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Evan Buckley woke to warmth. Not sunlight, not exactly.
Though pale morning light was beginning to creep through the half-closed curtains, soft and drowsy like it had decided to sleep in too.
No, the warmth was deeper. Closer. Human.
Eddie.
Buck didn't move at first. Didn't breathe too deeply. Didn't dare let reality shift too quickly around him, afraid that if he wasn't careful, something would change, and he'd open his eyes to an empty bed and the quiet ache of almost again.
But the mattress beneath him dipped just slightly toward the right, where another body lay mere inches away.
The sheets were tangled around his waist, one of Eddie's legs draped lazily over his, anchoring him in place.
A slow, steady breath ghosted across his chest. There was the faintest rasp of stubble brushing his skin where Eddie's cheek rested against his shoulder.
God. He was really here. Eddie Diaz, asleep in his arms.
Officially his. Finally his.
Buck exhaled quietly, blinking fully awake as the world settled into focus.
Eddie's room. Eddie's bed. Eddie's scent, clean soap and cedar and something warm and inherently him.
The ceiling overhead was familiar now, a place Buck had woken beneath dozens of times before after movie nights or long shifts or late talks that blurred into accidental sleep.
But this was different. This time wasn't accidental.
This time, Eddie had kissed him goodnight on purpose.
Buck turned his head slightly, careful not to disturb the man sleeping beside him. Eddie was lying half on his chest, one arm flung over Buck's middle like he'd simply reached out in the night to confirm he hadn't dreamt it either.
His hair was mussed from sleep, a stubborn strand resting over his forehead. His lips were parted just slightly, soft and unguarded.
Buck's heart twisted.
How many mornings had he imagined something like this?
How many nights had he lain awake in his own bed across town, staring at the ceiling and wondering what it would be like to reach for Eddie like this, to wake up with him tucked against his side like it was the most natural thing in the world?
He had pictured it in flashes. A hand brushing his. A sleepy smile.
Whispered 'I love you's' drifting into the quiet.
But he had never let himself imagine it could feel like... this.
Like peace. Like arrival. Like home.
Buck swallowed past the lump forming in his throat.
He couldn't help it, his fingers moved on their own, brushing gently along the side of Eddie's arm where fine hairs caught the light. He traced up from his forearm to his shoulder, marveling at the subtle strength beneath skin.
Eddie didn't stir, only shifted faintly, pressing closer into Buck's chest with a soft sigh.
Buck froze, then melted.
Was it possible to dissolve and combust at the same time? Because he was pretty sure that was what was happening.
Every nerve ending in his body was awake, alive, humming with the knowledge that Eddie was his, not in assumption, not in hope, not in painful longing, but in truth.
His boyfriend.
He nearly laughed at the word, giddy and disbelieving.
Boyfriend.
Eddie Diaz, firefighter, father, steady as the earth itself, was his boyfriend.
The word didn't feel big enough.
Buck tipped his head back against the pillow, staring at the ceiling again, but all he could see was the night before.
The quiet conversation in the dim light of Eddie's room.
The hesitant admission, 'I love you. I've been in love with you.'
The way Eddie had breathed, Me too, like he'd been holding it in for years.
And then Eddie reached for him. No hesitation. No doubt.
And Buck had gone willingly, gratefully, into his arms.
They hadn't rushed anything. No desperate tearing of clothes or frantic hands. Just slow, reverent closeness. Touches that said finally and I'm here and you're safe with me.
Buck could still feel the lack of space between them last night when Eddie had pulled him close beneath the covers, holding him like something precious.
Eddie had kissed him like Buck was something holy.
He blinked hard now, moisture prickling behind his eyes.
If someone had asked him years ago what heaven would look like, he might've said something about clouds or eternal peace or maybe a beach with perfect weather and endless time.
But lying here, Eddie breathing steadily against him, the quiet weight of his arm over Buck's chest, the distant tick of a wall clock somewhere in the hallway...
He wasn't convinced heaven could do better than this.
How could anything be better than waking up to Eddie Diaz tangled up in him?
He turned his head, just enough to take in Eddie's face from this angle. His eyelashes cast faint shadows on his cheeks. His brow was relaxed, mouth soft.
