Archive of Our Own

Three weeks after River’s visit to Erid, the TARDIS lands on my beach once again. I feel the tightness in my chest loosen as I lay my eyes on it, the knowledge that the Doctor has come back making me feel relieved. Half of me thinks it’s a bit pathetic that I can’t go longer than three weeks without feeling the aches and pains of touch starvation, but the other half of me can’t bring myself to care when I know the Doctor and Amy are here again. I wonder if they’ve brought Rory with them too. I’m excited to meet him.

Rocky and I are on our morning walk when we see it land and we immediately divert our path back towards the beach, a spring in my step, my excitement building as we get closer. Rocky sings happily beside me, having sensed my joy.

‘Doctor back!’ He chirps, scampering along beside me. ‘Grace can have human touch to fix aching heart now.’

“Yeah pal,” I say through a grin. “I’ve missed him so much. I hope he’s got Rory with him as well as Amy. Maybe River too. Wouldn’t that be a treat?”

Rocky grumbles at the mention of River which makes me chuckle. He’s still sore that he missed her visit, and has been badgering me on when she will next come to Erid. I have to remind him that I have no way of contacting her, so therefore I have no idea when she will next come back. It would be nice if she was here with the Doctor now. To have four of them visit would be such a treat!

We come to a stop outside the TARDIS and I lean forwards, knocking loudly on the door, barely able to suppress my excitement at having my friends back with me. I’ve missed them so much. Rocky jiggles happily beside me, clawing at my knee in excitement. I chuckle and pat the top of his carapace.

The door swings open and I look up, a smile on my lips, ready to greet the Doctor and his friends, but I freeze when I lay my eyes on the man before me. This man isn’t just the Doctor. He’s my Doctor. The same face, if a little older looking. Same silly hair do, same shining eyes, same big, toothy grin.

My breath catches in my throat as he steps out of the TARDIS, tilting his head onto one side. “Hello dear Grace. I’ve missed you.”

“Oh my god,” is all I can choke out, before the Doctor moves close to me and wraps his arms around me, letting me bury myself against him. “Doctor, my Doctor. You’re here!” My words are muffled from where I’ve pressed my face against his neck, my arms clinging to his shoulders as his curl around my waist. He pulls me closer, ever closer to him, his face pressed into my hair.

Rocky crows with joy beside us, leaning against our legs and humming happily. I laugh wetly, my arms tightening around the Doctor’s shoulders, entirely unable to believe that my Doctor has come back to me. I didn’t think I’d ever get to see this face again. He’s older looking than last time, but I don’t care. He’s my Doctor and he’s here, in my arms, on my beach. He’s come home.

“I didn’t think I’d ever get to see this face again,” I croak out, lifting my head to look into his old, old eyes, which crinkle as his lips lift into a smile. “I’ve missed you so, so much.”

“I’m here, Grace. My Grace. I’m here,” he reassures me, bringing one hand up to straighten my glasses as they’re all crooked from where I smushed my face against his neck. “I couldn’t- I had to see you again. I know I visit you so much over the coming years, but I had to come and see you again. We had to come and see you again.”

“We? Who’s we?” I ask, befuddled, still trying to wrap my head around the fact that this is my Doctor here, and not just the Doctor.

“Who do you think, space man?” Says an all too familiar voice from the door of the TARDIS, and I light up as my eyes land on Donna, her arms folded loosely across her chest, a soft smile on her face. “Hello Grace.”

“Donna!” I choke out, letting go of the Doctor and reaching out to her. “You’re here! But- how is this even possible?”

She catches me easily, wrapping me up in her warm embrace while I hear the Doctor greet Rocky behind us. I can’t quite believe she’s actually here and that she’s alive! The Doctor told me that if she ever remembered him, she’d explode. And she looks rather intact to me right now. So how on Erid is she here?

“It’s a long story,” she tells me, “but I have a daughter, and she absorbed half of the time lord malarky that was swishing around in my head. It was much weaker split between two people, so when Time Boy over there appeared back into my life, I didn’t explode.”

“You have a daughter?” I exclaim. “Oh my gosh, this is, I mean, I’m so happy for you! How old is she? What’s her name?”

