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Lohen quietly slipped out the door, silent in his fury as he stepped into the cold night air, instantly hitting him with a deep chill that went right through the thin fabric of his coat– He gritted his teeth refusing to be so pitiful as to shiver, the poor little hare all alone and abandoned and forgotten. No, he would not be that pathetic.
In truth, it was a rather nice bar. Situated on the top floor of a larger building, plenty of fun and even roof access. Varka promised plenty of good non-alcoholic choices, which was true, but he also promised him a date that Lohen has very much decided, is over since he saw that stupid drunk old man flirting with another man. If his fingers weren’t damn freezing off, he’d make time to chop Varka’s dick off later, then see if that fucking ghostly-ass man would still want him then.
That violent thought made him feel a little better.
He came up to the railing on the rooftop, leaning against it. The city lights sparkled beneath them, and if he looked up, there was the moon, full and bright today. The stars were a bit faint compared to home in Mondstat, given how bright Nod Krai city was, but they were still there, at least.
“You want a drag?”
A voice spoke to him from the side– At first Lohen thought it hadn’t been meant for him, but as he turns around to find the source of the voice, a young man is looking directly at him, holding out the non-burning end of a cheap cigarette, the smoke wafting out and blown in Lohen’s direction, nauseating and a little intense. If his gesture wasn’t clear enough, it seemed that they were the only ones on this rooftop at that moment.
“You look like you need it,” the man said delicately. His voice was smooth like a rich and buttery honey, the stuff that topped layers of fluffy breakfast pancake– Except the very edge of it, deep and a little gritty, like someone had forgotten to brush off the fine layer of ember and burnt kindling on a fire gone out. Lohen almost felt it rumble within the canals of his ear, reverberating– It was a soothing voice. Much welcome after how loud that bar had been, and Varka’s more grating tones which he was often much louder than he thought, especially when drunk.
He continued holding out the end of his half-burnt cigarette passively, staring into him with eyes that seemed rather melancholic itself.
“Thanks,” Lohen said gruffly, reaching out for the burnt end. Then, he pressed the still smoking end to the back of his hand– It burnt on impact, crumbling away the end which had already begun turning into ash, leaving nothing but a scorch mark, a little ash, and a lovely stinging pain on his skin.
The man beside him startled instantly, like some bird with fluttering wings. “What are you doing?!” He shouted, reaching out to grab the cigarette, now nothing except a butt, tearing it out of Lohen’s hands. Quickly, he grabbed his wrist to pull up and observe the damaged skin. His fingertips were rough and hardened, like they had been frosted in a lifetime of cold.
“Forward, aren’t you?” Lohen said jokingly, but his heart wasn’t fully in the joke, still thinking about Varka.
He stared up at him with those pretty sapphire-ruby hued eyes, “Are you crazy?!”
Lohen shrugged, “A little. Why, do you care?”
The other man sighed. He seemed to rummage in his coat pocket for a bit– It was a long, muted-brown coat going nearly all the way down to his feet that looked like it had seen better days, but warm, the fur lining along it all matted and no longer velvety soft as you’d imagine it’s supposed to be. Lohen catches sight of the lid of a box of cigarettes and a lighter as he digs in there, but eventually, the man pulls out a bottle of a little spray of some kind, as well as a tissue.
“Here, give me your hand.”
Maybe he wouldn’t have bothered to listen if the man’s voice wasn’t so pleasant, but not like he has anything better to do up here.
He sprayed a bit of the liquid on the burn mark– Antiseptic, Lohen realized immediately from the wonderful sting it gave. Then, the stranger wiped it, taking all the ash with it and leaving only a small red welt on the back of his hand.
“There,” he said, seeming a lot calmer now. “You should run that under some cold water when you get home.”
“You’re a strange one,” Lohen thought back to how the man had gotten his feathers all ruffled in panic and resisted smiling for how funny it was– “Birdie. Wasting away your lungs on cigarettes, but so cautious as to keep antiseptic on you?”
The stranger sputtered a bit.
