly sharp C curve. His glasses falling backwards off his face. A silent scream trapped in his open mouth.
He had seen flashback induced panic attacks before. Fuck he had dozens of his own. Whatever this was, was different. Rylands repetitive twitching, hard sharp breaths, and shifting unfocused eyes, terrified him.
"Fuck, Ryland?? What is this, what's wrong??" He asked panic making the words sour on his tongue.
Simon moved the hand holding Rylands back further up into the man's shoulder blades, wincing at how tight the muscles were. He started slowly rubbing small circles into them, hating how useless he felt. Hating that this was all he was currently able to do to try and help the man he loved so dearly.
"stressphysicalization" was the one word response he was given before Grace's body convulsed again harder this time than the last.
"Fuck, Grace—I don't know what that means!" Simon cried, now completely panic-stricken.
Grace didn't answer—couldn't answer—and that scared him more. He searched the twitching face above him for answers and saw only a light blue tinge to Grace's lips. Grace's body was still rigid, seemingly trapped in a spasm, chest not moving.
"God dammit Ryland!" Simon yelled, slapping a regrettably forceful palm to his chest.
The slight pain seemed to have worked as he heard a ragged breath release from the man he held within his own trembling arms. It didn't last long though, as he felt another tremor start up.
"Grace, I'm so sorry if I hurt you, but I need to know what's wrong. I'm gonna carry you to the med bay. Mary and Armando will know what to do. I'll –fuck babes–I'll be as gentle as I can. I'm sorry for hitting you. Just try and breathe for me? Okay?" He watched as the man above him tried and failed to nod, noticing the wince of pain across his features the movement brought.
As gently as he could he scooped Grace up in his arms, tears escaping him freely at the slight moan of pain he caused the other to make.
He ran as steadily as he could on wobbly legs to the med bay, screaming Rocky's name.
He heard the xenonite ball rolling before he saw it and quickly shouted out to him:
"Rocky, prep the med bay! I–오, 나무여, 내게 축복을 내려주소서—I don't know what's wrong!" He sobbed.
Rocky said nothing in return, running ahead of
them. By the time he had made it to the bay Rocky had done what he asked. The bed was lowered and Armando hovered nearby. He could see Mary's medical bay lights and body scanners ready to go.
"Okay, Ry. Gonna put you down now. Mary's got you, don't worry." He mumbled into the blonde's locks, setting him down with a slight grimace.
All he got in return was another hard shaky breath as Rylands body arched his chest forward again.
"Fu....fudge" Ryland panted, eyes springing open in pain. His face was slick with tears and Simon moved to wipe them before being stopped by Mary's voice.
"Full body medical scan now starting. Please stand back." The robotic female voice called.
Simon forced his legs to take a step back, anguish gripping him as Rylands arm stretched out in search of him. He was left only to watch Mary scan the convulsing body, working in tandem with Armando who had moved Grace into an uncomfortable looking sitting position, removing his shirt off and over his body to apply electrodes. Three to his chest, two to his head.
Once applied Armando gently laid Grace back down, his eyes now shut uncomfortably tight. Simon noticed the tinge of blue was darker on his lips. He saw a mask descended from the ceiling next, carefully applied by the medical robot. He didn't know if it would help, his hand still lingering with the feeling of the slap, but Gods he hoped.
The screens of the medical bay lit up with the patches, monitoring heart wave and brain activity. Simon didn't know how to read them but Mary did.
Thank the Tree, Mary did.
“Initial scan finished.” Mary's voice spoke. “Heart rate is highly elevated. Brain activity is normal. Oxygen deployed to help breathing rate. Diagnosis: unknown.”
The words hit him like a brick.
“Unkown? Mary, what do you mean? You're supposed to know! You're supposed to tell me how to help him. What am I–” he was openly sobbing now. “What am I meant to do now?” He asked hopelessly.
He felt Rocky's xenonite ball hit his knee and looked down. Rocky's chittering was sad and worried.
>Rocky Simon find fix. Rocky Simon must fix.<
“Need more information to form a proper diagnosis.” Mary replied.