“My name is Rose,” says a third voice from behind Donna, and I look over to see a teen girl smiling shyly at me. “Hi Doctor Grace.”

“And she’s here too! Oh my gosh. Please just call me Grace,” I tell her, stepping away from Donna and holding my hand out for Rose to shake, which she does. I squeeze her hand gently, feeling completely overwhelmed with joy and love that my favourite people are finally back on my beach. “Oh, I can’t believe you’re all here. I didn’t think I’d ever get to see you again. How are you even here? Did something happen to the last Doctor? What’s going on?”

“Whoa there Grace, breathe,” the Doctor says with a soft chuckle, resting his hand on my shoulder as I bury my face in my hands, trying to regulate myself as my emotions run haywire. “It’s alright. We’ll tell you everything. Just breathe.”

I force myself to breathe deeply, listening to the waves and focusing on the feeling of the Doctor’s hand on my shoulder. He’s squeezing gently and I push into the contact, beyond grateful that he’s here with me once more. I never thought I’d get to see him again, yet here he is, with Donna and her daughter in tow.

This day really couldn’t get any better.

I lift my head, letting out one more deep breath, and smile at my three guests, overjoyed that they’re still here and I didn’t dream them up in a moment of delusional fantasy. Rocky makes a quiet noise from beside me and I grin down at him as he puts his claw on my knee.

‘Grace have lots of friends now,’ he hums gently. ‘Fix achey heart.’

I snort, nudging his claw. “Alright, thanks Rock. Airing out my sadness for them all to see.”

The Doctor’s eyebrows pinch together and he looks at me with concern all over his expression. He opens his mouth to speak but I hurry my sentence on before he can get anything out. I don’t need him fretting over me right now, not while I’m so happy he’s finally here again.

“Just- missing human connection. Y’know? You spoil me with your visits,” I joke, but it doesn’t seem to lessen his concern. “Come on. Let’s get a drink from Armando then we can go and sit in the forest and catch up?”

His face softens and he holds his arm out for me. “Yes, let’s. And you can actually tell these two everything now they’ve lived through it.”

I gasp as I loop my arm through the Doctor’s, looking at Donna and Rose with shining eyes. “Yes! You’ve experienced the Hail Mary launch now haven’t you?”

“We have,” Donna says, her own arm looped through Rose’s. “It’s a bloody scary time, I tell you. All this astrophage business. But you’re off to save us so I need not worry.”

“Mum kept saying that she recognised you,” Rose tells me with a smile. “She was always saying that she knew your face from somewhere, which I thought was mad because how would my mum know an American middle school teacher. But she was convinced she knew you from somewhere.”

My features soften as we walk. “River said that you might recognise me. She said you have such a big heart that you wouldn’t be able to forget me that easily.”

Donna chuckled. “Well, she was right! Honestly, I couldn’t put my finger on where I knew you from. Just that I recognised your face. Rose and Shaun, my husband, both thought I was mad. Mad as a box of frogs.”

“It’s reassuring to know that Mum isn’t actually mad and that she did know the random school teacher sent up to space,” Rose pipes up, making the Doctor and Donna laugh, but my heart sinks as she speaks. I flash a smile at her before looking away, pushing down the feelings of upset.

I’ve spent many a day crying over how and why I was sent up here. I’ve cursed Stratt and her team every which way possible, because even though I know she did the right thing and I am thankful for the life it’s given me, the circumstances to get here were… less than ideal.

The Doctor squeezes my arm, bringing me back to myself. “You okay?” He asks quietly, and I nod hurriedly.

“Yes, yeah. All good. Still just can’t believe you’re all here."

A large smile creeps onto his face and he gently knocks our shoulders together. “Well. We’re in a bit of a pickle back on Earth in our timeline. It’s all getting a bit much, so I thought we’d come here to see you again. Just to escape from it all for a little bit. We can’t stay long, but we had to visit.”

Of course they can’t stay long. That would be silly of me to hope so. They’ve brought Donna’s daughter with them, for crying out loud. There’s no way they can stay for long. But they’re here and that’s all that matters to me right now. They’re here and I get to see my Doctor and Donna again. 