“I–” He blinked rapidly, “I would refrain from judging other people, especially strangers so carelessly, bunny.”
Huh. So the little bird could bite.
Lohen tore the bunny-eared hat right off his head.
“Touche. What brings a pretty little bird like you to the rooftops all alone?”
The stranger gave him quite the side eye, though he seemed at least somewhat amused.
“What brings me, Illuga, to the rooftops, is…” His voice trailed off as he bit his lip. “Nothing. I’m just… alone.”
Quickly, the other man, Illuga, pulled out another cigarette from his pocket. He seemed only relaxed after taking his first drag, the puff of smoke leaving his mouth and dispersing into the sky in one, controlled exhale. Lohen still smells it off his lips, standing beside him, both leaning off the railing.
“Well I, Lohen, wasn’t!” He declared with a humpf, figuring if this stranger had nothing better to do either, at least Lohen could dump his frustrations on a stranger and never think about it again. “Stupid fucking guy invites me on a date, then guess what? He starts getting all doe-eyed with this– This freak of a guy! He looks like he’s never fucking seen the sun and he’s like, unnaturally tall. Looks like a fucking ghost. Didn’t even notice when I left. I bet you they’re fucking right now, with the way they were flirting right in front of me like I didn’t fucking exist.”
Illuga took a particularly long drag of his cigarette, holding onto the smoke probably longer than recommended. Then again, it was never healthy to begin with. He was looking down at the peaceful scenery below when he exhaled.
“...Did the guy have long, indigo hair? Black vest and slacks? Yellow eyes that stare into your soul?”
Lohen stared at him, completely blown away. “How’d you know?”
When Illuga looked up at him, he seemed even worse. The hand holding his smoke drooped low.
“That was my date,” he said, voice entirely strained, a little hoarse from the smoke. “We’ve been together a year, known each other even longer, but… it’s not going well as you can see.”
He tried to laugh but it obviously hurt his throat, so he just took another drag of his cigarette instead, puffing away his sadness.
“So your date left me for my date?”
“Pretty much, I guess…”
“Well, fuck them, then.”
Illuga blinked at him tiredly, but he saw the faint edge of a smile beginning to form on his lips. His face is real pretty, framed by silver locks that seem to glow under the bright moonlight, burgundy strands near the end that cut so sharp against his cream sweater, and a little mole on his face that draws you right in.
“Yea,” he echoed. “Fuck them.”
…And add sounding hot when he swears to the list.
“I think I like it better out here with you,” Lohen dared to add on, moving over a little closer to Illuga. “Your voice doesn’t hurt my ears as much.”
“Must be sensitive,” Illuga quipped back, casting a quick glance down at his bunny-eared hat held still in his hands. “I like someone straightforward. It’s… a refreshing change of pace, to say the least.”
“Oh I could tell– That man went on and on and on fucking forever. Heh, I bet Varka was thinking he’d score tonight– But they’ll be in bed and your stupid guy will still be talking about gems in the middle of it, and Varka will realize just how badly he fucked up missing me.”
“That’s if your ‘Varka’ can even get all those layers off. I swear, Flins used to put me through all these trials and mindgames just to fuck. Never knew what I was doing half the time, then he’d make me do all the work. It was so frustrating all the time, trying to figure out what he wanted me to do.”
“Sounds like an ass,” Lohen responded rather crassly. He wasn’t in the mood for filtering sweet words. That was what he did enough of for Varka earlier.
Illuga bristled a bit, but given a moment of thought and another rushed puff of his cigarette, now burnt away to nearly nothing, he seemed to relax a little.
“We… don’t work. I just–” He sighed, “Lohen, I know you’re a stranger, but– Tell me… Do you think it’s bad that… I kind of wish they’ll hit it off, just so I have a reason to leave?”
“Why wait for a reason? You seem like you want to leave now. I know I will.”
Illuga didn’t have any words for that. He moved his hand seemingly to take another drag, but by then, his cigarette had already burnt out. He snuffed the burnt part and stuck it in his coat pocket, probably not wanting it anywhere near Lohen’s hands again.
