Chapter Text
The morning was colder than Claire had expected. She sat in the passenger seat, pulled up a little too high against the seatback, with one knee resting against the dashboard. Music was playing in her headphones, though she wasn’t really listening to it. She held her phone in both hands, scrolling through posts, messages, and photos she wasn’t even reading.
She had been doing it for a few minutes. Maybe ten. It didn’t really matter. It was simply easier to stare at the screen than out the window. The vehicle was parked in the driveway in front of the house, or rather, the pickup truck with the camper attached, which Chris stubbornly called a home on wheels, as if giving it that name would somehow make it stop looking like a giant white box on four wheels.
Claire glanced at him through the window. Chris was just closing the trunk. He did it with his characteristic movement, as if he wanted to make absolutely sure the lock had caught. He pulled on the hatch once more, then stepped back and looked at the vehicle. For a moment, his gaze stopped on the windshield.
Claire immediately went back to her phone. She didn’t want him to see that she had been looking at him. She wasn’t entirely sure why. It was stupid. The whole trip was a little stupid. At least, that was what she kept telling herself. She swiped across the screen. Nothing new. Again. Nothing. Again. Still nothing. Finally, she opened one of the apps, only to close it two seconds later because she had no idea why she had opened it in the first place. The song in her headphones changed.
Claire adjusted one of them. Outside, Chris opened the driver’s-side door, but before getting in, he looked toward the house one more time. The house was quiet. Too quiet for the beginning of a trip.
Claire remembered how, just a few weeks earlier, she had tried to imagine what all of this would look like. They would leave in the morning. Chris would complain about traffic. She would complain that he was driving too slowly. They would probably stop somewhere for breakfast. Maybe it would even be fun. But she had imagined it differently. In her head, the trip was supposed to be spontaneous. A little crazy. Without a specific plan. It was supposed to be something that had happened by accident.
Instead, Chris had prepared everything. The route was planned. Some of the accommodations had been booked. The vehicle had been checked. The camper had been cleaned. Food had been bought. The first-aid kit had been packed. The documents were ready. Even a list of everything they were supposed to bring had been printed out.
Claire rolled her eyes at the thought. Typical Chris. Everything had to be under control. Always. Even now. From the corner of her eye, she saw Chris close the driver’s-side door and walk around the vehicle. A moment later, the passenger door opened.
Claire didn’t look up. Chris got in. For a moment, he said nothing. He sat down, fastened his seat belt, and placed his hands on the steering wheel. He looked straight ahead. Then he glanced at Claire. She was still staring at her phone. The music was playing loudly enough for him to realize that she couldn’t hear him. Or didn’t want to.
Chris sighed quietly. He didn’t say anything. Instead, he reached into the glove compartment and took out his sunglasses. He placed them on the dashboard.
Claire scrolled through the screen. Chris glanced at his watch. Then at her again.
“Ready?”
Claire didn’t react. Chris waited a few seconds.
“Claire?”
Nothing.
He frowned. He reached over and lightly touched her shoulder.
Claire jumped. She immediately looked at him.
“What?”
Chris pulled his hand back.
“I asked if you were ready.”
Claire took one earbud out.
“What?”
“Are you ready?”
“Yes.”
Chris looked at her for a moment.
“Are you sure?”
For a second, Claire almost told him the truth. That she wasn’t sure about any of this. About the trip, about leaving, about spending the next few weeks trapped in a camper with him. But saying it out loud would make it real, and she didn’t want that. So she gave the answer she had been giving herself all morning.
Claire shrugged.
“Yes.”
“Okay.”
She put the earbud back in.
Chris sat still for a moment. He didn’t look particularly satisfied with her answer, but apparently decided not to push it. Claire went back to her phone. The engine was still off. Outside, the morning was slowly waking up. The sun was still low above the rooftops, casting long shadows across the street. The air had that cool, fresh smell that only seemed to exist in the morning. A car passed somewhere in the distance.
Claire glanced at the time. It was a few minutes past eight. Chris turned the key in the ignition, but didn’t start the engine yet.
“Do you have everything?” he asked.
Claire sighed.
“Yes.”
“Phone?”
“Yes.”
“Charger?”
“Yes.”
“Headphones?”
She looked at him.
“They’re on my ears.”
Chris smiled slightly.
“Fair point.”
Claire rolled her eyes.
“Wallet?”
“Yes.”
“Documents?”
“Yes.”
“Jacket?”
“Chris.”
“What?”
“I have everything.”
“Okay.”
“Okay.”
Silence fell.
Claire looked at her phone again. Chris leaned his head back against the headrest. This wasn’t how it was supposed to go. At least, not according to his plan. When he had come up with the idea for the trip a few weeks ago, it had seemed simpler. They would just leave. For a few weeks. No school, no work, no constant rushing around. They would have time. Lots of time. They would talk. Maybe they would even be like they used to be.
Chris remembered when Claire had been younger and could walk into his room just to tell him something completely unimportant. She could talk to him for twenty minutes about something that had happened at school, and he would pretend to be interested, even if halfway through he stopped understanding what she was talking about. Back then, it had been normal. She talked. He listened. Sometimes they argued. Sometimes they laughed. Sometimes Claire slammed the door. Then, usually a few hours later, she would come back to him and act as if nothing had happened. Over time, things had started to change.