“You’re here,” is all I say to him with a smile. He understands, squeezing my arm again, before filling the space with quiet chatter as we walk back up to my house. I spot my cane by the door when we enter and grimace as I really feel the ache in my legs. I need to get better at remembering to bring that with me when I leave the house. Rocky spots it too and picks it up, waving it at me.

‘Grace always forget cane!’ He says with an angry stomp. ‘I make for you and you always forget. Stop forgetting. Remember!’

“Sorry bud,” I wince, patting the top of his carapace. “I’ll bring it next time, I promise.”

“You need a cane?” Donna asks as I dig around in my fridge for the cordials I made with the fruit from my trees.

“Yeah. The gravity wreaks havoc on my joints,” I tell her, “and I’m not as young as I used to be. I swim a lot, which helps, but Rocky made me the cane when I complained one too many times about aching joints.”

‘Need Grace to be comfortable,’ Rocky says stoutly, his claw fiddling with the hem of my pants. ‘Grace old. Lives far away from Earth. Needs to be comfortable and happy on Erid.’

I smile down at him, the urge to drop to the floor and hug him almost overwhelming me, but I know it would hurt too much to try that. “I am comfortable and happy here. I’m just getting a bit older. It’s okay, pal.”

Rocky sags, pressing his carapace against me. ‘Too old,’ he hums sadly, and I roll my eyes.

“Hey. No being sad while we have my Doctor and Donna and Rose over. We’re being spoiled. Let’s be happy! Okay?”

“Your Doctor is he?” Donna teases lightly, making me blush. I start to stutter out a response but she shushes me, waving her hand. “I’m only taking the mick. I know what you mean.”

I shrug self consciously, fully aware of the Doctor’s gaze on me. “I just- his new face…”

“Grace.”

I turn slowly to face the Doctor, who steps up to me and wraps his arm around my shoulders, pulling me against his side.

“He loves you as much as I love you,” he reassures me. “He cherishes you more than anyone else in his life. Except his wife. But you, Grace, you are the most important person to me. To us. I know he looks different and he acts different, but he’s still me.”

“I know,” I say, a slight petulant tone in my voice, letting myself lean against him. “It’s just- he’s so different. I love him and I appreciate that he still comes to see me, but you’re… you’re you.”

“And I’m here,” he reminds me, squeezing me before letting me go. “And I believe you promised drinks and a catch up in the forest?”

Rose helps me gather up drinks, glasses and snacks into a basket, which she graciously carries as Rocky pushes my cane into my hand with a grumble. Walking with the cane is so much easier than without, but I hate it as it’s a reminder of my age and how alien I am to this planet. But I’m thankful that Rocky took the time to make it so I can be more comfortable while living here.

Rocky and I lead our guests out into the little clearing in the forest and Rocky uses the walk to, once again, gush about his wonderful scientist of a mate. He tells Rose all about Adrian’s incredible work on my biodome and how they spent days trying to make my home the best it could possibly be, pouring over the science about how to grow Earth trees and plants on an alien planet. Rose appears to be hanging off his every word, which makes me smile. It’s nice to know that kids are still so eager to learn about all things wild and wonderful.

The Doctor and Donna spread out the blanket when we get to the clearing and the five of us sit around it in a circle, leaving a space for Adrian, who Rocky assures will be joining us in a bit. I pass around the food and drinks and we get comfortable, with Rocky curled up at my side as usual, because even though he still finds humans eating disgusting, he makes an exception for me every now and again. Because he loves me. 

I smile around at my friends, my heart feeling more full of love than ever. The Doctor notices my stupid grin and he squeezes my arm briefly.

“Happy?” He asks me.

“Extremely,” I reply, which makes him smile back at me, before Rose clears her throat.

“This whole place is absolutely phenomenal,” she says. “I mean, Adrian and the team doing all this work for you is just incredible. And the fact that you’ve been able to grow Earth plants here is beyond comprehending. You really drew the long straw here, Doctor Grace.”

I flush and Rocky hums with pride. “I am honoured they thought me special enough to do all of this for. I’m only one person, yet they’ve given me my own space that replicates Earth.”