It was then Simon remembered.
“Grace said something to me before,” he gestured to where Grace laid, body still twitching but breathing seemingly easier. The tinge of blue thankfully lighter but not gone. He swallowed hard before continuing. “Before he went catatonic, he said something….어 뭐더라…stress physicalization? Does that help at all?”
Mary's operating system hummed. There was a quiet moment then only broken by the beeping of monitors and the sound of Rylands head shifting against the pillows. Then Mary beeped.
“Stress physicalization is a process where emotional or mental worry turns into real body signals, making the brain send stress chemicals like cortisol and adrenaline through the body.”
“And that would cause him to seize like this? To not breathe properly? Is he so overly stressed that his body is forcing a shut down?” Simon asked, approaching the bed where Grace laid now that the scans were done. He watched the tremors, weaker now but still fucking there, move along the body below him. He brushed his thumb along the worry lines of his lover's face, soothing them with soft circles.
“It's a possibility. Given the information you gave and the readings that I am getting of the Dr, my current diagnosis is PNES, a form of functional seizures. Seeing that there's no brain related activity spiking, it's the current fitting diagnosis. Attacks can be brought on by physical triggers, environmental stressor, or past traumatic events.” Mary replied.
>Is fix, question?< Rocky chirped, rolling to stand by Simon.
“My sources show that Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is often useful. Unfortunately it's something the ship is not equipped for.”
“Of fucking course its not.” Simon snapped.
He ran a hand over his face and sighed.
“Sorry, Mary. Didn't mean–I'm sorry. You've been more than helpful.”
“Of course. If you need more tests run do not hesitate.”
They were left then, the body scanner going back to its place in the wall. There was silence between himself and Rocky for a while as they watched Grace's body finally still.
>Grace heartbeat go to sleeping pattern, Statement.< Rocy said.
“Thank the Tree. His body needs the rest.” He brushed the bangs out of Rylands damp face.
He thought for a while over what Mary had told them, his mind circling one thing in particular: environmental stressors. He thought back to the first attack he saw and the equations on the board, the food problem, the taumoeba….
The taumoeba!
“Hey Rock. I have a question…”
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Ryland stayed in the med bay for a week after his last attack. Mary had kept a timer running and from the time Simon had laid him in the bed to the time Ryland had finally fallen asleep had been ten minutes. Not including the time Simon had carried him.
Even if Mary had said there was no issue with Rylands brain, “she” still wanted to monitor the man. Grace's heart rate was still jittery, seemingly unable to settle. It was worse at night. His heart rate would quicken, alerting Simon and Rocky to his trembling form. Simon would place a hand on him, soothing out the muscles and working to settle him. It was never enough for a full attack. Just enough to keep them all on edge.
Simon thought having the diagnosis would help him. It didn't. Mary had officially labeled them as non epileptic, and Grace when he was awake referred to them only as stress physicalizations.
Rocky and Simon had tried to work the problem together with limited success. The taumoeba could be used as a reliable food source. However neither Simon or Rocky knew how to do that. They needed Grace. They needed their scientist. With a sigh he turned the corner.
Ryland was sitting up in the med bay, glasses low on his nose reading a textbook when Simon knocked on the wall. He looked up, eyes bright and smiling.
“Hey Si. What's up?”
Simon moved to stand by the bed leaning down to kiss the top of Grace's head.
“How are you feeling?” Simon asked, sitting himself down in one of the chairs they had brought from the lab.
“Ive been telling you for days, I'm fine.” he replied, setting the book down in his lap. “I'm mostly bored. I want to be back in the lab, working on…on..” Grace shifted, not meeting Simon's eyes.
“The taumoeba?
“Yeah. How'd you know?” Grace asked, face meeting Simon's again.
Simon sighed, and looked up at the ceiling.
“Remember in the lab? A few weeks ago? You said you were just tired but…but I'm pretty sure that was a smaller attack. A smaller seizure, that is.” He stopped and looked at Ryland then. His face was solemn as he listened. “Do you remember anything from that day?”