An angel.
Buck scoffed lightly at himself. Cheesy and ridiculous, but true.
Eddie Diaz, stubborn, grounded, sometimes frustratingly controlled, but fiercely loyal and endlessly patient, was the closest thing to an angel Buck had ever known.
How had he gotten so lucky? What had he possibly done right in this life or any other to deserve this?
His throat ached with it. His chest squeezed tight, too full. He wanted to kiss him again.
Buck swallowed, his gaze dropping to Eddie's lips. Just a small kiss. Something featherlight.
He could do that without waking him, right? Just one more, to anchor himself, to make sure this was real and not some cruelly vivid dream.
Gently, so gently, he leaned forward, tilting his head just slightly to brush the barest whisper of a kiss against Eddie's forehead.
Eddie shifted.
Buck froze like a kid caught stealing cookies.
But Eddie didn't wake, only nuzzled his head further against Buck's collarbone, his fingers curling instinctively at Buck's side.
Buck released a breath he didn't realize he'd been holding. A smile tugged at his lips, soft and uncontrollable.
He stayed like that for a long moment, simply watching him. Memorizing the rise and fall of his chest. Counting the freckles on his shoulder. Cataloging every detail like he was afraid time might take it from him if he didn't hold tight enough.
A faint sound drifted from down the hall, the creak of house settling or maybe the distant hum of the refrigerator.
For a brief moment, Buck thought of Christopher, still asleep in his room. The thought wasn't alarming. Instead, it sent another wave of tenderness through him.
Christopher was here. In this house. In this family. And now Buck was officially part of that.
Would they tell him today? Tomorrow? Would Christopher even be surprised? Kids saw things adults missed.
Christopher had always looked at Buck and Eddie like they were already a matched set.
He'd figure it out. He probably already had.
Buck shifted his hand slightly, letting his thumb stroke over the dip of Eddie's waist, the warmth of his skin beneath the rumpled t-shirt he'd never bothered taking off last night.
Buck had lost count of how many times he'd imagined this exact scenario. And yet living it, breathing it, was so much better than anything his mind could've conjured.
He was so lost in the quiet bliss of it that he almost didn't notice when Eddie stirred.
It started with a deeper inhale, his chest rising more prominently against Buck's. A faint sound, not quite a groan, more of a sigh, rough with sleep.
Then Eddie's fingers flexed slightly where they rested over Buck's ribs.
Buck tensed instinctively, unsure if he should pretend to be asleep or if that would be incredibly stupid. He decided on simply staying still, heart hammering a little faster.
Eddie shifted again, his head lifting just a fraction from Buck's shoulder. His brow furrowed slightly before his eyes blinked open,slow and disoriented as his eyelashes fluttered like he was fighting the lure of sleep still tugging at him.
Buck held perfectly still, barely breathing.
Eddie's gaze was unfocused at first, staring somewhere at Buck's chest. Then, slowly, it traveled upward, across his collarbone, up his neck, to his face.
Their eyes met. And for half a second, neither of them spoke.
Then Eddie squinted slightly.
"...Why are you looking at me like that?" His voice was rough with sleep, words slurred ever so slightly. There was a faint chuckle in there, amused despite his sluggish brain.
Buck blinked, caught. Heat flooded his face.
"I–" He stammered helplessly, a laugh bubbling up in embarrassment. "I wasn't– I mean, I was, but not in a– I was just..."
Eddie's mouth curved into a lazy smile, one corner lifting higher than the other.
"Morning." he murmured.
Buck's heart stuttered.
"Morning." he echoed, voice soft.
"Well?" Eddie tilted his head slightly, amusement deepening in his sleepy eyes. "Are you gonna answer?"
"Answer what?" Buck swallowed.
"Why are you staring at me like I hung the moon." Eddie mumbled, another chuckle escaping him as he shifted onto his side a little more, propping himself up just enough to look at Buck properly.
Buck stared at him.
There were a thousand things he could say. He could joke. Deflect. Tease. But he didn't want to hide. Not now. Not ever again.
"Because I love you." he said simply.
Eddie blinked.