‘Grace saved Erid and saved Rocky. You deserve all of this. You are very special,’ Rocky reminds me firmly.

“It’s the least you deserve after your great sacrifice,” Donna states. “You bravely volunteered last minute to go on this crazy mission, so I think this is literally perfect for you. You disappeared off into space, saved Earth, saved Erid and you saved Rocky’s life. Come on, Grace. Give yourself a little credit.”

My stomach twists violently and I look away as Rocky, Rose and the Doctor join in Donna’s praise for me. A sour taste bubbles up at the back of my throat and I can’t listen to them singing my praises. Yes, I helped save Earth and Erid and I saved Rocky, but I didn’t volunteer for this post. 

But none of them really know that, do they?

It wasn’t in any of the videos I sent back to Earth, I didn’t even tell Rocky the story of how I ended up on the Hail Mary with two dead crewmates. I only briefly shared it with the Doctor when he came here after he had to wipe Donna’s memory, but he never chased it up. He never got the full story.

I wrap my arms around my torso in an attempt to fight off the shakes that I can feel coming on. This is supposed to be a happy time! My Doctor has come back to me and he’s brought Donna and Rose with him! The last thing I want to do is ruin it by making them all hate me when I reveal that I am not the brave volunteer that they think I am, but that I am a simple coward who would’ve killed the entire human race all because I didn’t want to be sent to die in space.

Rocky makes a low hum of concern next to me. ‘Grace?’ He puts his claw on my knee but I flinch away, trying to curl in on myself to stop myself from letting my feelings take over. Rocky’s hum becomes more distressed and I notice that the others have fallen silent. I can feel their eyes on me and I hate it. Half of me wishes I was alone right now so I can process all these feelings without them watching me and judging me. Because I know they will judge me. How can they not? They think I’m some brave hero but I’m just a coward.

“Grace.” The Doctor’s voice is soft, gentle and oh so loving. It wouldn’t be loving if he knew who I really am. He’d turn on me with disdain. His whole deal is saving people and being brave. I go against all of that. “Grace, look at me.”

I feel fingers on my chin, gently guiding my face around so I’m looking into the Doctor’s concerned eyes. I wince, wanting to pull away from his grip but finding myself frozen.

“What’s wrong?” He asks quietly, “Is it something we’ve said that’s upset you?”

Yes, yes it absolutely is, because they’re all praising me when they really shouldn’t be.

“No,” is what I stutter out instead, loathing the way my voice shakes. “I’m fine. Just- old man shakes, that’s all. I ache. I’m fine.”

‘Grace lies,’ Rocky rats me out, pressing against my side and I can tell he wants to climb into my lap. ‘Heartrate elevated. Shaking but not from age or aches. Shaking from panic.’

I sigh and have the strongest urge to push him away but I can’t bring myself to. “I hate that you can read my body language so well,” I grumble, not really meaning it. Him being able to read me so well means he spots when I need to rest long before I notice it.

“Panic? Why are you panicking?” Donna asks worriedly. “We don’t want to upset you, Grace. We’re so sorry if anything we’ve said has made you panic.”

“No, no, it’s not- it’s not you guys,” I hurry to reassure her. “It’s just- the implications… the lies.”

“Lies?” Rose says, sounding rather shocked. The Doctor’s let go of my chin and he’s staring at me with worry in his eyes. “What lies? We’re not lying, we’re saying how amazed we are at your bravery-”

“But I’m not brave!” I burst out, curling back in on myself, really wishing the conversation would just move on from this. I don’t want to bring the mood down when I have my Doctor back with me. “I’m not brave.”

“You are so brave,” the Doctor cuts in fiercely, an edge to his voice I’ve not heard before. “You are one of the bravest humans I’ve ever met.”

“I promise you I’m not,” I bite back, refusing to look at any of them, keeping my gaze directed firmly at my lap. “I’m a coward.”

“Oh, bloody hell, Grace, the last thing you are is a coward,” Donna says exasperatedly. “How can you be a coward when you’ve sacrificed everything for the future of two planets?”

“Because I didn’t make that sacrifice,” I snap, my face wanting to twist into an ugly sneer though I try to keep myself under control. I can feel a lump growing in my throat. “I didn’t even volunteer to go on this mission.”