Grace hummed. “A little. Its fuzzy? Like trying to remember a dream. I remember being in the lab with you, working on…..on….” His eyes closed and his heart monitor beeped rapidly.
“Hey hey hey,” Simon reached his hand out to grab Grace's which had begun to tremble slightly.
“괜찮아요, 당신은 괜찮아요.” His thumb rubbed circles into the back of Rylands hand. They stayed like that a moment, until the trembling subsided and Grace took a deep breath.
“You were right, if you were wondering. Taumoeba can be used. Rocky and I, we've been trying to figure it out for you. We've hit a road block though. We–”
Grace's hands pulling him forward cut him off. Lips crashed together as the blonde kissed him, deep and reverent. When they finally broke apart, they were panting slightly. Simon had to fight the urge to seek out more.
Grace spoke then.
“You…you finished the problem?”
“Sorta? We more proved your hypothesis right. We, well Rocky and I are only engineers, Ry. We need you for the rest of it.”
Ryland moved then, swinging his legs off the bed to stand.
“Whoa–hey! Mary said no sudden movements you have–”
“Simon. If I spend one more day holed up in this bay, I am going to lose my mind. Now please, I want to go to the lab. I want to help.”
His peremptory tone of voice made it clear to Simon there'd be no changing his mind. Simon sighed and moved to help the man up, catching his lips in a soft kiss as he did so.
“Just, don't stress out too much, okay?” Simon spoke when he pulled away. “Let Rocky and I help you.”
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It was months later when it happened again.
Ryland, Rocky, and to a smaller extent Simon had fixed the taumoeba into a source of micronutrients edible enough to stretch out until they reached Erid. Ryland said it reminded him of an Earth food called chia seeds which Simon had no reference for but believed him.
What mattered to him about the situation was the problem was gone and Rylands attacks had diminished. Only the occasional issue at night when sleeping, but they could handle that. So when he heard Rocky's xenonite ball rushing towards him, and the panicked chirping, Simon was utterly unprepared.
>Simon! Help statement! Happen again, but Grace fall! Bad bad bad!< Rocky chirped circling around the man.
The cup Simon was holding fell out of his hands and onto the floor with a clatter. He moved to follow Rocky, who had stopped his circling and was going out the door of the sleep bay.
“What do you mean fell, Rock??” He asked, sprinting behind the alien.
>Grace Rocy grabbing things from storage and talking, suddenly Grace go still and stop talking. Heart rate elevates, let go of ladder. Bad bad bad.<
Simon felt his own heart rate increase. If Ryland was having another seizure he did not need a head wound on top.
>Rocky wait here. Go down help< Rocky said, stopping suddenly as they reached the ladder down to storage. Simon took a peak down and wished he hadn't. There at the bottom lay Ryland, flat on his back, eyes shut tight, tension tight in his frame. It made him want to puke. He took a settling breath before climbing down the ladder.
When he reached Ryland, he fell to his knees and gently touched the man.
“Hey baby you there? Rocky said you fell?”
Rylands eyes snapped open at the contact and his eyes met Simons.
“I…..uh…Si.” A pained breath slipped through his parted lips as he struggled to answer. “I…uh yeah just…from the fourth rung, not….not far.”
Simon only hummed and let his fingers roam over Rylands scalp checking for any bumps. He made a mental note to have Mary check anyway when his searching brought up nothing.
“Ryland you're going into another attack, sweetheart. It's gonna be okay. I'm gonna be here the whole time. You wanna tell me what you and Rocky were talking about? They said y'all were talking and then your heart rate elevated?” Simon gently picked up Rylands hand and gave soft kisses to the beating pulse he felt in the wrist there.
“We....we were talking about....oh god” Ryland squeezed his eyes tight again as the first tremor started. He licked his lips before speaking again. “Family. I uh…I-I…..I remembered them.”
Simon put his hand down gently and turned into one of the clothing storage bags around them and pulled out a folded sweater. He then gently lifted Grace's head and slipped it under, hopefully providing a smidge of comfort to him. He picked the hand up again, this time rubbing small circles into the palm.