“It feels wrong,” he whispered, his words nearly being carried off in the wind. “It’s not right, but it’s all I have. He’s all I have, Lohen.”
He could sympathize with that. Admittedly, he didn’t have much besides Varka, either… He has people he fools around with sometimes, but none of them stuck. Varka was the only person he was willing to give it a real go at a relationship with, but obviously, that turned out like shit.
“And you’re gonna keep that around your life? I didn’t take you for some pathetic prey that takes it lying down.”
The way Illuga’s eyes instantly turned to shock, eyes brimming wide was hilarious– He obviously hadn’t expected it.
Lohen thought maybe he’d get a good fight out of it, but strangely, Illuga laughed. It felt only partly out of humor, but moreso, it carried the faint tinge of something bitter, like a sweet that had been dipped in hard liquor. Lohen let it ring out for a while, just his bitter laughing on a lonely rooftop with only him and the moon as audience. He has a feeling Illuga needs it, quite badly.
When he stopped, Illuga firmly gripped his shoulder which he entirely hadn’t been expecting– The force behind it is surprising as Illuga looked back at him, crazed like a man that’s just had the revelation of a lifetime– Well, maybe he just did.
“You’re right,” he hisses, but the smile on his face is bordering manic. Lohen feels a bit of whiplash from how calm and serene the man had been earlier– But it’s not a bad change at all. Afterall, how could Lohen claim to find it unattractive when he was a little crazy himself?
“I can’t take this anymore. All the mindgames– Well fucking sue me for wanting a partner who’ll actually tell me what he wants! All the bullshit I let him get away with just because he looks at me some way and has some sweet words for me I barely even know what mean– I’m done!”
Illuga seemed out of breath when he finished speaking. Lohen could hear the very way his lungs rattled as he heaved for breath, still smell the smoke off his lips and wafting from his coat. He stood there paralyzed as Illuga used him as support, holding onto his shoulder as he bent forward taking in air, before finally coming up.
“...Sorry,” he croaked.
“Don’t be,” Lohen said breathlessly. “I think you needed that more than me.”
Illuga winced, but he didn’t deny it. Instead, his hand slowly started to lift off him, but it hesitated.
“...Aren’t you cold, dressed like this at night?”
The hand rubbed at his shoulder again, as if feeling the chill through his skin. Lohen tried to ignore how that simple touch felt warmer than any way Varka’s ever touched him.
“It’s fine,” he mumbled instead.
Illuga frowned, and seemed to think about it for a while.
Then, he shucked off his own coat, and quickly swung it across Lohen’s shoulders.
The warmth surrounded him instantly, Lohen glanced back and forth between Illuga and the foreign coat rapidly–
“W-won’t you be cold?” Was all he could say, stupidly.
Illuga gave him a smile that felt warmer than the coat itself. He tugged it tighter around Lohen’s shoulders.
“It’s alright,” he said softly, back to his small and soothing voice that ran smooth circles through Lohen’s brain. “I’ve got a sweater, and I’m more used to the cold. You keep it– Get home safe tonight, alright?”
Quietly accepting the coat around his shoulders, Lohen threw his arms through the sleeves. It fit on him well, though a little loose on the shoulders Lohen thought might’ve been the fabric stretching to fit its owner over a very, very long and thorough lifetime of use. He feels one side very slightly heavier, with the cigarette box and lighter, as well as the antiseptic and burnt out end. He could smell the smoke from it so much clearer now– And maybe a hint of something a little woody, like pine.
“You… want me to take it home?”
“I’d rather you be warm your entire way home, yes.”
“How would I get it back to you?”
“Don’t worry about it– Just stay warm for me.”
Lohen felt his cheeks flush a bit at the man, formerly a stranger’s words– And he thought about Varka and that ghost guy, Flins, probably having the time of their life and he thinks to himself, fuck them, I deserve this.
“Maybe I can have your number, so I’ll be able to return it later.”
Illuga smiles for him again. A true, full one, that’s happy and not bitter.
“I’d be happy to.”