Silence.

I can feel their eyes on me as my own fill with tears and I let out a choked sob, the lump in my throat too big to swallow down. Rocky makes a sad noise, pressing against me, one of his legs making its way onto my lap.

“What do you mean you didn’t volunteer,” the Doctor asks, a dangerously quiet note to his voice and I gulp, fighting to speak over the urge to cry.

“I mean that I didn’t volunteer, I- there were so many other scientists who had volunteered to be on the reserve list after DuBois and Shapiro were blown up. Many others who had the gene and who would’ve done an incredible job.”

“But?” Rose prompts gently when I don’t continue and I sigh.

“But Stratt said it would take too long to get them up to speed. She wanted me. She said I had until the end of the day to make my decision.” I pause, trying to compose myself as I feel tears slip down my cheeks. “I told her no. I said I wouldn’t go and that she’d have to use one of the other scientists on the list because I wasn’t going to leave my kids behind and I didn’t want to go to space on a bloody suicide mission.

“As you can guess, I didn’t really have a choice. She locked me in a cell to keep me away from the others, ‘coz Yáo refused to go up with anyone who didn’t want to go. Then they sedated me, gave me an amnesia drug and shoved me off to space. I woke up with two dead crewmates on a ship eleven point nine light years away from Earth with no idea who I was, what I was doing there, or what I was supposed to do.”

More silence. A quick look up reveals that Donna has tears in her eyes and Rose is curled against her, looking shocked. I don’t want to see how Rocky or the Doctor react to this news. I know they probably all hate me now they know I’m not the big brave hero they thought me to be, though Rocky hasn’t removed his leg from my lap.

“Why did they give you the amnesia drug?” Donna asks quietly, her arm around Rose, and I wince.

“Because I threatened to sabotage the mission,” I mumble, ashamed of my past actions. “I said if she sent me up there without my consent, I’d do whatever I could to ruin things for the others. She drugged me to make me compliant. So that Yáo and Ilyukhina would train me up and we would work together to save the planet.”

There. I’ve said it all now. They all know I’m a coward and a fraud. I’m not some brave man, nor a hero who saved two planets. I’m a coward who didn’t want to go up in the first place and had actively threatened to sabotage the mission and let Earth die. They hate me now. I know they do.

“Sorry,” I croak out when no-one else says anything. “I didn’t want to- this was supposed to be a happy reunion. But I understand if you all want to go now, because I’m not a hero, I’m just a coward-”

“Shut your mouth,” Donna snaps before she untangles herself from Rose and moves over to me, sweeping me into her arms and holding me tightly. I can’t help the sob that rips through me as I bury myself into her embrace, holding onto her for dear life. Rocky stays pressed against my other side, keeping me cocooned between the two of them.

“You are brave,” she whispers fiercely into my hair, gently rocking me as I cry in her arms. “You are so, so brave, Grace. You survived all of that and you still saved both planets.”

“That’s only because by the time I’d remembered what she did to me, I’d done too much work to sabotage it all! And it wasn’t just Earth that was on the line either-”

“Doesn’t matter. You worked your arse off even though you knew you were on a suicide mission and even after you’d figured out how you’d got there,” she says, pulling back to cup my face in the palm of her hands. She has tears staining her cheeks. “You are the bravest man I’ve ever met.”

“I’m really not,” I counter shakily, but I’m cut off as Rocky grumbles at me.

‘Grace bravest human ever,’ he says firmly. ‘You were all alone in space then you met me. Grace friend. Not try to hurt Rocky or sabotage mission. Worked with me, put yourself in my atmosphere to save me. Then gave up going home to save me again.’

“Well I wasn’t going to let you die,” I choke out, but he bulldozes on.

‘Had so many things working against you. But you worked and you saved us all. Grace bravest human ever.’ He pauses then lets out the Eridian equivalent of a snort. ‘Don’t talk shit about my best friend again.’

That makes all of us laugh slightly, and I let go of Donna to scoop Rocky into my lap, though it’s less me scooping him and more him scrambling into my lap, wrapping his two front legs around me. Donna leaves one arm around my shoulders and I feel the Doctor place a hand on my other arm. I look over at him, terrified at what I might see, but melting when all I am met with is compassion and concern.

