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Karen Wheeler has never been the type of person to invade her children's privacy. She encourages them to talk to her about stuff, but she doesn't push them to talk about it. If she's cleaning their rooms and finds something she shouldn't have, she leaves it alone.
For the most part...
She couldn't help but be curious when she was cleaning Mike's room and found the diary she gave him a few years ago open on his desk. She read a few words and was instantly intrigued.
At first, she left it alone, because she knows it's wrong to snoop.
Though, for the past week, it's been all she can think about. Those two words that she caught a glimpse of.
"My boyfriend."
She's cleaning Mike's room again, because Will's been staying over for the past few nights. The two have finally gone somewhere else, but not before making a mess of the room. There are snack wrappers everywhere, and it's clear that neither of them understand what a laundry basket is.
As she passes Mike's desk, she can't help but notice the diary again. It's not like he'll know if she reads it... Right?
Whatever, it's fine.
She grabs the book from the desk and sits down in Mike's desk chair, then flips to the first page.
Entry #1: 8/7/1985
Dear Diary... God, this is stupid. Mom, why did you get me this? Why?
I guess I should talk about school. I started highschool today, and it was okay, not much different from any other year. Of course, science is great, except for the fact that I don't sit next to Will.
Me and him have started talking again since our fight. That was the first time we ever fought, and it was torture. I never want to see him upset again.
There's this cool older guy that invited the Party to come sit with him during lunch. I think he's a super senior, but that doesn't matter. He runs the D&D club, and the Party is considering joining. I think we will– I'm tired of DMing all the time.
I feel so bad that Will kept asking to play D&D all summer and I kept saying no. If I could go back, I'd say yes every time.
Karen doesn't think that this is too odd. Though, she isn't too happy about the fact that her son was hanging out with a super senior in his freshman year.
She hadn't realized that Mike and Will had a fight. That's weird for them.
What was it about? She'll never know.
The fact that Mike kept declining when Will asked to play D&D is unusual as well. Usually, that's all he wants to do.
Entry #2: 8/12/85
The Party ended up joining Eddie's D&D club. It's called Hellfire, which I know Mom's gonna hate, but it's still really cool.
We're all gonna make T-shirts tomorrow, and they're gonna match the ones that the existing members already have. I'm betting that Will's is gonna look the best, since he's an artist and all. I might even have to get him to make mine...
Some older kid teased me about my scar today. He asked if I got it from running into a pole, then he ran straight into a locker! Hah, instant karma.
While the Party was laughing about that, Will told me that my scar is cool, and I shouldn't worry about the mouth breathers. He said it makes me look like "a real life, honest to god, paladin".
God, I love him.
Wait! Not like that. You know, just in a completely normal best friend way. Platonically. Best friend.
I really need to shut up sometimes.
This entry is kinda weird. Mike was very insistent about the fact that his relationship with Will is platonic. Did he not know that you can say you love your best friend and mean it platonically?
It almost seems like he thought it sounded like he meant it in a gay way, even though he clearly didn't.
Maybe it's from all the bullying he went through when he was younger? It seems like he was still being bullied in freshman year, so it's not unlikely.
Karen finds it cute how Will told Mike that his scar makes him look like "a real life, honest to god, paladin". She doesn't really know what that means, but it sounds cute.
Mike also wrote about Will being an artist and how he thought Will's Hellfire shirt was going to turn out the best. Karen thinks it's sweet how he's always been so supportive of Will's art hobby. To this day, Will's art is hung up all over Mike's room, including a very nice painting hung over his bed.
Entry #3: 9/27/85
It's been awhile since I've written in here.
Will told us today that he's moving next week. Him, Jane, Jonathan, and Joyce are all moving to California.
For as long as I can remember, the Byers' have lived across town. Now they're going to be living across the country.
I'm going to spend as much time with Will as I can this week. I kinda abandoned him this summer when I was spending all my time with Jane. Not to say that I'm not going to spend plenty of time with her, too. I just need to spend more time with Will.
I'm not sure how I'm going to live without him. He's always been by my side, and that time that he went missing was torture. Not only for him, but for me as well. He's been my best friend since forever. He's been with me through everything, and he's stayed.
It's almost like he's my life line. I don't know why.
Not in a gay way! I have a girlfriend! I'm not gay!