“Who Angel? Who'd you remember?” Simon thought back about the past times he and Ryland had talked about family. He knew that both of his parents were dead like his own, but when Simon had talked about his own “brothers” Grace's face would always twist in a way that seemed like he was missing something. He knew what the answer was gonna be.
“My brothers. Simon, I-fudge,” a sharp intake of breath and an arching of his spine. “Simon, I had brothers. More than that-I..I was a twin” Ryland cried tears staining his face. His breath was becoming more uneven and harsh.
“Oh sweetheart. Shhh, it's okay. Just breathe for me please.” Simon comforted, kissing his pulse point again before his hands moved up to Rylands shoulders to rub out some tension he saw there.
“No, it's....it's not okay. I lost contact with them both. Court was CIA and Colt was…was...oh god his accident–” Rylands head thrashed against the faux pillow as the memories came flooding in. “He was a stunt man. Had a bad accident, we didn't talk but I know he was alive. How could I– it wasn't by choice but–Stratt,” a deep breath and another full body tremor at the name. “Stratt had to know about them? Right? She said I had no family, she presumed them dead but did she even check??” Grace's spine was arching off the ground again as his panic spiraled, words rushing out before a pained inhale.
Simon's hands moved in larger circles as he watched Ryland below him. He took a minute before speaking.
“I don't know Angel. I know your feelings towards Stratt are complicated, you just have to trust she had her reason. But Tree, Ryland, I'm so sorry. I need you to try and relax for me though.”
“Icant!” came the pained reply as Rylands back finally relaxed back to the ground.
He was full on convulsing now and Simon hated it. He knew all he could do from this point was wait and offer comfort. Rylands breaths were getting shorter and more pained, coming out in short wheezes that made Simon wince. He moved a hand down to Rylands chest.
"나를 위해 숨 쉬어 봐, 자기야. 내가 곁에 있어. 괜찮아." He said softly rubbing small circles into the chest below him, humming slightly as Rylands muscles tried to relax, and he heard a shaky inhale.
"There you go Angel, good job. I know it hurts but can you take another one for me?" He looked down at Ryland then holding his eyes with his own and watched as tears ran from his eyes.
"F...fudge. Si-," Ryland tensed again slightly as he spoke, fighting to do what was asked. "...ithurts."
"I'm so sorry, my love. I'm here. You're doing great. Focus on breathing, we'll work through this. You're doing great." Simon comforted, his right hand never leaving the man's shoulders, continuing to try and work out knots and smooth muscles.
“I….I don't," Ryland let out a pained whine as his body went taught with a spasm once more. He fought to breathe through it while continuing to reply. “.....believe you.” He panted, his eyes shutting as he shifted his head back and forth on the sweater below him.
There was a quiet then. As much quiet as could be given in a room with a seizing man that is. Simon laid his hand flat on Rylands chest, mentally counting for breaths and gently pushing down when it was time for an exhale. His mind swam.
Butcher
Convict
Ours
He shook his head and the script changed.
Lover
Starlight
Mine
He took a breath, keeping it in pace with the rhythm he had set for Rylands.
“I'll accept being called anything you want.” He whispered. “But am I really a liar, you think?” he spoke gently, hand never stopping the small up and down movements.
There was another small silence, as Rylands body fought to relax further. Tremors trailed off slowly and he watched Rylands face slowly relax. He felt the man take a slow steady breath on his own, his head still giving an occasional twitch.
“No.” Came the breathy reply, as Ryland finally opened his eyes again to meet Simon's.
Simon slowly moved his hand off the other's chest now, seeing the breaths become steady. He moved his face down to Rylands, and softly kissed the tears that still gently rolled off his face.
“Then believe me.” He whispered. He gently moved to pick up Rylands arm, giving soft kisses to the muscles there as he helped Rylands body manually relax, moving the elbow joint slowly.