“I am sorry I didn’t follow up on all this when I lived with you,” he murmurs softly, regret echoing in his voice. “I remember now, you briefly told me what happened to you when I came here straight after losing Donna. I was too caught up in my own grief to even think about you being ejected into space against your own will. I said it then and I will say it now, I am deeply sorry for how humanity failed you, Grace. I am sorry that everything you went through was entirely against your own will. No-one deserves to have their life stripped away from them.”

“But Eva- she did the right thing,” I mumble, my heart clenching, hating to admit that the woman who sent me to die was in the right. “I was the best qualified for the job, even if I didn’t want to go. It would’ve taken ages to get the new scientist up to speed on everything they needed to know about astrophage. I was the world’s leading expert. Who better to send than the most qualified person in the world?”

“Just because you were the most qualified doesn’t mean what she did was the right thing,” Rose argues, stubbornly. Just like her mother. “The other scientist would’ve figured it out! They would’ve had Yáo and Ilyukhina to guide them-”

“No they wouldn’t have,” I remind her softly. “Where are they now, hm? Yáo and Ilyukhina weren’t as coma resistant as we thought them to be. That scientist would’ve been as alone as I was. Stratt did the right thing. Even if I don’t like it, it was the right thing to do. So please don’t hate her when you go back to Earth. In your timeline, I’m still in a coma on the ship on the way to our destination. So don’t- don’t think badly of Eva, or spread hate about her, okay? She’s- she was just doing what she had to to save the world.”

‘Grace saved world. Grace and Rocky saved Earth and Erid. Stratt did nothing. Grace and Rocky saviours of the universe,’ Rocky states firmly, burrowing impossibly closer to me, his warmth spreading through my body and making me relax into the love that my friends are providing me.

“Yeah, we are, aren’t we pal?”

‘I love you, Grace.’

“I love you too, Rocky.”

‘Not as much as Rocky loves me though,’ comes another Eridian voice, making us all jump and I look up to see Adrian approaching. ‘Grace. Friend Grace. Saviour Grace. You are brave brave brave. Give yourself more credit.’

That startles a laugh out of me and Rocky chitters happily at the sight of his mate. “Thanks, Adrian.”

‘May not have been ideal how you got here,’ they continue, plonking themselves down next to a startled Rose, ‘but I am thankful you were there to meet Rocky and save us all. Now you are here, you are home with us. Brave human. Brave soul.’

“I guess I found someone to be brave for,” I muse, looking down at Rocky, who nuzzles my chest lovingly. “Anyway. Enough of me being sad! You’re all so wonderful and I love you all so, so much.”

‘Love you too, friend Grace,’ Rocky and Adrian harmonise, and the sentiment is echoed by the Doctor, Donna and Rose. I smile around at all my friends, taking a moment to compose myself before Rocky gently extracts himself from me. Donna moves back to the other side of Rose.

I introduce Rose to Adrian, and the two of them immediately start chatting as Rose says how impressed she is at my biodome, which of course sets Adrian off on a science tangent, though Rose seems genuinely interested in what they’re saying. It warms my heart to see the youth still interested in science, even if she is living in a perilous time.

Rocky settles happily at my side, leaning against me and the Doctor shuffles closer to me, letting our shoulders rest together. I look over at him with a soft smile.

“You are an incredible man, Grace,” he murmurs. “You’ve done so many incredible things, and you will continue to do incredible things.”

“Oh yeah? You know that for sure do you?” I tease lightly and he rolls his eyes good naturedly.

“I have it on good authority that you are a man who fights for what you think is right,” he says with a wry smile. “You have such a big heart and a kind soul. You’re so wonderful, dear Grace. So wonderful.”

“Ah, stop it,” I say, nudging his shoulder with mine and hiding my blush behind my sandwich. “You’re making me blush.”

“Oi, you two, stop flirting in front of the food,” Donna jokes and I laugh as the Doctor lets out an indignant snort.

“I am not flirting with Grace. Unless he’d like me to flirt with him, then I am more than happy to,” he replies, only making me laugh harder. “Do you want me to flirt with you Grace?”