Karen remembers when the Byers' moved to California and how heartbroken both Mike and Nancy seemed. Neither of them talked to anyone for a whole week, and when they finally did talk again, it wasn't much.
She also remembers the week before, when it seemed like Will was at the Wheeler's all the time, and when he wasn't, Mike was with him at the Byers'.
It's also definitely true that the week Will went missing was heavy on Mike. The boys have been best friends since forever, and it truly is like they are eachothers life lines.
Mike also seemed pretty insistent that he's not gay. Almost like he was... denying it.
Entry #4: 10/5/85
Will moved yesterday. It was so weird to see a house once so full of life, entirely empty. The ruins of Castle Byers are still there. It still bugs me that I upset him so much that he destroyed his safe haven.
Without him and Jane here, I just feel so empty. Lucas and Dustin are great, but they're not Will. Or Jane. Max kinda hates me, and that's justified.
Honestly, sometimes it surprises me that I even have any friends at all. I'm such an idiot. I've hurt all of them at some point or another. Will and Jane worst of all.
I promised them both that I would write them letters, so I guess I should get on that.
It's strange how Mike wrote "Will moved" instead of "The Byers' moved". He was– and is– close with all of them, but Will leaving seemed to hurt the most, as well as Jane.
Karen also didn't know that Mike and Will's fight was so bad that Will destroyed Castle Byers. From what she knew, that was his safe place. She remembers when Mike and Will were younger and they used to beg to stay the night in there. Of course, they were never allowed, because the woods are way too dangerous for two kids to stay alone at night.
Towards the end of the entry, it starts to seem like Mike hated himself. He was wallowing in guilt for hurting Will and Jane. Karen doesn't know what he did, but it seems like it was pretty bad.
Entry #5: 11/1/85
I have a problem. I've been able to write letters for Jane no problem. Except I can't really bring myself to write... you know... "I love you".
I've signed them all "From, Mike" instead of "Love, Mike".
Maybe that doesn't seem like such a big problem, but it is! She's my girlfriend and I can't even say I love her.
However, all the letters I write to Will end with "Love, Mike". I can't stop myself from writing it, even though I know it's wrong.
I haven't been able to send him a single letter because I keep accidentally saying too much. I keep revealing stuff that I can hardly admit to myself. Well, not admit, because it's not true! I swear it's not! I have a girlfriend.
All of the unsent letters are underneath my bed, in an old shoe box. I can't bring myself to look at them, but it also feels wrong to just throw them away.
What's wrong with me?!
This sent Karen through a rollercoaster of emotions. She thinks that part of the reason Mike can't say "I love you" is because he never hears her and Ted say it to eachother. But then he wrote that he can write to Will.
He clearly thinks it's wrong, but there's nothing wrong with loving your best friend. The problem is that he can't say it to his girlfriend.
Karen really wonders what Mike kept revealing that he couldn't admit to himself. Something that was clearly not true, and he could prove it wasn't by saying that he had a girlfriend.
What could that possibly be? Maybe she'll find out later.
Hopefully Mike has learned that there's nothing wrong with him.
Entry #6: 12/25/85
I'm so inconsistent about writing in here. I don't really have much to say. Well, I do, but I think it's better if I just keep it in my head. Imagine if someone found this...
Anyway, today was my first Christmas without Will here. At least, that I can remember. Obviously there were Christmases without him before we met.
But Christmas is supposed to be about family, right? Well, my family is way too invasive. Nana kept asking questions about my girlfriend, but I realized that I didn't know how to answer most of those questions.
Not when they were about Jane. If they were about Will, I could answer them without thinking.
I recognized his breathing through a walkie talkie. Is that crazy? It seems pretty crazy.
I promised him that we'll go crazy together, but he's not here to go crazy with me. I'm going crazy and I'm all alone.
I've got my family, and Dustin, Lucas, and Hellfire club, but they're not Will. They wouldn't go crazy with me.
I want Will back.
This one has tear drops on the page. As if Mike couldn't help but cry while writing it.
Karen remembers that her mom was bugging Mike with a ton of questions that Christmas. She wanted to know everything about Jane. Karen hadn't even met the girl back then.
Apparently, Jane is Will's long lost twin– but that was just a fake story. Mike explained everything shortly after Karen had to fight off those "Demo-dogs" in the hospital. Jane was raised in a lab, and she has powers. She accidentally opened a gate that led to an alternate dimension called the Upside Down– which is where the Demo-dogs and Demogorgons are from. When she opened the gate, she let out one of these creatures, and that's what took Will when he went missing in 1983.