Buck continued, voice gaining steadiness as he spoke.
"Because I woke up and you were here. Because this feels like–" He hesitated, searching for words big enough. "Like magic."
Eddie's expression softened.
Buck swallowed again, his throat thick.
"I don't understand how heaven could ever be better than this." he whispered.
Eddie stared at him, eyes dark and unreadable for a moment. Then they crinkled at the corners, that soft smile he only ever gave Buck blooming fully.
"Cariño." Eddie murmured, the word low and warm.
Buck's breath caught.
"You're gonna make me cry first thing in the morning." Eddie reached up and brushed a thumb along Buck's cheek, slow and reverent.
"Join the club." Buck's voice was rough when he spoke.
Eddie's chuckle was quiet, but it vibrated through both of them as he leaned in, closing the inches between them to press a gentle, lingering kiss to Buck's lips.
Buck melted instantly.
It wasn't rushed. It wasn't heated. It wasn't anything other than pure affection, soft and slow, like it had all the time in the world.
Eddie's hand cupped his jaw, thumb brushing just below his ear.
Buck's fingers found their way into Eddie's hair, carding through the messy strands carefully, like he was afraid to break the moment.
When Eddie finally pulled back, he hovered close, foreheads nearly touching.
"Better than heaven, huh?" he teased quietly.
"I'm not wrong." Buck huffed out a laugh.
"Can't argue with that." Eddie hummed.
They stayed like that for a moment, breathing the same air, neither willing to move too far away.
Then Eddie shifted, settling back down but this time pulling Buck in closer, tucking his head against Eddie's chest.
Buck went willingly, curling into him like he'd been built to fit there.
Eddie pressed a kiss to the top of his head.
Buck's eyes fluttered shut. He could stay here forever.
And if the world outside their little cocoon never called them out, if they never had to leave this bed again, he'd be perfectly fine.
Buck nestled against Eddie's chest, listening to the slow, rhythmic beat of his heart. It was steady, grounding. Familiar in a way he couldn't put into words.
He'd leaned against this chest before, during late-night movie marathons when he dozed off halfway through The Sandlot, during quiet moments after tough calls, during the aftermath of nightmares when Eddie insisted Buck stay just a little longer.
But this was the first time he did it knowing, truly knowing, that he was allowed to. That he belonged there.
Eddie's fingers absentmindedly combed through his hair, slow and repetitive, like he was memorizing the shape of Buck's skull.
Buck felt his entire body unwind, muscles releasing tension he hadn't even realized he was holding.
For a long moment, neither of them spoke. They didn't need to.
The silence between them wasn't empty. It was full, full of everything they hadn't said, everything they had said, and everything still waiting to be said.
"You know..." Buck let out a soft breath. "I used to think I wasn't built for this."
"For what?" Eddie hummed above him.
"This." Buck said, gesturing vaguely between their bodies. "Us. Being... happy. Being loved like this."
"You think you don't deserve it?" Eddie's hand stilled briefly in his hair before continuing its slow strokes.
"I think I've spent so much of my life waiting for the other shoe to drop that sometimes I don't know what to do when things are actually good." Buck gave a helpless little laugh.
"Hey." Eddie's chest rose beneath him.
Buck tilted his head up slightly to meet his gaze.
"No more waiting for shoes to drop. Okay?" Eddie's eyes were soft but firm. "We're not doing that anymore."
"What if I mess it up?" Buck swallowed.
"You will." Eddie said plainly.
Buck blinked.
"And I will too." Eddie's lips curled.
Buck huffed out something like a laugh, caught off guard.
"We're going to screw up. We're going to say stupid things. We're going to have bad days." Eddie continued, voice steady. "But we're not going to run from it. Not anymore. Because we're in this. Together."
Buck stared at him, emotions crashing over him like a wave. He didn't know how to respond except with the truth.
"I'm so in love with you." he said, raw and unfiltered.
"Good." Eddie's face softened even further, something fragile flickering in his eyes. He dipped down and kissed Buck's forehead, lingering there. "Because I'm so in love with you too."
Buck squeezed his eyes shut, letting those words settle into all the places inside him that had gone cold long ago.