“As much as I love the attention, I think I’m okay,” I say with a grin. “You’re very lovely and all, but I’m quite happy as I am. Besides, you’re married, aren’t you? Your wife was here the other day looking for you.”

The Doctor pauses, his brow furrowing before he sighs, slumping a little more against me. “My wife. My wonderful River Song.”

“Yes, her. Is she still alive for you? She was saying things about how wibbly and wobbly your timelines are. Something about her going backwards on yours while you go forwards on hers. I didn’t really understand it all to be honest.”

“No, she died a couple faces ago,” he says softly, a small smile on his lips. “It’s nice that she’s still around for you though. I loved that woman more than I ever loved anyone.”

“I can see why,” I reply, my voice as soft as his. “She’s a phenomenal woman. She wants to come back soon to see all the science that the biodome team works on. I know she’d love to meet you, Adri. The two of you could talk science for days.”

‘I look forward to meeting her,’ Adrian rumbles.

The conversation drifts from me to them when I ask for the full story behind the reunion and what a story they have for me. It’s long and convoluted, with many dangerous reasons on why this face came back for the Doctor and why he was able to reunite with Donna and how she got her memory back and how they had to deal with ‘Beep the Meep’ and the ‘Wrath Warriors’ while they’re now in the midst of dealing with ‘The Toymaker.’

It sounds rather scary and far too much to be dealing with on top of the fact that the world is still suffering the effects of astrophage eating the sun. They’re in 2023, which was only a couple of years after the Hail Mary was launched, so the world is still very much in danger from astrophage and I am fast asleep on the ship, in a coma with two dead crewmates.

Anyway.

They’re here because the Doctor wanted to see me again with this face. He said he had to because he wasn’t sure how long he’d have this face for and he wanted to see me again as the Doctor he met me. 

I think that’s rather sweet.

I do love the Doctor, who he is now, but I’ll always hold a soft spot for my Doctor. The man who found me and lived with me for months, teaching me what it feels like to be loved by another person. It makes me melt to learn that he was thinking about me and needed to make sure I see this face again. Even in the midst of a mad fight on Earth, he’s still found time to come and see me. His lonely human on an alien planet.

Oh how I love him.

He tells me that this face is two faces after the one I currently know. Which makes sense, as I think I remember Amy being from 2010, so there was bound to be a couple of changes between that face and getting this face back. He’s not supposed to really give me any spoilers about his life and my future, but he reassures me that I have a long while with this face. 

It’s nice to just sit and chat with him, Donna and Rose for ages. I can feel my old body complaining about sitting on the forest floor for too long, but I ignore it, wanting to spend as much time here with my friends as possible. I don’t want them to leave me again. I don’t want to lose my Doctor again. 

But I know they have to. As selfish as I am for wanting them to stay with me forever, I know they need to get back to Earth to save the day and defeat the Toymaker. And by the look on the Doctor’s face, he knows it too. He catches me staring at him and wraps his arm around my shoulders, gently tugging me to lean against him. I go willingly, soaking up any bit of touch I can get before they have to leave.

“You’ll be okay, Grace,” he murmurs, his hands rubbing up and down my arm soothingly. “The Doctor comes back for you. Amy is there, Rory is there, River is there… You are so loved by all of them. All of us. You are never alone for long.”

“That’s reassuring,” I say, turning my head to smile up at him. “I love you very much.”

“And I love you too.”

“But you have to leave now, don’t you?” I whisper, letting my head fall into the crook of his neck as I feel him nod. “You’ve got to go and save the day. Save Earth. Keep them safe while I’m out in space.”

“Oh, I do hate leaving you,” he grumbles. “I know you’ll be alright, I just- I don’t want to go. I want to be selfish and stay here again, like I did all those years ago.”

“I want you to stay too. But you have a planet to save.”

He sighs, complaining under his breath about how often he has to save Earth and how he wishes the ‘wretched aliens’ would just leave the planet alone, for God’s sake. An amused expression settles on my face and I agree with him. Aliens should just leave Earth alone. Especially now that I’ve saved the place from astrophage. Wretched aliens indeed.