Jane is actually a very nice girl, but Karen only met her after she broke up with Mike. She has no way of knowing what their relationship was like– mostly because Mike never talks about it.
It's sweet how Mike promised Will that they'd go crazy together. The two have always been inseparable, and it doesn't seem like that's ever going to stop.
Karen genuinely shed at tear when she read that last line. It had hardly been two months, and Will being gone was clearly like a tear in Mike's heart.
Entry #7: 1/1/86
"Happy New Year," they all say. Well, I'm not happy.
School starts back in a few days, but Highschool sucks. Lucas has been so focused on basketball, and he promised that he wouldn't do it for a second season, but then he went back on that promise and signed up to play for the second half of the year.
Dustin really only talks to Eddie and Steve. Steve keeps giving him free movies from the video store, and Eddie lets him help plan campaigns.
Max still hates my guts, so that leaves me all alone.
How are you supposed to make friends in highschool? I could hardly make friends in kindergarten, so it's unlikely that I'll make any in highschool.
All friend groups have already been established. I thought that mine was fine, but then Will and Jane moved, Max stopped talking to anyone, Lucas joined basketball, and Dustin clearly doesn't care about us anymore.
I really wish Will was here. Truthfully, he's always been the one to keep the Party together. I'm our "leader", but he's the glue. If he were here, he'd know how to make everyone talk again.
Jane wrote a letter and told me that California is nice. Apparently Will's working on a painting for someone he likes. He's never made me a painting before. Why should a random girl he likes get one before me?
Maybe he's made a new best friend. Maybe they're a replacement for me. Maybe that's why he never writes. Maybe that's why he never answers when I call. He's busy talking to them. He doesn't care about me anymore. Clearly no one does.
Karen had thought that the kids stopped hanging around at the Wheeler's house because they were at Hellfire club or whatever. It turns out that they just weren't talking.
She knows that Mike's had trouble making friends. He'd probably never make another friend if the Party hadn't started talking again. He's the type to not even try, because he doesn't think he'd be able to.
It's a bit strange that Mike was jealous that Will was making a painting for someone he liked, but at least he has a painting from Will now.
He put that painting up after he returned from California. Apparently it was from Will.
Was the painting that Will made for someone he liked the same painting that he gave Mike?
Did he like Mike like that? Or had Jane just been confused when she said it was for someone Will liked?
Entry #8: 2/14/86
Last week, I sent Jane a Valentine so that she'd get it today, on Valentines day. But I still couldn't write "Love, Mike".
I don't know why I'm still having this problem. It's so frustrating! I should be able to say that to her. She's my girlfriend. That's what people say to their girlfriends.
Not their best friends.
I couldn't stop myself from writing one for Will, too. Of course, I didn't send it, but I still wrote it. I'll never repeat what I wrote in that Valentine, but I signed it "Love, Mike".
It's not normal to write a Valentine for your best friend. Especially not when you write that you love them. I know it's not normal. That's what the mouth breathers have always said. Dad's said it, too.
It's not normal, Michael! Get that in your head! You don't love him! You can't love him! You're supposed to love Jane, so love her.
Stop being jealous that he's making a painting for some girl he likes! You have no reason to be jealous! Of course he was going to end up liking a girl at some point! And he's an artist, so of course he's going to make her a painting! What did you expect?
Why would he give you a painting? He has no reason to! Obviously it's supposed to be a romantic gesture.
We're just best friends. That's all we'll ever be, and that's all we're supposed to be.
That's a lot to unpack. Again, there are tear drops on the page.
It's sweet how Mike wrote Jane a Valentine and figured out when to send it so that it'd arrive on Valentines day. He wrote one for Will, too, but he seems to think it's wrong.
He kind of admitted that he was in love with Will, even though he was denying it. Why would he deny it if no one else had brought it up? He's trying to convince himself that it's not true.
Karen's starting to put the puzzle pieces together. Mike did like Will. He was in love with him, even. She's still not entirely sure if the painting really was the same one as the one that Will made for the person he liked, but hopefully she'll find that out soon.
Entry #9: 3/21/86
I finally get to visit Will and Jane in California! I'm going tomorrow, but I am not going to bring this journal/diary. I don't write in it often, but I've written enough that it would be incriminating if someone read it. Especially if that person was Will or Jane.