They warmed quickly, thawing under Eddie's voice like frost under sunlight.
"We should probably get up soon." Eddie shifted slightly after a moment, his brows furrowing. "Before Christopher wakes up and comes looking for us."
"No." Buck's eyes fluttered open, and he pressed his face back into Eddie's chest with a helpless groan.
"Buck–" Eddie chuckled.
"Nope. I refuse." Buck tightened his hold around Eddie's waist. "New house rule. No leaving bed until at least noon."
"You're gonna tell that to a kid who wakes up at six for fun?" Eddie snorted.
"He's your kid." Buck grimaced. "He can learn."
"You plan on telling him that when he walks in here?" Eddie laughed again, warm and real.
Buck hesitated.
Eddie raised an eyebrow.
"Fine." Buck sighed dramatically. "10 a.m."
"Seven-thirty." Eddie countered.
"That's basically night." Buck gasped.
"It's light out." Eddie gave him a look.
"Barely." Buck pouted.
Eddie reached down and pinched his side lightly.
"Hey!" Buck yelped, squirming.
"Don't test me, cariño." Eddie's grin was mischievous.
Buck's heart stuttered again at the word.
"Say that again." He shifted, propping himself up slightly so he could look at Eddie properly.
"What?" Eddie blinked.
"Cariño," Buck said softly, the Spanish word rolling clumsily off his tongue.
Eddie's expression warmed instantly.
"Cariño." he repeated, slower this time.
"Yeah." Buck melted. "That."
"You like it?" Eddie reached up, brushing his fingers along Buck's cheekbone.
"A little." Buck nodded, unable to keep the smile from his face.
"Just a little?" Eddie smirked.
"Maybe a lot." Buck shrugged.
"Good." Eddie's thumb traced over his lower lip.
They fell quiet again, simply looking at each other.
Buck didn't know how long they stayed like that, suspended in the kind of moment people wrote songs about.
"When do you want to tell him?" he spoke again, voice soft.
Eddie didn't need clarification. They both knew who he meant.
"Soon." Eddie's eyes flickered toward the door for a moment, then back to Buck.
"Today?" Buck asked.
"Maybe." Eddie considered. "If it feels right."
"He probably already knows." Buck nodded.
"Probably." Eddie huffed a quiet laugh.
"Do you think... he'll be okay with it?" Buck's gaze grew distant.
"He loves you, Buck." Eddie's hand found Buck's again, threading their fingers together.
Buck's throat tightened.
"He's always loved you. This won't change that." Eddie paused. "If anything, I think... I think it might make him happy."
"Yeah?" Buck blinked against the tears stinging his eyes.
"Yeah." Eddie smiled.
"I want to be good for him." Buck let out a shaky breath. "For both of you."
"You already are." Eddie said quietly. "You always have been."
Buck exhaled, the weight of years of uncertainty easing a little more.
"You're family, Buck." Eddie squeezed his hand.
Buck's vision blurred fully then. He closed his eyes, pressing his forehead to Eddie's chest once more, breathing him in.
"I've wanted that for so long." he whispered.
"It's yours." Eddie's arms wrapped around him, strong and secure.
Buck let the tears fall silently, not out of sadness but out of overwhelming, uncontainable love.
They stayed like that for a long time, wrapped up in each other, unhurried.
Eventually, Buck's tears dried, replaced by a quiet smile he couldn't wipe away even if he tried.
"Are you ready to get up?" Eddie shifted slightly beneath him.
"Never." Buck groaned.
"Come on." Eddie chuckled. "Coffee?"
"Only if you kiss me again first." Buck hesitated. Then, reluctantly, he pushed himself up onto his elbows.
"You're impossible." Eddie rolled his eyes fondly.
"You love it." Buck grinned.
"Unfortunately." Eddie smirked.
Then he leaned in and kissed him again, soft, lingering, and morning-slow.
Buck sighed into it, feeling the world tilt back into alignment around them.
When they finally pulled apart, Buck rested his forehead against Eddie's one last time.
"Yeah," he whispered. "I could do this forever."
Eddie smiled against his skin.
"Good," he murmured. "because I'm not going anywhere."