Claire grew up. Chris worked more and more. At first, there were only individual days when they didn’t have time for each other. Then entire weeks. Until eventually, they started living under the same roof and passing each other like strangers.
Chris couldn’t say exactly when it had happened. And that was probably what irritated him the most. He hadn’t noticed the moment his little sister stopped telling him about her day. He hadn’t noticed when she stopped waiting for him to come home from work. He hadn’t noticed when she started closing the door to her room. He hadn’t noticed when how was school? started getting answered with fine.
And now she was sitting beside him with headphones on, staring at her phone.
Chris looked through the windshield. Maybe he shouldn’t have done this. Maybe the trip was a stupid idea. Maybe he should simply give her space. But he also knew that if he didn’t do this, nothing would probably change. And that was what scared him the most. Not an argument. Not Claire being angry with him. Just the thought that a year or two from now, they would still be sitting beside each other in silence, and neither of them would know how to break it anymore.
Chris slowly exhaled. He looked at her. Claire was staring at the screen.
“Claire.”
This time, she heard him.
“What?”
“Do you want anything else before we leave?”
“No.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes.”
“Okay.”
Silence again.
Chris shook his head with the faintest hint of a smile.
“You know you can talk, right?”
Claire looked at him.
“I know.”
“Good.”
“Mhm.”
And back to the phone.
Chris almost laughed. Not because he found it funny. More because the situation was so absurd that he no longer knew what else he could do.
“Okay.” he said.
Claire raised an eyebrow.
“Okay?”
“Okay.”
“Fine.”
Chris shook his head.
“Fine.”
For a moment, they looked at each other.
Claire was the first to look away. Chris did the same. Outside, the wind stirred the branches of a tree beside the driveway. Claire turned off her phone screen. She held it in her hand for a moment. Then she slipped it into the pocket of her hoodie.
Chris noticed the movement. He didn’t comment. Instead, he reached for his seat belt.
“I’m going to check the route one more time.”
“You’ve already checked it, like, five times.”
“Four.”
“That’s very reassuring.”
“Glad to hear it.”
Claire let out a quiet snort. It was brief. Almost imperceptible. But Chris heard it. And for a second, a genuine smile appeared on his face. Claire seemed to notice it too, because she immediately became serious again.
“What?”
“Nothing.”
“You’re looking at me.”
“Because you laughed.”
“So?”
“Nothing.”
“Chris.”
“Really. Nothing.”
Claire narrowed her eyes.
“You’re weird.”
“Thanks.”
“That wasn’t a compliment.”
“I know.”
This time, she smiled a little wider.
Chris looked away. It was the first time in several days that he had seen something on her face other than indifference. He didn’t want to ruin it. So he said nothing more. He reached for the key.
Claire took out her phone again. Chris stopped his hand.
“Hey.”
“What?”
“We’re really leaving.”
Claire looked at him.
“I know.”
“So you can wave goodbye to the house.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know.”
“That makes no sense.”
“A little.”
Claire looked through the window. The house looked exactly the same as always. Familiar windows. Familiar driveway. Familiar fence. She had seen all of it every day for the past few years. And now she wouldn’t see it for several weeks. Maybe it was strange, but for a moment she felt something close to unease.
The trip suddenly became more real. It was no longer just Chris’s idea. They were actually leaving.
Claire leaned her head back against the headrest.
“I’m not waving.”
“Sure.”
Chris didn’t insist. He turned the key. The engine shuddered but didn’t start. Claire looked at him. Chris tried again. Nothing.
“Seriously?” he muttered.
Claire took out one earbud.
“What?”
“Nothing.”
“The car won’t start?”
“Not yet.”
Chris turned the key a third time. The engine coughed. Then died. Claire stared at him for a moment. Then she started laughing. Chris turned his head.
“Really?”
“Sorry.”
She didn’t sound sorry.
“Very funny.”
“A little.”
Chris tried again. This time, the engine started without a problem. Claire immediately covered her mouth with her hand, but she was still laughing.
“Don’t say anything.”
“I’m not saying anything.”
“I can see that.”
“See what?”
“That smile.”
Chris shook his head.
“Put your seat belt on.”
“It’s already on.”
“Good.”
“Chris?”
“What?”
Claire looked at him for a moment.
“How far are we going?”
Chris glanced at the map.
“To start?”
“Mhm.”
“About four hours.”
Claire made a face.
“Four?”
“I told you.”
“I thought you were joking.”
“I wasn’t.”
“Four hours stuck with you?”
“You’ll survive.”
“I’m not sure about that yet.”
Chris chuckled under his breath.
“You can change the music.”
Claire looked at him, slightly surprised.
“What?”
“If you want.”
“I have my own.”
“I know.”
“Then why are you asking?”
“I don’t know.”
Claire put the earbud back in. For a moment, she looked as though she wanted to say something. She didn’t. Chris put the car into gear. The vehicle began to move slowly. They pulled out of the driveway.
Claire looked back through the window. The house began to grow smaller. She didn’t know why she suddenly felt a strange tightness in her throat. It was only a few weeks. A few weeks. Nothing serious. And yet she kept looking at the familiar windows until they disappeared around the corner.
Chris drove calmly. He didn’t try to start a conversation. He didn’t ask what she was thinking. He didn’t tell her that everything would be okay. He simply drove.
And maybe that was exactly what Claire needed.