It's been months since I've seen them, and I'm really excited. Dustin and Lucas have started talking to me more again, and they're good, but they're not Will and Jane.
I'm a bit worried since I haven't heard from Will since the move. I was never able to bring myself to send any of the letters I wrote, and the line was busy every time I tried to call.
Maybe he really did find a new best friend. I wonder if he's finished that painting yet. Has he started dating the girl that he made it for? I kinda hope not. I'd be happy for him of course, but there's this part of me that would be jealous, wishing it was me instead.
Jane wrote in a letter that she's enjoying California. She seems to really like the beach, and she loves being a part of the Byers' family. I'm happy for her, but I'm a bit worried that she's noticed that I've signed all my letters with "From, Mike".
Hopefully by the end of the week I'll still be alive to write in here about it...
Karen remembers that Mike almost didn't get to go on that trip. It's clear now that he really needed it, but at the time all that mattered was his attitude. The week before the trip, he had been a bit of a brat, and it nearly made Karen and Ted consider getting a refund for the plane ticket.
Now, she's glad that he got to go.
She's glad that Dustin and Lucas had started talking to him again, but it's clear that he needed Will. She doesn't know what happened on that trip, but Mike seemed happier after coming back. Obviously he was stressed about Hawkins splitting in four and he was grieving a friend who had died in the "earthquake", but he seemed lighter with Will around.
In this entry, there are some crossed out lines, but she can still read them. Mike admitted that he wanted to be the one that Will was dating. It's crystal clear by now that he liked Will– or possibly still does.
It seems like he was faking his relationship with Jane without her knowing. That might be part of the reason that they broke up. Karen really hopes that he apologized.
Entry #10: 4/2/86
We returned to Hawkins a few days ago. Yes, we. As in me, Will, Jane, and Jonathan. Joyce was still in Alaska– (I'm not supposed to talk about why)– but she returned with Hopper and Murray the next day.
Hawkins split in four due to an "earthquake", and some stuff happened in California (again, not supposed to talk about it), so we couldn't stay there. The Byers' are now staying with us, Joyce in the guest room, Jonathan in the basement, and Will in my room. Jane is living with Hopper at his cabin
My trip to California was pretty bad, and I kinda messed up. I said some stuff that I shouldn't have, because I was trying to deny my feelings for Will, but I apologized. I'm such an idiot, because I forgot his birthday. It's been nearly ten years. How could I forget?
Jane got mad at me for not being able to say "I love you" and she broke up with me for it. We talked about it the other day– spent a good few hours just taking. I've come to terms with the fact that I like Will, and I never really liked Jane like that. I explained it to her, and she was upset, but she does support me, so that's nice.
As it turns out, she didn't really feel like she loved me either, and we decided we're better as friends. She didn't understand why some people think it's wrong for a boy to love another boy, so I had to explain that... It was pretty awkward.
Will gave me a painting when we were in that Surfer Boys Pizza van on a cross country road trip. It's a really good painting, and I can tell he spent a lot of time on it. He said it was from Jane, and he was telling me that I'm "the heart of the party" and that Jane will always "need" me and that she "loves" me and stuff like that.
I don't know why he lied. He also never mentioned the painting for the person that he likes (liked?) so I think we really need to talk.
It should be easy to talk now that we share a room, but who knows.
Mike has finally come to terms with the fact that he likes Will. He still seems pretty confused, and he clearly doesn't have the full story.
Karen doesn't either, and she's still pretty confused. She doesn't quite understand why Mike wasn't supposed to talk about some of this stuff. Could it have something to do with the Upside Down?
It's strange that Mike forgot Will's birthday, but it's true that he had a lot on his mind. At least he apologized.
Karen is glad that Mike talked to Jane. It seems that they ended on bad terms, but they talked about it afterwards. He should feel guilty that he put Jane through all of that, but he shouldn't beat himself up about it– they were kids.
Will gave Mike that painting and he gave him a whole speech about "Jane's feelings", but it turns out that Jane never actually felt like that. What if there was not another painting? What if the painting was meant for Mike all along?
She can only hope that the two talk about it.
Entry #11: 4/7/86
It's my birthday, and Hawkins is officially in quarantine. We're not supposed to leave our houses for extended periods of time because of all of the stuff coming out of the rifts. The government is trying to patch them up, and I have opinions about that, but I don't think I'm supposed to say anything that I want to.