We clear up our mini picnic and slowly make our way back to my house to drop everything off before Rocky, Adrian and I accompany Rose, Donna and my Doctor back to the TARDIS. Rose steps up to me and sticks her hand out for me to shake.

“It was an honour meeting you, Doctor Grace,” she says, ever so polite. “Thank you for what you’re doing for Earth. You are an inspiration for so many young people.”

“Ah, shucks, that’s wonderful,” I reply, squeezing her hand. “You take care, yeah? It will all be alright in the end.”

She grins at me before stepping back, allowing Donna to sweep me into her arms, cradling me close to her body.

“You take care,” she says to me as I lean into her embrace, basking in her love. “You are the bravest man alive. Don’t you forget that. You are such an incredible person who has sacrificed so much. You deserve the world, Grace.”

“I’m gonna miss you, Donna,” I choke out, my voice muffled as my face is pressed against her hair. “You’re so wonderful.”

“I won’t ever forget you, okay?” She says fiercely, her hold tightening a fraction.

“I’ll make sure she doesn’t,” Rose reassures me with a grin, and I give her a thumbs up. Donna pulls back and cups my face in her hands, leaning up to kiss my forehead. 

“Look after yourself.” She smiles and goes into the TARDIS, wrapping Rose in a hug so the Doctor and I can have a moment to ourselves. Rocky and Adrian have moved a little farther away in an attempt to give us privacy, though I know they’ll both hear everything anyway.

I can’t bring myself to look at my Doctor as a lump has formed in my throat with the knowledge that I’ll never get to see this face again. I’ll never be able to look at the Doctor and see the face I know and love so well again. This is the last time.

He steps up to me and pulls me against him. Neither of us say anything for a moment. We just bask in the love that we’re providing to each other. My fingers find purchase in his long blue coat and I cling to him, eyes closed, trying to keep my emotions in check.

Eventually though, he lets me go and steps back, tucking his hands into his pockets. I wipe my eyes on the sleeve of my cardigan and send him a shaky smile.

“You’ve got quite the future ahead of you, my dear friend,” he says, voice wobbling, a smile ghosting his lips. “It’s so bright and beautiful. Just like you are.”

“I’m gonna miss you,” I warble, leaning heavily on my cane and wrapping my other arm around myself. I feel Rocky press against my legs, a solid support, keeping me steady. “My Doctor. My wonderful Doctor.”

“I will miss you too,” he tells me, leaning in the TARDIS door, tears glistening in his eyes. “My Grace. My lonely human on an alien planet. You are the most extraordinary human I’ve ever had the pleasure of meeting. The bravest, most wonderful human.”

A grin spreads across my face and I tilt my head to one side. “You’re too kind… Take care of them, won’t you?”

He smiles back at me. “I will.” He straightens and lifts his right hand to his forehead in salute to me. “Doctor Captain Ryland Grace. It has been an honour.”

I laugh, bowing slightly to him. “The honour is all mine, Doctor. Now go give ‘em hell.”

His grin brightens and he drops his hand. “Allonsy!” 

The TARDIS door swings shut and Rocky gently ushers me back out of the way so I won’t get covered in sand and pebbles as it leaves. I stand with him and Adrian on either side of me and we watch as the TARDIS starts to flicker out of existence on my beach. We stay there for ages, the two of them standing in silent support for me as I stare at the spot where the TARDIS had stood.

A lone tear falls down my face and I can’t be bothered to wipe it away.

I got my Doctor back. If only for a brief day, I had him back. That same face, with the same stupid hair do, and the same warm grin. He was here, on my beach, with his arms around me.

I smile, bowing my head before looking down at Adrian and Rocky, who are harmonising quietly to keep me calm.

“You guys wanna watch a movie?” I ask croakily and they hurry to agree.

‘Watch The Martian, question?’ Adrian asks as we make our way back to my house, and I nod.

“Yeah, why not?”

We settle down on my couch, me in the middle and the movie starts playing. My mind drifts, thinking about what the Doctor meant when he said I have a big and beautiful future ahead of me. Of course he knows my future, as he’s in it, but I can’t help but wonder. My life is already big and beautiful.

What could possibly happen to make it better?