Beneath him Ryland let out a sob, curling himself up into Simon's lap. Simons let him lay there, slowly lowering the arm to instead rub circles into the man's frame. They stayed like that for a bit, until Simon's hand was getting sore and Rylands sobs turned into small hiccups.
It was Simon who spoke first.
“I'd…I'd love to hear about them. When you're ready of course.”
Ryland only nodded, still tucked deep into Simon's stomach. Simon knew he was always tired after an attack, but add the shock from the fall and the exhaustion that comes from crying, it was a wonder he wasn't already asleep.
The fall. Crap.
Simon gently shook Rylands shoulders.
“Hey now. No sleeping. You still did fall you know, even if it was a short distance I'd rather get you checked by Mary before you sleep.”
A deep sigh resonated from the man below him.
“Mfine, Si.” Came the muffled reply a moment later.
“Mhmmm, still. It would help me feel better. So please, Angel?”
Simon felt the huff of hot air on his skin and felt the slow movements of Ryland unwrapping himself to sit up. Once they were face to face again Simon leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss on the man's lips.
“There we go. Come on. Up the stairs, I'll follow behind. Also I'm pretty sure if we don't come up soon, Rocky will have a fit.”
>Rocky do no such thing!< came the reply from above, emitting a chuckle from the two men as they slowly got up and moved towards the ladder.
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“Ryland, oh my god, Ryland stop you're smothering me” Simon laughed half-heartedly squirming away from Grace's grasp.
Grace had him in a tight embrace and was covering his face in sloppy wet kisses. A huge smile on his face.
“I just can't help it, Si.” Ryland replied, leaving another kiss along his jaw. His right hand trailing up to gently caress the teeth along Simon's cheek. He felt Simon squirm under the touch.
“Ryland careful don't want to nip ya” Simon said gently trying to move his cheek away.
Ryland replied in the only way he knew how and moved to kiss the mouth there. Simon gasped under him.
“Ryland!?”
“It's like I was saying Si, I can't help it. You're so beautiful. I just want to eat you up.” He placed a myriad of kisses on his cheek. Starting from the secondary mouth, along the teeth, and moving down to the jaw once more. He felt Simon still.
“I…I don't believe you” Simon said, a hint of sadness in his voice. He knew he didn't think of himself as attractive anymore. His mutated form was still a sight for his own eyes to take in. He didn't know how Ryland could stand to look at him. They were a sign he had survived but, Tree, the ugly scars on his face, the extra elongated teeth? Beautiful would never be a word he'd describe himself as.
He felt a tap at his temple and looked up. Ryland had stopped his attacks and now held his head with both his hands.
“Hey where'd you go big guy?” Ryland asked, forcing his eyes to meet his own.
Simon huffed and felt the teeth on his cheek slowly ripple along Rylands hands at the movement.
“I just…I don't believe you. When you call me beautiful, that is. I mean look at me.” He replied, hating the way his voice trembled a bit.
Ryland leaned back then with a face of scrutiny. His eyes roamed up and down the man in front of him.
“Hmm.” He hummed. “I am looking Simon. Have been for months now. Now, I'll accept being called anything you want–a coward, a savior, your Angel–but am I really a liar, you think?”
Simon's eyes narrowed. Grace, the ever loving asshole he could be, was using the words he had said months ago against him now. And he had the audacity to be grinning like a sly fox about it all too, like he knew he had already won. Which they both knew he had.
Simon huffed. “You've got such a shit eating grin for a man I could snap like a twig.”
“Yes I know,” Ryland replied leaning forward to kiss the tip of his nose. “But that doesn't answer my question does it?”
Simon let out a sigh and nuzzled his toothy cheek into Rylad's hand and replied,
“....no. I've never thought of you as a liar, my Angel.”
“Then believe me.” Ryland said, leaning forward once more to capture Simon's lips with his own in a soft embrace.
And so he would. If Grace believed in him enough that he allowed him to help in the darkest of moments, who was he to deny Ryland the belief in his statements.
If their one and only shared constant is their shared belief in each other, Simon was sure they would be able to make it through anything else life had to throw at them.