We mostly stayed indoors today, and I didn't get many great presents from my family, mostly just a bunch of clothes from Mom. I'm probably not even gonna wear them, so they might just end up as Will's.
Dustin, Lucas, and Jane came over to hang out for a bit, though. Jonathan let us hang out in the basement to watch movies like old times, so of course we watched Ghostbusters for the hundredth time.
The Party all got me presents, which I greatly appreciated. Even Will got me one, even though he just gave me that painting a week or so ago. I told him that the painting was enough, because he clearly worked hard on that, but he insisted that I take the present, and who am I to say no to Will?
We still haven't talked like we should have, but I hope that we will soon. I wish I knew the right words to say, and I really hope he doesn't think I'm weird for basically being in love with him.
There's not much to say about this one, other than the fact that Mike admitted to being in love with Will. He'd previously only said that he "liked" Will, but now he's using the word that takes courage to say.
He's clearly fine with the fact that he likes guys– specifically Will– even though he denied it for so long, thinking that it was weird and wrong. He still seems a bit nervous about it, which is completely valid.
However, Karen knows that Will would never be the type to judge Mike for that. If he did, then he wouldn't be the same boy that she thought she knew after all these years.
Entry #12: 4/12/86
Me and Will finally talked this afternoon. It took a good few hours to figure everything out, but he likes me back! The painting he gave me was the one for the person he likes– aka me, Michael James Wheeler– and I told him that I had a feeling it was, but I didn't want to get my hopes up. I told Will everything about my relationship with Jane and how it ended because I'm really fucking gay for him. He was concerned, but I told him that me and Jane are on good terms now, even if our relationship didn't end that way.
We sat there on my bed, knees and shoulders pressed against eachother as we talked and explained everything about our relationship, trying to figure out when all of these feelings started. Then, I finally asked if I could kiss him, and long story short, we're dating!
Will is my boyfriend now!
William Jacob Byers is my boyfriend!!!
He's truly my light in these dark times. I love kissing him, and I'm gonna kiss him every chance that I get. I'm gonna take him on dates– even if that just means cuddling on the couch in the basement while watching movies. I'm gonna hold his hand, and make sure that I'm always touching him, because I'm never letting him go again. I'll be a much better boyfriend to him than I was to Jane. (I feel really guilty saying that.)
He makes my heart race in the best way ever. It feels almost like I'm a piece of metal and he's the magnet. I'm drawn to him, and I never want to let go.
Fuck that spare mattress, he's gonna sleep in my bed now– we already agreed to this, and as I'm writing, he's curled up asleep next to me, wearing my clothes. (He's so cute.)
I love him. (And he loves me.)
Fucking finally.
Turns out that the painting was for Mike, and Karen was right all along.
Looking back at the time that the Byers' were living with them, she should have suspected that something was going on between Mike and Will.
Though, it wasn't much different from when they were younger. Sure, they may have sat slightly closer on the couch, "sneakily" held hands under the dining table, and shared a room– Karen had once walked in on them sharing the bed, but she thought it was just a one time thing– but it was still pretty normal for them.
Apparently, they were dating.
Karen is just about to turn the page to read more, when she hears footsteps coming up the stairs, along with a few hushed whispers.
"I don't think anyone's home." She hears Mike whisper.
Oh crap!
Quickly, she shuts the journal, puts it back where she found it, and stands up, trying to exit the room before she gets caught.
She makes it past the desk before Mike catches her.
He's standing in the doorway, Will right next to him. His hand is underneath Will's shirt, rubbing over his hip– not at all platonically.
Will looks like a deer caught in headlights.
Mike just looks furious.
"Mom?" Mike questions, "What were you doing in my room?"
Karen quickly makes up an excuse. "Just cleaning," she says.
Mike's eyes look behind her, at the journal that is slightly off from it's original spot. "How much did you read?" He asks, still staring at the book, as if looking back at Karen will kill him.
Karen sighs, in trouble with her own child. "Only about twelve entries," she admits.
"Thank fucking god," Mike mutters under his breath. "Uh, then I guess you know..." He trails off, pulling Will slightly closer to him as they walk into the room, hoping that gets his point across.
Karen just nods, awkwardly exiting the room and shutting the door behind her, leaving them to do whatever they were going to do.
She's never snooping through her kids stuff again.